Trigger Warning; Tony has a panic attack in this chapter.
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Over eleven years ago, before Grace was born — before she changed Tony — something happened in Switzerland. Something seemingly insignificant at the time. Something Tony hasn't thought about since it happened.

There was a party. There was Happy Hogan. There was Maya Hansen. There was, briefly, Ho Yinsen.

And there was Aldrich Killian.

He was insignificant. He told Maya he was a fan of her work, he told them about AIM, he tried to give Tony his business card. Tony didn't take it. He was preoccupied with Maya.

But he stopped long enough to tell Killian to meet him on the roof in five minutes. He said he wanted to work with him. He had no intention of doing so.

And then Maya told him about Extremis.

He slept with her, and he left in the morning before she woke up. Now, he certainly regrets it — his whole lifestyle back then — and he would apologize if he knew where she was or what she was doing. But he doesn't.

He's about to.

~~~~

The lab is in complete disarray. Tony had been working on his new Iron Man suit — Mark 42 — and the function of each piece of the suit attaching to him separately until it formed the whole thing. It went haywire, of course.

But then the news comes on, and it gets so much worse.

The logo flashes. Scenes of this horrible, evil man, walking like a dictator in front of kneeling, suffering, innocent people plays. It makes Tony's stomach churn. A voice over begins. "Some people call me a terrorist-" behind the man as he walks away, the people are shot "-I consider myself a teacher."

Footage of America — happy children on the Fourth of July, smiling Americans, the capital — plays. "America." The man's face, his eyes covered by sunglasses, appears again. "Ready for another lesson? In 1864 in Sand Creek, Colorado, the U.S. military waited till the friendly Cheyenne braves-" their faces pop up on the screen rapidly "-had all gone hunting — waited to attack and slaughter the families left behind, and claim their land." In the next shot, the sunglasses disappear. "Thirty-nine hours ago the Ali Al Salem Air Base in Kuwait was attacked." He stuttered — not out of remorse or regret, but because he seemingly couldn't keep himself from laughing. Like it was all a joke." I-I-I did that. A quaint military church filled with wives and children, of course... The soldiers were out on maneuvers, the braves were away."

Footage of the explosion and shots of the President pop up. "President Ellis, you continue to resist my attempts to educate you, sir. And now, you've missed me again... You know who I am, you don't know where I am, and, now, you'll never see me coming." More footage of explosions and guns — attacks — appear, then the video cuts out.

"And, now that we seem to be back, let's recap some of the frightening developments we've seen," a news anchor begins. "American airwaves were hijacked. The nation remains of high alert. All attempts to find The Mandarin have been unsuccessful."

The Mandarin. That's what he calls himself.

Present Ellis appears on screen, making an address to the American people. "Central to my Administration's response to this terrorist event is a newly minted resource. I know him as Colonel James Rhodes. The American people will soon know him as the Iron Patriot."

Rhodey walks over in an Iron Man suit, this one painted red, silver, and blue. It looks more like a glorified firework than a weapon created to protect the United States.

But, right now, it's the best they've got.

~~~~

In a bar and grill, Tony and Rhodey are sitting, having a few drinks and catching up. On the TV above them, Joan Rivers is talking. "Same suit, but painted red, white, and blue. Look at that. And they also renamed him Iron Patriot. You know, just in case the paint was too subtle."

Tony gives Rhodey a pointed look. Rhodey says, "It tested well with focus groups, okay?"

Tony scoffs and mocks him. "I am Iron Patriot-"

"Listen, War Machine was a little too aggressive, alright? This sends a better message."

Tony sighs. "So what's really goin' on? With the Mandarin? Seriously, can we talk about this guy?"

Tony scoots over to Rhodey so they can whisper. Rhodey quietly says, "It's classified information, Tony." Tony leans closer, and Rhodey relents. "Okay, there've been nine bombings."

"Nine," Tony says, his stomach churning again.

"The public only knows about three." Rhodey sighs. "Here's the thing: Nobody can ID a device. There's no bomb casings."

"You know I can help, just ask. I got a ton of new tech, I got a prehensile, I got a- I got a new bomb disposal. Catches explosions mid-air."

Rhodey looks at him. "When's the last time you got a good night's sleep?"

Two days, Tony thinks. He can't sleep. He's tried. It just keeps replaying in his head... "Einstein slept three hours a year. Look what he did-"

"People are concerned about you, Tony," Rhodey replies. "I'm concerned about you. I know Grace has to be concerned-"

"She's fine."

"I know she's fine, but you're not-"

"You're gonna come at me like that?" Tony asks.

"No, no," Rhodey says hastily. "I'm not trying to-"

But then two kids walk up to their table — a boy and a girl. The girl is older, probably around Grace's age. She holds a paper out to Tony. "Do you mind signing my drawing?"

Tony smiles. "Of course." She really reminds him of Grace now, though Grace has started painting more than drawing lately. Tony looks at the drawing the girl handed him.

It's him. In the Iron Man suit. With the missile. In space.

He swallows thickly, feeling something wrong in his chest. "What's your name?"

"Erin," she replies.

As he begins signing the drawing, Rhodey leans over to him. "Listen, the Pentagon is scared. After what happened in New York — aliens, come on. They need to look strong. Stopping the Mandarin is priority, but it's not-"

He tries to focus on Rhodey's words. Breathing is becoming harder. He doesn't show it. "It's superhero business, I get it."

"No, it's not, quite frankly," Rhodey says. "It's American business."

He's applying too much pressure to the crayon Erin handed him. It's too loud, his chest too tight. Something is wrong. Something is very wrong. "That's why I said I... got it."

The crayon snaps. Tony feels hot. Something is wrong. He's taking in deep breaths. Rhodey's brows furrow. "Are you okay?"

He puts his hand on his face. "I broke the crayon."

"Are you okay, Mr. Stark?" Erin asks. Her voice sounds far away.

Rhodey puts his hand on Tony's shoulder. "Take it easy, Tony."

Erin's little brother — he can't be more than six — asks, "How did you get out of the wormhole?"

Tony jumps up, pushing away from the table. Something is wrong. He can't breathe. His throat is closing. His vision is blurry. It's too loud. He needs to get out, he has to get out.

"Tony!" Rhodey calls.

Tony pushes past people, running into them. He's dying. Something is wrong. Something to do with the arc reactor, it has to be. He whispers apologies to the people around him.

He finds the suit where it stands outside and gets into it quickly. "Check the heart, check the- check the- is it the brain?"

"No sign of cardiac anomaly or unusual brain activity," Jarvis says.

"Okay, so I was poisoned?"

"My diagnosis is that you've experienced a severe anxiety attack."

Tony stops. That doesn't make any sense. He's Tony Stark. He's Iron Man. He's a father, he's a loving boyfriend, he's a hero. He's a protector. He's not afraid. He's not anxious — he can't be. "Me?"

Rhodey taps on his helmet. "Come on, man. This isn't a good look. Open up."

"Sorry, I gotta split." He flies off quickly, heading for home, trying to think of any physical problem he could have that would've caused what just happened.

When he reaches home, he lands and exits the suit. He's still short of breath, but it's getting better.

He walks into the main living room, looking for someone. He finds Grace sitting on the couch, watching Supernanny. She turns and smiles at him. "Hey, Dad."

He smiles, and some of the weight is lifted off his chest. "Hey, sweetheart." He sits down next to her and puts his arm around her shoulders. "How was your day?"

"Good," she replies. "I finished reading The Chronicles of Narnia. I think I'm gonna start The Hunger Games tomorrow."

"After your school work."

She rolls her eyes playfully. "Yeah, yeah."

In a few minutes, Tony can breath easy.