Many Years Later

It was midsummer and the heat was becoming unbearable leaving everyone with no choice but to stay inside. I was doing the dishes my wedding ring glinting in the sunlight that came in through the window. There were light footsteps running down the halls a high-pitched voice giggling and speaking nonsense. Washing away the suds of soap and turning off the faucet I made my way over to the living room where my little girl was playing with her dolls making up countless of stories.

"Mommy come play with me," the 4-year-old shrieked loudly.

"I'm coming baby make some space," I told her as she had a mess of Barbies' and accessories thrown around.

I sat on the floor with her for about an hour following her lead in whatever she wanted to happen with her doll's life. She'd often scold me saying it wasn't like that at all and I'd simply laugh and apologize. She looked so much like her dad and definitely inherited his looks full eyebrows and big smile included. The only thing she got from me was that she's a girl.

Eventually she got distracted by the cartoons on the TV leaving me behind with her dolls. Rolling my eyes at her attention span I got off the floor carefully and went into the kitchen to get started on dinner. Like clockwork the front door opened closer to 5 pm and the steps of my Lilly ran to the front door to greet her dad.

"Daddy!" she exclaimed.

"Lilly!" he shouted back.

Heavy steps got closer and closer to where I was at and soon enough the familiar arms of my husband were around me. With his arms still around me, I turned, leaning my back into the sink. He stared lovingly at me brushing strands of my hair behind my ears. The descending sun illuminated his manly features, and I couldn't believe it would almost be 9 years since we've been together. How times fly! It seems like only yesterday I was chasing after him to get answer about who my roommate was only to find out Eun-Jae was a guy.

"How are you today beautiful?" he asked, brushing his thumb on my cheek.

"I'm tired," I pouted, looking down at my growing stomach where our second child was currently residing.

"This little one keep growing, huh?" he lightly chucked, pecking my lips.

"Tell me about it," I scoffed before pointing at my belly, "I want him out."

"Three more months to go and he'll be here with us," Eun-Jae comforted me, placing his hand on my stomach only for the little guy to kick.

"I hope he looks like me Lilly completely refused my looks," I told him turning back around to finish the dishes.

"I'm sure he will and if he doesn't, we can just try again," he said nudging my shoulder.

"Not so fast Jae," I laughed, "Let's wait for this one first."

"I'm sorry," he apologized kissing the back of my head, going upstairs to change before dinner.

Later that night after tucking Lilly into bed I wandered into our room fluffing the pillows so they'd aid my aching back. Eun-Jae was sitting in bed going over something about his job in the tablet. Grabbing one of his arms I raised it so I could tuck into his side while he did whatever he had to do. Pregnancy made me needy and touch deprived something he learned the first time around hence why he didn't question it.

"Nari?" Eun-Jae whispered in case I was asleep.

I hummed letting him know I was listening.

"I got offered a promotion at the firm," he revealed nervously.

"What? That's great Jae," I exclaimed, sitting up to properly congratulate him.

"Yeah..." he hesitantly answered.

"What's wrong?" I asked him, knowing something was bothering him. He should be happy he got a promotion he has dedicated his career to that architectural firm going up the ranks as the years gone by.
"They are opening a new location for the company in Seoul, and they want me to be the head of it," he explained gauging my reaction to the location.

"Oh," I simply let out, shocked.

"I don't have to take it, but I thought I'd bring it up just in case," he quickly added, rubbing my arm in comfort.

"You should take it, it's a once in a lifetime opportunity," I reassured him I was okay with it, "Think about it, I'm not working right now so moving shouldn't be a problem besides Lilly knows her Korean pretty well and she's young, so she'll have no problem adapting."

At the beginning of my pregnancy, I quit my job when the doctor told me I could have some complications. He especially told me I had to reduce stress levels so leaving seemed like the right thing to do. Eun-Jae wholeheartedly agreed, especially knowing his job paid pretty well to support us.

"If you're sure, then okay, still, I'm not saying anything till Friday, so you have a few more days to think about it," his eyes stared intently into mine assuring me we didn't have to do it if I was not comfortable.

"No, we're doing this. Whatever happened all those years ago is in the past, I can't keep what happened from stopping us from this amazing opportunity," I spoke firmly, the decision was made. We were moving to Seoul soon.

Eun-Jae soon fell asleep yet for some reason I kept tossing and turning. Giving up on the idea of any sleep, I got up and went downstairs preparing some tea and sitting on the sofa. I turned on the TV on a low volume and flipped through the channels until I landed on MTV. Trashy "reality" shows were playing, but it was enough to get my minds off of things. Apparently, the universe didn't want to please me as the face of the man keeping me up appeared on the screen. MTV was playing a throwback to an MTV Unplugged starring BTS.

I remembered that show vividly because soon after I broke off my almost two-year relationship with Kim Taehyung, my first love. They say you never forget your first love, and they might be right. Then again, I never had a chance to because his face was everywhere I went. It was partially the reason I moved from away from South Korea I couldn't stand having him so close yet so far.

To this day I wasn't sure what exactly happened to break us apart. I tried so hard to hold on and not let him go, but he ripped my hand away causing me to fall from cloud nine. The pandemic had struck and, in an attempt, to be closer to him I moved back to Seoul it was simple since my classes at the time were online. It was amazing because even if he was working, he wasn't nearly as busy as he would be, but soon quarantine got to him and he started withdrawing to the point where his old issues came back and as hard as I tried helping him, I couldn't help him. He pushed me away until what we had was over. It was one of the worst pains I've felt and don't tell anyone, but it might have been worse than when I gave birth to Lilly. All of the promises we had made went down the drain leaving me broken.

A year later back at home in California and on my fourth year of college Eun-Jae comes in on a year long exchange program. He had broken up with his girlfriend and the opportunity for an amazing architecture program at my University came up. We bonded over the pain of heartbreak until our hearts healed and somewhere along the way we fell for each other and the rest is history.

In my heart there will always be a small piece that will belong to Kim Taehyung. After the break up I couldn't bear to hear anything BTS related, I took down my posters, stored all the plushies, and gave Olivia a box of the things Taehyung gave me to hide. I couldn't get rid of them no matter how hard I tried.

Right now, he's married, he found a girl who managed to help him a lot more than I could. They have a son together. Unlike when the public found out about me everyone loved her and that shit hurt, but it made me realize that maybe we just were never meant to be. Maybe he needed me to get to a certain point in life where he would find better things.

The last time I saw him was at Olivia's and Jimin's wedding. It was hard at the time since I was maid of honor and he was best man. He tried acting like nothing happened between us and I followed his lead not wanting to ruin my best friend's wedding. We did speak properly once where he apologized what he did to me and I accepted it even if it was one too many years late.

Alas, life goes on and I am very happy with the life I lead. I have a wonderful husband, an adorable daughter, a supportive family, and great friends. Taehyung would forever symbolize a part of my youth where I thought nothing could go wrong and I was invincible.

As the younger versions of BTS finished singing the iconic 'Fix You' I turned off the TV to head back upstairs. All this reflecting completely making up my mind that moving to Seoul would be the best thing for our family. The past is in the past it's time to live in the now. I left the empty cup of tea on the sink and slowly headed up the stairs.

All of the lights were off having memorized this house like the palm of my hand. I knew where every corner and step was including those who creak. Yet I seemed to have forgotten I have a daughter who likes leaving her toys thrown around and didn't notice a little car by in one of the steps. Stepping on it with my bare feet I stumbled I tried holding on to the railing, but my hands slipped. My body fell down the flight of stairs, hitting my head in the process and seeing black.

I woke up startled clutching my stomach to see if my baby was okay. Relief flooded my body to see that everything seemed fine. The bed was empty beside me, standing up I slowly went out of the room. I gripped the railing of the stairs tightly, making sure to watch my steps and avoid an accident. A delicious aroma wafted from the kitchen and standing in the middle was the person I was searching for.

"My little flower what are you doing out of the bed?" he questioned, kissing my cheek and pulling out a chair so I'd sit.

"Tae, these pregnancy dreams keep getting worse," I whined, holding onto his waist so he wouldn't leave. My head kept replaying the dream where he wasn't with me anymore.

"What was it this time?" he asked, pulling out another chair and sitting beside me. As always, he held my hands brushing his fingers on my knuckles.

"I dreamt I was married to Eun-Jae and that you and I had broken up in horrible terms," I pouted, "You had even married another girl and had a son with her," I told him, tears in my eyes. Damn hormones going crazy.

"I'm still here flower it was just a dream you have nothing to worry about you're the only one for me," he softly spoke, bringing up his hand to kiss where my wedding ring would usually be if it wasn't for my hands swelling due to the pregnancy.

"I know, but it was still very sad and scary," a tear streamed down my face. Taehyung reacted quickly brushing it off with a finger.

"Don't keep thinking about it," he lightly laughed at my mood swings, "Maybe some food will keep your mind off of it."

"Yes, please," I perked up any sadness I felt dissipating at the mention of food.

That afternoon I got ready to go out. We were attending my brother's birthday party in my parents' house. In case you were wondering he doesn't live there anymore but my parents insisted on having it there. Taehyung helped me with my shoes considering I was eight months pregnant and would burst anytime now.

"There we go, all done," Tae said, standing up and extending his hands to help me off the bed.

"Thank you. Have I ever told you you're the best?"

"I think it's come up a time or two," he shot me a cute side smile.

"One more time won't hurt. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me Taehyung," I truthfully told him.

"Are we having this argument again?" he sighed, teasingly rolling his eyes.

"Yes," I giggled.

"How many times do I have to tell you that it's the other way around," Taehyung said while staring into my eyes, "You were the one who came in and saved me from my own complicated mind. You were the one who made me trust in others and in myself. You are the one who makes me happy each and every day. So, no YOU were the best thing that happened in my life."

"Agree to disagree," I stubbornly replied. It wasn't the first time we had this argument and it certainly won't be the last.

Poking his tongue in his cheek, he murmured, "For now."

In my childhood home everyone who was attending was almost there. The only ones missing were Olivia and Jimin but that's to be expected from them. Macy and I were talking to my mom about pregnancy things as Macy was also expecting but only being three months along. We were so psyched to know our future children would be the same age. The only one missing was Liv.

Finally, Olivia and Jimin arrived hand in hand and we could get the party started. Non-alcoholic drinks were passed around in consideration that there were two pregnant women. Mom had made a delicious dinner, I had devoured which made Taehyung laugh. I was glad that throughout the years he accepted my love of food because when I became pregnant that got amplified. It was not cute.

"Have any baby names in mind Nari?" Macy asked across from me.

"Not really, we're going to wait till the baby is born and see what fits them," I explained with a smile a hand going to my belly as an instinct.

"You lie," Olivia piped up, "If it's a girl you're naming her Olivia," she firmly said.

"You're wrong, they are naming the baby Jimin it works as a boy and girl name, right Taehyunie?" Jimin spoke up with a teasing grin.

"I don't need another you in my life," Taehyung sassily responded with a raise of his eyebrows.

"You wound me, you know pretty well two Jimin's is better than one," Jimin scoffed, turning his head away from his soulmate.

"No to the both of you. We want something unique," I said before a joke evolved into a fight, "What about you Mace?"

"I do have a few ideas, but I'm keeping them a surprise," she said, bringing a finger up to her lips.

"I see how it is keeping secrets after 12 years of friendship," I pouted, but in reality, I was joking. Names were a big deal you could either give your kid a good name or ruin their life.

We moved into the living room to be more comfortable. Taehyung had an arm wrapped around my shoulders as he spoke to my brother. I felt the baby lightly kick which was something I couldn't get enough of. Grabbing Taehyung's free hand, I placed it in my tummy where the baby kicked again a little harder feeling their dad's presence. Tae stopped talking to my brother, focusing on the little sporadic kicks as a large boxy smile formed on his lips. It's one of the happiest I've ever seen him, and we have had a lot of happy moments, but I understood why. He has always wanted a big family, and this is the beginning of that. Although thinking about it, our family started forming the moment we met, and it included the people that were constantly around us.

Looking around the room, I only saw happiness there were no serious worries. Although we were older, we are still those same people who went to a BTS concert, the same people who made drinking a challenge, the same people who would bicker constantly, and most importantly the same people who loved with their whole being and would do anything to see the other happy.

There were many years ahead of us yet this was only the beginning of our story. What a way to set things off.

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