Rin pov

"Now, now, Amaimon, we don't want to rile Rin up again. After he has a few guests. You can play with him later," Mephisto tasks, keeping me away from the vegetable-haired weirdo.

"What Guests?" I ask. 

Mephisto snaps and we appear in an office. Two people sit on the couches. They smell familiar. I let go of the embrace. The two humans stand up. One I recognize immediately. 

"Shiro?"

He stands, an undescribable emotion spreads across his face. Something between grief and sorrow but undeniable elation. His eyes grow wide and his lips weave between a frown and a smile. I'm not sure my face is any more understandable. 

The feelings that first come to mind aren't easily obtained. Like a boat that is somewhere between sinking and jumping off the water, I am lost sailing the sky or the sandy ocean floor. 

He still looks the same as the day I left, his memory is still as strong as that day. Every party, every dinner time, I remember it all. He even smells the same, that faint but comforting wood and plain lye soap smell that populated every bathroom in the old temple. 

"Rin," He says softly. "You have grown so much." 

He steps forward but I step back. 

He wasn't there. I begged for him to come back, but he wasn't there. Lucifer saved me, Lcuifer was my only support. Shiro betrayed me, he left me to die, and he let them take me. Now he stands before me as the paladin, the top murderer of all demon kind, the one who stood idly by while I was tortured.

the pained expression on his face doesn't make sense. The seeming pain that my hesitancy caused has no bearing. He betrayed me, so why does he seem so hurt?

In a moment that sorrow seems to morph into anger. Before I can stop him he approaches me and...

He hugs me, for an old man his grip is tight enough to squeeze the air from my lungs and tears pour from his eyes.

Something inside me breaks, and I fall into him. 

I can't stop myself, every second of that moment of separation peaks in my mind. Every second that I begged for him to come back, for them to stop. All the hate I carried for years, seems obsolete now.

Only one question remains. 

"Why?" I ask, barely above a whisper.

It's loud enough to get Shiro's attention. "Why what Rin?"

"Why did you let them take me?" more tears well in my eyes as I ask that question. I didn't ever think I would lose control of myself like this again, I am far too grown to be sobbing like this, but I can't stop myself.

"I would have taken you back and killed that bastard given the chance, I promise you. But you are old enough to understand now, why I couldn't. Even if Lucifer wanted to share, the order would still be after you, no matter how hard or long I tried to keep you safe."

The other one stands and walks over. I struggle to place his face although his mention is far easier to read. He looks disappointed and mad.

"It's been a struggle to keep Yukio safe as well. After you were taken the order kept a close eye on us. Your brother has worked hard to get them to trust us again," Shiro wiped away some of the tears on my face.

Very quickly all the remorse I had for lost time seems to snap away as I lock eyes with Yukio. It was undeniable now, I remembered him, but on a deeper level, I saw through him. For as human as he looked the pure disdain that floated in his eyes wasn't anything other than demonic. He hated me, and maybe on some level, he expected me to hate him as well. Maybe my hate would justify his. 

Samael stepped between us, breaking the line of sight as he chuckled nervously. "Well, it seems they recognize each other." He muttered, failing to break the new sheet of tension. 

"Rin, how have you been for the past ten years?" Shiro redirected the conversation, loosening his grip on me and allowing me to breathe. 

"It's been wonderful, I am treated well, and respected. Lucifer treats me wonderfully. He makes me feel safe and calm. I'm not shamed for who or what I am, it's a perfect life, I couldn't wish for more."

Part of it is a lie, a lie that everyone other than Yukio seems to be able to see through, but Shiro at least seems unwilling to test it. 

"How have things been? Of course other than the order being overbearing," I add it's customary to ask them about their lives. Humans and their strange traditions. 

"Not much has happened at all," Shiro replies, it seems equally deceitful as my lie. Oh well, at least we are equally honest. 

"Nothing has changed, even with the churchmen?" From what I recalled, they were always a bit frail.

"Sadly we lost one of our congregation last year, but the rest of us have been healthy," Shiro says with sadness.

"Loss is hard for us all." I couldn't think of anything else to say, I had been lucky enough to have a caretaker who never dies, even if ten or a hundred bodies are taken, Lucifer lives on.

"Yes, for as short of lifespans humans have, they never fail to leave an impact," Samael remarks walking over to his desk.

Yukio is closer now, and his hate is all too apparent now. It takes all the strength I have not to make him regret his scowl.

"it almost makes the destruction they cause worth it," I smile at Yukio.

He scoffs and walks toward the door. "Yukio," Shir calls out. "Where are you going?"

"That's not my brother," He huffs, placing his hand on the doorknob and flinging it open to reveal Lucifer. 

Light pours into the room around him, and Shima scurries in behind him looking like a guilty dog. Yukio tumbles back and hurries off to the corner of the room. Lucifer hardly even looks at him as he walks in. Shima rushes to Yukio's side, and Yukio slaps him away. Very quietly they seem to have an argument, but my attention is quickly drawn back to Lucifer, who seems to be around me in a flash. I look around, and Shiro is at the front of Samael's desk, using Samael as a cover from the light.

Lucifer gently moves up chin up, focusing my sight back on him. I can't hide my grin.

He came for me! He always does.

I fold my hand around his, using my other to press against his chest, feeling the unburdened heartbeat deep in his chest. "It really did work."

This is the proudest I have felt, Lucifer is perfect now. He got the one thing he desired most, and I gave it to him. This moment stands as proof of that very fact. The furious expression of Samael confirms it as well, there is nothing stopping Lucifer now, and it's all thanks to me. 

But behind it, the horror on Shiro's face. It takes the joy out of the moment. All color seems to fade, and the light dulls. Emotions collide in a way that can only be described as agony, as I am split into two inequally stable sides. 

Lcuifer's grip tightens every so softly and my eyes dart back to him, but I can't hide the concern I feel now. 

Was this really the right thing to do?

Of course, it was, Lucifer saved me, all he has ever done was cared for me.

But now, part of me can only see the face in front of me with the same horror that burdens Shiro. 

I gave Lucifer the opportunity to do anything. He is just as limitless as I am, now he is only smarter and wiser than I am. I hadn't thought he would be anything other than kind to me, he would only do what's best for humanity. But it seems Shiro doesn't think so.

No human greets a liberator with that look. No one thanks a god with terror.

As I meet Lucifer's eyes I can hear my own heart begin to blare in my mind. Seconds melt away and the world stands still.

I made a monster-no, I supported a monster-cultivated it, fed it, and praised it for all it did.

What had I done?

"Rin," Lucifer cooed, his words seemed like ice on my ears, tensing every nerve in my body. "are you alright?"

A numbness came over me, a sudden dull shock that blurred my system. I felt dizzy all of a sudden as I tried to reply. 

"Yes," I muttered quickly, but I faltered too much in my voice. He could tell I was far beyond sure of my answer. 

"I'm sure this has been hard for you. You need some rest." Lucifer stated, brushing my hair to the side.

I redied my eyes over his shoulder, and we were back. Back in the room, I had been so eager to leave this morning.

Lucifer kept his arms around me, but he took away his hand letting my head loosely hang off my neck. 

Was any of this even real? It didn't feel real.