(Guys sorry I didn't have any inspiration whatsoever but randomly, it hit me so I'm writing again! I love you!)

An entire week went by, me busy working, and I still hadn't seen Saturn. A bar isn't a place for a guy like me to be, especially if Saturn ends up not being there.

Sunlight streamed through the crack between the curtains. It's Friday. I lay on my bed, staring at the ceiling, giving Saturn my train of thought without stopping myself like I normally would.

I head into work an hour later, and while we were waiting for customers to come in, I turned to Amber across the aisle, "What does it mean when a girl takes you into her motel room?"

She laughs, "did you sleep with her?"

"No!"

"Yeah, sure, Luke.. What else would it mean? That's probably all she wants, you know.."

I shake my head, "I have a hard time believing that.."

Just then, a blonde girl with a space cat shirt walks in. She looks about 13. I finish stocking cans of chili as Amber makes her way to the checkout area.

I start heading home that day, when the sun isn't quite setting yet, but it still turns the sky an orange pink. The walk home is lonely since Amber had to rush off to a dentist's appointment.

I get home and my parents greet me from their places on the couch but I hurry off into my bedroom. I spend an hour or so alternating between reading and playing Runescape.

It's Friday night and this is the only way you know how to spend it?? I think to myself.

Well I could always.....

No.

You're not walking into that bar again.

But maybe...

I let the arguememt occur in my head before coming to the conclusion that I can't even make that decision until my parents are asleep.

My mother knocks at my door.

"Come in!"

She pokes her head through the doorway, "we're heading to bed. Love you," and walks out.

The night carries on. I don't contemplate my decision anymore as I make my way towards the front door. I first write a note to my parents, telling them I'm at Sam's just in case.

I call Sam.

"Hey!" he greets me.

"I'll meet you at the bar." I say, knowing he won't have an issue with spending the night out.

"Look who turned into a rebel!!!" he says, surprised.

I laugh and tell him I'll see him soon, hanging up the phone. I feel a familiar anxiety as the bar comes into view. I really don't belong here. Sighing, I make my way inside.

It's really busy, the people mingling loudly, drinks in their hands. Music is playing but it's nothing that Saturn couldn't show a good time with an acoustic guitar.

I find my place against the wall, alone and awkward. My eyes scan the room for the girl with long blonde locks. After five minutes, I give up, letting my eyes fall to my shoes. I grab my phone and pretend I'm texting someone although I'm just putting on a show, letting the regret seep in. She's not here. I feel a tap on my shoulder, and I turn, almost hopeful. It's Sam. I try to not look at him with too much disappointment.

He insists I drink something and buys me a beer. I tell him I need a minute and step outside. I sit on the curb. I've drank maybe three times, and even then, I was only slightly buzzed. I take a sip of 'my' Bud Light. I end up drinking it all. And I don't know if it's the drink or my only running on five hours of sleep but I miss Saturn, and it hurts. The street light over head drowns me out. I chuck the bottle at the empty street in front of me and get up. I walk slowly along the sidewalk.

I reach her hotel. I step inside. Heading to Room 54, I realize just how much it would mean for her to answer the door tonight.

I ready myself for a second before knocking. I step back afterwards and purse my lips out of habit, my eyes at the floor. The door opens. My heart rises as I smile. She doesn't have makeup on, wearing sweats and a tank top.

She looks concerned. I don't know why but I cry and collapse into her embrace.

"I fucking missed you" I whisper it. I feel like announcing it to the world would ruin it all.

"It's only been like a week.." she says, but adds, "come in.."

I let go of her and we step into her motel room. I gather my emotions and apologize for looking like an idiot.

"Don't say sorry. You're totally fine! This is what we do, I'm here for you. 24/7." she promises. I nod.

"Do you want to stay the night?"

"Would it be too much?"

"Not at all! What did we just assess?!"

I laugh and because I don't get up and leave or say anything to suggest me doing so before dawn, an unsettled agreement hangs in the atmosphere that yes. I'm staying.

I head into the bathroom. I look at myself in the mirror and realize I'm a wreck. I look tired beyond tired. I splash cold water on my face. I exit the bathroom and see that Saturn has climbed into bed, leaning against the headboard.

She smiles at me so naturally, "Care to join me?"

I lay between the sheets and under a thin blanket, in jeans and a tee shirt. There's so much distance between us, to avoid awkwardness, but I want nothing more than to erase it all.

"We can stay here and talk if that's what you need. Just tell me."

"Being here is enough."

She laughs slightly before turning off the lamp on the nightstand.

Is this really where we are, lying in bed together, after seeing each other twice? Am I overthinking this?

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I love this i love this I love this. Sorry about such a long wait for an update.

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