~Somebody told me about tomorrow,

And my soul's not hollow,

You see, we gotta find our place,

And we'll go there now~

Months passed, until the semester was drawing to a close. Zayn's smoking had decreased, since his stress relief now came from spending time with Grant. And now that all of his finals were complete, the weight of the world felt off of his shoulders. He was utterly free for the next month, with nothing to worry about, except that he wouldn't be seeing Grant, since his family was going away for a couple weeks. This was their last night together until the new year. Zayn passed his math class with flying colors, thanks to all of the after hours study sessions - there was no cheating or faking of scores - he was smart and deserved his place at MIT.

A giggly cuddly mess, laying in Grant's bed with him, tired and happy. The professor stares back at him with love in his eyes, absolutely smitten with the younger boy. Running his hands through the black hair that had been cut in the last several months but was growing out again, he smiled at him as Zayn wrapped his arms around his waist.

"We haven't talked about your Christmas plans, ey?" He says, kissing Zayn's forehead.

"Just staying in the dorms," He sighs, welcoming the hug and the skin to skin contact that it provides.

Grant frowned. "Not gonna go see your family?"

Zayn didn't think about his family very much anymore - he had distanced himself very much from them as soon as he left for college. Calls were very infrequent, and he had never gone back to visit them. "Nope." He said. "No money for a plane ticket."

Grant sat up in the way that he always did when Zayn said something about money, looking through the clothes on the floor for his pants, which contained his wallet. "No please, Grant. I don't need money."

"It's Christmas! You should spend time with your family!" He was insistent about giving Zayn money whenever he needed something - and Zayn was always needing new shoes, or a backpack.

Zayn sat up, looking for his yellow shirt. "I'm not taking your money! I'll leave right now!" Grant handed him five one hundred dollar bills.

"No," Zayn refused to take it, as he always did.

Grant shoved the bills in the band of Zayn's underwear. "Don't argue with me, Zayn," He was using his scary teacher voice, which always shut him up because he was reminded of who Grant was - his teacher. But not any longer, because Zayn had passed his class. "Go buy a plane ticket and see your family."

"Okay." Zayn melted under his gaze and tucked his head into Grant's neck. "I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too."

---

When Zayn returned to his dorm, he immediately called Adam. "New Year's Eve. New York. We're going. Assuming your car works."

"A-which it does!" Adam screeched. "You got cash?"

"Five hundo!" Zayn screeched back, dancing around the room with the bills still in the place that the professor had put them. "This is going to be fun!" He didn't feel bad about wasting the money that Grant had given him - Zayn would cherish the memories of hanging out with his best friend in New York more than spending another Christmas with his family. He had already spent 17 with them, after all.

---

G: happy christmas 😘

Z: to you too 😘

G: no problem, giggles

Z: hey!

G: stop giggling so much and I won't call you that

Z: 😑

---

The day before New Year's Eve, Adam, Zayn, and Edwin drove to New York city. The money was to be used for a hotel room and food. Edwin was brought along because he's old enough to buy booze, and Adam knows how to exploit an angle. Zayn tolerates his roommate by now, but the two of them are not close - and will never be friends like him and Adam.

Once the group is checked into their hotel room, they start drinking. Zayn gives Edwin money to buy some alcohol, and then they all drink. "Shots, shots, shots." Adam dances on the first queen bed in the room, which him and Zayn will share, while Edwin will have the other one. "You can really handle some liquor, can't you, Malik?"

"I've been practicing!" Zayn yells back, which startles Adam enough for him to slide onto the floor and grab another drink.

"I'm losing my mind," Edwin says, laying on the floor and staring at the ceiling. "I haven't been this drunk, well, ever."

Adam stands at the head of the room, commanding authority and demanding everyone's attention. "We're heading out! Not to a club or a bar! But a restaurant or something!"

"To find girls?" Zayn asks, knowing the answer, but dreading it nonetheless.

"Of course, my young Zaynie. You have much to learn! When was the last time you went on a date, let alone touched a girl?" He didn't want to answer, so he didn't. Adam took his silence as an answer. "Alas! We must go out! No sitting in the hotel room for two days straight! This is New York!" He bucked up, figuring he would go along with Adam's antics.

So they walked to a restaurant that doubled as a bar, and everyone went their separate ways. Adam was hitting it off with girls left and right, Edwin was deep in conversation with a brunette with a Brown University hoodie. They were probably talking about what it was like to be at high class colleges.

Zayn scanned the room, looking for anyone to start up a conversation with. He was more of an introvert at heart, but the alcohol always gave everyone an extra confidence booster. Unless it made Zayn want to cry. But what was there to cry about tonight?

Not a single girl in the room caught his attention - even the ones who were his type when he was in high school. All of the girls who were drooling over his jawline in the room - not a single one stood up. But the guy sitting at the bar who looked similar to Professor Grant had him walking across the room.

I'm gay, he was thinking. I'm so gay.

"Hi, I'm Zayn."

"You look young," The guy said.

"I'm legal," Zayn said. "Not to drink, but to smoke."

The two of them flirted for five minutes before Adam caught notice - Zayn was not subtle, and Adam really didn't care. As long as he didn't need the hotel room for an hour or so.

---

Zayn walked back to the hotel alone, around midnight. He was a crying mess, and had smoked three cigarettes in the past thirty minutes. Now that he'd had a taste of love with Professor Grant, when he didn't have it, he was a crybaby. It had been three weeks since he'd seen his man, and that was too much for him to handle. But he didn't think that a drunk phone call to his ex-math teacher on New Year's Eve was a good idea.

So he just cried and smoked on the walk back, until he found Adam passed out on the bed, drool forming a puddle under his head. He had to tell him. Everything. He just had to.

"Adam," A kick to the leg.

"Adam Clarke!" Zayn yelled, shaking the man's shoulders. He really was out hard.

Finally, Zayn played the customary Apple Alarm Clock noise - which would wake Adam no matter about. The green eyes opened to see Zayn standing in front of him, crying, at one in the morning on New Year's Eve.

"Let's talk," He said, turning off the alarm.