Warnigns: anxiety attack, roman isnt as confident as he pretends to be, roman trusts him <3, mentions virgil having had anxiety attacks, sorry roman i keep making u suffer

Prompt 1: trust

Idk college au??

Didnt really proofread this much😬

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Virgil might not like the extra and obnoxious and terribly too confident kid in his drama and writing class very much, if at all. He was loud and always so sure of himself even when he was wrong and he loved to debate with other classmates and he was so obviously outgoing and well liked and... well, he annoyed Virgil a lot.

But it wasn't as if, when stumbling upon him sitting curled up and shaking on the floor next to the drama stage after classes had ended, he was just going to turn around and leave him there.

It was tempting, definitely, but Virgil knew how absolutely shitty panic and anxiety attacks were, and he really wasn't heartless enough just to abandon him when he looked like he really needed someone. Virgil gritted his teeth at himself and let the door to the drama room shut quietly behind himself.

Deeply regretting and cursing whatever had brought both him and Roman to the drama classroom at the same time today he made his way over to where the other was sitting. He wasn't sure Roman was even aware that someone else had entered the classroom and he didn't know how to alert his presence. What if Roman would just snap at him?

Virgil took his backpack off, kneeling nearby but out of reach from the other who seemed unaware of his surroundings, busy hyperventilating and trembling.

"Hey, Roman?" Virgil said gently, keeping his voice quiet and calm, but the other still flinched and looked up at him, struggling to focus his tear filled eyes on Virgil. Loud and overly confident or not, Virgil didn't like seeing him like this. It didn't seem right, not with how he always acted in class.

"It's, um... I share some classes with you." Virgil said, realizing Roman might not know his name, though his description didn't really make it easier for Roman to figure out who he was.

Virgil had always carefully made sure to not have to engage in a conversation with Roman. He had so many friends and he seemed to enjoy arguing and Virgil really wanted to stay as far away from the center of attention as possible, which meant he was the absolute opposite of Roman who always stood and talked to a group of people and loudly answered the teachers questions and wanted the lead roles in plays and would always talk about some party that someone was having.

"Can you try a breathing technique with me? It might sound stupid but it does really help." Virgil said, not really receiving a response but deciding to begin to count out the steps for him anyway.

"Breathe in for seven seconds. Hold your breath for four seconds. Breathe out for eight seconds." Etcetera.

He continued his instructions because there was nothing else to really do and after a bit it seemed that Roman was actually following his advice and his breathing was becoming somewhat steady and his fingers that had been digging into his arms relaxed, his nails (painted with glittery golden nail polish) leaving crescent shaped marks in his skin.

Virgil kept repeating the exercise until Roman seemed to be rid of his panic, only left trembling and crying instead, entire face wet from tears. Virgil dug for a package of paper towels and offered it to Roman who took one and sat and stared at it for a while while sniffling.

Then he wiped his face, which didn't seem very useful when the tears just kept coming. Roman took another one and blew his nose.

"Here." Virgil said, extending Roman his water bottle and one of the candy bars that he always had with him just for after anxiety attacks. They were utterly exhausting, but eating and drinking something usually helped make him feel a little more like a person again.

Roman took a few tiny sips of water, shakily putting the bottle down on the floor and glancing at Virgil.

"Thanks." He said, quietly and hoarsely. Virgil merely shrugged. He didn't want to make a big deal out of doing the bare minimum for someone.

"'s fine. I've had loads of them. They suck." He said, grabbing a candy bar for himself and pushing his backpack to the side. Roman sat quietly for a long while and Virgil really had no idea what to say or what to do, so he just ate the candy bar and watched Roman drink some more water.

"The breathing thing, uh, can I have that?" Roman said finally, breaking the silence and sheepishly looking up at Virgil who was already nodding and pulling his phone out.

"I'll text it to you." He said, Roman getting the hint and telling him his phone number. Virgil wrote him a text, including the 'five things you see, four things you feel, etc' grounding technique too. He sent it and he heard a ding from Roman's pocket, assuring him that he had texted the right person.

"Thanks." Roman said again, wiping his face with another paper towel and sniffling loudly in the empty classroom.

"So, um, you have those a lot?" Virgil asked, wondering immediately if he was being nosey and making this even more uncomfortable than it surely already was, he was practically a stranger to Roman.

"No. Second time... this one was a lot easier to bear, tho." Roman admitted and Virgil wasn't sure if he sent the other a smile or a grimace. He remembered how awful and confusing his anxiety attacks had been at first, he hadn't known what was going on or how to deal with them at all.

"You've got any idea why? I mean, you don't have to tell me." Virgil said, internally berating himself because why was it so difficult to have a conversation without feeling like he was fucking everything up and making things awkward?

"I... dunno." Roman said, looking away and pulling his knees up to his chest, hugging his arms around them.

"Everything's just a lot and I don't have the time or energy to study and I need to learn my lines for the next show but I just keep messing it up and I'm gonna be awful-" At that point he buried his face in his knees, hands having come to grip to his hair. Virgil carefully reached for Roman's hands, pulling them out of his hair and reminding him to breathe.

"Sorry." Roman said, sounding so incredibly quiet and vulnerable and un-Roman-like and, damn it, Virgil couldn't stand seeing him like this.

"Maybe... I could read your lines with you? If you'd like? I know I just do tech stuff normally, but-" Virgil began, barely believing that he was offering such a thing, because he always felt so awkward on stage and why should Roman trust him enough to let him help?

"You would?" Roman asked, looking at Virgil and seeming so amazed at the offer that Virgil's chest ached.

"Yeah, why not?" It wasn't as if he really had anything better to do, he was just going to go home and procrastinate on his writing assignment that was due in two days.

Roman smiled then, and for a second Virgil could see who Roman usually was, all excitement and boldness. Virgil was beginning to realize that maybe Roman was far from as confident as he liked to make everyone think he was.

Roman ate the rest of his candy bar and drank some more water at Virgil's insistence, and then he stood up and offered Virgil a hand. They climbed up on the stage, Roman handing him copies of his lines and sending him a very wobbly and unsure smile before beginning.

It was a bit rocky at first, Virgil not entirely knowing what to do and Roman seeming very nervous about the entire thing, but soon Roman warmed up a bit and acted out his lines with more certainty and feeling. It was actually kind of fun, and Virgil felt less awkward about it, even trying to act out his lines instead of just reading them from the paper.

Roman was, well, there was no denying it, Roman was good. There was a reason he was the one who got one of the lead roles so often.

Virgil didn't know what it was that had made Roman so insecure and stressed to the point of an anxiety attack, but after two hours of rehearsing (time had passed a lot quicker than Virgil had expected it to) he didn't think roman would have much to worry about, not when it came to the play at least, Roman already seemed really sure of his lines.

A while later they were sitting down, sharing the rest of Virgil's water bottle. He was happy to note that Roman no longer seemed anxious at all, not even as pale as he had been anymore.

"Thanks for everything, uh, Virgil, right?" Roman said and Virgil raised a brow, not at all expecting the other to know his name. He didn't really talk to any of his classmates, and he didn't talk in class either. Did Roman remember his name from the start of the year introductions? That was impressive then.

"Yeah." He said, putting his empty water bottle in his backpack.

"Yeah, thank you, Virgil." He leaned his knee to the side to gently knock it against Virgil's in a gesture that seemed weirdly sincere and soft.

He just shrugged, not sure what else to respond with. Virgil put his backpack on and stood up.

"I have to get going, but, um, see you tomorrow I guess." He said and Roman nodded, standing up too.

"Maybe we could do this again, it was nice." Roman said, smiling, looking confident once more, which didn't put Virgil off anymore as he knew Roman wasn't just some loud and obnoxious dude. He was pretty nice, actually, definitely bearable to be around when he wasn't trying to impress everyone so much.

"Yeah, maybe we could." Virgil said, then being surprised by Roman pulling him into a quick hug before leaving the classroom.

Maybe, likely, Roman would go back to acting as Virgil didn't exist and they would both pretend this never happened by tomorrow but, well, Virgil was just glad Roman had trusted him to help, and maybe Virgil could trust that Roman wasn't as obnoxious as he had seemed. Maybe he could actually have someone to talk to in class.

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Written: 17th & 18th June 2021
Published: 20th June 2021
Words: 1738

I actually love them so much actually

Roman did not go back to ignoring virgil the next day. Roman would now never leave virgil alone and would you look at that theyre best friends now and they care so much for each other, thank you

Anyway event ends today ): see yall over at my other oneshot books lol