⚠ Trigger warning ⚠  character death, angst at first but somewhat of a good ending? I dunno ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ all I know is that you'll probably cry and I'm not in a very good mindset. If you don't like your favorite characters dying you probably shouldn't read this. I am so sorry.

Logan sat motionless on his bed. His legs were drawn close to his chest and his head was down, tears blurred his vision and some fell on the lenses of his glasses. How long had it been?

Days? Weeks?

Months.

Patton had passed away three months ago. Patton.

Logan's precious husband.

Gone.

His heart clenched in pain, his throat tightened, his bottom lip trembled. He turned his gaze to the photo resting on the nightstand, their wedding picture. Patton was so happy then. He was always happy nevertheless. With a trembling hand he took hold of the frame and gazed longingly at Patton's smiling face, he brushed his thumb across the photo and felt a small, sad smile, tug at the corners of his lips. “I wonder if you're smiling now, wherever you are..” He whispered.

His smile dropped. “I should have been there, I should have been there to stop you from dying, but I wasn't, and you....you didn't deserve to die. I'm so sorry...” A sob escaped his lips before he could stop himself, he clapped a hand over his mouth and just sat there. Sobbing.

An accident. That was what they had told him minutes after being told his beloved had passed away. It was only two weeks after their honeymoon and Patton was out shopping. He was helping an old woman cross the street, it was exactly like him to do good deeds, and a drunk driver swerved and hit him. Just like that, he was gone. The woman was unharmed thanks to Patton, he had saved a life by giving his own. But he also took a heart with him.

Logan's happiness, and love was taken, and he was never the same. He became more distant, he ignored his family and friends, he refused to answer the many phone calls. He was numb and empty. Nothing seemed to matter to him anymore.

A chill ran up his spine, as he cried, the hair on the back of his neck stood and he lifted his head. It had gotten cold all of a sudden and a low knocking was heard from the other room, Logan scrambled out of the bed leaving the photo lying face down. “Who's there?” He called out in a trembling voice, he removed his glasses and cleaned them with the hem of his baggy shirt before pushing them back onto the bridge of his nose.

Was someone in his house? Surely it had to have been something else, perhaps there was a raccoon scuttling on his roof, and he knew for sure he had no guest over. It was midnight. Too late for people to come over. He paused, the only sound made was his shaky breathing and small sniffs, and then once again the knocking was heard. Logan jumped at the subtlety of it, his heart hammered against his chest.

He searched around his room and quickly grabbed a tennis racket that was in the closet.

Since when did he play tennis?

He shook his head, now was not the time to be questioning his life choices.

He held the racket over his shoulder looking like a baseball player ready to hit a rushing ball, and cautiously tiptoed out of his room and whipped his head from side to side to make sure there was no one waiting to jump him. When the coast was clear he hurried off to the room where he had heard the knocking and placed his hand over the doorknob, he waited again contemplating on whether the noises were all in his head.

The loud frantic knocking proved him wrong and he once again jumped. He was never this jumpy before. But heartbreak can really take a toll on people. He shut his eyes for a moment and calmed himself. Slowly. He took a deep breath and reopened his eyes and gathered enough courage to open the door and run in. A blast of cold wind immediately hit him and he shivered as it passed right through him, he felt alert and scared.

Of what exactly? He didn't know, the room was completely empty. This was supposed to be his and Patton's room, but after Patton's death he couldn't bring himself to enter. The memories of him and his husband pained him, the photos and souvenirs. Even the smell was enough to bring him to tears. It was so overwhelming. Three months and he hadn't even thought about cleaning up the room. His pain was still fresh and raw, like a gunshot wound.

“I knew it..” He muttered and shook his head. “I really am going crazy.” He dropped the racket and leaned against a wall, he knew he should've taken therapy, but why go to someone when he already knew what was wrong with him? What would change? Patton couldn't be brought back to the dead, nothing could ever change that.

He slid down to the floor and hugged himself, he was weak. He couldn't go on living with so much pain. Depression. That was a new word to him, unknown to him at first, he never seemed like the type of person to even experience such thing, but now he had grown familiar to the word that now defined what he was going through.

He buried his face in his knees and bit back the urge to cry out. He had cried so much, for someone who used to be known as the emotionless one, it was ironic. Crying would have been the last thing that he would be seen doing. Now, it was a regular every day thing. Who could blame him though? As much as people sometimes deny it, if they had lost someone close to them they would be crying nonstop too.

As Logan silently cried to himself he felt a cool and comforting touch. Fingers ran through his scalp and he found himself leaning against the touch, but at the sudden realization he shot his head up and was met with a floating apparition of his husband. He screamed and jumped up to his feet, pressing himself further against the wall, the ghostly figure jumped back and kept his distance.

Logan breathed rapidly feeling like he would pass out any minute. “No, no no. I'm just hallucinating. This isn't real. None of this real.” He assured himself and squeezed his eyes shut. “I'll open my eyes and he'll be gone, and then I'll be alone.” He gasped and silently counted down to one. “Three...” He calmed his rapid breathing. “Two...” He swallowed the lump in his throat and balled his hands into fists. “One.”

He opened his eyes and sighed when he saw that there was no one in front of him. “Logi?” A small, soft voice called to him. That nickname. There was only one person that called him that. He turned his head and was met with Patton sitting on the bed, looking scared and concerned. “Y-you're....how can this be, you're here? No, no this, this isn't real.” Logan stammered, his eyes were wide and his heart was going a million beats per second.

He was at the verge of a panic attack, and Patton quickly caught on. He jumped up and hurried to his aid. “Shh, it's okay. Logan it's really me, I mean I may not be alive, but it is me. I swear, ask me a question that only I'll know.” He begged and stopped a few feet away from him when he flinched. “H-how did you die? And when?” He asked shakily, Patton held a sad look. “A car hit me...it was two weeks after our honeymoon. I'm sorry I left you so soon. I'm so sorry.” His lip trembled, he looked so distressed and guilty.

“I wished I could have been there with you, through the burial and all that. You must've been through so much pain, and I'm so sorry.” He cried. Logan was still in shock. Was that really his Patton? It was surreal. It felt like a dream. Seeing his beloved standing right in front of him was too good to be true. But, even he was desperate enough for a miracle. He took a step forward and held his hand out, and then he grasped onto Patton's trembling shoulder. He was surrounded by a cold aura and Logan shivered, Patton wasn't exactly all there, but he wasn't all gone either.

He was extremely fragile, like any sudden movement would break him. Patton sniffed and looked at Logan with teary eyes. “Logi, I've missed you so much.” He blubbered and wrapped his ice cold arms around him. Logan didn't know how to react. His dead husband was there. He was really there! Hugging him like he used to. “If this is a dream, I don't ever want to wake up.” He stated and returned the much needed hug.

“It's me, I don't know how, but it's me.” Patton reassured. “How? This, this is impossible.” Logan exclaimed. “I really don't know, but does it matter? I'm here with you again.” Patton smiled. Logan just held him close. “Oh Patton, I wish it could have gone differently. I wish it had been me instead of you.” He admitted. Patton gasped. “Logan! Do you have any idea what I would've done if you had died before me!? I wouldn't be able to live with myself, I would've....I would've...” He trailed off, Logan didn't need to know anymore. He knew what he would've done.

“I feel like this time we have is limited my love, surely we are defying the laws of the afterlife. Or maybe I truly have gone insane. But I don't care anymore, you're here, and that's all that matters.” He started to smile, but quickly stopped himself. Was it right to smile at a time like this? Patton took notice of his hesitation and gave him a reassuring smile. “You can smile, it's okay.” He said.

Logan smiled, something he hadn't in so long. “I love you Patton.” He missed saying those words. Patton giggled. “I love you too Logan.” But as soon as he said that, Logan swayed, he suddenly felt exhausted and drained. “Logan!?” Patton held him steady and realized what was happening. “Logan, I'm taking up your life energy. That can't be good for you, I'm hurting you.” He explained as he led him to the bed.

Logan weakly shook his head. “I don't care, you're with me, everything is okay now.” He tried to reassure the frightened ghost. “No, Logan. I'm—I'm killing you...” Patton gasped. Logan placed a cold hand against Patton's cold cheek and weakly smiled. “Then perhaps it's for the best if I die.” He whispered. Patton frantically shook his head. “No, you need to stay alive. Please, for me. It's not your time to go. You're still so young, my life was cut short, don't let me be the cause of your death.” He pleaded desperately.

“I can't live without you. Please Patton, don't let me suffer any longer. I'm afraid of facing the world alone. I can't go on any longer.” Logan's voice was now a low whisper. Patton felt a pain settle in his heart. It was new. He wasn't suppose to feel anything.

It took him a while to finally realize that it wasn't his pain. Due to him draining the life out of Logan he was able to now feel what he felt. And the pain was unbearable. So with teary eyes he sat by Logan who's life slowly faded away. “I love you so much...” Logan's hand dropped to his side. He didn't care if nobody found him afterwards, what mattered was him reuniting with the one he loved.

Before he shut his eyes, Patton hovered above him and placed his cold lips against his own right before he drifted off into a peaceful and deep slumber...

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Days passed, Logan was all over the news. People say his cause of death was suicide, others say he had heart problems, but that really didn't matter. Because up in the sky smiling and laughing were two young males. Both happy to finally be together.

Forever.