A/n: just put the baby cousin down for a nap so what better time to write a pissfic

Okay. Idk if UTI's can be caught through sex but let's pretend they can. Also while writing this I felt like going into detail about the SA earlier on would make more sense then pulling it out of nowhere in the end and everyone being like "😃 what where did that come from author are you crazy"

SOOOOOOOOOO that's what I did and I think I got carried away.

This one is for little_pupcup , thank you so much!

Someone give me a little space prompt or smth to make it up to the people who don't like angst. Here take a duck🐥🐥🐥

TRIGGER WARNING:

•Sexual assault/Rape

Remus gasped, running through the streets. Rain was pouring down and he was getting soaked—but he had to get away. He didn't care if his clothes were getting ruined or if he'd be sick from all the rainwater. He had to get away. Away from him.

He ran as fast as he could. He wasn't sure what he was doing or where he was going because he was wasted. He didn't even think he'd be able to remember any of this in the morning. And he was praying that would be the case.

Home. Get home.

He was panting heavily, his heart hammering in his chest so loudly that he almost wasn't able to hear the booming thunder. He was panicking so much that he didn't care to look up at the lightning crackling across the night sky, which would usually fascinate him.

It hurt. It hurt it hurt it hurt, his asshole hurt so bad. It burned so bad, why did the guy go so hard? Why didn't he at least prep him?

He was staggering, limping across the street as he ran.

He let out a broken sob. He was weak. He was pathetic for letting this happen to him. But he'd pushed him off, he'd told him no. But the music at the bar was just so loud, and nobody could hear him screaming, begging for help. It was dark, so dark in that closet, that he couldn't even see the man's face.

He wouldn't be able to tell anyone who the man that took advantage of him
was. The only way he'd be able to recognize him was by the rough hands that held him down, that wrapped around his throat until he couldn't breathe so that he would stop screaming.

Remus wouldn't recognize the face—but he'd always remember the voice. Rough and low, and trying so hard to get him to obey.

Remus whimpered, fumbling with the keys to his apartment, trying to swallow his sobs and stop his tears. He unlocked the door after a few failed attempts and bursted through the doors like the thunder that crackled above him.

He ran to his room, freezing, soaking wet, used—he had to he quiet. He couldn't face them. He couldn't face Roman and Patton. Not yet.

He ran to his room and slammed his door shut. He ripped his clothes off his body—or what was left of them. He'd been in such a rush to get away from that—that man that he hadn't even put his shoes or socks back on.

He grabbed a fresh set of clothes, the fluffiest, softest, most comfortable pajamas that he owned, as well as a big, fluffy towel and ran into the bathroom.

He closed the door, locked it and ran a stressed hand through his hair. He turned the shower onto the hottest possible setting and began to sob, breaking down and choking. He stared at himself in the mirror, at his naked body. He could feel every inch of his skin where he had been touched, grabbed, squeezed.

He was dirty, he was used, he was pathetic, he was weak—he—he needed to calm down!

He cringed at the feeling in his ass. He was going to be so sore. He rubbed his butt to make it feel better but the pain was deep, and—

He froze, feeling a thick wetness.

He pulled his hand away and looked at it. He began to shake.

Blood.

Okay. Okay okay okay. So, the guy had torn his asshole open. Fine, fine it was okay it would scab over and heal, right? It just needed some time.

He hopped into the shower and began to scrub the sins from his body, scrubbed every place where he could still feel the ghost of a touch, the touch of a man who didn't have consent.

————————————————————

Roman and Patton were worried.

Of course they were—Remus hadn't left his room in three days. They tried to coax him out. Tried to tell him they left food by his door. But they never even got a response. They didn't get a single sound. The only way they knew he was actually in there was because of the soft hiccups of sobs stifled by the pillows coming from his room at night.

He went to the bathroom very often—way more often than was usual. But every time he left his room and they saw his eyes they couldn't bare to speak to him. His eyes were bloodshot and he always had tears in them. His eye bags were sagging down to his cheeks, and his face was a deep shade of red, agitated from crying so much.

"Roman. We can't keep letting him self destruct like this" Patton whispered. They really didn't want Remus to know that they were talking about him, "he seems...sick? He's using the bathroom a lot. And I don't know if he's just not feeling well, or if something happened at that party to upset him. He's never quite like this."

Roman sighed, "you're right, I just—wanted to give him some time. He shakes so badly just walking to the bathroom, and won't meet our eyes or talk to us. He won't eat or drink, and I'm scared."

Patton chewed the inside of his cheek in thought, "we need to get him out. We need to actually try to talk to him instead of dancing around the subject."

Roman nodded, "how about we talk to him over dinner? I mean, if we can get him out, that is."

Patton smiled, "oooooh, yes! I'll make something good for us and lure him out with freshly baked cookies!"

"He might not be ready to talk yet if something happened" Roman frowned, "I want to give him some more time, but—i'm worried that he's never going to come to us on his own. His intrusive thoughts can get a lot for him. And as much as I like to pick on him for it, I know he can't control them."

Patton gave Roman a gentle smile, "Ro. I can tell that you really care about your brother" Roman's eyes widened and he opened his mouth, but Patton continued, "And before you say anything, I promise not to tell anybody you said all that" He chuckled, and Roman relaxed some.

"And I think you're right" Patton said after a moment, "we need to talk to him. And who knows? Maybe this is exactly what he needs. And hey, if everything turns out to be okay—if nothing happened at that party and he just got sick, then that would be great, but it will be worth talking about anyways."

"I can go get started on dinner" Roman offered.

Patton raised a brow in suspicion, "well that's a first."

Roman smirked, "well i'd rather be on cooking duty than cleaning duty."

"Oh, you jerk" Patton said, rolling his eyes playfully.

————————————————————

Remus stared at the ceiling bitterly, ignoring his rumbling stomach, his dry throat, and the sharp, annoying pangs that kept on bringing pain to his bladder. His kidneys felt sore, and he knew it would probably be beat to just go and pee, but he did not want to risk running into Roman or Patton. Besides, he had already went so many times today with barely any results.

He was beginning to realize that he might have a UTI, and being dehydrated probably wasn't helping with that. If anything, he needed water to flush his system out. The dribbles of pee he was releasing in the bathroom were sharp and painful. They felt like fire and acid leaking out to burn him.

He thought for a moment, angrily, id he contracted the UTI from that horrible man. That was when it started, the very next day. After that night.

He hated himself. Everything about him. He could never keep a boyfriend, but he could always manage to find someone who would lie to him, who would use him for sex.

Nobody has actually ever kept going once he told them to stop. Usually he allowed himself to feel pressured into it—to grow to like it because it just felt so good to feel loved in that moment.

But this man, who he had never met, never seen before, he—he came out of nowhere. He shoved Remus into that closet, he shoved him against the wall for a sloppy kiss before forcing him onto the ground.

Remus liked to think he did everything he could. He kicked and screamed and cried, but over the sound of drunk people screaming and the blearing music he wasn't heard. He went still, silent, emotionless when the man finally did more than just kiss or touch him.

When he entered him.

And even after begging for him to stop, he kept going, and he kept going and going and going until Remus was sobbing in pain and fear. That had never happened before, and it was just so scary, to be taken advantage of and not know if he was actually going to be allowed to live afterwards or not.

And his butt still hurt. He could barely even walk to the bathroom, because anytime his legs spread too much he bled again. It was really painful.

His thoughts were interrupted by a tiny knock at the door. He let out a harsh breath, but didn't respond.

"Remus?"

It was Roman.

He couldn't ever let Roman know what had happened. How do you look your brother in the eyes and tell him you've been used in such a horrible, demeaning way? You just didn't.

"Remus, I know you're in there..." Roman said, his voice gentle, "it's me. It's just me. Can you please let me in and we can talk?"

Remus placed a firm hand over his mouth to keep his sobs from escaping. Tears ran down his cheeks and slipped between his fingers. Roman would be so disappointed, so disgusted if he knew how weak and pathetic Remus had been.

Maybe it was Remus's fault. He had been wearing that scandalous outfit. Yes, to attract some attention, but also just so that he could feel sexy. He shouldn't have worn that. Maybe if he hadn't put himself on display like that, he wouldn't have been—

"That's okay. You don't have to talk yet, I just—i'm worried about you."

He heard Roman's voice crack and it took all of his willpower to not throw the door open and embrace his brother. To be comforted by his strong arms while he cried.

"I made dinner" Roman said, his voice quiet, "shocking, I know" he chuckled, "but even I can pull off spaghetti and meatballs."

Remus smiled a little bit.

"We've got you a plate on the table, if you'd like to come and join us" Roman offered.

Remus stayed silent for several seconds and hears Roman sigh, probably about to walk away.

He bit his lip and thought for a moment before he said quietly, "i'll be there."

He wasn't sure if Roman heard or not, but there was a pause. Then he heard footsteps walking in the other direction.

He rolled his eyes when he hears a high pitched scream, "Patton, he's coming!"

Remus let out a soft groan, hauling himself up out of bed. It was dark in his room, and had been for a few days now, so when he opened his door he almost screamed at how bright it was, but he simply just kept walking towards the kitchen as normally as he could with a UTI and a broken butt.

Remus came through the door and the other two froze.

"Uh. Hi" Remus said awkwardly, his voice rough and scratchy.

"Oh my goodness" Patton said, "come, quickly, sit down you look horrible! Here, let me get you some water, you sound dehydrated."

Remus nodded and took his seat, staring down at his food. His mouth watered when the wonderful smell his his nostrils. He was so hungry.

Patton put a large glass down in front of Remus, "try to drink this. And eat something, okay?"

Remus nodded, taking a small sip from his glass, before chugging it down completely in just a few gulps. He was thirsty.

"Uh, wow" Roman chuckled, "thirsty much?"

Remus nodded.

"I'll get you some more" Patton chuckled.

Remus nodded, staring at the food as his stomach growled. He ate his food much slower than he drank his water, not keen on throwing up later.

When Patton returned with his water he took slower sips. They all ate in silence for a while before Patton spoke up, "so...Remus. How are you feeling today?"

"Good" Remus said. You know, like a liar.

"Oh, that's...good" Patton muttered, before looking to Roman for help.

Roman sighed, "okay. I'm going to be blunt. Did something happen at the party?"

Remus choked on his water, coughing loudly.

"You okay?!" Patton asked, worriedly.

"Noth—thing hap-p-pened!" He got out between harsh, dry coughs.

Once he recovered he let out a sigh, and dared to look up at the others. They did not look convinced in the slightest.

"Remus" Patton said.

"No. I'm fine" Remus said harshly, "everything is fine, Patton."

"No. It isn't" Patton said, his voice gentle, his eyes soft, "tell us, please. Is something wrong?"

And that set something off in Remus, how kind he was being. How reassuring they both acted towards him. They were being so nice.

"Patton, just stop!" Remus snapped, standing up harshly. The chair's legs squeaked loudly against the tile floor, "you're always just being—being soooooooo nice, so empathetic to everybody you know! But you don't know shit about what i'm going through right now!"

Roman and Patton stared at each other in complete and utter shock. Remus had never yelled at Patton before.

"R-Remus" Patton stuttered, "I think you're tired. You look exhausted, have you been sleeping?"

That made Remus even more angry. Why was Patton still being nice?! Why wasn't he angry?!

Truth be told, Remus had barely slept at all. And the sleep he did have was plagued with horrible nightmares, vivid flashbacks on what had happened to him.

"Just stop!" He boomed, "you are just so—I—why don't you hate me?!"

Remus's eyes filled with tears. He felt them spill down his cheeks, and his eyes widened. He covered his eyes with his arm, spun on his heel and ran back to his room. He was weak. Weak weak weak.

"Remus, wait!" Roman cried, "please, can you just calm down?" He stood up, "can we just talk?!"

Remus's door slammed and they heard faint sobs come from inside. That was his answer.

Patton wrapped his arms around Roman's shoulders, "it's going to be okay."

————————————————————

Remus felt horrible.

It hadn't even been thirty minutes later, but his anger had faded and been completely replaced by guilt. Maybe Patton was right. Maybe he needed some rest.

He just needed to fall asleep, and everything would be okay.

He laid down and wrapped himself in his blanket. He closed his eyes and tried to relax. He fell asleep and was brought into nightmare realm.

He stayed asleep for maybe two hours before he jolted awake with a scream and began to cry, "get off, get off get off get off! Stop—no, please, just STOP!" He began to hyperventilate, gasping for air. It was dark—dark dark dark just like the closet. He turned his beside lamp on and began to relax. He was in his room. His room was safe.

He took a deep breath, trying to slow his heart-rate.

He laid back down, closing his eyes. He listened for a moment to make sure he hadn't alerted Patton or Roman. Suddenly, his eyes shot wide open. He felt something warm and wet.

He peeled his blankets off and groaned. He had wet the bed. Of course he had—he drank two large glasses of water when he had a bladder infection and then hadn't peed before bed. He was so stupid.

He got up, hating the way his cold urine made his clothes stick to his body. He assumed he'd wet his bed in the middle of the night and not in his panic since it wasn't warm.

He checked the time. It was three in the morning.

He stripped his bed of his sheets and blankets and took his clothes off. He put a robe around his body so that he didn't have to see himself and then put all of the clothes and sheets into the washing machine. Then, he grabbed a towel and headed towards the bathroom for the first shower he's had in three days.

He took a long time under the water's hot spray, knowing he wasn't going to be able to head back to sleep anytime
soon.

————————————————————

He took a few more days to wallow in guilt and self pity before he decided that he really didn't want Patton to hate him. He probably made the other really upset with him. Hurting Patton's feelings was a jerk move that he didn't want to leave unresolved.

So, he climbed out of bed again and stood in front of his locked door, trying to build up the courage to go and apologize.

He turned his light on for the first time in almost a week and walked over to his vanity. He looked in the mirror and cringed. He looked...not good. No wonder Patton was worried.

"I can do this" he whispered, "just go out there and apologize. Just tell him you're sorry. Go, go go."

He was horrible at giving himself pep talks, but he was able to open his door and step out. He could hear Roman and Patton talking quietly amongst themselves.

"He said I couldn't understand what he was going through" he heard Patton's quiet mumble, "that has to mean that something did happen. Right?"

Roman sighed, "Remus is Remus. We may never figure it out. But i'm just so worried—he's never exploded quite like that before, and he's never yelled at you—"

Remus stepped into the room.

"Shh shh shhh!" Patton said, smacking Roman on the shoulder a couple of times. He pointed in the doorway.

Roman's eyes widened, "Remus!"

"I'm sorry" he said, ignoring Roman. He shuffled closer to Patton, "I didn't...I didn't mean to sound so harsh the other day. Or. Maybe I did. Maybe I just wanted to get my anger out. But either way, I shouldn't have taken it out on you when you were only trying to help. I'm sorry, Patton."

Patton had tears in his eyes, and Remus cursed himself internally. His feelings were still hurt. You made him mad. Can you do anything right?! I—

"Awe! Remus!" Patton cried, "thank you so much—apology accepted!" He giggled, "oh, I know that was hard for you" he wiped his eyes, "that was so sweet!"

Remus had never been more confused in his life, but he couldn't help but smile.

"Hey. I know the past several days have been pretty stressful for you, Remus. Heck, for all of us—I think that we should get together and do something" Roman suggested.

"Movie night!" Remus blurted. He didn't really want to actually do anything. If they had a movie night they could spend quiet time together in the dark.

"Ooooh, great idea!" Patton encouraged, "what should we watch?"

And Remus wanted to be close together with them as long as he could. They were comforting and safe. He thought for a moment. What movie was super long that both Patton and Roman would enjoy?

"...The Titanic?" He questioned.

"Oh, a classic!" Roman exclaimed, "I haven't seen that movie in years."

"Definitely. Oh, how about we do this tonight? I'm sure we have the dvd somewhere, you know how Roman's a collector" Patton smiled.

Remus nodded, thinking for a moment that Patton smiled way too much. But he didn't want to say anything to burst his bubble because he was pretty sure he had some serious depression or something underneath.

————————————————————

Remus got settled onto the couch, sandwiched between Roman and Patton. The beginning of the movie played from the tv screen and the lights were dimmed per Remus's request.

He slammed his head onto Roman's shoulder, "cuddle" he mumbled.

Roman rolled his eyes and opened his arms so that Remus's head was on his chest and his arm around his shoulders. Remus sighed in content. Roman really had no clue how much the comforting position was helping him. He felt like nothing would be able to hurt him because Roman would always protect him.

He stayed in that position for a while, and eventually even dozed off. He jolted awake about an hour and a half later when he felt a painful stab in his bladder. He sighed lowly, the burning sensation back. He had to pee really bad, but every time he moved it hurt. There was no way he would be able to walk to the bathroom. He couldn't even pry his legs apart.

He squeezed his thighs together in an attempt to quell his desperation.

He tried to pay attention to the movie and ignore the painful pressure in his bladder, but he never really did have a good attention span, and the pain was getting to be a lot more than he could handle.

He teared up at another spike of pain and crossed his legs tightly, burying his head in Roman's chest. He sniffled a little bit as tears ran down his cheeks.

Patton sniffled a little too and chuckled, "awe ya big softie, I swore I wasn't going to cry at this part!"

Roman chuckled, "oh, I knew we were all going to cry" he wiped his eyes, "it's just—so sad because you know what happens later."

Remus let out a shaky breath, almost admiring how dumb his brother and his friend were. He was sure Roman could feel him shaking. But he probably wasn't saying anything because he knew that there was a tension in the room, being that neither of them knew what was wrong with Remus.

Another thirty minutes passed and Remus thought he was going to be able to wait longer. He was a grown adult after all, there was no reason that he wouldn't be able to hold it until the end of a movie.

But it just hurt so bad. And his bladder was just so sore and weak from the abuse it's been through the past week. Remus couldn't even move because of how badly it was hurting him to release. Before he knew it, his acid-like dribbles and spurts became long, white hot leaks that felt like flames.

He cried out in pain and put a hand between his legs. He was wetting himself in front of Patton and Roman. He was humiliated.

He was humiliated, and he wasn't even feeling any relief. He had a constant, harsh spray going into his pants now and it didn't feel like he was emptying, it just felt like he was filling with fire.

"Ow! Ow ow ow! It hurt—it hurts so bad!" He moaned, throwing his head back and slapping his hands over his face.

That certainly got the attention of Patton, who paused the tv and turned the lights on, "what?! What hurts, Remus are you ok?!"

Roman's eyes were wide as he stared at his brother, who was in extreme distress. He certainly noticed the dark stain forming around Remus's groin, but he didn't care, just holding Remus tighter, "hey, hey it's okay. It's alright. Calm down, calm down..." he shushed Remus and looked up at Patton. He could tell the man's heart was breaking watching this occur.

"I'm sorry, i'm so so sorry Roman, I—it, it's getting all over you, i'm so gross and disgusting, why are you holding me? Why don't you hate me? Why does it hurt so ba—bad, ouch" he cried out, sighing deeply when he finally finished. But he felt even worse than when he started. Everything hurt.

"Hey, Remus" Roman said, "look at me."

Remus rested his chin on Roman's chest, looking up at him with wide, tearful eyes, his cheeks dusted a light shade of pink.

"Yeah. That's it. Don't feel bad. Just breathe. Everything will be okay. I promise. I don't care that i'm a little messy. I'm your brother, i'm used to wearing your piss like it's the latest trend in fashion" he flipped his bangs for a a little bit of humor.

Remus giggled, but cringed when he got a stab of pain.

"Now. Can you tell me what hurts? Please?" Roman asked.

"Peen. Bladder. Kidneys. All of it" he mumbled.

"What does the pain feel like?" Patton asked.

"Stabbing. Cramping. Burning. Hot knives."

"Sounds like some type of bladder infection" Patton frowned.

And Remus knew that. Obviously. But he didn't feel like getting chewed out.

"Okay" he settled with.

"We need to get you to a doctor. You need a diagnosis just in case it's something more serious. And you need antibiotics" Patton said.

"N—now?" Remus asked.

"Um. Yes now! You're in a lot of pain" Patton told him.

"Uh. Patton. He needs to get changed. And quite frankly, I do too" Roman chuckled.

"Oh. Right" Patton said, "okay—well, i'll clean the mess then. I'm going to go get cleaning supplies."

As Patton rushed off, Remus whimpered, "I don't like doctors."

"I know, Remus. But they're going to help you. I promise. Why don't you go rinse off really quickly?" Roman asked.

Remus nodded, trying to get up but hissing, "ouch."

"You okay?" Roman asked.

"Yep. Just....hurts to walk" Remus whispered.

"Does your...butt hurt?" Roman asked, "you're walking really weird. And..I also noticed the limp the other day at dinner."

Remus panicked for a moment. He was not going down like this. What was he supposed to say? Oh yeah, I was raped the other day. I'm pretty sure the guy tore my ass in half but i'm fine

"I took a massive dump earlier" Remus said quickly, before running into the bathroom and slamming the door. Really, Remus? He might as well start a class on how to NOT seem convincing in the slightest.

All she wanted to do was submerge himself in a nice, hot relaxing bath but it would probably burn his butthole, and Patton was serious about the doctor so he did a quick, painful rinse and went on with his life. He got dressed and met the others at the door.

"I think we should go to the ER. He really can barely walk right now" Roman frowned.

"Okay. Yeah, I think that may be the only think open at this time anyways" Patton said, "let's get in the car and go."

————————————————————
 
After a painful hour of waiting and several more bathroom breaks for Remus, the doctors finally called his name.

Patton and Roman helped him limp into the room and the doctors began to question them.

"We have concerns for a UTI" Roman said, "and...pain in his butt. I don't think he's being completely honest with us. All of this started after a party he went to last week. I feel like something happened there."

Remus blushed.

"Okay. I'll see what I can find. You two wait here. Remus, come with me."

————————————————————

When the doctor came back in the room with a grim look on his face thirty minutes later without Remus, both of them were worried.

"I have some bad news" he said.

"What?" Patton asked.

"Remus does have a UTI, and a very bad tear in his buttox. After a little bit of prying, we have been informed that Remus has been...taken advantage of. He asked me to tell you while the nurse talks to him."

Roman froze in his spot, staring at the doctor. He heard a gasp from Patton.

"He was raped in a dark closet by a man he can only identify by voice. I'm so sorry, this must be quite a shock. I advise getting the police involved. We're checking him for STD's right now" the doctor informed.

Patton put a hand over his mouth as tears ran down his cheeks, and Roman'a eyes darkened. He felt a red hot anger consume him. His brother...

His brother had been hurt. While drunk at a party.

"We need to talk to everybody who was at that party and see if we can find him" Patton said.

Just then, there was a knock at the door. The nurse came in with Remus, and she ushered the doctor out, "we will be back shortly."

Remus stared at his feet, tears running down his cheeks, "I'm sorry."

"Don't" Roman cut off, "don't you dare apologize."

"Remus...why didn't you tell us?" Patton asked, heartbroken.

And where was Remus even supposed to begin? He was humiliated, he was used, he felt so dirty—like it was all his fault. His feelings were complex. Far, far too complex to explain.

"I don't—I don't know, I just didn't want you guys to think less of me" he said quietly.

"Remus. I don't know what's been running through your mind, but we love you. We love you so, so much" Roman said, "and if someone hurts you. If someone does anything to make you uncomfortable in any way, we need you to tell us. Because we will always help you, no matter what."

"Yeah" Patton said, "and right now, we're going to help you find this man. And we're going to get him locked up."

"I don't want him to hurt anyone else" Remus whispered, "it was...horrible. I felt so scared and alone. And it hurt so bad."

"We won't let him get away with this. We are going to the police as soon as we leave this station. Now, I need you to tell us what bar this party was at and whose party it was" Roman said.

"T-the bar next to the uhm. That university and it was Remy's party" Remus whispered.

"Okay. We can call him and let him know what happened—"

"No!" Remus yelled, "we can't tell anyone! This is so humiliating, I don't want anybody else to know..."

"Remus. A lot of people are going to find out, especially once the police get involved. And if Remy knows this will all go by a lot faster. Remy knows everyone" Roman explained, "please. Let us help you."

  And Roman knew his tone was a little aggressive, but he just couldn't help it. He was going to punch a hole in the wall if he didn't go outside and scream, but with how tightly Remus was holding his hand, he didn't want to leave him alone.

"Okay. Okay, you're right" Remus confessed, "thank you guys for helping..."

A/n:Pretty sure I may have went off prompt,,maybe a little,,,or a lot depending on what you envisioned,,,so sorry

Still don't know to vs. too

Also if you had something else in mind for a part two like healing/recovery or something. Hit me up😂

Word count: You'll never know.