A/n: Heyyyy

So uh,, sorry for not writing for a while 😭😭i've been busy irl for once in my life. Still babysitting the boys, but aside from that I had family stuff to do and more church camps so hopefully i'll get back to updating a little more frequently.

Also band camp starts on the 18th for me,, so uh lmao sorry

Band camp is from like 8am to 6 or 7 pm from July 18-30 I think so if i'm not absolutely dying of dehydration, exhaustion, sunburn, and heat stroke, then i'll work on chapters at night time during those two weeks and try to get them out lol

For _lokii_

The first time it happened, they had been new roommates. New boyfriends as well, living together in a dorm for school. Remus and Janus decided that they might as well live together since they were boyfriends anyways.

But Janus quickly noticed that Remus had a little bit of a..well, a little bit of a problem. It had been less than a week of them living together when Janus walked into the common area after hearing a string of curses exit Remus.

He was kind of shocked at what he saw but at the same time, he found him masturbating in his parent's bed while they were in the shower less than a month ago so nothing really phases him anymore. Plus, Remus looked more annoyed than upset so that was a good thing.

Still, he approached the situation with caution, "Remus..what happened?" Janus asked slowly, inching forward towards his boyfriend.

"Ugh" Remus groaned, covering his face, "I just—this is so—okay, i'm so sorry, Jan I didn't even realize until it was happening. I'm just so used to it by now."

"Used to it, what do you mean? How often does this happen?" Janus asked. Did Remus have incontinence or something?

"I mean—I used to uh, be too lazy to get up and go so i'd just..y'know, go there and then clean up later when I was done with what I was doing, y'know?" Remus admitted.

"No, Remus, I don't know, what?! How is that easier than going to the bathroom?" Janus asked, groaning, "you are impossible! Honestly, what? Like—bruh. That's literally all I have to say. I have never once in my life said bruh but you bring out the worst in me."

"You still love me though" Remus smirked.

"I'm not so sure I do" Janus said, his tone teasing as he shrugged, "wait—did you do this on purpose?!"

"No, I don't do it on purpose anymore! My body's just used to letting go by now. I literally wet myself at the store the other day" Remus pouted, "teenagers were laughing at me. Teenagers are ruthless. I was one not long ago!" He exclaimed.

"You're worse then any teenager I know" Janus scoffed, "come on, let's get this mess cleaned up."

————————————————————

"Remus. This is ridiculous" Janus sighed, "it's impossible for any human to be this lazy! You need to stop what you're doing and just go to the bathroom when you have to go, or so help me I will put you in diapers."

"Jannnnn" Remus whined, "Janny, i'm sorry..i've just been doing it so long that like, i'm pretty sure my body automatically just lets go wherever I am at this point. I'm trying to be less lazy but it just like, slips my mind and I just go!"

Janus sighed, "I know all of this Remus, and I know you're trying, but honestly? We've been doing this for six months now and we need to find a solution for you."

Remus nodded, "okayyyyyyy finee i'll try harder to not be lazy" he sighed, "oh, by the way, when are your stupid little plants getting here?"

Janus scoffed, "stupid?! Plants will make the room look more lively! And make it look like you've got more taste. Plants are very pleasing to look at."

Remus sighed, "I don't know what I see in you."

"I feel like I have more of a right to say that then you do" Janus smirked, "pissy pants."

Remus gasped, "You're a butthole!"

"And you're a baby, now come on Remus, we need to get some stuff done. After we clean up this mess" Janus said, "go change."

————————————————————

"You know, that's kinda gay" Remus said as Janus began to put the house plants in various different spots.

Janus scoffed, "we're both gay, how is this an insult?" He asked as he put a potted flower on Remus's windowsill.

"Why does my room need plants too? I don't care about that kinda stuff!" He exclaimed, throwing his head back dramatically and crossing his arms, "just let me play among us in peace!"

Janus placed a few potted plants around the room, one rather large one next to his computer desk, one by his tv, and one by his bedside table.

"I'm not watering those" Remus said.

"They're fake, you think I would trust you with anything real? The soil can still soak up liquids though, so to teach you some responsibility, you will be watering them" Janus said, "or i'll start spraying you with water like you're a dog."

"Actually I kinda like that idea—"

"Remus! Ugh—you are absolutely impossible! I'm going to go and make some lunch, just, for the love of god, don't do anything weird" Janus said with a sigh, walking out of the room.

———————————————————-

How foolish Janus was to trust Remus alone. Almost ten minutes after he left Remus felt the need to pee. As usual, he didn't feel like getting up to go. He was about to do what he usually did when he noticed the plants out of the corner of his eye.

He shrugged to himself, because why not? Remus scooted his rolling chair over to the nearby plant and whipped himself out, aiming for the dirt in the pot, and releasing. He sighed in relief, watching as his piss pooled around the plant, slowly soaking into the dirt. Huh, no mess. Convenient.

When he finished, he put himself away and got back to his game, barely noticing when Janus came in and checked his plants.

"Did you water this one?" Janus asked.

Remus nearly jumped out of his skin, "w-what?"

"The soil. It's damp. Did you water it?"

He watched in horror as Janus touched the spoil and small beads of his piss came out of it and stayed on Janus's finger tips, "yea!" He blurted, "yeah—yeah, I like that one."

Janus raised a suspicious brow, before humming, "see? I told you it would be nice to have some plants. Now come eat, and stop sitting so close to your computer screen, you'll ruin your eyes."

————————————————————

Janus was growing quite suspicious. Ever since he'd bought those plants, Remus's accidents had decreased dramatically. And by dramatically, Janus meant they literally only happened like once every week, if that.

When he'd asked Remus about it, he was told by the rat man, 'I just wanted to take action. I started setting alarms as reminders, and breaks between what I'm doing.'

And that was very out of character fir Remus, so Janus was calling bull, assuming that he was simply cleaning up after himself. Though upon further examination, he found that wasn't the case. He genuinely wasn't wetting himself anymore.

"Okay Remus, what's the deal?" Janus asked after a while, "how did you do this? It happened so suddenly!"

"What?" Remus asked through bites of deodorant and frantic clicks of his computer mouse.

"Don't act dumb with me!" Janus exclaimed.

"You literally just said that out of nowhere! How the hell am I supposed to know about your internal debate on my stupidity?!" Remus defended.

"Oh, right" Janus said, "I'm talking about the accidents."

"How can you call them accidents? I was doing it on purpose" Remus shrugged.

"What?! You said that it used to be on purpose! You told me that your body was just used to it so it went or something!" Janus exclaimed.

"I mean, yeah but also on purpose" Remus admitted.

"I'm literally going to break up with you oh my goodness—okay, just..be honest, how did you stop doing it so quick? You just stopped being lazy?" Janus asked.

"Oh, no I just um..what I said before, y'know? Wanted to take initiative. Why are you still questioning me?" Remus asked defensively.

"You know what, fine. Keep your secrets" Janus scoffed, laying down on Remus's bed face down, before pulling out his phone and propping himself up in a pillow, "but i'm watching you."

"Yeah, and you'll watch me get up and go to the bathroom like a big boy, too" Remus said, "you doubt me too much."

"I have very valid reasons to doubt you!" Janus hissed.

————————————————————

Remus felt it again about two hours later—the need to pee. His routine was so common at this point that he barely even looked up from his game, one hand still on the mouse as he unhooked his and unzipped his fly, and took himself out with the other.

He immediately began to do a trick shot from his chair to the plant a few feet away, as he sighed in relief.

"REMUS WHAT THE HELL?!"

Remus jumped, his stream faltering as he leaked a little on the ground. Oops. He'd forgotten about Janus..

He let out a quick string of curses as he tried to regain control for a moment to readjust himself. He continued to go until he finished, and then he simply put himself away and stared back at the horrified Janus, "what?" He asked blankly.

Janus's jaw dropped to the floor, "what? WHAT?! YOU LITERALLY JUST PISSED IN A PLANT BECAUSE YOUR TRASH DEMON ASS WAA TOO LAZY TO PAUSE YOUR GAME AND GO TO THE BATHROOM ???"

"Hey, it's convenient! Don't knock it 'till you try it!" Remus pouted, giving Janus puppy dog eyes, "don't he mad..pweeeaassse?"

"Any other person would say 'how can I be mad at that' from their boyfriend, but because your ass is ugly as hell, i'm still upset. Your accidents only stopped because you were pissing in the plants, didn't they?!" Janus exclaimed.

Remus simply nodded, before getting back to his game.

"And you have the audacity to not even be embarrassed?" Janus asked, shaking his head, "you're something else."

"Yeah, something you love!" Remus exclaimed, giving Janus a peck on the cheek.

"Are we seriously going to act like you didn't just piss on the plant?" Janus asked.

Remus smirked, "I mean, we don't have to, but let's acknowledge the fact that when you came to see id they were watered or not, you were feeling my piss."

"..I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"

————————————————————

Janus sighed from where he sat, jiggling his leg at least eighth miles per hour. He had been on a work call forever and he was in dire need of a break. But he couldn't just leave, they
were were doing important stuff!

His bosses voice was just background noise at this point as Janus searched for a solution. He knew Remus wouldn't care—he had them all the time! But still, he was not going to wet himself. Remus would be merciless in his teasing if he found out.

So, he crossed his legs and nodded along with the meeting, not really retaining any of the information. He bit the inside of his cheek hard enough to notice when he tasted iron in his mouth. He glanced around the room, eyes falling to a pretty decent sized potted plant next to him.

He blushed. He had told Remus off for doing literally the exact same thing not days before. But he wasn't doing it because he was being lazy! He was desperate and he couldn't just leave the call. It was okay to do it, just this once, right?

Janus didn't have time for the internal debate though, because he felt a leak dribble into his boxers, so he made his decision quick. He swiped the plant from beside him and put it in front of him under his desk. He muted his mic and made quick work of pulling himself out to go.

He whimpered a little as he finally let go, trying to keep his face neutral as he stared down at the piss rushing out of him and splattering into the plant's dirt. He barely stopped himself in time to allow the quickly pooling liquid a chance to soak into the soil before it started to spill down the sides.

He taped his foot impatiently as the piss slowly seeped deeper into the pot. When it went down enough, he let out a sigh of relief as he let go with extreme force, shoulders drooping as he let out a shudder. He continued to go until he was finished, and with a red face, tucked himself away and put the plant back, getting back to his meeting.

Huh. Maybe Remus was right. It was terribly convenient.

He would definitely be doing this more often.

A/N: CEO of not worth the wait, sorry💀

This may seem disconnected at some parts and the dialogue might seem forced but I wrote almost all of it like a week or two ago on varying different days and then some more yesterday and today and I didn't reread what I wrote bc idk why so lol🕺🕺🕺🕺