The pic is just how I believe the American and British governments are dealing with just anything bad that has ever happened ever.

Enjoy

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(Janus is the mom friend and there is no way anyones changing my mind)
Patton: *Walks into the room with a bin bag* Just a reminder that tomorrow is trash day
Virgil: *Stands up, walks towards Remus and effortlessly lifts him up* Common we're going to wait of the bin men since you're the trashman and I'm just a piece of trash
Janus: Virgil put Remus down and sit back down you're not going anywhere
Patton: Thank you Janus
Janus: I don't want either of you to get a cold when it rains tonight. Go out in the morning

(It's the morning and Patton and Janus are talking over the phone, Janus had the twins and Patton has the left brain bois {Logan and Virgil})
Patton: I think we're going to have to limit Virgil's time at your place
Janus: Why?
Patton: Your kids are teaching him pop culture phrases and they're kind of-
Virgil: *Bursts into Patton's room* Rise and grind my dudes, let's eat today's ass!

Roman: You can't be a princess if you don't have a tragic backstory
Patton: Does someone else eating my pizza count?
Roman: How are you not a royalty already?!
Virgil: I've lost my will to live. Is that dramatic enough?

(Logan didn't want to participate because he never leaves the house unless extremely necessary and said that the logistics of him getting 'mugged' are exponentially low)
Patton: Okay Kiddos, of self-defence reasons, I'm going to pretend to be a robber and you have to defend yourselves
Roman: Alright
Virgil: Sure
Patton: *Pulls a ski mask over his face and holds up a butter knife* If you want to live, give me all your money!
Roman: Bold of you to assume I have money
Virgil: Bold of you to assume I want to live.
Patton: *Worried Patton noises*
(Because comedy Logan got mugged the next time he was out)

(I've done my best to explain this cuz its a picture instead of words)
Virgil: If you love me let me-
Roman: *Holding Virgil back* Don't you dare
Virgil: Gooooooooo!!
(They are standing outside a HOT TOPIC with a 20% off deal)

Virgil: Consider this, Seatbelts. Except they throw you out of your seat, and they're called Yeetbelts.
Logan: *Whispers under his breath as he vigorously searches through his flashcards* What the fuck is a 'Yeet'

Virgil: So, Let me get this straight-
Roman: More like Let me run this bi you (me)
Patton: Let's just see how this pans out.
Logan: We should ace-ass the situation.
Thomas: I'm gay
Patton: *Looking to Logan* You made a dad joke *starts to Squeal*
Logan: NO stop. It wasn't on purpose

(Attempted logince)
Roman: *Hitting on Logan* I believe Thomas is a thief, Because he's stolen all the star in the night sky and put them in your eyes
Logan: Impossible, Considering the size of just one star, how many there are in the sky, and the fact that the heat from a single star would melt the skin off Thomas' bones before he got close enough to touch it. (Logan's version of a shut down)

(Analogical)
Logan: I'm going out, I'll be back at 4pm! *leaves*
Virgil: One o'clock I'll be okay, I can do this!
Two o'clock - I can't do this!
Three o'clock - What if he forgot about me!? What if something happened!? And he's never coming back! *At this point he's pacing back a forth in the living room*
Three Fifty-nine pm - I'm okay! I'm a strong, independent smol! I've got this!
Four o'clock on the dot
Logan: I'm back!
Virgil: *Tackle hugs him in the doorway* Thank god I was so worried something had happened.

(Demus)
Remus: *Kisses Janus on the cheek*
Janus: What was that?
Remus: Affection??
Janus: Disgusting
Remus: *Sad puppy face and goes to move away*
Janus: *Grabs Remus*
Janus: *Mumbles*Do it again

Virgil: Fight me!
Roman: Ha! Look at you, your tiny what are you gonna do? Kick me in the ankle?
*Later*
Patton: Umm...Why is Roman quivering on the ground and crying?
Logan: Virgil kicked him in the ankle.
Patton: So why didn't you stop him?
Logan: Because he made fun at Virgil's short stature and gave him the idea of kicking him in the ankle and so ultimately brought this upon himself.

(Satan came to visit the sides one day and decided that Logan would be the easiest to tempt because Patton is too pure, They have a warrant on Virgil, Remus [and by association] Janus even though he didn't do anything just didn't stop them, Roman on the other hand would just try to draw inspiration from them so they weren't even going to try) (This is the storyline I'm going with just roll with it)
Satan: I've come to make a deal with you Logan. You can have anything you wan-
Logan: language.
Satan: What?
Logan: Give me use and understanding of every language including idioms and slang.
Satan: What the-?
Logan: You said anything. Give me every language in the world.
Satan: Wouldn't you rather have, like, love or fame or money-
Logan: MASTERY. OF. EVERY. LANGUAGE. EVER. NOW.

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I hope you've enjoyed this. Stay safe still Beauties, Gentle beauties and Non-Binary Cuties