Tw: panic attacks

Caregiver! Janus

Little! Virgil

(Yes Virgil is a bit soft- but some littles act completely different in little space then big space. Even so, I try to keep them in character but I wanted soft Virgil, so that's what you get.)

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It had happened so fast. Virgil had his head in his hands, a hoodie covering his body all the way down to his thighs, thoughts swirling like a tornado in his head, eyes glossing over. Suddenly, he couldn't breathe. He felt like he was lost at sea.

His bedroom felt like the ocean, waves crashed over him and he felt his throat closing, choking and wheezing, as if he had swallowed mouthfuls of water. His body trembled, his nails dug into his hoodies as he dropped his hands to wrap around himself, tears flowing rapidly down his cheeks, mixing with his makeup, making his tears appear black and muddy.

He didn't realize it, but he was screaming. Screaming for help out of this endless feeling of as if waves were smothering him, forcing him under the saltwater, air refused to fill his lungs and he felt lightheaded.

Then, he felt hands on his shoulders. He flinched, though, the hands kept his trembling body steady. A hand swiped under his chin, gripping at it gently and honey eyes met green ones.

"Virgil," His caregiver whispers. Virgil continues his frantic breathing, hands harshly gripping at the other's shirt.

"I want you to tell me five things you can see little one."

The voice alone felt warm in the cold water, he felt as if a lifeboat was floating near him. He swallowed harshly and let out another harsh sob. "Y-You..."

"Right, four more." Janus encourages, managing to get him in his lap, ignoring the other's soaked pants.

"Wall..."

"Three more bat."

Virgil hiccupped, his body trembling unnaturally quick, tears still running down his face as he cried, his throat turning sore.

"H-Hat..." He chokes. Janus lightly bounces him, nodding a bit.

"That's right buddy, my hat. You're doing so well. Two more."

Virgil sniffles and shifts, only crying further as he finally felt the wetness rubbing up against him. "I-I'm sorry!'

"Shh baby, it doesn't matter. Just an accident. Two more baby bat, c'mon." Janus encourages, rubbing at his back as he cried.

"P-Posters...phone..."

"That's it, four things you can feel."

Virgil sniffles, breathing beginning to slow slightly. "Shirt," He whimpers, voice wavering.

"Yes baby, my shirt, keep going." Came his soft voice as he holds him close, cradling and bouncing him.

"Daddy...hoodie...and-" He choked a little and sniffled. "Bad. Feel bad."

Janus sighed softly and gently swiped his thumb across his cheek. "Three things you can Hear."

"You...m-my breathing." He mumbles. "And you're heartbeat." He whispers, his ear pressed against his chest, the soft pattern of Janus' heartbeat had his tears slowing, his breathing beginning to come to a close.

"Two things you can smell?"

"Vanilla," He says, sniffling a bit. "And the forest. I like your cologne." He mumbles, nuzzling at his chest. Janus blushed a bit and coughed softly.

"Very good baby, now, one thing you can taste?"

"Mac and cheese." He mumbles, it having been their lunch.

Janus chuckles softly and holds his baby in a close, protective hold. "Yummy," He comments, handing him his favorite bat stuffie. Virgil hugs it close and sniffles, nuzzling at it.

"Sorry." He mumbles.

"Don't be sorry baby bat, now how about a nice bubble bath?"

"With lavender?"

"With lavender."