Elijah Baker

I had a headache.

The same headache I'd been having for days and would temporarily leave, only to come back and start stomping my head.

It wasn't a concussion. It was stress. I couldn't figure out how to make my life simple without killing everybody. Being logical is what kept you from getting caught. That wasn't logical.

I didn't know what to do.

At one point and time, Lauren and Marc had an okay marriage. It wasn't great, but it wasn't like this so maybe that's what she was holding on to. The disrespect continued to increase, now we made it to some intolerable shit.

Intolerable to me at least. Lauren seemed fine with it.

"I don't want what happened last week to happen again." She was staring past me and at the wall.

"Really ain't tryna hear the explanation."

Lauren wanted to explain though, "And he can't move around that well. It makes sense Eli."

"Okay."

She nodded and continued putting stuff in bags. Packing so easily like she knew it was only a matter of time that she went back.

Wasted everybody time for nothing. 'Cause Lauren was going back home.

I knew the cycle, understood the cycle, the cycle made sense. When you're in that position, the cycle was hard to remember.

They tell you to never respond in anger, something about saying things you don't mean. I always told Lauren exactly what I meant, so the anger had nothing to do with what I said, "You'll have to use your last breath to get me to come over there again. Ain't that much love in the fuckin' world."

"Eli....You stayed with Leah after she cheated on you. Pots and Kettles."

"We just lived in the same house. And even if I did, name a time I asked anybody to get whole rooms ready, help me get my shit, then go back. At this point, just say you like it."

Lauren paused her packing again, "Sorry, we can't all flip a switch and not give a fuck about people. When it's you, I'm always understanding and listen without judgment, but you're trying to guilt me into staying because of what Marc did to Ken. And I'm really sorry about that, but she wasn't hurt at all." Her tone, which was already accusatory, increased when she spoke her next sentence, "Marc can't even walk."

I stared, trying to figure out how she got that out of what I said. Me trying to get Lauren to leave wasn't a new occurrence– having been years in the making. Kensley had nothing at all to do with it until Marc brought her into the situation.

"Lauren, I would've killed that man by now if he wasn't related to me. It ain't about if she got hurt or not."

"Over a girl you met three months ago?"

"And the principle."

She looked like she was trying to see if I was serious or not.

I was.

The only part I lied about was the reason. While it mattered some that we were related, Marc and I treated each other like family on occasion, making it easy to forget we were brothers.

Lani was the reason. True, she didn't care that much for Marc, but he was still her dad. She told me how she looked forward to the trips when he put forth the effort, only she didn't want Lauren to feel bad by telling her.

When being receptive had its drawbacks.

Lauren sighed and zipped suitcase number two, "I'm so thankful that you never turned your back on me when I needed you." She opened the third suitcase, "But right now, I know what I'm doing and I don't really need you– for my marriage at least."

She'd never call her family for anything like that because she couldn't justify still being married to him with them. Who she'd call then? Didn't know.

• • •

Zi was in the process of telling us about his first time getting a pedicure, "The lil chairs jiggle your back and shit. It was cool."

"He didn't like it when they scrubbed the bottom of his feet though." Maria laughed after she took a drink from her cup, "'Bout to jump out the chair."

It was her who asked Kensley if we wanted to link with them later to watch the game. They'd spent the majority of the day together, which was how he ended up in the nail shop with her.

"That's so cute."

"Real cute." I snickered, agreeing with Kensley, "What color you got on ya' toes?"

"Fuck you."

Maria remembered that we were waiting on her to go next, and looked at the cards in her hand, "Eli draw 2."

I placed a card on top of her's "draw 4 lil Ken."

"Don't call me that." She scrunched her nose, "You can't get me used to some then try to change it."

"You just tryna get outta taking them shots," Zi replied while filling two glasses with white liquid.

Kensley scoffed, "Boy, please. My mama ain't raise no pussy."

I wouldn't say she was an alcoholic, but her ass be drinking.

Drunk Kensley was different. She was already goofy, and once you added the liquor, it's like she didn't even try to pretend she cared.

"Stand on that shit." He put a reverse card down, "Here go another one."

"Y'all don't care about my liver and Ion like that."

Maria tapped the glass, "You acting like you don't smoke at least 3 cigarettes a day."

"I know you fucking lying. Eli Ian think that was your type but I support you in  whatever."

Letting out a sigh, I placed my head on the table, "I 'preciate that. It just get stressful sometime waking up to somebody who smoke cigarettes. I almost ran away."

"Heavy on the almost 'cause I planned on catching his ass."

The irony. She was the one who almost ran away.

What she said? Heavy on the almost 'cause I planned on catching her ass.

I understood the hesitance– who wouldn't be hesitant? The goal wasn't to remove it but instead replace it.

Time.

"Oh, baby fuck no." Maria slightly slurred, "We don't chase these niggas."

"She wouldn't have caught me no way."

Kensley had yet to take her shot when Zi's phone began vibrating against the table. It was face down so nobody could see the person calling, but Maria was looking at it like she was tryna flip the shit over with her mind.

At least Kensley don't get drunk and start acting like Matilda.

Zi looked at the phone but made no effort to get it off the table.

Was I supposed to do something? I could go get my gun but it'd be doing too much to start shooting as a distraction.

Sighing in irritation when it began vibrating for the second time, Zi flipped it over and answered, "What?"

Don't nobody call me. I didn't have these problems. Or I didn't until he tried to hand me the phone.

Tried. I'd rather shit in my hands and clap than take it.

Leah was the only person who'd call his phone looking for me if I turned mine off. Why Zi would even try to give it to me was crazy.

I'm over here planning a shooting to get him outta a situation and he tryna make me take a phone call from Bozo.

I grabbed the phone standing up from the table, "Wassup?"

"Can you talk?"

I'd made it to the hallway damn near whispering, "No."

It was an awkward situation and it irritated me because we just had the conversation about it being too much.

She laughed, and I heard her moving around, "Trust me, she'll be glad to hear this one. I talked to Carmen, and by the end of the week, I can be in Philly."

"But...." I encouraged her to continue, wanting to know how to get to that.

"I want the restaurant out there, I want money, and I still want the house."

This had to be fake, "I can do allat."

"Then I'm gone. I pray and hope to God she fucks you over."

"Thank you," I replied earnestly, only responding to the first part of what she said.

The main problem had solved itself.

• • •

Kensley Parker

I watched in confusion as Jai stood over the stove, wondering if the plan was to kill everybody so she could peacefully go through with taking the pill.

Her food wasn't nasty by any means, she just was always very vocal about not being some man's maid, and usually refused to wake up early and cook because if he was hungry, then he could feed himself.

Here we were, 7 am, and she'd woken both myself and Coby up for breakfast. Maybe she was being nice, but knowing my friend, this was an ambush.

We waited, me impatiently because I wanted to know why she was cooking us breakfast, and Coby didn't know we were waiting for anything so he sat there nodding his head to imaginary beats.

He'd finished his plate when Jailyn spoke, "Ken I need a favor."

"Like?"

"It's nothing big." She assured me, "Something for Coby."

I told Jailyn what he asked last week, and the intent wasn't for her to tell him, but she didn't have to as Coby volunteered the information to her the day after I told. Up until now, I wondered the reasoning behind that.

Coby sat awkwardly while Jai repeated what he asked me the first time.

Why couldn't he do it himself? He had the opportunity to ask every day, yet he wanted me to do it.

"I like staying on this side of stuff." I tried to explain, "I don't know what they do, and I'm good with that."

"Youn have to do nothing but ask."

"If I do it, that's me not minding my business. It's not that I care whether you ask, I literally just don't wanna know shit about that. I don't even wanna know if he tells you yes or not."

Coby nodded and stood up, "I respect it."

Once he put his plate up and said he was going back to sleep, Jailyn placed her elbows on the table, clasping her hands together, "I need another favor."

"You got my anxiety on a thousand so please just say it."

"I need this bad. I ordered the pill but still have 2 weeks to take it. If you can– I don't know. I really don't wanna take it if I don't have to."

Then the favor was the same.

I sighed under my breath while Jai continued to try to convince me, "He knows a dude who already works with him, but it's levels or something like that. Coby said you gotta know people to talk to Christian."

The purpose of Coby asking me not to tell her, I thought, was because she wouldn't like it, and when I initially told her, she didn't. Apparently, he'd persuaded her to ask me by explaining it as he wouldn't be doing anything that would wind up with him dead.

I guess jail didn't exist anymore but hey.

"And you know how he gets when he's nervous. He start stuttering and shit."

This is something I wanted to avoid, but the baby.

.Jailyn knew exactly what she was doing by mentioning them. To me, her attempting to manipulate the situation spoke to the fact that she was desperate.

"I'll ask."

Relief washed over her face, "Thank you so much."

My food didn't taste as good anymore, so after picking over it, I raked the rest into the trash and went back into my room where Elijah was asleep.

• • •

i'd be lowkey upset if my friend made me feel like her baby's life depended on me doing something i specifically said i didn't wanna do chile.

y'all think ken being dramatic tho? it's just a question & elijah can always say no.

thanks for reading 💕