After getting a taxi and going to the house.

Hello-wait a minute,I never invited you!"

"Uh,yeah you did.You had Shrek take me here."

"I think I must have been hacked or something.But all I know is your not welcome here!"

A battle starts in the form of Mario and Luigi:Superstar Saga.Even the battle music plays.Sam dances to the beat for unknown reasons.

"Why are you dancing?"

"Don't question me."

Sam has 50 health.Dallas has 30(just a random number).Sam is about to jump on his head when he shouts:WERE YOU GOING TO JUMP ON MY HEAD?! ARE YOU INSANE?! Why are we even fighting in the first place?"
And then the "Battle" is over.

"Trying to get into my house uninvited,TRYING TO F*CKING JUMP ON MY HEAD! YOU ARE NOT WELCOME IN MY HOUSE AND YOU NEVER WILL BE!"

"B-"

"NO BUTS! NOW,GET OUT OF MY HOUSE OR I WILL DEAL WITH YOU MYSELF..."

Sam was frozen with fear(mainly because I hate loud noise and I lock up when stuff like that happens because of my Cerebral Palsy)and he teared up.

"CRYING WON'T GET YOU NOWHERE.NOW GET OVER HERE NOW SO I CAN GIVE A KNUCKLE SANDWHICH(&Knuckles)

Sam never got beaten up(it's true and I hope it stays that way)and he wasn't going to find out what it's like.He ran to the kitchen.

"GET BACK HERE!"

Sam found a knife,a lighter and club(who the fuck keeps a club in their house,let alone they're kitchen?)Sam couldn't handle the knife because of seizures.He could knock Dallas out with the club but his aim has to be presice.So he chose the club and the lighter because he can't think straight.

"S-stay-b-back...I got a weapon and I'm not afraid to use it..."

"So now your attempting to kill me? I don't even know why we're even friends...oh,wait we're not!"

Sam lit the club and threw it at him Breath of the Wild style but Luigi came out of nowhere and got hit and it bounced off him landed near something flammable...

"I don't know why your still here...you've done enough damage I'm surprised the house hasn't caught on fire-*he smells the air*Well sh*t..."

A piece a rubble knocks him out,causing Luigi to gasp.Sam gets him out of the rubble and puts him over his shoulder.

"Luigi,you get his cat and mom.I'll find a way out."

"But what about his-"

"Forget everything else.Just go!"

Sam found an opening and Luigi and everyone else got out to see the house explode.

Ok.That was Part 2.Part 3 will come soon.