nightmares

~~~

PAWS HIT THE GROUND carefully, weaving through the brambles of SkyClan's territory and the patches of ice that have formed during leafbare. The cold gusts of wind were frequent, but the hot, boiling anger rolling in her stomach kept her warm.

How dare he?

The thought had been dancing through her mind for the past weeks, and by now, it was nothing less than a resident in her brain, reappearing every few minutes. 

How dare he do this to me?

He'd been avoiding her. That much was obvious. The fact that he thought she wouldn't pick up on it was insulting.

Sure, they couldn't live together. She hadn't expected as much when they fooled around as apprentices, but she'd always thought him to be a noble tom. To abandon their kit and not even attempt to live up to his fatherly duties - the very thought sent another wave of rage throughout her as she thought of her son's face.

I don't want him to grow up wondering why he doesn't have both parents, or believing that his father abandoned him, she thought, flicking her tail-tip angrily. I don't want cats to whisper and gossip about who his dad is. This gets settled tonight.

When she approached the border, it didn't take long for her to realize she'd arrived first. Other than her, the area was deserted.

He better not be bowing out, she thought, scowling. If he's standing me up after finally agreeing to meet, I will go find him and drag him outhere by the ear.

However, that wasn't needed; a few moments later, the sound of a bush rustling came from her left. Her ears pricked, alert. The scent wasn't familiar. It was minty, and for a moment, she tensed, about to disappear into her territory, before she spotted a flash of his fur in the moonlight. It was only there for a second before his body vanished into the dark again, but it was him.

"I'm sorry I'm late." His voice came out in a low rumble and she had to resist the urge to roll her eyes. His face is hidden within the shadows, scent covered with mint, and was now doing a fake voice, all in case of an eyewitness. Needless to say, he really didn't want anyone to track this meeting back to him.

But she couldn't care less. "Quite frankly, I'm surprised you showed up at all. You've been avoiding me."

He hesitated, but didn't deny it. "Ashbird-"

"No, I'm not here to listen to your mousebrained excuses," Ashbird interrupted vehemently. "I'm going to talk, and you're going to listen."

When she received no reply, she could practically imagine him flicking his ears in the dark as an indication for her to continue.

"Oakkit needs his father."

His answer this time was quick. "I'm not going to join SkyClan."

"Like anyone in SkyClan would want you to, anyway," Ashbird spat, twitching her pelt in annoyance. "All I'm asking from you is to meet Oakkit by the border every now and then, and talk to him. And talk to him at the Gatherings."

A crunch in the snow indicated him shifting on his paws uncomfortably. "Ashbird, I wouldn't mind that, but it would be hard to accomplish without anyone finding out I'm his father."

The dark gray she-cat scoffed. "Well that wouldn't be a problem, because we're not going to hide the fact that you're his father."

She could imagine his recoil. "What?"

"Both our Clans deserve the truth," Ashbird mewed simply. "Your son deserves the truth, and he deserves to be able to interact with his father without trying to hide it."

"Ashbird, we can't let this get out," he hissed worriedly. "My Clan-"

"ThunderClan will simply have to deal with it," she answered sharply. "You-"

"Violetpaw."

The scene in front of Violetpaw flickered away as a new, airy voice interrupted the dream. The white she-cat was suddenly surrounded by mist with nothing around her for as far as she could see, almost like she was suspended in the sky.

When she looked around, confused, a dark gray pelt flashed into her vision. Violetpaw took a step back instinctively, but it didn't take her long to realize that this dark gray she-cat looked familiar, despite the fact that Violetpaw had never seen her before. She looked just like the white she-cat had imagined her from the countless stories and descriptions she's heard.

Ashbird.

As Ashbird neared Violetpaw, the white she-cat tensed, and had to remind herself that it was all just a dream to force herself not to flee. The last encounters she's had with SkyClan were not friendly, but Ashbird approached tentatively, her amber eyes flickering with restrained hope.

"Violetpaw?" she repeated, though this time in the form of a question.

A puzzled frown drew on Violetpaw's face. The connection between the living world and StarClan should be broken. Was this truly Ashbird's spirit? "How do you know my name?"

She was tense, on guard - maybe Ashbird was a spy for SkyClan somehow (if she could access Violetpaw's dream, why couldn't she do the same with her own Clan?) - but the dark gray she-cat's face split into a smile of pure joy and relief.

"You can see and hear me?"

This wasn't how Violetpaw had expected this to go. "Yes, I-"

"Oh, StarClan, that's wonderful," Ashbird mewed, waving her tail happily. "I've been stuck here by myself for years. I couldn't find my way to StarClan, and nobody seemed to be able to see me."

She's been by herself for years? Violetpaw couldn't help but feel a flicker of sympathy. "Is that why there's still so much debate over your death?"

Ashbird's face suddenly turned solemn, and she nodded. "I've been trying to show that memory to anyone I could find, but it's never worked until now. I can't believe-" She cut herself off, shaking her head. "Well, now you know. You must go tell Lilystar, and my dad, and-"

It occurred to Violetpaw very suddenly that Ashbird thought that the white she-cat knew her murderer's identity. The Ghost Assassin's identity. Maybe he showed his face or something like that near the end of the memory, but as of right now, Violetpaw hadn't a single clue who he was.

"Ashbird, wait-"

"Oh, I've been waiting ages for this." The dark gray she-cat's eyes gleamed. "Oakbounce will finally know the truth, and this stupid tom will finally get what he deserves, after killing me, killing Violetdust-"

"Killing Violetdust?" Those words rang oddly out of Violetpaw's mouth, and she felt a weird, unexplainable feeling in her stomach. 

Ashbird nodded. "The Ghost Assassin must pay for his crimes," she mewed, twitching her tail-tip sharply. 

Seeing how elated Ashbird looked - like a crushing weight that'd been on her shoulders for years had finally lifted - Violetpaw almost felt bad when the next words tumbled out of her mouth. "I don't know who the Ghost Assassin is."

Instantly, Ashbird's face fell, and a hint of desperation took over her voice. "But you must. You saw the memory-"

"His identity was hidden," Violetpaw mewed apologetically; however, she couldn't hide the undertone of confusion in her voice. 

Why did Ashbird look so panicked? Can't she just tell the white she-cat who her murderer is? 

"No," Ashbird mumbled, taking a step back. "No, no."

Violetpaw frowned, moving forward for every step that the dark gray she-cat retreated. "But you know who he is. Just tell me."

"I can't. Last time I tried telling someone-" Ashbird cut herself off, gulping. "They're going to send me back."

"What?" In Violetpaw's opinion, Ashbird was spouting absolute nonsense. "Who's going to send you back? And send you back where?"

But she didn't reply. Instead, she just continued to shake her head, staring at her paws.

Violetpaw tipped her head. The connection between the living world and StarClan should be breached. As far as she's aware, no spirits can come harm Ashbird. "Just try," she implored.

Ashbird's face was an array of emotions as her eyes danced from her left to right, as though desperately trying to decide what to do. Finally, she took a deep breath. "Okay-"

As soon as she said that word, chaos erupted.

The sky they seemed to be afloat in suddenly parted as a huge chasm opened beneath Ashbird. Violetpaw managed to back onto an edge, and she looked over worriedly towards the dark gray she-cat. Ashbird's eyes widened with panic, and she tried darting over towards Violetpaw, but given that there was nothing beneath her and therefore nothing to push off on, it didn't work.

She managed to take a leap that sent her right to the side of Violetpaw's edge, and the white she-cat reached out a paw to try and pull her up, but Ashbird was too far down. 

"Ashbird!" she yowled, desperately looking around for a solution. "Hang on!"

A growl came from the bottom of the chasm, and when Violetpaw peeked down, she saw only darkness. The Place of No Stars.

"There's nothing you can do for me here," Ashbird grunted as shadows darted out from the chasm. "Find him, Violetpaw."

The shadows grabbed onto her legs and started to tug her down, but both cats were helpless. 

Ashbird's voice got more panicked, more rapid. "He's not going to stop until she's satisfied. He can't. Avenge me. Avenge-"

As the shadows gave one last pull, overcoming her strength and bringing Ashbird down into the chasm, the dark gray she-cat yowled something that Violetpaw will never forget.

"Avenge us, Violetdust!"