Goodbye on this snowy morning
Shuichi's POV
December fifth. Its a snowy day here. I loved Christmas and snow in general because I loved the cold. I cant wait till see you after a long week of working. We dont get to talk as much now like we did before. You dont laugh at my jokes either. Its like you arent there at all. I always go get you beautiful purples flowers with a hint of blue on them.
You always did love them. You hated purple your whole life until we met and I told you that your eyes were really beautiful in themselves. I know you loved cuddling with me near the fireplace. You always loved when I kissed you all over. I loved hear your little giggles when I kissed behind your ear.
I always told you it was my first time in a relationship. It was like you forgot that. But I never said anything. I remember you would always drink Panta. Specifically grape. It was something you enjoyed drinking. You found it weird I loved black coffee. But the fact you tired to be me for a day was adorable. You hated the coffee so much but you were determined to be me for a whole day.
One thing you always did with me when we went to the mall was look at rings. Despite us only starting to date you loved the idea of being a wife. Telling me you would be a house wife while I was a hardworking husband. I loved that idea of coming home to see you smiling. You told me you wanted desperately sleep in the same bed as me and have sex. I always blush at the thought considering we're both virgins and only fifteen. But at the same time I loved your thinking.
You always found a way to make me smile like a idiot when I was feeling down. You did the dumbest things. You would jump until you couldn't feel your legs and fall. I always caught you though. That worries me. The fact you do that just for me. You always smile no matter what. It was like as if you never listened to others and their horrible remarks towards you. I looked up to you so much. I wanted to smile all the time just like you.
But now that I think about it. Driving closer to your home is making me remember what I have to tell you. Its going to break your heart but please understand that it breaks mine to do this as well. I never want to see you cry. But today I'll be crying knowing you wont listen to my words.
Flowers and soda in hand I get out the car. I sigh knowing this is a hard thing to say. Even if you do listen you'll just forget like always. I remember a time when you forgot my name. I thought it was a joke and in the end we both laughed. You always did love messing with others. I always thought everything you did was on purpose to cheer me up so I could forget my anxiety. But of course it wasnt and you never told me. I figured it out on my own.
Were you scared you'd lose me? I would never leave you over that,my love. I believed you when you smiled but that was a lie. You hated smiling but you did it for me. Why didn't you tell me? I love you no matter what. You always wore long sleeves. I figured out you hurt yourself because you think you arent good enough. But you are,darling. You make me so happy. The bandaids on your face you told me they were from falling down the stairs. Why didn't you tell me it was from my friends? I wouldn't be sad if I lost them as long as I had you by my side.
Standing in front of your house I just dont know how to feel still,my love. It hurts to see you like this. It hurt to see you there not moving. Eyes with no life in them with a chair underneath you knocked over. Why did you do it? I loved you so much. You knew I would do anything for you....so why? Why leave me in this hell hole where I could never be happy unless I thought of you? But now I only think of sadness. My fears came back when I saw that rope from the ceiling.
It made me sick to see you like that. Wasnt I enough? I'm supposed to be a detective and yet I couldn't figure out your secrets until after. So many questions fill my head but one main question is there. Did you hate me? I just need to know that one thing. The last thing I'll ever ask of you,my darling. But I'm here to make peace with you. I place the flowers and soda in front of your house.
I then remember what I need to tell you. But you wont hear me but I'm sure theres another solution so you can hear me. A small smile forms on my lips for the first time five years. I know I'm crying because I know I need to do this so he can hear me. I pull out the gun I have in my belt buckle and turn the safety off. I look at your home one more time. Before aiming the gun towards my head putting my finger on the trigger.
"I'll see you soon,Kokichi...."
BANG!
938 words
Sorry about this story.Im a bit down today but I'm proud of this one.I thought changing the way I write a little bit would show the emotion more in this.I think this is my favorite one yet.So thank you for reading.If you guys are interested in I've written other stories.So check them out if your bored or curious.Again thank you for reading and I'll see you all later.Bye
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