PTSD!Levi x OC

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Warning: This chapter contains sensitive content than can be triggering.

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Everyone was somehow affected by the war between humanity and the titans. Whether it be physically or mentally, no one was left unscathed. Soldiers would lose limbs-- an arm, a leg, sometimes both. Families would lose a father, or a sister, or a child. It left people paranoid, anxious, and even depressed.

Levi was no different. He has seen many things that he shouldn't have. The death of two of the closest people to him, the death of his squad. He's killed before. He's been injured before.

Mentally, he's hurting.

Alaina knew so. She knew her husband like the back of her hand, and could read him like a book, no matter what façade he put up.

She should've known it was going to happen. In fact, she almost went down that dark road herself. Expeditions led to nightmares so great, she resorted to cutting. Her arms were still scarred, even years later. The only reason she even stopped was because Levi chewed her out for it. Although, "chewed her out" was an understatement.

When he found out, which the way he found out was horrible-- during the process of lovemaking-- he was livid. Alaina has seen him mad before, but this was something different. Levi was never the one to show emotion, but the scowl that appeared on his face, and his eyes reflecting sadness, anger, and concern were all present.

He yelled at her. It got to a point where he actually broke down and started crying, because he was so worried.

It left an impression on the black haired girl, one so great that she stopped.

Now Levi had his own monsters to deal with.

It started with insomnia. Levi was known for being an insomniac. And even when he did sleep, it was only for a few hours. Alaina thought no different when he told her he hadn't slept that night; it wasn't unusual. It wasn't until she noticed he would go days without sleep that something was wrong.

She later learned that he, too, suffered from nightmares. But it was so much worse than hers.

The first few times it happened, Alaina was out leading an expedition. When she got back, late at night, the condition Levi was in was frightening.

His breathing increased, sweat trickling down his face. His eyebrows were scrunched up in agony, his mouth partially open, threatening to let out a scream.

It scared Alaina. She had rushed to wake him up. He sat up straight with a gasp, panting.

From then on, it was like a ripple affect. Flashbacks sometimes replaced his typical nightmares. If he was dazing off, flashbacks would appear. He had anxiety, he had suicidal thoughts, he was more hostile than usual.

A visit to a doctor explained it all.

Levi had Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.

He, of course, denied it completely, labeling it as "stupid" and "something that should've happened to me a long time ago."

It didn't stop the doctor from submitting the documents to the commander.

Alaina talked to him countless times about Levi's diagnosis. She would defend him, and refuse any therapy he offered. Levi absolutely did not want therapy. He just wanted to go back out and defeat the titans.

"Captain Waterson," Erwin said, sighing, his blue eyes meeting her dark blue ones, "as his wife, I'm sure you understand that getting him help is the top priority."

"Yes," she replied, crossing her arms, "however, Levi is a grown ass man, and if he doesn't want therapy, he doesn't have to go through with it."

"You rather see him suffer?"

Ah, he was going to play the guilt card.

Alaina scoffed, a glare appearing on her face. "Saying that is quite low, even for you, Commander Erwin."

He raised an eyebrow, and she could tell he was somewhat amused. "It's low for me to point out that you rather see him suffer than get help?"

"No," she sneered, slamming her first down on his desk, "What's low is that you want to guilt trip me. Stop acting like you know Levi better than me. He does not want to go to therapy; he's expressed this to me many times. He'd suffer more in therapy, actually. He wants to get rid of the titans, and he can't do that if he's too busy talking about his feelings."

Erwin let it go after that, and even let Levi go on an expedition (only because he demanded he be sent on one). Erwin still persisted, though.

At this point, you could only hope that you wouldn't regret your decision.

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This is for screwLogic101. I have a vague idea of what the next two parts are going to like. I'm trying to decide on how angsty this should be.

-Caity