SIX RUIN IT

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c. June 1994

     The first time Sam kissed Jeremiah, it took him by surprise. Jeremiah supposed he should have expected it -- he had always known there was something there with Sam. Although he had been sure it was all in his head. He chastised himself constantly, reminding himself that just because Sam was gay and had confessed to thinking Jeremiah was cute at that party a month ago didn't mean he was ever going to pursue anything. This led Jeremiah into wondering if he even wanted Sam to try and pursue anything. He had been slowly coming to terms with the fact that maybe, just maybe, he wouldn't mind.

So, here they were on the couch in Jeremiah's basement with Interview With a Vampire playing in the background, and Sam's lips pressed against his. It had come out of nowhere, but to Jeremiah, it felt just right. It felt natural in a way nothing ever had before.

When they finally pulled apart, Sam was visibly flustered, "I'm sorry, I probably shouldn't have done that, fuck, I've messed it all up now, haven't I? Ruined a perfectly good friendship, I just... I'll -- I'll go."

"So ruin it," Jeremiah found himself saying, not even sure if he was still breathing at this point. Sam looked at him quizzically, as if waiting for him to say anything more.

"Uh, sorry?" the boy asked, raising his eyebrows as he froze. The movie played on behind them.

Jeremiah didn't hesitate, "Ruin the friendship."

Sam seemed to get the message, leaning in and kissing the boy again this time with more certainty and passion. Jeremiah grabbed onto the sides of the boy's face, his pale skin contrasting against Sam's dark tone. He had never kissed a boy before (he had never kissed anyone if he was being honest), but he found he liked it. A lot. He liked the way Sam's lips felt against his, the way it felt to have his hands twisting in Jeremiah's dirty blond locks that were getting to be just a little too long -- something he was grateful for now. He was no longer registering the words of Lestat or Louis playing on the television, as far as he was concerned the world started and stopped with Sam Wilson. He should be ashamed of himself, his mind hovered on the thought for just a moment before he threw it out the window. What was this? The 50s? Please. It was 1994, people needed to get with the times if they still thought being gay was something shameful.

Was Jeremiah gay, though? He certainly never had crushes on girls growing up. Never enough to consider doing something about it. He also didn't think a straight man would enjoy kissing his best friend this much, that was another thing to consider.

They pulled apart and both boys were smiling as if they had just come across something beautiful, which, in Jeremiah's mind, they had.

The rest of the night was spent against each other as they watched the remainder of the movie. Jeremiah took note of the way Sam's hand would absentmindedly play with his fingers while they watched as if it was the most natural movement in the world. Part of him wondered how long Sam had been wanting to do that. Jeremiah wondered how long he had wanted him to.

"You aren't even paying attention, they just killed a woman and you didn't even flinch," Sam asked with a small chuckle after a few moments had passed. "What are you thinking about?"

"Stupid stuff," Jeremiah muttered as he looked down at their loosely intertwined fingers.

"You're not --"

"Regretting it? No," the boy immediately brushed off the idea as he shook his head, a small smile on his face, "I guess I'm just wondering how long you've wanted to do that."

Sam shrugged, "I thought it was obvious. From the moment I met you. I could have sworn I told you."

"I didn't know you were serious!" he laughed, smacking the both playfully, "I thought... I dunno what I thought. Did you only become my friend because you were interested in me?"

The dark-skinned boy shook his head, "I became your friend because I thought you were interesting and you seemed like you needed one. The wanting to kiss you all the time was the hard part, actually, uh, I don't wanna, like, force anything on you at all. I know some people think that gay people can't control themselves or whatever."

"That's bullshit and you know it," Jeremiah scoffed, "The last part, not the whole thing, sorry, but yeah. Bullshit. Also, all the time?"

"Well maybe not during that really hard math test a couple of weeks ago, I was more focused on the problems," Sam teased, a grin forming softly on his lips as his eyes met Jeremiah's. "But yeah, I've had a stupid crush on you from the first time I saw you across the room at that party. Tease me about it all you want, I'm not ashamed."

He knew Sam didn't mean anything by it, but hearing the words "I'm not ashamed" leave his mouth warmed Jeremiah's heart. Just the fact that someone could be so prideful about something most people hid for most of their lives. It was inspiring, he thought. It made Jeremiah want to kiss him even more. So, he did. He liked that he could do that now.

"It's not stupid if I feel the same way," Jeremiah muttered after they broke apart for the third time that night.

"You do?" Sam asked, his voice filled with a hope he had never heard before.

He nodded, his hands still holding the boy's cheeks, "Yeah, I would have thought that was obvious by now. Do I need to make it clearer?"

Sam shrugged, a teasing smile dancing on his lips as he said, "Maybe a little."

Jeremiah was always good at following instructions so he simply kissed the boy again. And again, and again, and again. He supposed he would have to watch Interview With A Vampire some other time.

for some reason i wrote this chapter thinking it was 1995 and interview with a vampire didn't come out until November of 1994 and this chapter is set in June 1994 so we're just gonna pretend it came out November 1993 okay sounds good thanks guys