alexander

Before I knew it, Aaron was gone, out of sight. And I was completely and entirely alone in a house full of drunk college students. Not fun.

"You look new," someone scoffed behind me. I turned.

"I-I...uh... I am."

"Name's Madison. James Madison."

"I-I'm Alex."

"Nice to meet you. So what? You gonna be a lawyer or something?"

"Yeah... S-Something like that."

He chuckled. "Hey Thomas! I've got some new meat for you by the door!" he shouted.

"Bring him over!" someone shouted back.

James dragged me over to a group of guys by my sleeve. "Uh, hi?" I practically whimpered. They shoved a red cup in my hand, spilling some beer on my shirt. I looked around, slightly panicking, looking for someone, anyone, Aaron Burr.

"I'm Thomas," one of them said. "This is my frat."

"It's, uh, n-nic-"

"Hey, Burr! They say you brought this guy in," Thomas stated.

"Yeah, I did. He's a friend. A pre-law major friend. Don't fuck him up, okay?" Aaron came into view and put a hand on my shoulder. Oh, thank God!

"Relax, a couple cups won't hurt him. Look at him, he can handle it, can't you Hamlin?" Thomas slurred.

"Hamilton."

"Whatever. Drink some more." He tipped the cup back into my mouth.

"Thomas, c'mon man. Don't get him drunk okay? This is his first party and -"

"Then we have to get him drunk. Madison! Make sure Hamilton's always got a cup full, alright? Burr and I are gonna have a word," he hiccuped.

"Alex, be smart!" Burr shouted back as Thomas pushed him away.

"I-I really shouldn't-"

"You really should."

"But-"

"No-"

"I-"

"Stop. Drink." And I did. I drank cup after cup until I felt a fuzzy feeling in my ribs. I could feel the alcohol flowing through me. By this time, everyone had gotten bored of some new kid who could hold his liquor. So I was alone again, except now I was getting drunk. Everything was starting to get hazy and all of a sudden someone spun me around.

"Told ya I'd see you here." Lee.

"I need burn," I slurred.

"Burr? He left. He bounced with Madison." He was rubbing my forearms.

"Wha?"

"Oh, yeah. He told me to come get you, take you home." He slipped his index fingers into my belt loops.

"Hey! Ge-Get off ofme."

"You're helpless Hamilton."

I shoved against him and ran through the sweaty crowd of people grinding on each other or making out. Charles caught my hand. "Letmego Lee!" I shouted.

"Let him go!" I spun clumsily on my heel and fell into someone's arms. I looked up and saw Aaron.

"Way to be buzzkill, Burr," Charles scoffed.

"We're going home, Alexander." I nodded and wrapped my arms around his shoulders and he helped me walk.

"M'sorry," I hiccuped once we were outside. Everything was still.

"Thomas got you drunk, and Charles is an asshole, nothing was your fault," Aaron said. I sighed and we continued to walk in a stiff silence. We had to stop two, maybe three times, so I could puke up everything in my system. It burned and made my eyes water. God, I wanted John. I wanted him to come scoop me up in his arms. "C'mon we're almost there." He opened the door and sat me down on a couch. "I'm going to get John. Just stay there."

I felt my eyes grow heavy as Aaron morphed into some blur disappearing on the staircase. I closed my eyes for what felt like just a few seconds and suddenly felt a harsh grip on my shoulder. I turned sharply, but it was just John. "Hi John," I slurred.

"Alex, c'mon, let's get to bed." He put his arms around my waist and helped me up the steps. He opened the door and helped me change clothes and told me to get some sleep while he went to go talk to Burr. I caught his wrist as he started to walk away.

"Johnny..." I trailed.

"Alex, you need-"

I leaned forward, almost losing my balance. "I-"

"Need some sleep," he said quickly. I made a face at him and shook my head.

"I lo-"

"Go to sleep, you're drunk." And he stormed out of the room. I felt tears in my eyes, but forced myself to shrug it off and climb into bed. I got under the sheets and stared up at the ceiling, letting tears fall and pool around my head.

"I love you," I whispered. I rolled over onto my side and shut my eyes until I passed out.

-

john

"What the hell happened? Why is he drunk?" I asked, closing the door behind me.

"Thomas happened," Aaron responded.

"The fuck you mean, 'Thomas happened'?" I put a firm finger on his chest.

"He met James and he found out what he's majoring in. They kept giving him drinks like some sort of initiation. Thomas made me walk outside and when I got back he was- he was a mess."

"Is that it?"

"That's it."

I sighed. "I-"

"Are you okay?"

I took in a deep breath. "I think Alex is trying to tell me he loves me."

"Okay and that's a problem because..?"

"You know exactly why that's a problem! You know what L-... You know what he said to me, what he did. I don't want that to happen again." I wiped my face.

"John, if he's saying it first, I don't think that it'll end up like last time."

"He's fucking drunk Aaron. I don't want him to say it when he's drooling all over himself and can barely stand, I-I want him to mean it if he's going to say something like that."

"I know-"

"No, you don't. Goodnight Aaron." I turned on my heel and slammed the door behind me. Alex was asleep on his side, laying on his own bed. I slid down the door and felt tears burn in my eyes. And when I started to softly sob, I realised that Alex wasn't actually asleep.

"Johnny," he mumbled. I wiped my eyes and walked over to him. I sat next to him and interlocked our fingers.

"Yeah, I'm here Alex. Get some sleep."

He mumbled something under his breath, but when I asked him to repeat himself, but he had already passed out. I sighed and laid down next to him.

-

I woke up around 9 am, next to a groaning Alexander. I turned to look at him. He was rubbing his head, taking deep breaths. "You okay?" I asked.

"I feel like I was just hit was a crane full of bricks," he muttered.

"So hungover?" I teased. He forced out a small laugh.

"Yeah. Hungover."