DANE

"I swear it was an accident." I said, barely choking out the words when Niklaus blew his god awful cigarette smoke right into my face. If he keeps doing that I'm going to develop lung cancer.
"How on earth do you manage to set the fire alarms off when you had cherry tomatoes in a pan?"
Natasha in the distance covered her laugh, while I sat in silence pondering my next words.
"Answer!"
"I can't cook!" I blurted. I really gave in now. It was a "I said so" moment for her. A reward; a treat. Just you wait Natasha, just you fucking wait.
"Whatever. Leave."

Natasha immediately elbowed me in my forearm and laughs, "I can't cook," she mocked.
"Oh shut up." I scoffed, "yes I can"
"No you can't"
"Natasha why don't I hit up Gordon Ramsey to taste test your food-see how you feel, eh?"
She rolls her eyes, "he'd projectile vomit if he ate your food."
"He'd get food poisoning and parasitic worms in his organs if he ate your food."
"Okay-"
I interrupt her from speaking anymore. "Okay besides the point-we still need to escape. Everyone at Dauntridge probably thinks we're done and dusted. Well maybe just your family. But-"
"Dane we know the password now."
"I know-" I try elaborating.
"Okay so. We wait until Niklaus leaves the house one day; preferably with Dmitri. Then we try to find the right keys for the garage and some car keys in there too."
"Natasha the garage is face authenticated."
"Well, me and Niklaus basically look the same. He just has less hair!"
"God please don't say that." I facepalm.
"Moving on, I don't think my face would work. However, I do think that Niklaus might be stocking some off his temporary 'passing out' drugs. You know, the ones that make you unconscious?"
"Yep."
"We just use it on him, and tada! We have access to his garage. That is literally our escape!" She chuckled, "you probably have to pick his body up off the ground though."
"I really can't tell if this is the dumbest idea known to mankind, or the smartest idea ever concocted."