"Ram, busy ka?"

"Well, I—" Hindi ko pa natatapos ang sinasabi ko, bigla nang may sumingit na iyak ng baby sa background at boses ni Cali na nagha-hum at mahinang kumakanta.

"Sorry, hu-hu," sabi agad niya na hindi ko sure kung para sa akin ba o sa baby. "Ito na po ang milk ni Chewy. Huwag na iyak, ha?"

I spent a few minutes waiting for him to finish feeding his baby. Chewy is Cali's second baby. Humahabol pa ang pangatlo. It was supposed to be a joke noong una, pero hindi ko na rin alam sa kanila, because Cali was being competitive in an awkward place, at sinasabi niya laging nauunahan na siya ng kalaban. And kalaban means, si Luan. Luan has three babies, and the competition for the favorite baby has begun.

Si Luan ang pambato ni Ninong Leo. Si Cali naman ang kay Ninong Clark.

Cali dropped the call and sent a message saying he'd call back later. He did. The next try was a bit more peaceful than the first call.

"Okay, hmm, where should I begin? Malapit nang matapos MA mo?"

"Tapos na," natatawang sagot ko.

"Oh! I see, I see. Kailan ka uwi?"

"After ng processing ng records ko. Waiting na lang din ako sa ceremony, uwi na rin ako agad. Why pala?"

"Wala naman, hehe. Miss lang kita?"

"Shut up, Cali. Never mo 'kong na-miss. Unless, may kailangan ka."

"Hahaha! Grabe talaga. Tingin mo sa 'kin, di ka mahal? 'De, inform mo lang ako kung uuwi ka para masundo kita sa airport. Siguro, mga bukas, ganiyan, haha! Joke, half-meant."

"I can go home alone. Tigilan mo nga ako," napapangiting sabi ko. "May plano ka, 'no?"

"Huy, wala, a. Aym inosens."

"Hahaha! Innocent, your face," buyo ko. "Kung may plano ka, tigilan mo na. Pass ako diyan."

"Ang overthinker. 'Yoko na nga."

"So, meron nga?"

"May plano akong mag-island, tapos ikaw pagagastusin namin para tipid kami ng asawa ko. Makiki-celebrate kami ng graduation mo pero kami na mag-iisip ng venue, ikaw na lang magbabayad ng accomodation."

"Alam mo, punyeta ka."

"HAHAHA! Napakaramot ng Damaris Lauchengco na 'yan! Para libre lang?"

"Tigilan mo 'ko, Cali. Wala akong pera."

"'Damot talaga. Sige na, umuwi ka na lang tapos 'wag ka nang magpakita sa 'kin. Dadalhin ko hanggang sa hukay ang sama ng loob ko ngayon."

"Shut it, Cali. Magcha-chat na lang ako kapag pauwi na 'ko. Next time na yung island. Alagaan mo muna babies mo."

"Oo na, oo na. Sabihin mo exact date, ha! Seryoso yung sundo sa airport."

"Oo, tapos tatangayin mo agad ako sa island galing sa van para hindi na ako makakatanggi."

"Huwag mo 'kong pangunahan, Ramram. Don't remind me my plan. Di ko nakakalimutan, eksyoshmi."

"Hahaha! Sige na, ba-bye na. Yung baby mo, umiiyak na naman."

"Oo na, bye-bye, labyu! Ingat ka lagi!"

It's been eight years since I left the Philippines and studied abroad. Every special occasions lang ako umuuwi, and hindi pa sa Manila. Most of the time, sa Palawan or Cebu, but Manila? Eight years straight, walang Manila sa kahit saang itinerary ko. Ang lagi kong sundo sa airport, si Cali or si Rex.

After ng bachelor's degree ko sa LNU, dumeretso ako ng MA sa Cambridge. Finance pa rin naman, gaya ng suggestion ni Tita Shin. Two years lang ang MA ko, including the researches and dissertations, and occasional na pag-stop dahil sa breakdowns bago ako lumipat sa Canada for further studies.

Honestly, I really had no idea what I was doing. Probably because I grew up having no dreams at all. It felt like I was raised to be Connor Dardenne's wife. And since I left him before our exact wedding ceremony, everything about my existence has been lost.

Eight years ko nang hinahanap ang purpose ko sa mundo. From UK, lumipat ako ng Sweden, nag-New York, then nalipat sa British Columbia. You've written a lot of books and research; you've done a lot of studies; you've tried to enjoy life like others do it, but still—lost.

Coco had plans for us. Sobrang dami niyang plan. Maybe because Tito Rico reminded him that he should have plans before marrying me—he did.

Pero iniwan ko siya sa kasal naming dalawa. Ibig sabihin din, iniwan ko ang lahat ng plano niya mula pa noon.

But I left him . . . na alam niya. I didn't leave him nang hindi ko sinasabi ang gagawin ko. It was a clear agreement between us . . .

"Kung ayaw mo 'tong gawin, Ram . . . huwag ka nang pumunta. Hindi ako magagalit."

Those were the last words I heard from him eight years ago. I left. After that, even a single letter or a soft hum from him—I haven't heard any of it. Sa daming beses kong nakasama ang mga pinsan niya, ni isang beses, hindi siya binanggit ni Cali o ni Rex. Para siyang banned word sa amin—sa akin. Every occasion, every family gathering na kasama ako, wala siya. But he was always there every time I wasn't. I stopped attending all family gatherings when I was twenty-seven. Because I knew Coco loved me the way he thought I should be loved, and I had a different opinion about it. Nobody could blame him for trying his best to start his future with me, and all I did was crush those hopes by leaving him in front of everyone who was rooting for us.

Hindi ko na rin nga inaasahang patatawarin pa niya ako dahil sa ginawa ko. Ipinahiya ko siya sa lahat ng inimbitahan ng parehong pamilya namin at nagtiis siya nang sobrang haba na mga taon sa pagharap sa kanila; samantalang ako, ni minsan, hindi ko man lang tinangkang bumalik at magpakita sa harap ng mga tao na dumalo sa kasal naming dalawa.

Wala sana akong balak bumalik hanggang sa nakita ko ang shared post ni Rex. It was Coco's post, and the photo attached to it was his hand and another girl's hand. There was this subtle fear and anxiousness within me na ayaw basahin ang post because of the photo, but there was eagerness and courage to know what the story behind it was.

"I knew that this day would come, but I didn't expect it too soon . . ."

I took a deep breath. I haven't started too far yet; my tears were already forming along the lines of my eyes.

It was Coco's hand, holding the hand of a girl full of IV needles and tapes. A long tube was attached to it, and her skin was paler than his natural skin color.

"If I could give you half of my life so we could be together longer than now, I would give it to you without even asking. God knows how many prayers I've sent to Him every minute, hoping any of them would be considered for you..."

I simply pat my lone tear with my forefinger and read the rest of the short post.

"I don't want to question Him for not listening to my prayers. Maybe you've fought enough battles, and God needs His best angels up there. Ang hirap namang maging bad boy, hindi ako welcome sa pupuntahan mo."

I would be laughing if the situation were different, but I couldn't. I could feel his pain just by reading his post.

"I love you so much, Dree. I'll see you someday in paradise."

His sadness definitely transcended online through my chest. It gave me a heavy feeling na ang hirap alisin.

Whoever that Dri was, I knew she loved him better than I did before. I should be thankful. But reading Coco's post made it harder for me to accept because she left him—permanently. At ang hirap isipin na iniwan na naman si Coco ng isang babae, pero hindi gaya ko, siguradong hindi na iyon babalik pa kahit anong pilit niya.

It was an unwanted decision, and no one even asked for my presence, but without a second thought, I booked a flight to Manila.

Hindi na ako hihingi ng forgiveness mula kay Coco because I knew that what I did was unforgiveable, but my mind automatically thought that I should be there for him. Patawarin man niya ako o hindi, ayokong isipin niyang wala akong pakialam sa kanya kahit sobrang tagal na naming hindi nagkikita.

Kahit hindi na bilang dating fiancée niya. Kahit bilang kababata at kaibigan na lang—kung alin man diyan ang kaya pa niyang tanggapin mula sa akin.

Runaway Playlist 

♥♥♥

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Next Wattpad update: November 11, 2023

RUNAWAY STATUS: ONGOING

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