Kat
February 14, 2005

*

2 weeks later

*

"Do I really have to go?" I plead with my best friend, hoping to stay in tonight.

"Yes." She gives me a "don't question me" look that I'm sure she will use on her children someday.

"But... will he be there?" She knows exactly who I'm talking about.

"Oh, I don't know... Probably not?" I can sense her hesitation.

"You are a terrible liar." I roll my eyes as I continue getting ready.

"Listen, just don't think about that jackass tonight. Have fun with me!" She grabs onto my arm, bouncing with excitement.

"Oh please, like you will have time for anyone other than your Valentine." She tries to object, but I hold up my hand to stop her. "We both know I will be sitting in the corner by myself, probably watching him with some skank... silently praying for a quick merciful death."

"God, you are so morbid. Come on! It's Valentine's Day!" She turns to the mirror to finish her makeup. "Plus Luke and Soph will be there and Kai is really excited to see you." Kai had grown on me, despite our rocky start.

"Crap... He is totally going to be there." I figured he would be, but knowing everyone else would be there only cemented it.

I had somehow managed to avoid him, at least directly, for over a month. It was quite an accomplishment since I enjoyed being around his friends so much.

Must have been by the grace of God. Oh no... now I sound like Mom. Dad would be so proud, the thought leaving a bitter aftertaste in my brain.

This is so not what I need tonight.

"Well, I actually know someone who might take your mind off of him. He's been wanting to meet you for weeks." She isn't meeting my eyes and she's biting her fingernails. Crap, she must be really nervous.

"Ness... what are you talking about?" I'm not actually sure I want to know.

"Well... this guy... Jonathan... He's seen you around... and well... he kinda wanted me to introduce you... tonight." She paces the room like a caged animal, as she continues to chew the skin on her fingers since there's nothing left of her nails at this point.

"Ness, calm down. Please stop, at least for the sake of your poor hands." I try to process what she just dropped on me, as I grab her hand, forcing her to stop pacing. "Okay, so, why does this Jonathan guy want to meet me so badly?" I take a seat on her bed.

She scoffs, sitting next to me. "Come on, Katie-bug... Even you aren't that dense."

I just stare at her, completely confused.

"Ugh... Seriously? He thinks you are hot and he wants some of that." She gestures towards me.

"What?!? Jeez, did you really have to put it like that?" I can feel my face burning from embarrassment.

"Oh god, Katie-bug, you are such a prude. I swear! Maybe Johnny can help with that." She giggles and bounces on her bed. "Ooooh, maybe he's into some kinky shit! You know, it's always the pretty boys."

My mouth pops open as I feel the blush take over my face. I know I'm only feeding fuel to her fire, but I can't even try to hide my shock. I am pathetic.

Vanessa doubles over in laughter, nearly falling off the bed. "Oh. My. God!" She's barely able to get each word out between her giggles. "Look. At. Your. Face!" She points at me, continuing to mock me.

I push her arm that's extended, throwing her off balance. She falls, landing face first on the carpet. It's my turn laugh, my eyes water and I can barely breathe, but it's totally worth it.

"Fuck! That fucking hurt you fucking bitch!" She hops back up on the bed, punching me in the arm before joining in my laughter.

"Okay, okay." She tries to calm us down. "Alright, if it wasn't me, that would have been pretty good, but seriously that fucking hurt!"

"Well, at least you got the rug burn a different way this time." I smirk, proud of my quick wit.

"Ah! You skank!" She throws her pillow directly at my face. Even though it's soft, it still stings.

"Pretty sure, I'm not the skank in this room, whore!" I throw the pillow back, but miss.

"Pretty sure Ben would disagree!" The proud look on her face immediately vanishes. I feel like I've been punched in the stomach.

"Shit, Kat. I'm sorry. That was really insensitive. Please forget I said that." She moves closer to me, probably to comfort me but all I feel the need to get out of the room.

"Don't worry about it." I run out the door, into the safety of a bathroom stall.

Okay, so it's not super private, but when you live in a dorm with a roommate, it's about as good as it gets.

I sit there long enough to calm down, but I'm still not ready to go back to the room. Unfortunately, I know if I wait much longer, Vanessa will come find me.

"Kat?" I hear Sophie's voice echo through the bathroom.

"Yeah, Soph?" I almost didn't respond, but she obviously knows I'm in here.

"You coming? We are all riding together." Her voice is soft and sweet, just like her. Instantly, I feel relaxed and ready to spend time with my new friends.

"Yeah, just a second." I flush the toilet to make it seem like I wasn't just a weirdo sitting in here.

I make my way to wash my hands because it's a public bathroom and it's disgusting not to after touching anything in here.

"Are you okay?" She seems concerned and I wonder if Ness sent her to check on me.

"Of course. Let's go." I don't need her to be worried about me. I will be fine. I'm just being a stupid girl.

I throw the paper towel into the garbage can as I turn to leave, but Sophie stops me by placing her hand on my arm. "Hey, listen, I know it's tough, but I'm really glad you are coming."

I love her to death, but I am so sick of everyone treating me this way. I just want to be normal, but everyone seems to be worried I'm about to break.

Yes, he's a jerk, but seriously it's not that big of a deal.

Yeah, keep telling yourself that. Maybe someday you will actually believe it.

"I'm good. Really." I try to give her my most convincing smile as we finally make it out the door.

Traffic was slow, but we finally made it to the stupid Valentine's Day party at Nate's. The house is overflowing with people holding plastic red cups and couples making out everywhere. I can already tell I'm going to hate this.

I spot him, across the room sitting at the kitchen table. Surprisingly, he's alone, engrossed in his phone.

Yeah, like that's going to last. Cue the blonde bimbo who's probably on her way back from the bathroom right now.

I sit on the couch with Sophie and Vanessa, as Nate hands us each a drink and squeezes next to my best friend.

As Luke walks in, he only has eyes for Sophie. He leans down to kiss her in greeting and I suddenly feel awkward sitting there.

"Here, sit here." I stand, gesturing to my seat.

"Oh no, Kat. Don't worry about it." He's so nice, but I honestly don't want to sit there anymore.

"Please, I insist. It is Valentine's Day after all." I smile as I step away.

"Okay..." He hesitates, but only for a moment.

I move to the love seat to sit alone. How pathetic am I?

"Hello, my lady." I feel the seat move next to me. I look up to find Kai, smirking.

"Hey Kai!" I lean in to hug him as we continue to make small talk. As happy as I am to see the blockhead, I find myself longing to spend my time with someone else.

I look over at him, out of habit. I try not to watch him, but for some reason my eyes always find him.

Because I'm a stupid girl.

Our eyes meet, for just a second and I feel the air rush from my lungs.

Wait... was he just staring at me? No way, he must have just happened to look up at the exact wrong time.

I totally didn't notice that he's still sitting by himself. Nope, I didn't notice that at all.

I head to the bathroom, annoyed with my unusually small bladder. I barely drank anything. I try to mentally count the cups.

Okay... so maybe I drank more than I realized. Oops. What would Dad say?

Nope, not going down that mental path...

When I return to my seat, I find it's taken. Kai looks at me apologetically. "Katarina, this is Barbie."

"Oh! The girlfriend. It's so nice to finally meet you." I reach out to shake her hand, but she just grimaces at me like I might give her a disease.

"And who are you, exactly?" I'm not sure how to answer her... But the disdain in her eyes says she doesn't really care anyway.

"It's Kat. And my best friend is dating Kai's roommate." I guess that's who I am? Hopefully it's good enough.

"Babe, your kinda in Kat's seat." Her face falls slightly. Oh god, now I feel awkward.

"Oh no, don't worry about it. It's all yours." I back away, hoping she doesn't see me as a threat.

"Yeah, well I am his girlfriend, after all." I can't say I disagree with her, but it's still shocking she said it out loud.

"Of course." I mumble, as I walk away from her hateful gaze. I understand why not even Luke or Sophie can stand her. What on earth does Kai see in her?

Well, there goes all my friends, lost in the daze of their significant others... I need to get out of here.

But where can I go?

I find my feet leading me to a familiar room. I open the door slightly.

"Hello?" No answer.

I don't even bother to turn on the light as I crash into the bed.

Thank God. Alone at last.

Character Inspiration

Barbie (model uncredited)