Run Before You Walk

The following was inspired by the Collar Bomb Heist, 2003

"So, what are you having for lunch? Want to get something?" asked Akshara.

"And leave the most important day of the year? The Boss will have our asses! Besides, the accounts won't file themselves." Said Aadhi.

"Well, he should have thought about that before he purchased that Villa in the country side with the company's money."

"Hush. Do you want to continue working here or not? And try to do something productive."

"So...? Do you want some extra Cheese on the pizza?"

"Yes, please."

A little while later,

The pizza delivery guy is waiting outside the bank, and is seen talking to someone on the phone. One can clearly see he is anxious, as sweat continues to drip down his half-torn jeans and eventually covering his shirt, which normally would be replaced with his uniform jersey.

"Please, I have a family to tend to""Well, they will be mighty disappointed if you don't!"

"Okay, Okay, I will do it!"

"Don't make me call again!"

"Wait. What should I do after I walk out of there? Hey Lady, you there?"

*CALL HUNG UP*

Taking a long breath, he entered the footsteps of the Quantum Bank. With minimal security and a drunkard for a Chief Security Officer, something was bound to happen and fast, as the lethargic security measures provided an inherent catalyst for chaos.

"There you are, I was about to call you guys. It was about time you brought that pizza! We are starving!"

"Sorry for being so late and that will be 150 Crore rupees."

As Aadhi reached for his wallet, he asked, "I'm sorry what did you say the amount was?"

The pizza delivery guy responded rather nervously, "150.... 150 Crore Rupees"

As the two co-workers stare at each other, comprehending the confusing response from the guy who was talented in menial work, the Pizza guy started unbuttoning his shirt!

"Oh my God!" shouted Akshara!

"Okay, buddy. Calm down, we can have a rational talk about this. No need to kick things on."

The almost crying delivery man was showcasing the bomb that has been neatly tied to his torso and a phone connected to a large package covered in block letters which spelled C-4. But to the employees of Quantum Bank, it meant one and only one thing only, total chaos!

"Get your manager here! Right now!" shouted the sobbing Pizza Guy.

"Boss, sorry to disturb you. But we have a situation downstairs!" said Aadhi.

"What is it this time?"

"Well boss, to sum up, if we don't tackle this problem. Everything will blow up!"

As the two go down,

"Holy Mother of God. What the hell is this?"

"And you must be the manager. You sir, have the responsibility to save all the lives in this building. Including yours and mine!"

"Okay. What is it that you want?"

"Give me the 150 Crores and I'm literally walking out the next moment!"

The petrified employees didn't know what to do. They all gathered together and started perpetrating prayers, while the manager and his protégé, Aadhi cleared the vault into one huge bag. Even they knew that this guy was carrying out a suicide mission. He can virtually never get out of this place with all these money. It is too heavy for one guy to carry all this money outside.

"Here you go, man. 150 Crore Rupees in the bag. So what's next?"

"How did you get caught up in this mess anyway? You don't look like someone who can harm others in any way" asked Akshara to the Pizza Guy.

"I was just delivering a pizza to a place. Someone put something like a blindfold and tied something around me. I only heard voices and before I could realize, I was on the streets tied with this around my waist."

"Do you remember anything at all.....?"

*BEEP BEEP*

"Everyone shut the hell up! This is the most important phone call in all of our lives! You better stay goddamn quiet!"

"I hope everything is going well, as I told you?" asked the woman.

"Yes. Can you tell how I'm supposed to carry all this load from the middle of nowhere? Do you expect me to carry it in my motorcycle?"

"Oh. Sorry. About that. Switch on the speaker."

*CLICK*

"Good Afternoon, Quantum Bank. Be alive, people. And would someone volunteer for Samir here and check on the vehicle he came upon! And please don't try to get too close."

As Aadhi opened the door, he saw the vehicle alive and intact,

"I don't understand. Why did she...?"

*BOOM!*

"That's my bike. That's my bloody bike, you Bit..."

"Remember to whom you are talking to, Samir. Is your bike important to you than your life?"

"Okay, how do you expect me to walk out of this place? Do you think someone is going to offer a lift to someone who's got a bomb strapped to his chest?"

"Yea. I totally agree with Butt wad right here! You so should have gone with other suitable candidates here. Someone athletic, like Somu from our Accounts department. That guy was a State Champion for something in consecutive occasions!" said Aadhi.

"Aadhi, shut up, Will you?" Shouted Akshara.

"I'm warning everyone there. Do not interrupt as I'm talking to you." Said the Woman.

"She sounds worse than you" whispered Aadhi to Akshara.

"Shut up!" said Akshara.

"Samir, go outside. A number of vehicles will be approaching you. Whatever happens, do not get tensed. I can't afford any more tensed co-workers. I already got tons at my day-job!"

"So, you de-stress yourself by raiding banks as a part time job?" asked Aadhi.

"I thought I said do not interrupt my call. I have half the mind to call the phone strapped to that bomb, Samir is wearing."

"Dude, a Psycho on the other side is trying to blow us into smithereens. So just shut up and let her continue." Shouted Samir.

"I'm going to let that slide, because you already got a lot of things on your chest. Get it....? Never mind. Go to the door, now!"

As Samir opened the door,

"Freeze, you son of a gun" shouted one amongst many a cop who was surrounding the whole place with guns pointed at Samir's direction!

"Okay Samir, place the bag in front of you and place the other package I gave you on top of it!" said the voice from the call.

As Samir placed the small package from his Pizza Bag on top of the heavy bag,

"Now, Samir. Turn on the speaker, so that the policemen can hear this."

"Gentlemen, what you see before you is Class Z C-4 which armed and ready to explode. Now I want you guys to give me a lot of space, to ensure the number of Police Widows doesn't multiply. I'm trying to earn money here, not the title of a mass murderer!"

"What do you want us to do?" asked the senior most officer there.

"Nothing. Just let poor Samir go back inside and I will let everyone go, once I got what is mine."

"Okay, lady. We are all friends here. Let's not do anything harsh. Okay guys, you heard her! Move back!" said the Chief.

"Do you want me to go back inside?" asked Samir.

"Yes I do, Samir. And close the door behind you."

As the employees gave a sigh of relief that the thing is over. They got even more paranoid when they saw Samir walking back inside with the bomb intact on his torso.

"Sorry guys. Guess you have to hold your breath a little while longer. This nightmare is not even closer to being finished!" cried Samir.

"Samir. You are a grown man. Don't cry, lamb chop. No one's getting hurt, FOR NOW!" mocked the voice.

"What else do you want from us? We already gave you all the money!" shouted the manager.

"All right, Fat Ass. I know you guys have have 250 Crores of Cash in your vault. So don't act stupid. It's simple, I will send you a few bank account details. You will wire the 100 crores with the specifications to the details that I will be sending as a text message to the phone Samir is holding. You can either lose 100 crores privately or 150 Crores publicly. Your call! Don't make me call again. Oh and Samir, once the money is transferred with ease, I will tell the Police to come in and disarm the bomb. Nice knowing you all, Good Bye."

*BEEP*

As the call ended and the text message popped up, the manager had no other go rather than transfer the amount and save his employees. But most importantly, saving himself! As the process finished,

*RING RING*

"Oh my god, the Bomb's phone is ringing!"

"Should we attend that? Or Not?" said Samir.

"Well what's the worst that can happen? Other than blowing up?" shouted Akshara.

"What are you saying?" asked Aadhi.

"I'm sick of all this torment. Attend it."

As everyone started to cover their faces and expecting a loud boom, instead they got this,

"Hello Petty Humans. This is your friendly neighborhood robber. There was no bomb strapped to poor Samir here. You can take off that vest now. I'm sorry for tormenting you all for all this time. But I did this because, I wanted claim something that is rightly fully mine or should I say ours. As your idiotic manager is looking at his monitor screen, all the money is being wired to various accounts around the world, which would be used... Well, I am not going to trouble you guys with the details. The money will be non-traceable and virtually non-existent to the naked eye. So please don't waste your time finding it. You can rather try giving loans at a lower interests rather than that. And By the way, every piece of art deserves its instigator's name etched on it. But what's the thrill in knowing my name? Cheerio."

"Wait. Is she serious about that? Can I really take this off?" Asked Samir.

"Alright People. Move back. Okay mister. Tell us whatever you know about that call! And we want the truth!" shouted the Police who stormed inside and wanted to make the best out of the rest of the things they had.

"I'm helpless. They tied this on me and made me do it."

"Well, we'll conclude that when we finish the interrogation. Now march! You two, go around and interrogate everyone. Someone has made fool of us and is free. I want suspects within 24 hours. NOW MOVE!"

A few days later,

"Glad that's over" said Akshara.

"Me too, to the only girl who has made me sweat!" toasted Aadhi.

"And to Samir, the one guy who I saw shit his pants in fear!" said Akshara.

"Anyone talking about us?" asked Samir.

"Yeah, we have single handedly pulled off the biggest heist in recent history!" said the Woman who was all smiles.

"The manager totally brought that crap. He is convinced of the whole thing and is not suspecting a thing! The thing where Akshara said to attend the call, was genius!"

"So, what do we do with the money?" asks Samir.

"I'm thinking of changing my name. The current one is not that great. An artist deserves a name that makes them stand out."

A little later on the news,

"City Police clean bowled with the whereabouts of the stolen money and proprietor- in- chief of this heist. Will we ever know what transpired inside that bank?"

From the Author of 'The Ashes of the Prey'

Kudos,

Karthik Sreeram Kannan

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