Chapter 20: Not A Coincidence

My lips moved on his mouth and Triangle was too surprised to react. Maybe he's too surprised that's why he didn't push me away or it's just that he doesn't want to push. I don't know how he looks like at the moment dahil mariin na pinikit ko ang mga mata ko.

I bit his lower lip and suck on it. Wala akong pakialam kung anong isipin niya dahil sa ginawa ko. Oo na, ako na ang malandi pero aaminin kong gusto ko ang ginagawa ko. I wanted more than sucking his lips. I want him to do the same to me.

My tongue brushed his tongue and like it's the first time, it's so surprising at puto, it really feels good! Mahigpit pa rin ang hawak ko sa kwelyo niya. His lips, tasted the same. Saka ko lang naramdaman ang hiya nang mapansin na hindi siya tumutugon sa ginagawa ko. I stopped moving but I didn't part our lips.

I heard him drew a deep sigh before he mumbled a cursed. "F*ck!"

At nagulat ako nang kinabig niya ang beywang ko palapit sa kanya. It was a cue for me to continue moving my lips and he also did. Gaya noong unang beses na hinalikan ko siya, he still lacks skills in kissing but his awkward kisses are so addictive that I didn't want him to stop.

Shit, anong nangyayari sa akin? Hindi kaya nahawa na ako sa impeksyon niya kaya gustong-gusto ko ang mga halik niya? Pusangina, hindi naman siguro makalawang 'tong tongue at lip ring niya diba?!

He groped my waist in a gentle way na para bang isa akong babasaging bagay. His unexpert kisses were so damn good that I don't know how long we've been kissing until we felt the need to stop and breathe.

Binitawan ko ang kwelyo niya at habol ang hiningang tinignan siya. Puto, sigurado akong si Tatsulok nga siya!

"You're Triangle..." wala sa sariling wika ko. It's more like I'm telling it to myself to prove that my hunch about him being his twin or cousin is wrong.

Inayos niya ang bahagyang nagusot na kwelyo. "Of course it's me, who do you think I am?"

Eh? Namumula ba siya? Naramdaman niya siguro iyon dahil tinapik niya ang pisngi at iniiwas ang kanyang mukha.

Ilang beses akong napakurap habang nakatitig sa kanya at maraming bagay ang tumatakbo sa isipan ko sa mga sandaling ito.

1) He’s really Triangle. I knew it. I can feel it.

2) Tiyak kong hindi siya si Gon. Hello? Kung si Gon pa siya, edi one inch bago dumapo ang labi ko sa labi niya, umiwas na siya. Pentagon wouldn't dare.

3) He’s not Trench. Paano ka nasabi? Wala, alam ko lang. Ramdam ko na hindi siya si Trench. Siya si Tatsulok pero puto, why is he treating me like a shit lately?!

Hindi ko alam kung dapat ba akong matuwa dahil siya nga si Tatsulok. Biglang nanginit ang gilid ng mga mata ko. Puto, kailan pa ako naging iyakin?! To prevent him from seeing my teary eyes, niyakap ko siya at isinubsob ko ang mukha ko sa dibdib niya. Pusangina, naiiyak talaga ako. For all the times that I ran with everyone, I realized I cannot do it alone. Everyone was with me. He was with me. We ran together.

His arms were on his sides at hinayaan akong sumubsob sa dibdib niya. Pinigilan ko ang mga hikbi ko at pinilit na makapagsalita nang tuwid.

“Pwede bang bumalik ka na sa dating ikaw? Pwede mo akong i-bully kahit sa anong paraan na gusto mo. Kahit na araw-araw mo akong paliguan ng pancake mix, ayos lang basta ba sa mga panahong kailangan ko ng kakampi, nandiyan ka pa rin.” Call me selfish or what, but I really want to keep Triangle... for myself. Tuluyan nang umagos ang mga luha ko. Putongpanis naman oh, sabi ng ayaw kong umiyak eh!

I waited for him to say something ngunit nanatili lamang siyang nakatayo at hinayaan ako. Pinahid ko ang mga luha ko at mas hinigpitan pa ang pagkakayakap sa kanya.

“Can we... can we try it? Hindi ngayon lalo na’t marami pang nangyayari pero pwede naman sigurong maging tayo diba? After everything, we can give it a try right?”

Pusangina, this is not me. Did i just indirectly ask him to be my boyfriend?! Inaamin kong lahat naman siguro tayo may tinatagong kalandian pero puto, I didn’t expect mine will reach this point.

Wala namang masama sa sinabi ko diba? I’m just being honest. It’s not wrong to do it either. Kaya iyong gawin ng lalaki kaya kaya ko rin. I just had the courage to tell him so so that the two of us will have something to look forward to. Puto, hindi na kami mga bata kaya ayaw ko nang magpaligoy-ligoy pa. I really admit I hate him before but Triangle was able to prove himself to me. He’s better than the jerk that he projects for everyone to see.

Bigla niyang kinuha ang mga kamay kong nakayakap sa likuran niya at tinanggal iyon. He didn’t even held my hand for so long and let it fall on my side. “I’m sorry.”

Napaawang ang bibig ko. Shit, did I just got rejected?!

“Y-you said you like me right?” No, I’m not begging but if I need to, I think I will.

“Dati,” sagot niya at yumuko. “Like I told you before, I’ll clean my own mess this time dahil ayaw kong maramdaman ng pinsan ko ang mga naramdaman ko.” His voice suddenly cracked. “This time, I’ll do things he did for me before. He likes you... anyway, you also like him right? So I think there wouldn’t be any problems.”

Puto, pinamimigay niya ako sa pinsan niya?! Hindi ko maiwasan ang pag-usbong ng galit sa dibdib ko. Pusangina, I’m not a freaking toy that he can give his cousin!

“Gago ka ba? Bakit mo ako pinamimigay sa pinsan mo?!”

“I’m not,” sagot niya. “I’m just going out of the picture so that everything will be easier for you two. Hindi mo naman ako gusto diba?”

I drew a deep breathe and prevented myself from bursting. I just confessed and then he’ll say hindi ko pa rin siya gusto?! What the pork, mukhang kumalat na nga yata ang impeksyon sa utak niya kaya nabobobo na siya!

Tila kusang umangat ang kamao ko at dumapo ang isang suntok sa mukha niya. Pusangina, masakit sa kamay! Ang tigas ng mukha niya but I’m relieved that the pain in my knuckles paid off after seeing blood at the side of his lip. His face was turned on one side at nanatili siya sa ganoong posisyon.

Gusto kong magwala pero puto, para saan pa? I guess I’m at fault here. He  stopped chasing or maybe he just can’t keep chasing after me. Kasalanan ko naman, tanggap ko pero ang sakit pala sa pakiramdam. What I want is to keep for myself him but he was never mine to keep.

Hinintay kong magsalita si Tatsulok ngunit aabutin na lang siguro kami ng umaga ay hindi siya magsasalita. Kinagat ko ang pang-ibabang labi ko at pinigilan ang paghikbi. I took a step backward and hoping a little that he’ll stop me. Humakbang ulit ako paatras ngunit wala pa rin.

Okay, I lost.

“A-ayaw mo n-na ba talaga sa akin?”

Tiningnan niya ako nang diretso. His ocean eyes look at me without hesitation. “I gave up.”

Pusangina, this is more painful than I thought. Tumango-tango ako bago tumalikod upang lumabas. Puto, how I hate people who start things and then leave everything behind! What’s his point in starting it kung ganitong susuko lang din naman pala?!

“Is that your final answer?” Puto, this is no game show pero kailangan ko lang maniguro dahil baka nagdadalawang isip pa siya. Pwede pang magbago ang isip niya.

“I’m sure,” he replied coldly.  He gave up already. Ayaw na niya dahil sa pinsan niya?! Ganoon siya kaduwag para hindi ipagpatuloy ang sinimulan niya! Duwag! Walang bayag!

I gritted my teeth as I unlocked the door at binuksan iyon. Nagulat ako nang makita sina Coco at AndE sa labas ng pinto at nababahalang nakatingin sa akin. Bago ako tuluyang lumabas ay muli ko siyang nilingon.

“So be it. Ito ang huling beses na tatanungin kita ng ganoon. Hinding-hindi na rin ako magkakagusto sa katulad mong walang bayag! Mas gugustuhin ko pa ang kalbong kagaya ni Coco kaysa sa katulad mo!”

Agad akong tumakbo palabas at hindi pinansin sina Coco na napasimangot dahil sa sinabi ko at si AndE. Bumalik ako sa silid ko at padabog na isinara ang pinto. I jumped to my bed at nagtalukbong ng kamot bago umiyak.
I spent the night crying as I think about it.

Puto, bakit ba ako umiiyak ng ganito?! Triangle doesn’t deserve my tears! I just gave him an offer for a deferred relationship and he declined! Alam kong hindi naman talaga lahat ng gusto natin ay nakukuha natin pero puto, ang sakit pala sa pakiramdam. I cried a river and let it all flow. I promised myself that I will focus on the Capital after this.

“Pwede ba Sunny matulog ka na,” narinig kong wika ni Megan na mula sa kanyang kama. “I can’t sleep hearing your sobs kahit ilang unan pa ang itakip mo sa mukha mo.”

Her voice was irritated. She’s still that bitchy Megan that I knew. Padabog na bumangon ako sa kama ko at umiyak pa rin. Naririnig naman pala niya ako kahit na tinakpan ko na ng unan ang mukha ko, kaya ano pang silbi ng pagtatakip? Mas nahihirapan lang akong huminga.

“Megahuhuhuhunnnn...”

Padabog na bumangon siya at binuksan ang kanyang lampshade. “Stop it.”

“Megahuhuhuhuhunnnn...”

“Stop torturing my name,” naiiritang sagot niya, “C’mon Sunny, stop crying at mas lalong wag mong isipin na iko-comfort kita. We’re not best friends.” She rolled her eyes and for a moment, I thought how could someone roll her eyes like she’s freaking delirious but still managed to look beautiful. Yup, that’s Megan Galendez everyone. Pero puto, hindi iyon ang concern ko ngayon!

Si Tatsulok! He rejected me.

“Meg--”

I said stop it.”

“Triangle rejected me,” I said in between my sobs. Puto, I really need to vent out all the pain I felt inside. Malapit na ang assessement at malapit na ang face-off kaya kailangan ko ‘tong mailabas lahat at nang sa gayun ay ayos na ako bukas o sa susunod na araw.

“That’s great,” sagot niya. Puto, mali yata ako ng taong nasabihan. “At least you know how he felt all this time.” I wiped my face with my fist at maang na napatingin sa kanya. She gave me a frown. “Why are you crying like that? Hindi ba iyon naman ang gusto mo?”

Iyon ang gusto ko... Iyon ang gusto ko... Triangle said the same thing, pero puto, can’t they tell that I had a change of heart? Dati ay ayaw ko kay Triangle, kulang na nga lang ay isumpa ko siya but fate loves to play and karma is a bitch.

“Dati.”

“Well, you can’t blame Triangle,” sagot niya at tumayo sa kama. Kinuha niya ang kanyang jacket at isinuot iyon. Sunod niyang kinuha ang kanyang backpack at lumuhod sa harap ng kama niya, she pulled something under her bed at pusangina, ayan na naman ang kanyang mga alak na nasa malaking box! She picked two bottles and grinned at me. “Let’s go?”

***

When Megan picked two bottles of alcoholic drink, it didn’t occur to me that we will drink one each. Pusangina, hindi man lang siya nagdala ng baso at pinilit ako na tunggain ang malaking bote gaya ng ginawa niya. In fairness, I think drinking like this feels better. Halos nangangalahati na kami ng iniinom namin ngunit wala pa ring nagsasalita sa amin.

Nasa rooftop kami, gaya ng unang drinking session namin. I wanted to say no to her kanina, but what Megan wants, Megan gets. She pulled me from my bed and it almost seems like a tug of war before we got here.

I feel like the alcohol was dominating my system when Megan grabbed my bottle.

“Hey!” protesta ko.

She grinned like crazy before she gave me her bottle and giggled. And yep, a giggling Megan is a drunk Megan. Pinagpalit niya ang bote namin at tinungga ang inumin ko. I frowned when I saw some lipstick marks on her bottle. Kahit medyo lasing na ako, I’m still sane at ramdam ko pa rin ang sakit sa pakiramdam. Who the hell said drinking alcoholic drinks will make you forget?! Hey man, what a scam!

I know words were more painful than swords but I didn’t realize Triangle could hurt me with words like I did to him. Nilingon ko si Megan na nakapikit habang dinadama ang pait ng alak.

“Megan, lashing ka na ba?” I asked. Uh, what’s wrong with my words?

She giggled like it was a very funny joke. “No, hindi pa.”

“You’re laughing.”

“That’s because I’m happy that I’m with my best friend,” sagot niya at inilapat sa pisngi ang bote ng alak. “Ikaw, lasing ka na ba?”

“Jusht tipshy.”

Tumawa ulit si Megan. “Wanna play?”

“No.”

If she’s not drunk, she would had probably replied with a sarcastic remark in her usual bitch tone. But she’s drunk and all I hear is her laughter. “C’mon, let’s tell each other more secrets.”

“Wala na akong shecret,” I replied before I brought the bottle to my mouth and took a sip. Napangiwi ako sa lasa. Mas mapait ang alak niya kaysa sa iniinom ko kanina.

“Then hear out my secrets,” she said with a laugh. Magulo ang buhok niya dahil nililipad iyon ng hangin. “Other than this,” ipinakita niya ang bote sa akin, “I have another best friend.”

“Owsh talaga, may besh friend ka?”

Tumawa siya ngunit nakita ko ang pagkinang ng kalungkutan sa mata niya. “Maybe not best friend but a good friend. Katulong namin siya.” ngumiti siya nang mapait at tumingin sa kawalan.

Puto, hindi ba ako ang may problema rito? But I’m still curious why she opened about her friend.

“She always looks at me from a distance at tititigan ako.” Tumawa ulit siya.

“Isn’t that creepy?” Kapag ako tititigan palagi, baka mag-freakout pa ako.

“At first I thought it was,” she said and laughed. Lasing na nga yata si Megan dahil mas marami pa ang tawa niya kaysa sa mga sinasabi niya. “But when I talked to her, she apologized at sinabing nagagandahan lang siya sa akin.”

I frowned. Sino bang hindi magagandahan kay Megan? Bulag lang ang hindi magagandahan sa kanya. I took another sip and waited for her to continue.

“Naging nagkaibigan kami dahil doon. She’s from 4th Ward at namamasukan lang sa amin. My parents don’t want me to befriend our housekeepers,” tumawa siya kasabay ng pag-iling. “But I still did. We became good friends in silent.”

“Oh, ashan na sha?”

Tinungga niya ang bote at pinahiran ang bibig pagkatapos ay tumawa nang malakas. “She’s gone.”

My eyes widen. “What?! Did you kill her?”

She laughed and shook her head. “Do I look like a killer to you?”

Tumango ako. “You look like you wanted to kill me anytime.”

Natatawang hinampas niya ako sa braso. “Of course, I do.” I cringed when I heard her reply. Sinasabi ko na nga ba!

"Shaan na nga shiya?" tanong ko ulit.

"Umalis siya sa amin. I tried looking for her but she disappeared for a while. Nang magtanung-tanong ako sa 4th Ward kung na nakabalik na ba si Thea, they said she'd gone mad." Tumawa ulit siya bago tinungga ang bote.

I felt sober all of a sudden. Saglit na nawala ang epekto ng alak sa sistema ko. Thea-- Megan's friend disappeared at nabaliw.

Puto, that's the same thing that I heard about Stella! Nawala siya sa 3rd Ward at sinabi ng kapitbahay namin na naging baliw na si Stella! I'm pretty sure this is no coincidence! Something's not right here!

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I love reading your theories and comments! Haha sorry for stirring your mind lol I left so many crumbs on every chapters at maraming revelations na mabubuo from those crumbs. RAFAYC still has a long way to go but I cannot wait to write the exciting parts! Some of you noticed those crumbs and yup, I didn't write each scenes for nothing hihihoho

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