my mama always told me that i have to get an 'a' for all classes that i have, and i don't know why

she said we need to suffer this world with an 'a' written proudly on a piece of paper that i will get once i finish university, and i still don't know why

i still remember the moment my mother mad at me because i have a really bad score that written on my report book back when i was still an highschool student

she started to compare me with my friend who get an 'a' for almost all classes, and said that i should be like her

i was hurting, but i didn't say anything anyway

i was crying and felt like a piece of trash, but i didn't show it to her anyway

"mama why i need an 'a'?" i ask her

"an 'a' is an oxygen, honey," she says, "you need it to continue your life in this cruel cruel world"

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march 17, 2018

[i don't know what is this, i just feel so much pressure lately and it drives me insane]