𝙾𝚌𝚝𝚘𝚋𝚎𝚛 𝟷𝟷𝚝𝚑, 𝙼𝚘𝚗𝚍𝚊𝚢
Parker's POV

The lunch tray slips from my hands and clatters on the table as I sit down. I exhale a long sigh and rub my eyes. My finger catches on a spot of dried sleep under my eyelash, and I scowl as I pick it off.

Griffin watches my actions as he slowly chews on potato chips. "Dude," he says around a full mouth, "did you just roll out of a grave?"

I scoff and peel the sticker off my pear, although he isn't that far off. I'll be honest. I've slept awfully the past two nights. My world has been turned upside-down within the past 48 hours.

Greysons' assistant coach keeps emailing me about winter football camps and conferences that I meet the criteria for. I know he will expect answers soon, but I don't have one to give him. Hannah messaged me on Instagram yesterday morning with a quick, I had fun talking with you last night :). Videos are circulating of Miles and Luke's street race, of which I'm tagged in a few because people saw me get in Miles car.

The worst thing that happened was Miles and I's little rendezvous.

I can't get the kid out of my head. I knew I should've kept space between us in the first place, but... I have no excuses.

If anything, I can't think of any reasons to hate him anymore. All I can think of is the water sliding down his dark skin, accenting every muscle in his body. His hair dripping over his face, and his deep brown eyes. The way he checked on me, even though I was the idiot who put myself in that situation. His scar inflicted by his own blood. His own father.

"Should we take that as a yes?" Rose pipes up from across the table.

Blinking, I look up from where I was absentmindedly rolling the pear around in my hands. "I'm sorry, no, I didn't. If I found myself in a grave, I'd stay there."

"Alright then. You need a therapist," Griffin says, shaking the crumbs out of the potato chip bag directly into his mouth.

"Isn't your mom a therapist?" Forrest adds as he walks over, giving Rose her daily kiss on the head before sitting down.

Griffin shoots Forrest a sharp look that could either be taken seriously or as a joke. "Your input doesn't have any weight at this table. Find someone who cares, Woods."

"Hey! I care!" Rose scowls and flicks a grape at her brother. He retaliates by flicking her off.

I shake my head at their banter and bite into my pear.

Atlas walks over with a smirk and sticks his hand out. I give him a high five as he walks past and sits down on the other side of Griffin. "You guys are arguing already? Can we please have one normal lunch?"

Griffin, Rose, and I speak in unison. "No."

"Wow. That was scary," Hannah says as she approaches the table and sits by Rose. I'm glad to see that she's actually wearing clothes today.

"It must be a weird family-tie thing," Rose replies and grins, waving her fingers at Ali as she takes her usual spot next to Hannah.

Atlas rolls his eyes and looks over his shoulder to search for Kendric, who's usually here by now. His face suddenly lights up. "Kendric! Miles! Get your asses over here!"

Son of a bitch. I feel like a helium balloon that's slowly losing air. I must have gone pale because Griffin looks at me funny, his eyebrows furrowed.

I swallow and take another uneasy bite of my pear to keep my composure, except the piece lodges in my throat. Nothing about this simple act of eating feels normal.

"What's up, boys?!" Atlas laughs and stands up to slap Kendrics palm, then claps Miles on the shoulder. "You're my hero, dude. You totally kept us in the dark on Saturday night! We all thought your black ass was in jail!"

My skin prickles uncomfortably at the way Atlas speaks to Miles. Atlas must get a pass since he's half black, half white. That, and Miles obviously doesn't care.

Miles laughs, and I hate how my ears focus on the sound like he's the only one in the room.

"Nah, it's not like that. You're trippin' if you think the cops can actually catch up with me. Old news, brother." Miles smiles and looks over the table, his steady gaze falling on me.

Oh, how I would kill to have his easy confidence. Every nerve in my body screams to hide under the table. It feels illegal to be near him and my buddies at the same time. The worst part is I can't act weird. I can't get worked up. The more normal I act, the better.

I inhale and force on that mask of assurance as I quirk my lips, tilting my head up at him.

Miles' shoulders relax. Only an inch, but he must have also been looking for that assurance, too.

"You talk a lot of game. Say, Luke! Want to bet another couple of bands on Miles? Let's find out if the other night was a ruse or not... Oh wait, you never paid him back in the first place!" Atlas hoots and slaps the table.

Sitting down at the other far end, Luke gives our group a crippling look and the middle finger. "That fucking money went to paying that officer to keep his mouth shut. Plug it, Atlas."

The only reason Luke didn't come over here and beat Atlas' head in is that Griffin is returning his energy. Not to cripple, though, but to kill.

"That's still a debt, my man!" Atlas calls back and grins at Miles. "Are you going to sit down or not?"

Griffin gets impossibly tenser on my left, like Miles joining our lunch table will set off a nuclear bomb. Or maybe I'm the one getting more worked up and I'm imagining things.

"Oh, yeah." Miles walks around my back, over to the other side of the table. Forrest shifts as Miles sits in the only empty spot next to him. "And don't worry about that debt shit. That stays between Luke and me. I was drunk as fuck, and it was a stupid choice to make."

I nod in agreement before I can stop myself. Stupid choice, indeed.

"Wise words, my guy." Kendric nods as well before smiling slyly. "Besides, you got a greater prize. Bragging rights." Our end of the table erupts in jeers and laughter. As if bragging rights have the weight of five thousand dollars.

I don't laugh. Instead, I smile and shake my head as I set my pear down. Glancing up again, my eyes fall on Hannah, who's already looking at me.

She smiles when she captures my eye and shakes her head as well, mouthing the word, Idiots.

My smile goes taunt.

Joshua leans over from the far side of Kendric and, blessedly, changes the topic as he sticks his hand out to Miles. "Hey, we never got a chance to meet yet. I'm Josh. I play football with these goons."

"Goons? Really?" I laugh as I look away from Hannah. Joshua waves me away, the corners of his mouth pulling up.

"Miles. Nice to meet you," Miles replies and sits up to shake his hand. His eyes slide across Kendric, Atlas, Griffin, and me. "I've already met all of you, so..." He turns to look at his side of the table.

Ali, Hannah's best friend, smiles shyly and waves at Miles. She must have missed the memo that he's gay because her cheeks go pink. "Alison, but please, call me Ali." She tucks her brown hair behind her ears.

Hannah is quick to speak after her. "And I'm Hannah." She smiles tightly. It's one of the fakest smiles I've seen on her face in a while.

Is she still jealous that I ran off with him instead of her the other night?

Miles nods and mumbles nice to meet you before looking at Rose and brightening. "Your Park's cousin, right? The one in history?"

Every single organ inside of my body melts into goop. That stupid nickname makes me shift my legs, and I pray that I'm not red as Rose gives me a quick, discreet, questioning look.

She and Griffin truly are twins because he gives me an equally-as-questioning look. The only difference is that he doesn't hide it. I can almost read his thoughts. What the fuck is that nickname?

Rose bounces back fast and gives Miles her brightest smile. "Yep! You got it! I'm sorry, I've wanted to introduce myself in the past, but you always leave class so fast."

"Don't even worry about it. Seriously, I promise that I'm not running away from you."

That sentence makes Forrest laugh. "Really? She is pretty scary." He loops his arm around Roses's shoulder and pulls her in close as he sticks out his other hand. "I'm Forrest. The shoo-in in the Graham-Miller family."

"Fuck no." Griffin scoffs. "You're the parasite that weaseled your way into the bloodline."

"Whew, shit." Kendric whistles.

"Whatever! Deep down, we all know Griffin loves me." Forrest winks as he and Miles shake hands.

"Almost as much as I love apple cider vinegar," Griffin hisses under his breath.

I roll my eyes as I set the pear core down on the tray, rotating over to my yogurt cup.

"Oh, Hannah!" Rose sits up and turns to face her, excitedly setting her palms down on the table. "Have the cheerleaders started on the homecoming signs yet?"

And there goes my appetite.

I hesitate with the spoon halfway to my mouth, my heart beating erratically. It's racing so hard that it affects my stomach, making it cramp in retaliation. I know that I look like a dummy with my hand frozen in the air, so I quickly take a bite and wince. It would be easier to swallow cotton.

No part of me wants to discuss football at this very moment.

My eyes disobey me and flash over to Miles as the girls start to squeal over homecoming plans. To my surprise, he's already looking at me from underneath his dark eyelashes.

Our gazes clash for a moment before he looks back down at his sandwich, his expression the epitome of a poker face. God, how I wish he were more expressive.

"Parker! Are you nervous about the game?"

I jolt at the same time Miles' words from the other night come back to me.

You're so anxious, always doing this little...

The memory of him jumping in the air with his limbs taunt makes me crack a smile. I don't dare look at him again in case he remembers the same thing. Hannah must think that smile was meant for her because she returns it back at me.

"Well," I start and set my yogurt down. I've been mixing it for the last minute, anyway. "Not really. It's not my first homecoming game."

"We have one more regular game this weekend too. It'll be a good way to get the nerves out," Joshua adds and takes a bite of his salad.

"More like getting the kinks out. Mr. I-never-get-tackled over here has been eating shit these past few practices," Griffin says and points his fork at me.

Our end of the table laughs and taunts me for a second, all of their voices rising at once. Quickly, accidentally, I seek out Miles again as my stomach twists. He smiles fleetingly at me, although little does he know that he is the reason why I've been getting tackled.

I rebound fast, tearing my gaze away as I laugh and slap the tabletop, despite my bubbling anxiety. "It's not like that! Don't put me in a bad light. If you boys aren't the ones averaging 600 passing yards per game, then I don't want to hear anything from your mouths."

Again, everyone laughs, and Kendric leans over the table to point at me. "Keep your game where your mouth is, boy!"

"Shit, I'll say," Calvin says from a few seats down. "Rumor has it that Oakland is rewriting their plays for each game. They don't want any teams to see what they have coming, and that's why they're also practically undefeated."

I stare at him and blink, letting the cold chill of anxiety wash down my spine before I respond. "Tell me, does anyone on their team have eleven D1 colleges offering them scholarships as a junior? No? Then I'm not worried."

"And that's facts!" Hannah laughs and leans over the table for a high-five while my teammates grin and jostle. I smile and reciprocate the gesture.

"Hard work beats talent if talent doesn't work hard," Luke retorts as he joins the conversation. "From what Griffin said and from what I've seen while driving past the fields on the way out of school, your team is going to have to work a lot harder."

Luke pauses and grins as he sees the look in my eyes, knowing he hit a chord. He continues. "You guys only played Oakland once, and the only reason you beat them was because of a field goal. I wouldn't talk so big, tough guy."

That yogurt in my stomach solidifies into a slimy ball. I'm fresh out of comebacks, thrown off by the feeling of Hannah looking at me and knowing that Miles is here with us, witnessing this tug-of-war.

"Okay, says the boy who got his ass tapped by a gay kid in an ancient car. Shut the fuck up." Griffin scoffs and takes a swig from his water bottle.

Luke bristles as the entire table erupts in laughter. Miles shrugs and keeps quiet, obviously unphased, as he takes a drink of water to hide his smile.

I despise his steady personality and the way I keep searching him out like an oasis in a desert.

The only reason why I keep doing it is that every single time, he's looking at me too.

Almost like we're there as a refuge for each other.