Through some sort of magic, Jessie managed to make money, passports and plane tickets to Japan appear in a box, outside their room, in the next hour.

Something rubbed Jimmy the wrong away about how that had happened, but he couldn't really tell why. There were so many blank spots, so many details that refused to surface from the black hole in his mind, that this seemed to be a weirdly specific thing to get worked up about.

So instead, he focused on figuring out how to apply dye to his hair. Jessie had bought a dark shade of red and suggested that he just randomly did highlights instead of dying it all. It sounded smart, but much easier than it really was. By the time he was done, the sink looked as if he'd slaughtered a pig in it and he had no idea if he'd applied it right since his hair was wet and everything looked black.

He didn't have much time to lose with this. They had to be at the airport in an hour and still needed to find transportation and pack their shit, all while he desperately fought not to collapse or throw up again. Withdrawal was a bitch.

One step at a time. Dye hair, pack bag, go to the airport. Maybe pass out on the plane if he really had to. But there was something about that which bothered him immensely as well. Everything churned inside him, like he was in a constant spinning motion. From time to time, he had to stop and focus on how his body was stationary to make sure the spinning was just inside his brain.

Shaking his head, he stepped back inside the room filled with destroyed furniture. Jessie had already cut her hair and was bending over their shared duffle bag, packing their new clothes and what little they'd had with them.

Jimmy's breath caught in his throat. He hadn't realized her red tank top had a plunging back since it had been covered by her hair. But what shocked him was not the revealing design of the clothing, but that he actually cared enough to notice now. His eyes took in the exposed skin and how the top had lifted above her hips.

A thin scar ran along her waist, on the left side. The sight pulled all the air out of the room, plunged him into an endless winter, and his vision darkened.

"We're losing, aren't we, hotstuff?"

Jessie yanked the knife out of a turned over table she leaned with her back against and passed it to him. "I'm fine."

Blood trickled between her fingers. She wasn't fine. He knew that now, but not back then. He thought he'd lost her and it killed him.

Paris.

"Hey, are you alright?"

Jimmy blinked and present Jessie appeared before him. Her hair was so short, only reaching her jaw, like an orange curly explosion. The image was confusing and unfamiliar, but she looked adorable.

The thought startled him and he closed his eyes again. But her face was still there, between rumpled white sheets. He did his best not to hurt her, to maneuver around the bandage on her waist. Because he still wanted to touch her. So much it was his sole purpose at the moment, everything he lived for.

"Jimmy?"

He opened his eyes again to a blurry room. Her eyes were wide and a little watery, as if she expected him to start throwing furniture again. Instead, the void inside him was much smaller because of her. In the blink of an eye, she seemed to glow.

"Who are you?" he whispered, though he had a feeling he already knew.

Her eyes widened even more and her lips formed a tiny O, obviously fearing that he'd relapsed and had actually forgotten her name. It was nothing like that. He just couldn't understand why his image of her had shifted so dramatically just because he saw a scar.

She was no longer a random person he was working with, who used to know him. She was... He shut his eyes tightly for a moment and opened them again. Nothing changed. There was still a warmth in his chest that threatened to set him on fire.

"What are you thinking, hotstuff?" She lay on her stomach, her back bare, half covered by her orange curls. The light of dusk made her skin glow.

He was thinking they'd messed up. He'd messed up. But he'd never been happier in his life. The emotions made no sense, but they were there. That feeling was overwhelming him now, something foreign, but so welcomed.

"Come on, don't do this to me," she said between her teeth. "I really don't want to slap you."

He shook his head and finally focused. "That won't be necessary. I just..." He had no idea what was happening. "Let's just... Do what we have to do."

She pulled her hands back and let out a sigh of relief. The light around her didn't dim. His skin felt colder once she was no longer touching him. What was wrong with him? What did all this mean?

"I've mostly packed. Just want to take a shower and change my clothes because who knows when we'll get to do that again. You should change, too."

He just nodded, his mind unpleasantly foggy. Her words sounded smart, and yet the thing that moved him was the shower. Why?

"I should maybe take a shower, too, then." Because she was right and even if he didn't care much now, maybe he would later

Something shifted in her gaze and she bit the corner of her lower lip. Then disappointment and pain shone in her eyes before she turned and entered the bathroom. He fought the need to go after her. 

His body was out of control, repelling the numbness, wanting things that didn't resonate with his brain. Wanting her. Lust. He was feeling lust for some reason. And the realization sent him down another spiral into nothingness.

His back hit the door and he shut his eyes, trying to drive the memories back. There were too many, flashes of images, sounds  and feelings circling him much too fast, like a swarm of bees, stinging every inch of him.

Everything hurt. His head spun and everything around him seemed to be floating in an endless void.

The void. The silence. The pain in his chest, in his lungs. Everything burned. The calculations.

"Jimmy?"

He opened his eyes. Jessie was already out, her hair wet, wearing a white tank top and a pair of large shorts that reached over her knees. The outfit was ghastly, reminding him of the 90s grunge era for some reason. And yet, she looked amazing. The lust inside him took over, buried the sense of nothingness.

"This actually looks good." She came closer to him and studied his hair. "You look hot. I mean... Well..." She pulled away. "Never mind. We should go. Take your shower and go change."

Without a word, he obeyed because he needed that shower. Unfortunately, it didn't clear his head or made her any less atractive when he returned to the room. It was so strange to feel things.

"I packed everything," she announced, not even turning to him. "We should really be going. By the way, you're name is Jamie now and I'm Josie." She passed him the new passport.

He took it, keeping his gaze trained on her. She looked at him too, and a mild blush spread across her cheeks, making her look even more attractive.

"The skater boy image actually looks good on you."

He narrowed his eyes. "You too, unexpectedly. But then again, I think anything would look good on you."

Her blush intensified and she turned away, rummaging in the envelope which had contained the passports.

"We also have a contact in Japan, so that's a good first step," she said. Her tone sounded too cheery.

Jimmy nodded and opened the passport. It had an older picture of him, the one which was probably in his real passport since he remembered seeing it before. Except his name now was Jaime Callahan and he was a California native.

"Huh, intelligent move to give us names similar to our real ones," he observed.

"Yeah, just in case we slip and call each other by our real names. Yours works better." Jessie frowned at her own passport.

He came next to her and noticed why. Her name was Josie Callahan. He raised an eyebrow.

"Are we supposed to be siblings or..."

She turned over the envelope and two wedding rings fell out. "Apparently not. Thanks a bunch, Phillip," she muttered under her breath.

He bent and picked up the rings, his mind spinning. It was a good plan, since they hardly looked similar, but there was a lot more to it than that.

"Give me mine," she said with a sigh, reaching out her hand.

He looked at the rings in his palm.

I should've asked her to marry me.

Jerry had been surprised, asked if he was sure. At the moment, he had been sure, but then everything went to hell and he'd been locked up and now... He raised his eyes to her. There was uncertainty there, maybe a bit of fear as she waited.

He stood and took her hand, then slipped the ring on her finger. It felt so right. The foreign feeling inside his chest only grew in intensity as his faulty memory finally connected the pieces.

Paris.

But it never started in Paris. There, it just went to a whole other level.

"Thanks," she whispered, pulling her hand back and looking at the ring.

He couldn't say anything in a moment when the word love was starting to mean something again. He was still mostly numb, but he now knew there had been something between them, something that still tugged on his heart. He had a heart.

Jessie picked up the luggage, but he took it from her. With a small smile, she grabbed the backpack with the stolen laptop instead.

They finally left the hotel room behind. It was confusing. Something kept nagging him and he couldn't tell what it was. It still had something to do with Paris and the serum and his feelings and the madness inside him.

The numbness, the lack of feelings, the pain...

Dear Jessie, dear Jessie, dear Jessie...

The letters. So many letters to her.

Who are you? Who were you?

But as they rushed through the hotel lobby, Jessie deftly dropping the backpack, he couldn't ask. They had a job to do, people to save. And he had to come out of this state of limbo where everything felt blurry. Like he knew and didn't know at the same time. Felt, and yet felt nothing. Understood, but was at a complete loss.

His life was a mess, and the only light in it was Josie Callahan.

🏯

The airport was blissfully crowded, so Jessie honestly hoped no one would notice them in the sea of people. She'd pulled a hoodie over the tank top and had the hood over her hair to hide the color, while Jimmy had put on a pair of sunglasses.

She really hoped he was less recognizable because of the clothes and the reddish hair. It looked amazing on him. Everything did. And as he slowly came out of his shell and started remembering snippets, it was so hard not to hold him, kiss him.

It became even harder when he took her hand and they walked together, heading for their gate.

It's just for show. He doesn't feel anything yet.

But he'd put the fake wedding ring around her finger, and in that moment, she was sure she'd stupidly faint. It was a new record because she never thought her heart had the capacity to feel so much pain and so much happiness at the same time.

Stop thinking about that. Just focus on the mission. Appreciate and work with what he can actually remember.

And yet, as they waited in line and she looked up at him, butterflies filled her stomach and her heart sang. It was Jimmy. Her Jimmy, even if in withdrawal and with memory issues. He was less tense and his mannerisms was falling back into what it used to be. He wasn't a robot anymore. And because of that, she was more in love with him than ever.

Get a hold of yourself. He keeps asking who you are.

So she kept quiet and inched forward as the line progressed. But the fact that he still held her hand made everything seem much easier. She wasn't even that tired anymore.

In no time at all, they were at the gate, waiting for the boarding call. They sat next to each other, Jimmy still holding her hand. His grip suddenly tightened.

"Are you okay?" He was probably fed up with that question, but she didn't have a better one.

"I..." He let go of her hand and leaned back in his chair, covering his eyes. "It's hard to explain."

She believed it was. Getting random flashes of memory while trying to fight off drugs couldn't be easy. Not having a sense of self... It had to be horrible.

"Try me," she said nonetheless because it was her job to break him out of it.

"My memories make no sense. I know they should, I know they're logical, but I can't put them together. If I try too much, I lose them."

Yes, that sounded like a bitch. "How's the hole doing?"

"Getting smaller. But I'm starting to be afraid of losing it. It's all I know. My battle against it is what keeps me grounded. It's how I know I'm myself."

She wanted to hug him, hold him against her, kiss his fears away. "Look at it another way. When it's gone, you'll truly be yourself."

"I know." He let out a sigh. "But at this moment, that seems impossible, Josie."

The name threw her off until she remembered it was her cover. "Nice one, Jaime."

He took his hands off his face and grinned at her. He looked so much like her Jimmy in that moment, she almost lost it.

"What's our story?" he asked, breaking the spell. "Are we on our honeymoon?"

She shrugged, doing her best not to read into it. "Why not? The most cliché and believable story ever."

He hummed, drumming his fingers on his chin. "I don't know why you married me. I'm a terrible husband."

"Um, what?"

He nodded towards her hand. "Where's your engagement ring? If I was too cheap to get you one, you shouldn't have married me."

Even if she tried to keep it in, she actually laughed. "Maybe I'm the lousy wife and left it at home."

He leaned towards her, so close their noses almost touched. Jessie's heart went into hyperdrive, her breath uneven.

"You could never be lousy," he whispered.

She wanted to kiss him so badly, it hurt. How long had it been? A year? More than a year because the last time it happened, he was leaving for outer space. Where it all went wrong and he'd come back without any recollection of who he was. Of who she was.

Who are you?

His question suddenly made sense, except he had to figure that out on his own.

"How did you get the serum, Jessie?" he asked, his voice low and so intimate.

"Why are you asking this now?" Her words came out weak and shaking.

"Paris," he whispered. "I gave it to you, didn't I?"

"In more ways than one," she said before she could stop herself. She winced the moment the words were out, all their meanings out there in the open.

"I'm sorry," he said unexpectedly. "I was young and didn't know what I was doing."

Her eyes widened. "Wait, are you apologizing for sleeping with me?" Screw subtlety. He obviously remembered or he wouldn't have asked her.

He smirked and it sent her heart into her throat. "No, just for the serum thing. I have a feeling that if I had to apologize for the other part... I'd have a lot of apologizing to do."

"You remember?" And why did that make her so happy?

"I sort of know it happened, though I can't really... remember."

"That's okay. Don't try to explain."

"I couldn't even if I tried." He took her hand again and squeezed.

She squeezed back, trying to wrap her head around the fact that he remembered they were intimate. What did that mean? Maybe it didn't matter right then, but she needed every tiny bit of comfort he could offer. She needed him back.

His grip tightened until it hurt. She instantly snapped out of her thoughts and looked around, expecting to see someone heading for them or pointing a gun at them. All was normal.

She turned to him, ready to ask, but noticed his forehead was once again covered in sweat.

"Jimmy." She took his sunglasses off and he raised his eyes to her. His pupils were huge, which was definitely not a good sign. "Stay with me. We're almost there. You can sleep on the plane."

With obvious effort, he nodded just as boarding started. They could do this. She helped him stand, pretending they were a young couple unable to keep their hands off each other and managed to get in the plane first.

The moment they dropped in their seats, him next to the window, Jimmy let out a pained moan.

"Where does it hurt?" she whispered.

"Everywhere," he said, voice strained. "I feel like I'm on fire."

Shit. She had nothing to ease his pain, and he couldn't even lay down. But they had no choice. They had a fifteen hour flight ahead of them. All she hoped was that he wouldn't get violent anymore. Though as the plane filled and finally took off, he passed out.

She removed the armrest between them and tried to make him as comfortable as possible, but it was impossible in the tiny space. A pillow and tiny blanket could only do so much. The sense of uselessness smothered her, but the worry only managed to trigger her own exhaustion, so she ended up dozing off, waking up in a panic and taking his vitals, and feeling like crap for not keeping a lookout. Though if there was someone who wanted to harm them on the plane, it wasn't like there was anywhere they could escape.

As the hours dragged on, she found herself caught in a nightmare in which Jimmy wouldn't wake up anymore. Or would and no longer remember anything. If that happened again, she was screwed.

Better than him dying.

He wasn't going to die. She was just very tired, scared and stupid. But her stomach sunk into the floor every time she jerked awake and took his pulse. Her hands shook worse with each check because the closer they came to their destination, it was obvious that he'd been out for a very long time.

"Please wake up," she whispered, prodding his abs to check his liver.

He grabbed her hand and she nearly jumped out of her skin.

"It's really lackluster when you do that," he said.

She raised her eyes, her heart still thumping with fear. The moment her gaze meet his, it was a whole different type of thumping. His eyes glowed in the weak light of the led strip, looking like molten chocolate.

"Um, what...?"

"When you touch me clinically. "

Shit. She was about to start melting, too. "I'm sorry. I just wanted to--" She forgot what she wanted to say when he tightened his hold on her hand.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Tell you what?" she stammered.

"Who you were."

Do you know now? But she still didn't feel like it was the moment to ask him that or tell him any more on the subject. Knowing was one thing, feeling something a completely different one.

"It's something you needed to figure out on your own." She shrugged as if it wasn't her whole world, as if it meant nothing.

"True." He leaned closer, resting his head on top of hers. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" She should stop shaking. Stand tall and strong. But this was killing her. She needed him so much right then when everything was uncertain and they could be walking into a trap.

"For forgetting. For what you must've gone through. For what you're still going through."

Tears filled her eyes and she leaned her head against his chest. The rhythm of his heartbeat was so familiar, even after all this time.

"I'm sorry, too. For leaving, for thinking I would want to live without you."

He slipped his arms around her and squeezed her against him. The closeness had the tears sliding down her face. She'd longed for this for so long and now that it was finally happening, it felt unreal. Her heart was so filled with love, it felt about to explode.

"I know," he whispered into her hair. "I know you had to. It's okay."

"This is not your fault either, you know."

"It is. On some level, it is. Even if I can't remember why."

She pulled back to look at him, suddenly cold. Because he did know something. Something that had made him the perfect person to experiment on. But the look on his face didn't betray anything. He just looked like Jimmy. Her Jimmy.

"Are you...?"

His smile widened. "Better? Yeah. That hole is really small now. And I remember a lot of other things. Not everything, and my feelings are still majorly mixed up, but..." He tilted his head.  "I would kiss you right now if I didn't feel like throwing up again."

Jessie just stared, not sure how to react to that. A part of her wanted to laugh, the other wanted to cry. But she knew she had to wait, to give him time. Because unlike the supposed treatment from the Agency, this seemed to be working.

"Do it when you want it," she said.

"Thanks. I want to do it when I'm one hundred percent sure I mean it."

"Sounds like a plan." And with him awake, she could finally close her eyes and sleep for the few hours they had left.

After all, who knew what awaited them once they landed?

🏯🏯🏯

First off, I really had fun with the name of this chapter.

Second... That song fits so well and I love it so much for this story that it would've probably given the title of the book if I hadn't found it after I started writing, lol. But yeah...

So, we're back to Jimmy and Jessie who are... um, doing stuff? They do need to get to the others, and I believe this was a well deserved break after the intensity in the last chapter. Anyway, since I have people to bring together, it might take a while before we get back to the prison bunch. Plus, ya know, that chapter actually had a time skip and I have to have the other peeps catch up.

Any thoughts on this are welcomed. Jimmy is getting better. There is hope. Or will I hit you over the head with something? I guess you'll have to read and find out.

Don't forget to vote and comment with love.