-• we owe it to her •-

Vivaan

The regret is so vivid in dad's eyes that for a moment I consider consoling him, but then remembering he could have prevented everything if he had just geared up the courage to stand against every wrong, nothing wrong would have ever happened, neither to us, nor to that poor little kid.

Turning around, I climb the stairs and enter the palace. There was a time I dreaded coming back home. It felt safer at the hospital. Things were in my control there, I was able to think with a clear head in my workspace.

Times have changed.

Coming back home no longer evokes negative emotions in me. Opposite actually, it's now the highlight of my day.

Taranya might not be aware of the change she brought into our lives, but she has made this palace livelier with her sweet giggles and bright smiles. Childhood here was never looked upon fondly, it was never protected fiercely. While Yuvraaj and I did our best to give a good childhood to Agastya and Yuvaan, their difference in thoughts regarding our mother never let them understand each other. I'd blame it on me. Yuvaan was only ten when he found what she did to me and Yuvraaj, and considering we always had only each other to rely on, the thought of his own mother almost killing his elder brothers was enough to set him off.

The hatred we all feel for her goes so deep that if it could be touched, scars would be scattered on our hands like constellation of stars.

He's not wrong in his place.

But so isn't Agastya.

He wants to believe our mother was a good human, and that's what every child would want. When there are no memories to cling onto after a person leaves you, you seek their presence in the things they left behind and in the stories this world tells you about them.

He already has a father that couldn't be father enough, it's only fair to let him believe his mother was not a bad person.

"Good evening, sir," I hear a breathy voice say as a figure walks past me.

It makes me stop in my tracks before I turn around and guess the retreating person. "Zoya?" The woman in red halts, then turns and nods politely, confirming my doubt. "Is Bhai home already?" I frown. It's only six in the evening. Bhai generally comes home at seven forty five, fifteen minutes prior to the dinner.

"Yes, he had to meet Shourya." She replies softly.

"Did Bhai make Shourya come back before the vacation could end?" I demand.

She shakes her head. "No, sir, Shourya sent an email the day before yesterday to keep the jet ready for his departure. I believe it was his own decision."

"What did he call the kid for?" I inquire curiously.

"I'm afraid I don't have an answer to that." She forces a guilty smile on her face.

"Alright," I nod. "Sorry for holding you back." I say apologetically.

"Please don't. I'm always ready to be at your service." She says, certainty in her voice. "Excuse me," then she turns and walks off.

I stuff my hands in the pockets of my trenchcoat and watch the woman stride off. She's so feminine. I wonder how she managed to get the position of a bodyguard for someone like my brother. He doesn't need protection from anyone. If anything, everyone around him needs protection from him.

Dad walks in just as she exits through the double doors. He looks at me for a moment before glancing over his shoulder at her retreating figure. "Interested?"

I chuckle. "No. I was just wondering how can someone like her take down three men in less than five minutes?" The story, told from Agastya's perspective when he was a kid, and had watched his brother's secretary effortlessly beat up three men still repeats in my head everytime I see her. I think, it's from then my young brother started fancying older women. She's to blame.

"Someone like her? Why? Does she not look like it?" When he's close enough, I turn around and walk alongside him.

I shrug. "She looks the type to go on riverside picnics with her two poodles, not the kind to stand in the ring and growl and beat up hulk like men."

Dad laughs. "Yeah, well, why don't you try that theory out?"

"What?" I raise a brow at him.

"Can she take down the Hulk like men?" He wags a finger at me.

"First of all, I'm not Hulk like. Second of all, no thanks. I'm precious."

He rolls his eyes.

"What?" I look at him offended. "Ask my patients. They call me God."

He nods, pretending to believe for my sake. We part ways on the ground floor. "See you at dinner," I call after him, climbing the stairs to the second floor. He waves back, disappearing inside the hallway.

"Perry!?" I call out upon reaching my room. The door at the end of the west wing opens and the golden retriever comes bounding out to greet me. His ears flap like wings, tail wags left and right, and his tongue hangs from his open mouth. I grin, crouching to my knees and ruffle his fur, kissing the top of his head. "Hi- five!" I hold up my hand. He quickly sits on his hind legs and raises his front right leg for a Hi-five. "Good boy, time for treats." Digging through my pockets, I take out the small pouch of treats and feed him one.

"Perry!" We both flinch hearing Yuvaan holler.

"Did you break something?" I squint my eyes at the dog.

He looks away, a hundred percent guilty.

"You're on your own!" I get up and scurry inside my room just as Yuvaan's door opens and he comes storming down the hallway, the pounding of his feet capable of shaking the tallest of mountains. I've no idea how they keep up with each other. One has too much energy and the other has absolutely none. They are two completely opposite personalities that should never get along. But humans. We love everything toxic.

"What the hell, Perry!? You broke my vase! Do you know how many hours I spent making it perfect -" I open the door, stopping my younger brother abruptly. He looks up aggravated, meeting my eyes and I clear my throat. It's not fair how physically he's nothing like Bhai but if there was a competition of who could sport the most grumpiest face in the existence of the mankind, it'd end in a tie between them both. "What?" He demands harshly, his onyx eyes darkening more. Or maybe it's just the lack of light.

"Can you please take your personal problems back to your room?" I request softly. "I'm sure it's not advisable to disturb your neighbours with your domestic issues when you share a floor." I add diplomatically.

He snorts and picks up his dog, stomping back to his room. Perry looks at me over my brother's shoulder, his doe like eyes wide, desperately seeking my help. "I'm with you!" I mouth to him, "From my room." And add softly before closing the door.

Putting on some music, I grab my clothes from the wardrobe and head inside the bathroom for a quick shower.

I can't wait for the London trip. We were supposed to surprise Tara, but Dad being the party pooper, ruined my entire planning because he just could not see his daughter sad.

Turning off the shower knob, I grab the towel from the holder and wrap it around my waist. As soon as I open the door, the steam escapes the confines, permeating the room with misty fog. I stand in front of the basin and grip the edges, leaning in closer to check whether I need to shave. I definitely some trimming but maybe later. I'm feeling lazy today.

Getting off, I exit the bathroom and toss the towel on the bed before putting on some fresh clothes. I blow dry my hair and thread my fingers through the messy strands, pushing them back as they stubbornly fall over my forehead. Eventually, I give up and wear the slippers, grabbing my phone from my coat before heading downstairs for dinner.

I sigh exasperatedly seeing the three men seated on their usual chairs. As soon as the kids left for their vacation, the house felt like a mortuary by how cold and silent it became overnight.

"Yes, we know. We feel it too." Yuvaan looks up at me tiredly.

"I should have just tagged along with the kids." I say regrettably as I make my way over.

"You've duties." Bhai states.

"I realised that as soon as I became an adult. But thanks for reminding me." I smile sarcastically and flip over the plate, serving myself with whatever was on the dining table.

"Let me know when you're planning to fly to London. I'll ask my secretary to book the tickets."

I set the spoon aside. "You're not coming?" My tone drops low.

Bhai sighs. "I've work."

"We all do." I grit out. "And I'm sure your work can wait. It's not that anyone's dying without you there?" I tilt my head mockingly at him.

Dad tenses as the air in the room thickens with the pressure of his two eldest sons preparing themselves for a verbal war. But I'm not giving up this time. Our siblings are shifting to a different country, God knows for how long. I'm sure he can produce a little time from his busy schedule to spend together before we leave them alone seven seas across. Everyone works, everyone wants to do best in their profession, heck sometimes I've to spend nights in a row at the hospital, but I know where my priorities lie. And my siblings are never coming second in that list. I hope he sorts out his priorities too, because his obsession for power is starting to get out of hands.

"Things are not great -"

"I don't care how things are at the office, Bhai. We want your time. And you better have it for us." I warn him.

"They won't even notice-"

"They will." I state. "You know, I know, everyone knows, they'll notice. Because trust me Bhai, once they stop noticing, you'll be the first to know."

He exhales deeply. "I'll see what I can do."

"I'm not hearing your excuses on the day of the departure." I make myself clear.

"Alright, eat." He commands, sounding frustrated.

Rolling my eyes, I pick up the spoon and resume my dinner.

"Did you hire a cleaning company there?" Yuvaan speaks up when the tension between us has settled down. "The kids will be in school half of the day and I'll be in my room. We can't rely on each other for household chores."

"They're basic survival skills, Yuvaan. Everyone needs to have them." I say disappointedly.

He scoffs. "I'm sorry but I'm not going along to work my ass off as their nanny."

"I've hired one. They'll come every afternoon to clean up and run errands." Yuvraaj cuts in before I could one up him with another remark.

"And the cook? None of us, except Tara, knows how to cook." Yuvaan says sounding worried.

In the world, where problems like global warming and poverty exists, my brother's main concern is who's going to feed him because he doesn't know how to cook for himself.

"He'll come eventually," Bhai nods.

Yuvaan frowns. "What do you mean?"

"He's taking his time." Yuvraaj replies.

"Time for what?"

The eldest deadpans, "Time to be found."

Dad and I snicker.

"Bhai-"

"Eat. There's time before you leave. Stop throwing tantrums already." Bhai instructs him sternly.

We don't even realise when that time passes by, and the day arrives, scheduling us to catch a flight at six in the morning so we can reach London before the rest.

Taranya, with her wittiness, makes the exhaustion of the long flight wear off like it never existed. Currently, we're on our way to the penthouse we own here, and given the silence in the car, nobody is really looking forward to this new beginning that's to begin apart from each other. I reach over to place my hand on top of Agastya's. He has been staring forlornly at our baby sister and the twins since the time we left the restaurant. I can tell how much he hates leaving the little ones behind.

Agastya turns his head and plasters a pained smile on his face, shaking his head to dismiss the worry clouding my face. I wrap my arm around his shoulders and pull him close, rubbing his arm warmly.

The black limousine enters the driveway of a skyscraper, each floor of which is owned by affluent people of the current economy. Bhai spent a whopping one billion and a few hundred million to write that penthouse under our name.

When the elevator directly opens to reveal the five bedroom penthouse, I see Taranya's mouth drop in shock. "What the fuck?" She ignores the dog that comes bounding over, before he gravitates to his owner.

"Taranya." Bhai says sternly, being the last to walk out of the elevator.

She clasps her hands together, them being clutched close to her chest as she smiles sheepishly. "Sorry, it felt like I was dreaming."

"I'm taking my old room." Yuvaan says from the other end of the living room, already on his way with his stuff, Perry following the suit.

"You guys already have rooms here?" She asks in awe.

"Yeah, we've been here on vacation quiet a few times." Agastya shrugs nonchalantly.

"To think there was a time when we were in the same city but didn't even exist for each other." She chuckles softly, her eyes staring into the distance.

Our smiles fade. Dad looks the guiltiest among us.

"I didn't say that to make you guys depress." She rolls her eyes, smiling despite the flash of sadness that crosses her deep blue eyes. "I'm just saying. There was a time we didn't know each other, and now there's a time we can't live without each other." Her smile widens, now genuine, beautiful, livelier.

The tension in the room thins out and we all smile at her.

"Now tell me! Where's my room?"

"C'mon, I'll show you!" Agastya gets up from the couch, beckons the twins along, and takes the little ones to show their rooms.

"I'll head to my room." Bhai mutters. "Vivaan, you can share a room with me tonight. Dad, you share the room with Yuvaan." He instructs and turns to leave.

"I told Tara," Dad says, stopping us in place, clueless to his revelation.

"Told her what?" Yuvraaj narrows his eyes.

Dad swallows visibly. "I accidentally blurted it out, I'm sorry. She looked pretty shaken up though she held it well-"

"What did you exactly tell her!?" Bhai loses his calm fairly quick, impatience lacing his low baritone.

"That she tried to drown you." He casts his gaze down in regret.

I freeze in place while Bhai stands speechless. "Wh- What?"

"It's just- I didn't mean to. The way I said it was horrible too. God, I'm sorry. She said something and I was suddenly reminded of that night. I regret it." He looks between us, his voice dejected.

That's the man we have as a father. Whose regrets are greater than his responsibilities. The responsibilities, that we as his eldest sons have been carrying for the last three decades. The last thing we expect from him is to mourn about his past and include the innocents in it. What's gone is never coming back, then what's the point in making someone else touch the unhealed wounds?

"She already knows about Vivaan." Bhai curbs his voice to tone down, but I know he's one step away from unleashing his rage. He can't condone mistakes. Especially from the one who has wronged us from the time we started gaining understanding of this cruel world. "What compelled you to reveal a fragment of my past to her?" He demands angrily.

Dad ducks his head low. "I'm - I don't know how I forgot that I was talking to her. It's just struck a memory and I-"

"Stop. Not a word." Bhai grits out. "I can't stand hearing your vague excuses anymore." He shakes his head in disappointment, before his gaze comes to halt on me. "And you were asking me to consider forgiving him?" He asks rhetorically.

"Dad, what is wrong with you?" I ask our father wistfully. "Why would you tell a seventeen year old that her step-mother tried to drown her eldest brother in a bathtub?" I step closer, hurt evident in my tone. "There's no way you can tell this to a kid without traumatizing them."

He nods, accepting each word we hurl at him. Like always. "I know. I admit it was my mistake. I've no excuses to make."

"Of course, you don't." Bhai rakes a hand through his hair, looking frustrated with our father. "Of course, you don't!" He finally bursts. I step forward and hold his arm, hoping in vain that he calms down. "Because if you did," his voice thickens and I see the way he breathes hard, struggling to keep his emotions inside, "If you did, I'd not be standing here hating you from every fibre of my being!"

Dad's eyes tear up. I feel torn between the two.

But then our attention is stolen by the sweet giggles and loud laughs that fill the empty penthouse from all corners. Something that was rare in Chauhan family, happiness, is now a frequent guest in our lives.

"Did you hear that, Dad?" I whisper. "We owe this to her." I add softly.

He sniffles, his chest rising as he sucks in a shuddering breath.

"She shouldn't know the past, Dad. Those evil days doesn't deserve someone as pure as her looking back at them with heartbroken eyes." I say, my voice heavy with emotions. "It's been so long since we've heard them laugh, smile, and simply be happy."

"Now listen to me carefully," Bhai says sternly, causing dad to lift his eyes. "No one, and I mean no one, is taking that away from them. Do you hear me? No one. Not even our past." He states firmly before storming off to his room.

"It's my fault. I'm sorry." Dad apologises again.

My heart gives in and I walk closer, wrapping my arms around his broad figure. He rests his forehead on my shoulder, letting the tears roll down freely his eyes.

"Perry, you menace, go back to the hell you crawled from!"

"Perry, don't forget to drag her along!" Agastya exclaims.

"Hey, no, leave my dress, you son of a Satan!" We hear Taranya growl before her brothers laugh harder.

"You're right." Dad pulls away, a rueful smile on his face. "We owe it to her."

I don't know why I felt his pov was important here

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