HOME IS WORSE

We advise that you listen to: Softcore by The Neighborhood...

September 2012, Age 14

Violet sauntered into her mother's flat. It reeked of cigarettes and alcohol. She tip-toed to her bedroom ignoring her mother sleeping naked on the couch. She opened the window airing out her room. A roach crawled on the wall making her cringe.

She sat on her bed that was on the floor taking out her homework. She was halfway through her math assignment when a loud knock made the door hinges shake. Her mother's boyfriend Ray, who they moved to London for, called out.

"Bitch, I know you're in there."

Violet quietly locked her door, pushing her desk chair up against the lock for extra security. She quickly changed her clothes into something more comfortable. She grabbed her journal and looked out the window to the fire escape.

Her mother's yelling in the back made her more eager to leave. With one foot out the window, Violet continued down the fire escape. She huffed when she landed on the concrete street. London was confusing as fuck.

Violet made her way deeper into her neighborhood. She pulled on the strings of the Adidas jacket. Her bookbag felt heavy with all its contents. She saw a small public library. Her smile widened as she found the quiet area.

She pulled out her homework trying to finish it. When she looked up darkness had taken over the sky. Violet quickly packed up. The cold September air made her shiver. She couldn't remember the streets. They were in opposite ways compared to the US.

"Excuse me." She went to ask a street vendor a question.

The man shook his head waving her off. She sucked her teeth trying to remember the way she came. Violet didn't have a cell phone. She had to rely on instincts. She just needed to find the hood.

Violet crossed the street passing a group of boys. She silently prayed that they wouldn't say anything to her. One of them got up and approached her, "Yo! Where you going?"

"High Towers." She kept her answer short.

He laughed pulling on her arm, "Ohh, how you like the slums? Heard all the Black bitches that live there got the best pussy."

Violet scrunched up her face, "Let me go."

"Uh-uh, you stay here."

Her eyes widened when he pulled a switchblade from his pocket. It shined in the moonlight. She stepped back only for him to point the blade at her, "What you got on you?"

"Nothing."

Violet's brown eyes searched the street for help. She sighed in relief when she saw him.

"Let her go Manny." The boy from the bathroom spoke.

Manny sucked his teeth, "You know her?"

"Yeah, buzz off."

Manny, the wannabe let her go, "I really wanted to teach someone a lesson tonight."

Violet rubbed her aching arm stepping back. The teenage boy grabbed her arm pulling her forward, "You gotta be careful walking out here at night. Shit ain't all sweet."

"I know that. I'm trynna get to High Towers."

He looked at her, "That's like fifteen minutes away. You walked all the way to another neighborhood?"

Violet tugged on her bag avoiding eye contact with him, "I had to go to the library."

He scoffed, "Why?"

"Homework."

He shook his head waving her along, "I'll show you the rest of the way."

Violent walked silently next to him. His curly hair was in a bun. He wore jeans and an oversized hoodie. A shiny silver chain sat on his neck.

"I'm not from here, so thank you." She said quietly.

"I know."

She laughed, "I guess you've saved me twice now."

He didn't laugh back, "Look, next time there won't be any saving. Learn about where you are and whose around you."

Violet was getting irritated, "You think I don't know that? Back in the US shit like that happens all the time."

"But you're in London now. And you're green as fuck."

Violet scrunched her nose up as they came up on her building. She looked up at the building noticing her apartment lights were on.

"Thank you..."

"You can call me Cench."

Violet smiled noticing his face for the first time, "Okay. I'm gonna find out your first name because that sounds ugly."

He laughed sending her into oblivion, "Have a safe night Violet."

She entered her apartment sneaking inside. Her mother's record player played the Jackson 5 album. Violet nodded to the music stealing a slice of pizza from the open box.

Her mother came out smelling like cheap perfume, "Where you been?"

"Library."

"I'm going out."

Violet chewed her food, "Where?"

"Working with the ladies tonight." Violet knew what that meant.

"Ma-"

Her mother cut her off, "Don't start. I moved back here because I left to chase your no-good father. London is my home. And now it's ours. Deal with it."

Violet watched as her mother left leaving her in complete silence. She pulled out her journal writing on the thin pages. There was no one to talk to but her notebook.

Dear Diary,

Some boy named Cench walked me home today. And he saved me from total embarrassment too. That's way too much for one day.

I'm not gonna call him Cench and I'm gonna find out his real name. He's mysterious but so am I. And I need all the friends I can get.

Mom's drinking again. I can tell. She was slumped when I got home and now she's 'working'. What was the point of us coming to the UK if she was gonna do the same shit?

The first chance I get I'm heading back to the US and living with my dad. Well, that's if I find him first.

The girls at school are mean to me. I'm gonna try to make friends but I could barely get through the day. I'm still learning and it's hard.

Authors Note:

I'm so excited for this story, like y'all ain't ready

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