Reviewed by: ChristineAcedon 

Book Title: Illegally His!?

Author's Name: thedelusionalwriterr 

Cover: 10/10

I really like the simplistic layout of your cover. The cover is easy to read and the background catches the eye.

Title: 10/10

The title you've chosen works well considering the audience for the story. It makes it fairly clear the type of story they are about to dive into and helps to set the tone.

Blurb/Description: 10/10

I think it was a great idea to include a short excerpt of the story in your story description, and the fact that you still include a brief description of the story as well is great. Just like the title, this helps to ensure that the right readers/audience see this story.

Creativity and originality: 10/10

Your story reminds me of that movie on Netflix 365 Days, but you've definitely put your spin on it. I'm interested to see where you take it.

Plot and Flow: 17/20

There are parts in the story where I would like to see a little more. It feels as though you're fast forwarding to the 'good' bits of the story and I think seeing a little more of the in between could go a long way toward establishing a connection between readers and the characters. For example, in the first chapter, I would like to see more of the scene from two years prior before jumping to the present.

Character Development: 18/20

I find it difficult to believe that Meera would immediately let her temper get the better of her so quickly after finding herself in unfamiliar territory. The fact that she not only lets her temper loose, and shows no fear, but has no fear is very surprising to me. With the story being told in first person, you have the advantage of being able to have her show 'no fear' to her enemies while also narrating her fear to the readers.

Regarding Xavier as well as Lucian, the fact that they are in the mafia comes through loud and clear. Xavier's obsession with Meera also comes through clearly, but I would like to see more of his personality outside of those two things.

Writing style: 9/10

Just to clarify because I am a bit confused, when he is speaking to his men both times after she's walked away in the first chapter, can she hear him? If she can, I would definitely imagine alarm bells going off in her head, but if she can't then I don't they should be included due to the fact that it's being told in first person and we shouldn't know more than the person narrating, if that makes sense?

Overall, I like your style of writing, and I think Meera has a strong voice for her story.

Grammar, spellings, etc.: 8/10

I noticed a few grammatical and spelling errors here and there throughout the story. I think some basic proof-reading can take care of that once you've got the time to go through it.

Overall: 92/100

I want to thank you for giving me the opportunity to check out your work. You do an amazing job at painting a picture with your words and setting the scene. I think that the suggestions I've made would help to strengthen your story, but of course you're the best person to decide the right course for your story.

Happy writing!