❄ Happy Journey | Brit ❄
Reviewed by: ChristineAcedon
Title: Happy Journey!
Author's name: Uditasree
Cover: 10/10
I love this cover! The suitcases with the globe on top is the perfect image, and all of the colors go really well together. One of my favorite covers of all time, to be honest.
Title: 10/10
This is a cute, short, and to the point title. It goes along well with the plot of this story.
Blurb/Description: 8/10
The blurb does a good job at drawing interest and I like the little expert you offer at the top. You introduce the characters and set the scene. It does get a little confusing with all of the names within the description. I understand the connection that Rukmini and Vikrant are best friends and we can see who Mahi is, but Krish is just thrown in for a single sentence and it's a bit confusing. Of course, reading the story, it begins to straighten out.
Creativity and originality: 10/10
I enjoy the premise of this story and the chaos of the four main characters. The siblings and the best friends...it's a fun combination. I love the character pictures that you offer in the beginning, giving us all someone to imagine as we're going through the story.
I also think that the loyalty and care Krish feels for his sister is meaningful and I thoroughly enjoy stories that involve sibling relationships.
Plot and Flow: 17/20
The first few chapters seem to speed through everything kind of quickly. I understand the majority of this story is meant to revolve around the 'journey' however I would encourage you to expand further from the start; how Mahi is feeling about everything, expanding into Krish's plans to take his sister on the trip, etc. Slowing it down and setting things up for the future may not sound as fun as getting to the 'meat' of the story, but it can help to establish character development for the reader as well.
Rukmini and Vikrant's trip also happens very suddenly without much of an explanation beyond who bought the tickets and why not everyone knew the trip was happening. I would've liked to see the conversation that was had to finally inform them of the trip.
Character Development: 19/20
You do a good job of showing the thoughts of your main characters. There doesn't really seem to be much development between the main characters and secondary characters, like the families. They show up for very brief moments, but it's almost like an afterthought. I would really like to see more interaction between all four main characters and their parents/family members. I think it would add to their development.
Writing style: 9/10
I am someone who relies more heavily on dialogue than setting, so I can understand and appreciate when a story focuses more on conversation between characters. It makes it easier to get a feel for a character's outer persona as we see how they address the world, and, in my opinion, it keeps the story interesting and moving along.
With that said, I also feel that dialogue-heavy stories almost always struggle with pacing and I feel that this is the case with 'Happy Journey!'. I love the voice that you give your characters and the motivation behind their actions. I would like to see a bit more description when it comes to setting as well as more fully fleshed out thoughts and feelings of the characters. It seems that there is an almost constant need to jump from one topic or point to the next without much time to soak it in.
Grammar, spellings, etc.: 8/10
I noticed a few things here and there that could do with a read-through. For example in the prologue, first paragraph, "Never in my right mind I would do this again" I'd switch around 'would' and 'I'. Another example is in the fourth chapter, "I stood up to walk towards the door when Krish settled in front of me, stopping me." Was he appearing in front of her, or was he settling down in the seat across from her? I was just a little confused by the wording.
Overall: 91/100
This story strikes me as one that is going to be a hot chaotic mess (in a good way) and I'm here for it. As I've mentioned, there are certain scenes and points that I would enjoy seeing expanded on/slowed down, but overall, I really enjoy it. I think that if you expand on earlier scenes that could also really help the readers connect more solidly with the characters as well. I also recommend just reading through it another time, when you've got time to spare, to just ensure that you've fixed any clarity issues. Possibly reading it out loud so you can physically hear how it sounds.
I look forward to reading more!
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