Reviewed by: ChristineAcedon

Title: Chandravati

Author's name: Uditasree

Cover: 8/10

Your cover is very simplistic and pretty, however, given everything going on within the story, I don't think it fits. This may simply be because it's a short and rushed story and you weren't able to draw out major parts you may have wanted to (I understand you were under a word count constraint). The moon is an important focal point, I believe, for you. You should definitely keep some piece of the moon within your cover, but maybe do away with the leaves and find a more bold and eye-catching font for the title.

Title: 10/10

I think this is a cute title that ties into a piece of the story, a major piece of the underlying plot. It doesn't give anything away, it fits within the plot and it's simple.

Blurb/Description: 5/10

Without giving away something that may be considered a spoiler, I will say that your blurb gives away everything without giving away anything. I can see that you're trying to draw readers in by keeping it mysterious while also putting a spotlight on the romance, but this story doesn't feel like a romance. Love may be there, but it plays second fiddle to the mystery that's going on throughout the story.

Because the story itself is jumbled, rushed and all over the place, I think it will continue to be difficult to create an effective blurb/description. If and once you make adjustments to the story itself, I think you'll find that the description will be easier to create.

Creativity and originality: 10/10

You have an abundant amount of creativity and originality. It flows through you and that is so amazing. The ideas you have running through your head seem to be never-ending. From what I understood of this story, you didn't disappoint with another wonderful idea. All the twists and turns, the references to their past...you've put your own spin on it.

Plot and Flow: 10/20

I have to be a bit more harsh here. As I've mentioned; I love the plot and the creativity that went into it and I believe that I can see where you were going with it/what you were hoping to accomplish. Unfortunately, as you acknowledge in the author's notes yourself, you rushed this. You were focused on the word count restrictions and, in my opinion, too focused on meeting those guidelines causing your story to suffer for it.

I had a very hard time following what was happening most of the time. I wanted more history between Ruchi and Advay and more backstory regarding her sister and his best friend. They're mentioned and then they're written off very quickly. Harit's entire plotline is filled with holes. You made the effort to wrap it all up in the end; ensuring that we, as the readers, were given a conclusion, but it was missing so much.

Character Development: 10/20

I touched on this in the plot/flow section,n so I won't go into it too much here, but I would've really enjoyed having the opportunity to know more about the characters; especially the main characters. More than what is needed strictly to move the story along. Who are they? What do they enjoy? Who are their friends? Who are their families? What is their history together?

This, again, can be improved upon if you slow down. Don't make your characters sprint to the finish line; let them walk a little.

Writing style: 9/10

I have the same opinion here as I did with the previous review for Shaadi; I love your voice and I love your creativity. I would recommend working on slowing it down.

Grammar, spelling, etc.: 9/10

The grammar and spelling in this seemed better than Shaadi (not that that one had many issues either). There were a few times where working got a bit confusing, but overall, you did well here.

Genre relevance: 10/10

Another short story, as you described, maybe with a bit of mystery/crime and romance?

Overall: 71/100

Contests (as I believe that was what you were taking part of for this, but I'm not sure) are fun and they can offer writers a fun opportunity to try something they wouldn't normally, or inject them with fun new ideas. That's great and I encourage to keep participating in them if you enjoy them, but don't let your work suffer just so that they can fit into those restraints.

I enjoyed the concept of your story, but the execution of it was rushed, jumbled and lacking. I truly hope you keep this story in the back of your mind to work on again when you're feeling inspired. I can't wait to see what you do with it.

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