NIEL POV

Love and pain comes together when you fall in love to someone. Funny is, you will never fell them both from time to time. Love come first and pain comes after.

I played the petals of the rose with my hand. This flower is pretty. It comes with many color. Too beautiful, but dangerous. It will you fall in love first, then, it will hurt you with its own thorns.

Just like Max. He let me fall for him. He let me believe all those sugar coated words. Then, he hurt me. He slap me with the truth that the marriage we have, the title I have now is for the sake of the kids. He stab me with the fact that he didn't love me and he will never be.

Who will love a weird guy like me? Who will love a man who can bear a child inside him and be a mother just like other woman.

No one. No one will love me.

Is there can be funnier than this? Why me? I'm a man. Why gave me a womb that is for a woman? Do I did a horrible mistake in my past life for me to suffer like this?

Why I was born in this city? In this kingdom? Why not give me a life that might be hard but normal?

I fell my body weaken. I can't feel my feet nor my legs anymore. I can feel my body is falling. I just smile. F*cked the life I have. If it is not for my kids, I will wish to die in an instant.

I frowned. The room is full of books. I can sense a familiar feeling even though this is the first time I saw this place.

But, where am I? I start walking and scan the room. The place is huge. There are at least six book shelves on the right side, a huge table on the left side. A grand piano on beside the huge table.

The place is well cleaned. I tried to touch the piano but my hand pass through it. I gasp, then I remember something. I collapsed a while ago. I just suddenly eaten by darkness. Am I on  my dream?

Whatever. I need an escape from the painful reality anyway. Wherever I am right now, I don't care.

I continue roaming. I really can sense familiarity in this place. Like I was been there. Like, this place was part of me.

I stop my step in front of the piano. I looked intently on the picture frame on the top. A picture of two girls with the same age. They are both smiling while holding an indentical dolls. They look like a twin.

"Gail, where have you been? I've been looking for you for so long."

The door opened and two young girls entered. They are the girls in the picture.

"Just somewhere." The girl with long straing blonde hair answer. Gail as the other girl called her.

"You snicked again in the hall?"  The other girl asked.

"Meisha Kristelle, it's just a peak."

"Ashira Gail if father caught you, you'll be grounded for sure."

"He will not do that. She love the two of us. Beside how old are we? 6? We're just six for that kind of punishment. Only our brothers deserve that kind of punishment."

"Whatever. So, have you seen the crown prince?" Meisha asked.

"See, you are also interested."

"Of course I am. One of us will be a his crown princess."

Gail sit on the floor while pouting.

"I don't want to be a crown princess." Gail said.

"But what if the crown prince choose you?" Meisha asked as she also sit on the floor.

"Then, I'll escape."

"As if you can. Once the crown prince choose one of us, there will be more guard in the house."

"Then I'll asked dad to let you be the crown princess."

"Are dumb? You know that I don't like to be one. You know who I like."

"The Duke?"

"Yuck. It's the marquis."

"Whatever Meisha, I don't want to be a crown princess."

"Why? You never mention anything about that before. Is the crown prince ugly?"

"No. I just don't like him to have many girls around him."

"Ahhh. So in short you are getting jealous. Hahahahha."

"Shut up Meisha."

"Fine. I shut my mouth Gail."

They both fell in silence. Funny to think that on their age they know what they want and not. They are so matured at their age.

"Gail. If someday you become a crown princess, I promise that whatever happened, I'll be the one to protect what is yours." Meisha said out of the blue.

"You should also protect what is yours."

"I can do both Gail. I can protect our happiness simultaneously."

"I'll do the same." Gail answer.

I smile. I can feel something in my heart. Like a hand touch it. It ease away all the pain and hatred I have.

Then, suddenly, the place switch into somewhere. In a burning house. People are shouting, people are crying. Some are running with a basin and bucket on their hands. They are trying to put out the fire.

I step back. I was horrified. I got scared. I continue to retreat until.... I heard someone calling my name.

"Niel, Niel."

Slowly, I open my eyes. I squinted with the strong light that greeted me.

"Niel, wake up."

I focus on the blurred face in front of me. It's Max.

"King." I said in a very low voice.

"Finally your awake." Then he turned to somewhere. "Call the doctor Megan. No. Asked someone to call the doctor."

Megan? They are both here. How sweet. They are both taking good care of me.

I tried to sit up but I suddenly feel dizzy.

"Stay Niel." Max command.

"I go to mother and tell her that the queen is awake." I heard Megan said.

"Go, but be careful." Max said.

I let out a deep sigh and look somewhere. I shouldn't woke up first.

But anyway, that's a weird dream. What does it mean?

"Hey, are you okay?" Max hold my hand and gently squeezed it.

"I'm fine. I'm sorry for making you worried. You can go now. The doctor will be here soon." I said coldy without looking at him.

"Are you mad at me Niel?"

I laugh, then I look at him.

"Is there a reason for me to get mad at you? My bad. It' a wrong question. Let me rephrase it. Do i have the right to get mad at you? Your Majesty?"

"Niel."

"Max, I'm fine. You can go. Follow Megan. She' pregnant. I'll asked someone later to tell you what is the doctor said. You have lot of things to do than being with me."

"Fine. Take care of yourself." Then he stand up and turn his back to me.

"All I want is honesty Max. Even if I'm a weird person, I still deserve an honesty. If you can't give it to me, then don't expect for us to have a good relationship nor me be good to you."

"I understand."

After 5 minutes the doctor arrived followed by my mother in-law. The doctor checked me and said that I'm fine already. I'm just still weak and need more time to rest.

My mother in-law order all the maids I have with the things they need to do. She even refrain me from doing something that can make me tires and said that I should stay in the bed for a week. I just said yes. As if I can say no. I am in the palace, not in our home.

When they all left, I step down my bed and walk in to the window. I look at the sky and let the tears escape from my eyes.

I shouldn't expect. When I said to Max that all I want is his honesty, the way he answered me tells me that all the truth is already in front of me.

Megan, her being pregnant. Not to mention that she is a royal consort. My position is nothing but a support to Ryu's title. I am nothing in this palace most especially to Max.

My head suddenly ache. I flinch. I felt dizzy. Slowly I made my way to my bed. Images flashed in my head. A two young girls. The girl in my dream.

"Why? Who exactly are you?"

MAX POV

"How is she?" I asked Sharon, Niel's maid.

"She's fine though she's hard headed. The moment the queen dowager left, she left her bed and walk around her room."

"Then?"

"I really don't know what exactly happened. She just went back in her bed while massaging her temple. When I enter her room, she is sleeping already."

"Okay. Don't take away your eyes to her. Make sure that she is always safe. If you need to report anything to me, just ask your buddy."

"Yes Your Majesty."

"Until when you will Niel in the dark?" Megan asked when Sharon step out of the room.

"Till everything is safe for him."

"Even if your relationship is at risk?"

"If it will make him safe, it doesn' matter."

Megan rolled her eyes. "You're stupid. You can see that Niel is in pain. He already asked for your honesty. You already know that you are in pain also. And hello, I got involved. Well, I really don't care. I already made a promise way back. But, Max, he is hurting. I think if you will tell him the truth or atleast the truth that the child I'm carrying is not yours it will lessen his pain."

"What if your father know that the child is not mine?"

"Don't you trust him?"

"I do. I do trust him."

"Then you are worrying for  nothing. Max, for the sake of the kids, please do enlightened Niel. For my sake also, please tell him. I told you I need his guidance. So please. Besides sooner or later, another truth will reveal."

I didn't answer. Should I? I don't want him to suffer again. He suffered enough. If I tell him everything, he will suffer more.

"Think about it Max. I'm telling you. If Niel make a wrong decision because of what you are doing right now, don't come to me crying."

I just nod my head.

Niel. Ever since you're so naughty. You gave your father a headache. You're a jolly person. You always smile, you always laugh. After that incident, you lost your smile, your real identity.

But secrets can't keep in the dark forever. I know it. How I wish you will not remember everything.

"Your Majesty, Mr. Battalier is here." One of my eunuch announce from the outside.

"Let him in."

The door open and a police officer came in. I smile at him. Sometimes I wonder why good people always has a dark past. Like him and my Niel.

"Your Majesty." He simply bow.

"Any news about the case?" I asked directly. I point the vacant chair in front of me.

"As you said, the drug is already in the black market. A lot of people buying it and sell it outside. People believe that it the best medicine so far. I asked Shin Wei to examine it. And it is the same drug that the queen got. Also my collegue said that the drug has a fatal effect. Once the taker got overdose it will kill him or her right away."

"How about the other case?"

"It's the same person Your Majesty. Also, one of the princess is his real daughter."

I nod. As expected.

"Thank you for that information. Please continue the investagation. Update me with everything."

"Yes Your Majesty. Also before I forgot,  the hyena seems know that you are hiding the leopard."

"Let him. It will rattle him. But keep an eye to him."

"Okay. I'll go now."

"Take care. Give my regards ni Szenix."

"I will."

I asked the head eunuch to escort him outside.

"The hyena know that I am hiding a leopard huh?" I murmured. "Better. Let see what step you will make."