Yesol was sleeping peacefully. Y/n stared at him, she closed her eyes and started crying. She put her above her mouth trying to stop herself from making any noises. She doesn't want to wake him up.

She cupped his face, at least she has him. She only has him, and she loves him more than anyone. She kissed his forehead.

He opened his eyes. He got excited to see Y/n. "Eomma!"

Y/n quickly wiped her tears. "Sorry, did I wake you up?"

"No, it's fine. Eomma! I was thinking about you before I went to sleep! And see you come!" He said.

"You were thinking about me?" She asked. He nodded his head.

"Yes! I w-" He stopped when he noticed that she was crying. "Eomma, are you sad?"

"No."

He pouted. "You're lying, that is not right."

Y/n chuckled, and wiped her tears again. "So, your Eomma cries a lot."

"Why? You don't look pretty while crying." He wiped her tears with his tiny hands. No matter how many times he wipes her tears, more and more tears scroll down.

"I don't look pretty?" She only gets called pretty by Namjoon when she is called.

"Yes, only when you're crying. I want you to be happy and smiling all the time." He said. Y/n hugged him. He cares about her so much, even when she pushed him away since his childhood.

She should not be crying like this infront of him, but she can't help. She hugged him tightly while crying.

Namjoon is right, it would be unfair to Yesol if Y/n had another child. Yesol deserves her love, if he sees her loving another child and not him, he will start hating Y/n.

She laid beside him, she chuckled as Yesol was patting the back of her head. Yesol is really kind and smart. Y/n don't think she would have been able to raise him like he has been raised. "You are a better person than me. I am proud of you."

"I am proud of you too, Eomma." He said. Y/n smiled, she kissed his forehead.

She was wrong, he is the best thing that ever happened to her life.

Yesol kept patting her head. She couldn't stop crying until she fell asleep. Yesol smiled and hugged, he closed his eyes and fell asleep too, he was really happy that Y/n was here. That means she cares about him.

It was so peaceful. She remembers the only good sleep she had in years was in Taehyung's house, and now is the second time.

She suddenly woke up as someone pulled her arm. She looked at him and it was Namjoon. "What happened?" Y/n whispered yell, not wanting to wake up Yesol. But he woke up already.

Namjoon looked really angry. She has never never seen him being this angry. He hurts Y/n even when he is happy, so she is not sure what he will do to her when he looks pissed off.

Namjoon pulled her but Yesol stood up and held Y/n's dress. "Eomma,"

"Go to sleep, it's fine." Y/n said.

Namjoon dragged Y/n down, causing Yesol to fall on the floor. Namjoon completely ignored Yesol and took Y/n to his room.

Did he catch her? Why is so pissed? "What the fck were you doing in Yesol's room?"

"He is my son-" He pushed her to the wall. She groaned. Her body was already feeling weak after what happened earlier.

"Fck shut up, you never fcking care about being a mother, or him being your son. Now suddenly when he is growing up you remember you have a son?" He yelled.

He is always really calm, even when he is doing the most insane things to her.

"Yes because I have realized," He interrupted her again.

"You fcking realized that you can take my anger out on him?"

"Why would I hurt him? When I can hurt others." She has other people who she can hurt .

"Because he is my child? So you must feel good by torturing him? But that Fcking disgusting." He hold her neck, "Your neck, you told Yesol to give you those?"

"What are you saying? Are you insane? Of course it's not Yesol! Why would I? How could you even think that way?!" She exclaimed.

"It's not Yesol, then who. I want his name right now." He said.

"Stop right now please," She hugged Namjoon and started crying. "Please not right now."

She was emotional and physical drained. He pushed her again. "I had enough of you,"

Same

She is feeling the same.

She had enough of him and everyone.

"You claim that you love me and then sleep with someone else."

"I do love you. Just tell me what the fck you want from me!? I am trying to behave like you want! I can't understand you!" She exclaimed.

"Good, you love me. I love you too. It's your time to proof that you want me." He took his dagger out and started ripping her dress. "Only fcking me, only fcking I can touch you!"

"What are you doing!" She yelled.

"Making you ugly, so no man would even look at you. Only I can." He said.

It almost felt like she is numb to pain because she didn't make any noise when he was digging the dagger in her skin. He never cut her skin or leave an permeant mark. But now he was leaving it.
__

She hugged her legs, trying to hide her body. "Y/n,"

"Go away!" Y/n pushed Jin's hand." Don't look at me, I don't want anyone to look at me."

When she thinks she is completely broke, Namjoon proves her wrong by breaking her more.

He cupped her face and wiped her tears. "It's fine, it's just me."

She closed her eyes, and slowly removed her arms that were covering her body. She doesn't want to look at Jin, he will hate her after this. He must be feeling disgusted by looking at the cut that starts from her left shoulder and end at her right ribs.

She opened her eyes. And saw him staring at her. "Stop it. I know it's ugly! It will leave a scar! My body will not remain the same."

"No, it's not ugly. Nothing can make you ugly, Y/n." He kissed her lips. She closed her eyes while crying. He break the kiss. He hold her hand and give her a warm smile. "You are beautiful, and I love you."

She can see that, in his eyes. It was still bleeding. "I need to stop it from bleeding, you already lost so much blood it's not good for the baby."

She looked down. "There is no baby. Nothing. When I think I have control in my life. Things gets fcked up." More tears scroll down her face.

He cupped her face, "I am sorry."

It hurts him, because he feel like he is not doing anything, he saw her since she was young, getting torture. He is one of few people who has seen her in worse situation.

Yet he does not. He loves her, but can't do anything to stop him from hurting her.

He needs to treat her wound first, it was deep, "I will try my best that it doesn't leave a scar."
__

Y/n played with Soju's fur. Yuri give Y/n an envelope, a rose and small box.

"What?" Y/n looked at him.

"Prince Jungkook left this for you." She told her.

"He did? Why are you giving it to me? Why you didn't give it to me when he left?" Y/n asked, and rose it was fresh.

"He told me to give it to you when you are hurt, and he requested to give you are fresh rose with it."  She told her. Y/n nodded her head. Yuri bowed and left.

Y/n opened the letter,

"Dear Y/n, It's sad that I am not there to comfort you. But I hope this letter would help. I still remember when I first saw you, it was standing really far from you, but I could still see how you were admiring the world. It was spring, I could see from look at your face that you wanted to stay outside and admire the nature. Like I wanted you to stay infront of me so I would admire you.

I am not sure if 6 year old can fall in love. But I swear it felt like love. I was sad, because you didn't get admired the spring Like you wanted and was sent to your room.

After that, I kept waiting just to get one glance of you. It was impossible to even step close to you. I admire you from a far and I promised myself that I will make sure you get admire every spring, every season, every day of your life with me and I get to admire you.

You always looked at the world in a really different way. You paid attention to parts of nature we see everyday but never pay any attention. I admire you for you that. I admire you for everything.

My love for you always stay same. I am not with you, but I am sure where were I would be, I must be thinking about you. You are my whole existence.

I don't want to leave, but I am because you want. I don't want to force you for anything. But never doubt me or my love for you Y/n. It's you or no one.

And the necklace, please wear it, next time when we meet I want to see you wearing it.

I love you."

Y/n stared at the letter and hold it tight, tears scroll down her face. She has been locked in her room for days now.

She is not allowed to go out and a chain is attached to her ankle, so even if she wants to sneak out of the room she can't.

But Jin is allowed in her room. He is allowed so he can change her bandage.

She quickly hide the letter when someone entered the room. It was Jin, "You are crying again."

He wiped her tears. "I am not crying." She mumbled.

Jin always come and talk to her. He makes her laugh, she is grateful for Jin being here with him. He took off her bandage, Y/n stared at the scar. "It's not healing."

"It will Y/n. Give it some time." Jin said.

"I will never." Jungkook admire her, will he admire me with this scar?

"Even if it's not, you don't need to worry."

"You still love me even after this scar? Even when my body look like this now?" Y/n asked.

"Of course, when you fall in love it's not for their bodies."

"It's for who they are? I am ugly, inside and now outside too." Scars are huge thing, asian women, specially the one from royals must have flawless body with no scars or imperfection.

"You are not, Y/n." Jin kissed her scar. "This world is ugly, and you are just trying to survive."

She looked at Jin. No matter how much pain she is in, Jin always makes her feel better, he relieves all her pain and makes her feel love. This is exactly what she wants.

Chasing after them all will only hurt her in the end.

Taehyung would just hurt her more and Jungkook despite his promises and confession of love, Y/n feel like she doesn't know him.

But Jin, she doesn't doubt his love or him.

It's better if she chooses Just one and she has decided she will choose Jin.
___

Y/n hold the necklace in her hand. Staring at the green stone, she focused and realized it was bunny shaped.

She sat up and hugged Gaenip, she loves her pets more, she saw them grow up and they have been with her since her teenage. So they are really precious to her. Jin and her pets have never hurt her feelings, so she loves them the most.

She does love Yesol, it's natural for her to love him, even when she tried to hate him she couldn't really hate him.

Namjoon doesn't allow her to even meet Yesol. She doesn't know why he is doing that. And he didn't come to see her either.

At least Jin is allowed. He cheers her up and makes her feel happy and loved.

She heard a noise, she sat up and saw Yesol who was on the floor crawling. He quickly hid behind the door.

The guards entered her room. "Your highness, what was that noise? Did anyone enter?"

"How can you enter my room without knocking?" Y/n said. They bowed.

"We got orders to make sure no one enters the room."

"Can you see anyone? No one did. So leave." Y/n said. They apologized and left.

Yesol takes out his head, and breathes. "Thank god they left!"

"What are you doing here?" Y/n asked. Yesol stood up and brushed the invisible dust off his clothes.

"I am here to see you Eomma!" He said. He looked at the chain at her feet. The animals are roaming around freely while a human is chained.

"You will get in trouble." Y/n said. He did, in past days he kept trying to enter and would get caught all the time. But thankfully this time he was able to come inside his room.

"I would, I would get in huge trouble! But I am so happy to see you! And I hope you are happy to see him!" He said.

She is really happy, she finds that really adorable.

Yesol ran near Y/n as Soju tried to come near him. They are bigger than Yesol. "Don't be afraid, they are nicer than humans."

"They are scary." Yesol said.

"No, come here." She holds his little face and makes him pat Gaenip's head. He yawned and Yesol got scared again.

"His teeth are scary!" He hugged Y/n tightly. "My teacher is scarier, can you ask him to eat him? He tells me to study all the time. I am tired of reading boring text."

Y/n laughed, "You are so adorable! I want to eat your cheeks." She kissed his cheek.

Yesol smiled brightly. "You are adorable too."

"You always return the compliments."

"Only yours." He looked at the chain again, it must be uncomfortable. "Why eomma is chained?"

"First answer me, Why do you think humans chain animals?" She questions.

He thinks for a few minutes. "I don't know."

"When animals are too wild,To have control over them. Humans like power, they like to have control. So chaining gives them a sense of power and control." She replied.

Yesol is a smart kid. He understood her reference. "Appa wants control over him."

"Yes, that doesn't make me honey. He has control over the whole kingdom, but he feels the need to chain me to have control over him. Which makes me stronger than the whole kingdom." She said,

Yesol was feeling pity for her but after hearing her answer he was impressed. "You are the coolest."

"What makes you like me so much?" She asked.

"Everything Eomma!"

It was time to change her bandaid and Jin to come. Yesol was about to hide but Y/n stopped him. "It's fine honey, don't be afraid of him."

Jin stared at Yesol, "What are you doing here?"

"I just came to see mother." He pouted.

"Jin, can you help him out without anyone noticing?" Y/n asked.

"Of course." He replied. Y/n told him to first make sure Yesol reached out safely.

He returned back. "It's good to see you get along with him well."

Y/n smiled, "It's impossible to hate him."

He was trying to treat his wound but Y/n hugged him instead. "Your highness, let me work."

"No, you need to kiss me first." Y/n said.

He held her face and quickly pecked her lips, he couldn't stay for longer. Namjoon is being strict, so Jin must do his work and leave.

"Stitches needs to be removed today."

She pulled him in and kissed him deeply. She loves his lips. It's addicting.

She never felt this happy and relieved before.
_