$ s i x t y t h r e e $

The sun was rising over the city of Seoul and at the casino, the members of the Coven and the Pack were getting a good night's rest. In one of the top floor's high class suites, someone stirred in his bed, riddled with nightmares. The pack's beta awoke from his sleep at dawn with a start and breathing heavily. He was drenched in a cold sweat from the nightmare he had that felt like a reality. In his dream he had gone straight to Miran's house and killed her parents without mercy. He had overlooked Miran's feelings and did what his anger told him to do. Miran had been horrified by his actions despite the fact that her parents were horrible to her. 

His sudden movement had been enough to shake Miran from her sleep as well. His arms had been wrapped around her slim body from behind, spooning her comfortably while they slept. "Light...What happened?" She called groggily, still ridden with sleep.

He was quiet for a moment, stewing in his thoughts and debating whether he should talk to her about it or not. It was just a dream after all--a horrible dream that he had been fortunate to wake up from. But it was close to becoming a reality. Just the night before he had strongly considered marching over to her parents house that morning. Everything that happened in that dream was what he had intended to do.

Perhaps that dream was a sign that he should refrain from doing the unthinkable because Miran would hate him for it. She would think him a monster.

When he finally said something, he heaved a sigh and cuddled closer to her, tightening his arms around her body for comfort. It was only the second, going into the third month of her pregnancy, and he could already just barely feel a little bump beneath her shirt whenever he held her as they slept at night. It filled him with a happiness unimaginable and melted away all the problems he'd been having recently--most of them because of Minha. 

"Everything's fine, baby. I just had a bad dream." He then admitted to her with a bit of hesitance, "I dreamt that I did something horrible, and that you wouldn't forgive me for it." 

She tried turning in his arms and he loosened his hold on her just enough for her to face him. On her face was a pout that he wished he could instantly erase. She cared for him so deeply, and he loved her so much too. He couldn't think of himself without Miran anymore. She was his other half and the only person other than his brothers who made him truly happy.

He would do anything for her.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She asked, worried by what he had told her, looking up into his dark eyes.

He bit his lip as he thought about it. Would she judge him if he told her? No, he thought to himself, Miran wasn't like that. Other times he had talked to her about his worries and the darkness that he felt in his heart when Junmyeon chose Kyungsoo to be their next leader. He told her how he wanted to challenge him and rip him apart. She didn't judge him, she only listened. But this was different. These were her parents. She wouldn't take it so calmly.

"I dreamt that I went to your house, and murdered your parents."

Just like in the dream, she tensed in his arms, turning frozen in surprise. 

-

He walked her back to her car and was surprised to find Iva there. Mariel explained with embarrassment that she and Iva were spying on him and the Russian beauty was the only one that knew about his strange behavior. Iva tried to salvage it by admitting that she had been the one to put those thoughts in Mariel's head, but Mariel wouldn't let her take the blame alone. They were sisters now and she wanted to protect her.

With Iva now present, Mariel and Jongdae let her take the car back to the hotel. Mariel would instead return to the mansion with Jongdae. As they entered the front gates, she saw flashes in her mind, almost like war flashbacks of Jongdae's cold seemingly dead body tied to the front porch of the house. The stench of sticky crimson blood filled her nose along with the horrible memories. It was so vivid because she remembered just how much she had suffered when she saw him like that. 

She shook her head quickly, to shake the thoughts away. But it was nearly impossible as they entered the house. She tried not to look at the places where she had seen him dead. The dining room, and a trail of blood that led out the front door when he was dragged outside. 

Mariel closed her eyes tight and tried to walk past the entrance of the house quickly. Jongdae held her hand the entire way. "It still gives you nightmares, aegiya?" He asked her, though the answer was already obvious. She didn't even want to open her eyes out of fear of the mental images that would cloud her brain. But even with her eyes closed she could see it all. It had been one of the most traumatizing experiences of her life.

She confirmed with a nod of her head and he added, "This is where Ruo Lan died too." He gave a shaky exhalation of breath. When he closed his eyes, it was all he saw too. And he saw it in his nightmares even. "I never told anyone, but it was my fault. I could have prevented it. But she was suffocating me. She followed me around, and called me every second of the day to know what I was doing." He said, pausing for a moment when the memory became too vivid and painful. "That morning she called me while I was at work, and I thought it was another one of her paranoid threat calls. Who are you with? What are you doing? Remember that I love you Dae, and if you leave me I'll kill myself. I swear I will. I was done with it so I ignored her call. Fifteen minutes later Hyuna called, hysterically screaming that Lani was...dead." He swallowed hard.

Jongdae still felt the heaviness of guilt. It was a huge weight on his shoulders. He would never forgive himself for ignoring her that day.

He led her into the next room, the living room, where both of them could finally breathe easy in a house where there had been many bloodshed. They sat on the couch and Mariel laid her head on his shoulder. "It wasn't your fault that it happened that way. I know you cared about her and the last thing you wanted was for her to die."

"But that was my flaw." He insisted with a sad sigh. "I didn't love her enough."

"Lets talk about something else." She pleaded, placing a peck on his lips.

There was a silence of a few minutes between them before he remembered he had good news for her. From his jacket pocket he pulled out an envelope with a set of plane tickets inside. "We're going to adopt one child here, then we're going back to Korea and adopt a child there. Light already agreed to watch them for us so that we can go to your countries--Mexico and the Philippines--to adopt two more kids. When they grow up, we can go adopt more children. Its up to you, but I've always wanted to have twelve kids." He grinned at the idea.

"If that will make you happy, I'm on board." She grinned back at him. "I love you so much, Jongdae."

"I love you more, baby." He kissed her on the lips.

-

so i just messed with your emotions everyone. baekhyun didn't actually kill his suegros. it was just a dream. but i think i still want him to go in there and take miran's sisters away from them. sooner or later, they'd probably just give her away to another gang.

like they did with miran. and then there's jongdae with a bit more detail into ruo lan's death. the actual telling of that story will take place in "lucky" when i eventually update it.

thank you all loads for reading. it means a lot to me.

-clary