I don't own anything.
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Galen Erso: GUYS OMG OMG OMG HELP ME

Lyra Erso: What's wrong, Galen?

Galen Erso: ORSONJUSTFELLDOWNTHESTAIRSANDNOWHESUNCONSCIOUS

Lyra Erso: I have no idea what you just said.

K-2SO: He said "Orson just fell down the stairs and now he's unconscious"

Lyra Erso: 😧

Galen Erso: WHAT DO I DO

Wilhuff Tarkin: What do you think? BRING HIM TO THE MEDICAL BAY

Galen Erso: WERE IN MY HOUSE I AM NOWHERE NEAR A MEDICAL BAY

K-2SO: Do you know basic first aid?

Galen Erso: NOT REALLY

Thawn: Omg what do we do

Governor Pryce: SOMEONE GO HELP GALEN

Lyra Erso: Galen, I'm on my way home from the grocery store. I'll be right there to help him.

Jyn Erso: Mama u forgot me at the grocery store again

Thawn: Terrible timing Mini Erso

K-2SO: Go shop for fifteen hundred hours

Governor Pryce: NO ONE CARES

Lyra Erso: Get a ride from the hot pilot dude, Jyn. THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!

Wilhuff Tarkin: INDEED

Jyn Erso: MINI ERSO?!??

Thawn: Well you are the shortest one out of you three

Wilhuff Tarkin: Thrawn! Focus on the issue!

Galen Erso: OMG OMG NOW HES BLEEDING

Jyn Erso: Is he dead yet?

K-2SO: ^^

Galen Erso: ...

Galen Erso: He's still breathing

Jyn Erso: Did you check his pulse?

Wilhuff Tarkin: Yeah see what his pulse is in 15 seconds

Galen Erso: Irregular

Thawn: NONONO

Governor Pryce: OH FORCE

Chirrut Îmwe: DO NOT USE THE FORCE'S NAME IN VAIN EVEN WHEN YOUR FRIEND IS DYING

K-2SO: DO NOT LISTEN TO CHIRRUT AND USE THE FORCES NAME ALL YOU WANT

Cassian Andor: What is going on?

Jyn Erso: Mama left me at the grocery store

K-2SO: Hopefully she left her credit card with you too

Galen Erso: ORSON FELL DOWN THE STAIRS AND NOW HES BLEEDING AND HIS PULSE IS IRREGULAR

Cassian Andor: OMG

Cassian Andor: IM COMING TO HELP

Jyn Erso: CASSIAN!!!

Cassian Andor: I will get you after Jyn where ru Galen

Galen Erso: I'm at my home

Lyra Erso: Galen, I'm three minutes away.

Cassian Andor: I'm six minutes from ur home

Galen Erso: Plz hurry I don't know what to do

K-2SO: Let him die

Jyn Erso: Well do something Papa

Governor Pryce: Oh man... someone! Does anyone know first aid!? Can someone tell Galen what to do

Lyra Erso: I know some basic but that's it.

Thawn: Same

Galen Erso: WELL TELL ME

Thawn: Assess the situation to make sure he's safe, keep him in a safe area, true to stop the bleeding, that's basically it

Galen Erso: Wow -_-

Saw Gererra: STOP BLOWING UP MY PHONE

Eren Jaëger: STOP MAKING MY PHONE DING

Saw Gererra: OMG ORSON FELL????

Eren Jaëger: ...

Eren Jaëger: Meh. Ur problem

K-2SO: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAGAHAHAHA

Jyn Erso: srsly k2

Galen Erso: LYRA WHERE RU HES LOOKING PALE

Saw Gererra: Well duh. He didn't get a lot of sun exposure as a cadet

Thawn: WTBANTHA

Governor Pryce: DAFREEK

Wilhuff Tarkin: NOT THE TIME SAW

Lyra Erso: I'm pulling out of hyperspace now! Just hang on!

Cassian Andor: I should be pulling out of hyperspace soon

Bodhi Rook: What's going on?

Governor Pryce: THIS IS A KRYCE-SIS

Thawn: Galen what's his condition now?

Wilhuff Tarkin: omg I hope he's not dead

Cassian Andor: SAVE THE KRENNIC!! SAVE THE IMPERIAL!!

Saw Gererra: THATS MY LINE

Galen Erso: He's waking up

Lyra Erso: Don't let him move!

Cassian Andor: Just keep his head steady in case there's any damage

K-2SO: Break his neck!

Jyn Erso: K2...

Bodhi Rook: Wait what happened again?

K-2SO: Orson knocked himself unconscious by falling down the stairs at the Ersos and now he's bleeding

Jyn Erso: And K2 thinks it's funny

K-2SO: But it is. Heck it would be funny if it was anyone else except Cassian

Lyra Erso: I CAN SEE OUR HOUSE GALEN!!

Galen Erso: Plz hurry

Bodhi Rook:

Bodhi Rook: WAIT

Bodhi Rook: Galen, ur house doesn't have stairs

Lyra Erso: ...

Wilhuff Tarkin: ...

Jyn Erso: Oh yeahhhh... I forgot

Cassian Andor: ...

K-2SO: ...

Saw Gererra: ...

Thawn: ...

Governor Pryce: ...

Bodhi Rook: Galen..?

Orson Krennic: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH APRIL FOOLS!!!!

Orson Krennic: I GOT YOU THERE, DIDN'T I???

Orson Krennic: But seriously, come help. Galen hit his head against the doorframe and knocked himself out.

Lyra Erso: IM GONNA KILL YOU KRENNIC!!!

Cassian Andor: I'll help Galen and then help Lyra kill Krennic

Galen Erso: April Fools!

Galen Erso: I am alive and well

Jyn Erso:

K-2SO: Oohh!!! Haha! Funny!

Orson Krennic: I know, right?

Cassian Andor: Ru serious

Galen Erso: Hehehe

Lyra Erso: Dafuq

Cassian Andor: IMMA GONNA BREAK UR NECK KRENNIC THAT WAS NOT FUNNY

Governor Pryce: ^^

Thawn: Yeah what the heck

Wilhuff Tarkin: You have a terrible sense of humor Director

Cassian Andor: WE HAD A BONDING MOMENT I WAS ACTUALLY WORRIED ABOUT U

Orson Krennic: Awww, you're so sweet, Cassian Andor!

Orson Krennic: OMGOMG HELP HELP MAYDAY FOR REAL CASSIAN LOOKS FORCING SCARY

Galen Erso: AIIIEEEEEE HALP LYRAS GOT A FRYING PAN!!

Governor Pryce: Yeahhh... not gonna help you

Saw Gererra: I'm out:

Thawn: There's ur April fools. Getting hit over the head with a frying pan

Wilhuff Tarkin: That was a mean prank

Jyn Erso: U 2 deserve whatever Mama and Cassian do

Jyn Erso: Now is anyone going to help me here?

Bodhi Rook: I will because I'm a good friend!

Jyn Erso: Thx

Bodhi Rook: April Fool's! I'm gonna leave u there and soon ur phone will die and YOULL BE STRANDED AT THE GROCERY STORE LIKE NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM

Jyn Erso:

Jyn Erso: I hate this chat

K-2SO: U TWO WOULD BE A CUTE COUPLE AND WE SHALL CALL IT JYNHI OR EROOK

K-2SO: Kinda like Ebook except it's ERook
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Happy April Fools everyone!

Also, 10 points if you get the Voltron reference.

And sorry any Krennic lovers who might have had a heart attack while reading this chapter. Don't worry! I swear Orson is just fine! No April Fools.