Have you ever seen HISHE's How Rogue One Should Have Ended? Warning SPOILERS!!

I don't own anything.
========================================
Bodhi Rook: I want cookies

Jyn Erso: Great. Make some

Bodhi Rook: I can't cook

Jyn Erso: Neither can I

Chirrut Îmwe: I can make anything!

Baze Malbus: Can you bake a pie?

Chirrut Îmwe: No...

Baze Malbus: Neither can I

Bodhi Rook: Chirrut you're blind how can you cook?

Chirrut Îmwe: 😑 Magic. Duh

K-2SO: We should make cookies!

Cassian Andor: I can't cook tho

Jyn Erso: Neither can I

Baze Malbus: We're screwed

K-2SO: I DOWNLOADED A RECIPE INTO MY DATABANKS

Jyn Erso: GREAT TELL US WHAT TO DO

K-2SO: We are going to make Vanishing Oatmeal Raisin Cookies

Chirrut Îmwe: RAISINS?!?? EWWWWW

Bodhi Rook: RAISINS ARE NOT DISGUSTING

Chirrut Îmwe: They are when you put them in cookies

Jyn Erso: Let's put chocolate chips in the cookies instead of raisins

Everyone: YEAH

K-2SO: Okay! Ready to get started?

Everyone: *nods*

K-2SO: First! Preheat the oven to 350*F

Cassian Andor: Dammit you just HAD to use Fahrenheit

K-2SO: Something wrong with that?

Cassian Andor: Yeah the oven is set in Celsius

Jyn Erso: Done! Set it to 176

Bodhi Rook: Why does it only say 38?

Cassian Andor: It needs some time to heat up so we'll make cookies while we wait

Baze Malbus: What are we waiting for? Let's start!

K-2SO: In a large bowl, beat 1/2 cup plus 6 tablespoons of butter (softened), 3/4 cup of firmly packed brown sugar, and 1/2 cup of granulated sugar with an electric beater on medium until mixture is creamy

Cassian Andor: The butter's not soft

Chirrut Îmwe: What does brown sugar look like?

Baze Malbus: Like this

Jyn Erso: We can use my blow dryer to soften the butter!

K-2SO: That is a bad idea

Bodhi Rook: It won't take long

Jyn Erso: I think it is a great idea

[a minute later]

K-2SO: Congratulations. You have made a melted butter mess.

Jyn Erso: But at least it landed in the bowl

Cassian Andor: Blow dryers are so weird and I didn't know you used one

Jyn Erso: It's a necessity for every girl. Duh

Baze Malbus: CONTINUING

K-2SO: Add 2 eggs and 1 teaspoon of vanilla. Beat mixture well.

Bodhi Rook: Shoot. Just dropped an eggshell in

Cassian Andor: Well get it out!

Chirrut Îmwe: WHY ARE WE TEXTING AND BAKING COOKIES

Jyn Erso: I CANNOT LEAVE MY PHONE FOR THREE MINUTES OR ILL HAVE A SEIZURE

Cassian Andor: Ru serious?

Jyn Erso: It's a chronic disease called Phone Deprivation

Baze Malbus: What's next?

K-2SO: Now on to the dry stuff

K-2SO: In another bowl, sift 1 1/2 cups of all-purpose flour, 1 teaspoon of baking soda, 1 teaspoon of cinnamon, and 1/2 teaspoon of salt mix. Mix the dry stuff together and then dump it into the other bowl and mix it all together.

Baze Malbus: Easy enough where's the sifter?

Bodhi Rook: What's a sifter?

Chirrut Îmwe: HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW WHAT A SIFTER IS

Bodhi Rook: How do you know what it is? You can't see

Chirrut Îmwe: The Force, bro

Cassian Andor: I found the sifter

Jyn Erso: I found the flour

Baze Malbus: Why is it all-purpose?

Bodhi Rook: I feel like that is a stupid question that doesn't need to be answered

Bodhi Rook: OH NO I SOUND LIKE K2

Cassian Andor: Okay we sifted... now what?

K-2SO: I already told you. Put the dry stuff into the other stuff

Bodhi Rook: So we used a bowl for NO OTHER REASON BESIDES TO MIX DRY STUFF WHEN WE COULD HAVE SHAVED OURSELVES A DISH

Jyn Erso: Why does it matter? It's one dish

Bodhi Rook: IT'S CUTTING INTO MY TIME OF PLOTTING PILOT²

Cassian Andor: NO SHIP FIGHTS TODAY!! LETS JUST BAKE COOKIES

Baze Malbus: WHY ARE WE ALL SHOUTING SJDLWKGNEN

Chirrut Îmwe: WHY NOT!??

Chirrut Îmwe: K we mixed it all

K-2SO: Add 3 cups of oats (they suggest Quaker Oats) and 1 cup of chocolate chips. Mix well.

Cassian Andor: Wayyy too much mixing

Bodhi Rook: Let's add two cups of chocolate chips!

Jyn Erso: YEAH

Baze Malbus: You guys have a big sweet tooth

Bodhi Rook: We're British. Duh

iggy's eyebrows: I FIND THAT OFFENSIVE

Eren Jaëger: It's tru tho. U British have a big sweet tooth

[Cassian Andor has depeopled the chat from anime (A/N: DEPEOPLED IS A WORD)]

Cassian Andor: Next!

K-2SO: Drop dough by rounded tablespoonfuls onto ungreased cookie sheets.

Jyn Erso: Let's make one big cookie!

Bodhi Rook: No let's make little round cookies!

Chirrut Îmwe: ROUND COOKIES FTW

Baze Malbus: Is anyone going to get off their phone and help Cassian and I?

Cassian Andor: This is a lot of cookie dough

K-2SO: It does say it makes 4 dozen cookies

Jyn Erso: Okay we filled the two pans with a lot of dough left over. The oven just dinged saying it's ready. Now what?

K-2SO: Bake 8-10 minutes or until light golden brown.

Cassian Andor: Okay I'll put them in

[8-10 minutes later]

Baze Malbus: They smell great!

Bodhi Rook: let's take them out!

Cassian Andor: They do look done...

Chirrut Îmwe: Wouldn't do that Cassian...

Cassian Andor: QOFJWLFHWKFJDJSBSBAUUUUUGGGHHH

Jyn Erso: Use an oven mitt next time u dummy

Baze Malbus: I got them out now what?

K-2SO: Cool 1 minute on the cookie sheets then removed cookies and put them on a wire rack

K-2SO: I am not a wire rack Bodhi

Bodhi Rook: Do we even have wire racks?

Chirrut Îmwe: AHA WE SHALL USE THIS

K-2SO: ... that's Galen's Kyber Crystal inhancer

Chirrut Îmwe: But it has rungs.

Bodhi Rook: It will work!

Baze Malbus: If anyone cares, I found three actual wire racks

Bodhi Rook: Y u take all the fun out Baze :(

Baze Malbus: ... kill me plz

Jyn Erso: We'll use the real ones

K-2SO: In the meantime, roll up some more cookies and put them back on the sheets and into the oven!

Baze Malbus: And the ones that are already done?

K-2SO: Cool completely before storing in a tightly covered container.

[about another 10 minutes later]

Jyn Erso: DONE!!

Cassian Andor: Let's try one!

Chirrut Îmwe: Ewwww they're too sweet

Bodhi Rook: they're really hard

Baze Malbus: I got a burnt one

K-2SO: I cannot eat

Cassian Andor: ack! I got an eggshell in mine

Jyn Erso: I think I broke a tooth

Everyone: ...

Everyone: ...

Everyone: BEST COOKIES EVER!!!

Jyn Erso: Let's give one to Krennic!!

Jyn Erso > Orson Krennic

Jyn Erso: Krenny! Try a cookie!

Orson Krennic: You know you could have just walked up to me and talked instead of walking up to me and texting.

Jyn Erso: I have a chronic disease called Phone Deprivation

Orson Krennic: -_-

Jyn Erso: Try a cookie!

Orson Krennic: Wow. They. Are. Amazing.

Jyn Erso: Yay!

[Jyn Erso has texted in group chat 'CASSIAN IS KRIFFING HOT AND NONONE CAN CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE']

Jyn Erso: HE LIKED THEM!!

Bodhi Rook: Then why is Galen dragging him to the med bay?

Jyn Erso: He probably passed out from how amazing they are

Cassian Andor: We are the best cooks ever!

K-2SO: 😸

Baze Malbus: :D

Chirrut Îmwe: 😊
========================================
This is actually a real cookie recipe (brought to you by Quaker Oats). If you would like to make some, feel free to pick through the chapter (only use K2's instructions) or Message me so you don't have to pick through the chapter. And for anyone living at High Altitude the flour is increased from 1-1/2 cups to 1-3/4 cups. Also, you can use raisins instead of Chocolate chips.

Please review!