~a week later~

I stared at the tests for what was probably the millionth time this week. I still can't believe this. I'm pregnant against my will. Of course I have always wanted to be a mom, but with someone I love and with someone who loves me, not by some gang member douche bag. I have to get my shit together.

My mom was always warning me about making her same mistakes. She always said she wouldn't change those mistakes, though, because it gave her me. Now I'm younger than mom was when she got pregnant. Even though I was raped I can't help but to feel as if I let mom down somehow.

I wish my mom was alive, she'd know what to do. Sadly, she isn't alive, but my dad is alive. I should go see him, he'll know what to do. I hope.

I got out my phone and texted sweet pea.

Me: hey Pea, can you take me to Shankshaw? I need to talk to my dad about something

Sweet Pea🐍: sure, I'll be there in ten. Finishing up some serpent business

Me: okay no rush, except visitation ends at 8:15

Sweet Pea🐍: got it.

I went to my room and got dressed. After I got dressed I made sure at least one of my pregnancy tests were in my pocket.

I hope dad knows what to do. I guess I should start a journal to the baby. Well, more for me to keep my sanity in this madness than it is for the baby. I rummaged through all my notebooks and found an empty one. I sighed and sat at the kitchen table. I opened the notebook the the first page and started writing.

The terms of this pregnancy isn't one you'd hope for, but it is my reality and I accept that. For the next seven to eight months I plan to document everything I felt every day of the pregnancy starting with today.

11/16/2017:

I feel nervous. I'm going to tell my father today in hopes he knows what to do.

After I finished the sentence I was writing there was a knock on the door. As I made my way to the door my phone vibrated. Probably Pea telling me he's here so I ignore it. I opened the front door.

"Hey Pea. Ready to go?"

"Yeah. Let's roll,"

We walked to his motorcycle. I gulped a bit and stood there nervously. Sweet Pea noticed the uneasy tension in the air so he turned to face me.

"You alright?"

"Oh, yeah. Just I don't know if I can ride anymore. At least not today,"

He looked at me confused and the stepped closer to me. He gripped my upper arms in a comforting manner. He bent his body at his stomach to look me in the eyes.

"Why not?"

"I'm... Uh.. I'm pregnant and I have one of the tests in my back pocket to show my dad," I whispered, barely audible.

With that said he pulled me into a hug. He made a thousand promises to kill every last Goulie in Riverdale, old or young. I tried to tell him it's okay, that he didn't need to do that, but I just kept giggling at his promises. He's so cute when he's trying to be the big and bad serpent.

"Come on. Let's just take your uncle's truck," he said after a while.

I nodded and went to Uncle Dave's truck. I got into the passenger seat and Sweets got into the drivers. I got the keys out of my bag and handed them to him.

Once we were off it was a silent trip. Not the unbearable type of silence, but the kind where it is kind of comfortable and also kind of thick because no one knows what to say or do.

After what felt like a few short minutes, even though it was probably longer, we were pulling into a parking spot at Shankshaw Penitentiary. The lot was somewhat packed, but it could be staff added in to the guests parking, but I'm not sure. I don't know how prisons work.

We walked through the parking lot. I looked at some of the cars trying to find out if I knew anyone or if some of them were the staff. My phone was going off like crazy in my pocket. I figured it was Jughead so I'll just text him back after I see dad. As Sweet Pea and I got to the doors of the prison I saw Jughead and Archie leaving. I guess it wasn't Jughead that was texting me. I made eye contact with Archie for a split moment and in that moment Archie gave me a very confused look. When I realized it was at me and not at Sweets Jughead and him were already to Fred's old truck and pulling out of their spot.

Sweet Pea gently placed his hand around my elbow to get my attention. I looked at him and he gestured to the doors of the prison. I just follow him, the nerves of seeing FP for the first time in years, and directly after I find out he's my father, were getting the best of me. I don't know what to to say. I don't know how to tell him he's going to be a grandpa. I'm terrified to tell him it was a Ghoulie that raped me and beat the shit out of Jughead. Let alone that it was the leader of the Ghoulies and that I was promised to him by my step-dad.

"Come on, Aydon. We can go see him," Sweet Pea said, pulling me out of thought.

"Okay. What do I say to him? Do I flat out say 'Hey I'm your daughter and oh, yeah, I was raped by the lead Ghoulie and now I'm pregnant'?" I panicked.

I head someone clear their throat, but it was muffled as if behind a wall or a window. I slowly turned to the direction the muffled noise came from. There stood my dad with stubble covered cheeks and chin. Probably from being in prison since the week or so before I moved here.

"What did you say?" He said, the glass window blocking out most of his volume.

"Shit. My rant was heard by other ears... I need to learn to be more aware of my surroundings when ranting in a panic." I stated.

Dad and Sweet Pea both nodded. They both wore slight smirks on their faces. Dad's tired and rugged face looked more alive and a happy since I just noticed him. I don't think anyone would look that alive or happy, yet there was a hint of disappointment and shame in his eyes most likely from whatever he had spoke to Jughead and Archie about, while incarcerated.

"Girl, are you gonna just stand there in a panic or are you gonna sit down, pick up the communication device and tell me the reasoning of your visit with one of my Serpents?" Dad said from behind the glass.

I let out a shaky breath in attempts to calm down, it didn't work, because apparently I had begun to hold my breath. I was so scared and nervous. so many thoughts began to fill my head. I don't know how he is going to react to any of this. Everything I am about to tell him is a lot to process, even for me and it's my damn life I'm explaining. I walked over to the seat on my side of the window that was in front of dad. I sat down, Sweet Pea sat beside by stealing a chair from a section going unused, and I grabbed the telephone that was on my side. Dad did the same and we put the phones to our ears at the same time. I looked at him to see what features I had possibly gotten from him. All I saw was our faces get the same eye shadows and dullness when we're exhausted. So, I guess the only other thing I got from my dad was my attitude and plotting, which Jughead has too.

"Hey F.P." I finally said.

"Hey pumpkin."

we both smiled at the nickname that got lost in history somewhere. It felt like I was back at the Jones trailer and had no worries in the world. F.P. and Gladys always looked at me as a child they never had. they would always let me stay at their house if I didn't have school the next day, because they knew about the abuse I sustained from my, who I thought at the time was my biological, father. I remember the first time he called me pumpkin, I decided to bring it up to him.

"Do you remember the first time you called me pumpkin?"

His smile grew wider and his eyes wrinkled. His eyeballs sparkled in recollection. This caused my smile to grow. I was not really expecting him to remember that memory of so long ago. Jughead and I were only six years old. Now he's seventeen and I'll be seventeen in a few months.

"Of course. It was the first year you spent Thanksgiving at our house instead of at your own. You ate almost all the pumpkin pie. Pumpkin wasn't your nickname for at least six months. For the first couple months it was Pumpkin Face, because after you finished eating your pieces of pie you had pie and whipped cream all over your mouth and cheeks."

I heard someone laugh beside me. I looked at Sweet Pea with a serious face. He instantly stopped laughing but still had a smile on his face.

"Yeah, it's hard to believe I'll be seventeen in a few short months. Time really does fly, huh?"

Dad nodded at my comment with a half smile. He seemed as if he hated something about my statement.

"So, what you come here for. I'm sure it's not to reminisce about the past."

I laughed nervously before speaking, "yeah, I wish I was, but I was here to talk to you about a few things."

He raised an eyebrow as of to tell me he's listening and for me to continue. The look that always reassured me. The look that always got me talking about me deepest and darkest secrets.

I sigh before answering, "Did you know I was your daughter? Before the court stuff and changing my name?"

He was silent for a few minutes. I watched his very subtle movements for any sign of if he knew it not. He finally spoke, "I did. Your mother left me copies of journal entries."

I guess mom did that to both of us and uncle Dave.

"Is there anything else you wanted to talk about?"

I nodded my head and tried thinking of a way to ask him about Jughead. I was trying to get the good-ish stuff out of the way before dropping the bomb of the rape and pregnancy.

"First, before I ask what I want to, can I call you dad? Or daddy?"

His lips twitched up as his eyes lit up and his smile caused smile lines around his mouth and his eyes wrinkled. As I observed his face I noticed that FP is where I got those features from. Suddenly my thoughts were cut off by FP speaking, "of course, Pumpkin. You are my daughter and I am your father. It's only right."

I smiled happily then it dropped into a slight smirk, "what was Juggy doing here?"

His face dropped before dropping, "he and the Andrew's boy wanted to know what to do about the Ghoulies. We settled on a drag race t I'm win turf. If Ghoulies win they get Southside High, the Wyrm and Sunnyside. We win they back down. You alright, girl?"

He must have saw my face drop when he said Ghoulies. I sigh before answering, "not really, Daddy. Ghoulies jumped me and Jug just a little while ago. While Juggy was knocked out the leader raped me while some of the others held me down. He said I was promised to him by Alistair. Daddy, I'm pregnant. And I'm terrified the Ghoulies will take my baby away when they're born."

Dad looked pissed. He also had that thinking look on his face. He's probably trying to think of a way to get me out of this mess. Before he could answer the guards on both sides told us visitation was over. Dad told them to hold on a minute.

Dad spoke to me, "don't let the Ghoulies find out. It's almost fall so you can easily add layers when in Southside."

I nodded and replied, "okay, Daddy. I love you. Stay safe."

He nodded and flashed me a comforting smile. He was taken back to the cells and I looked at Sweet Pea.

"Sweets, I'm scared. I don't know if I can do this without Dad."

Sweet Pea hugged me and the guided me up and out of the building. He helped me up into the truck and buckled me into my seat. I was numb.

"Aydon, you can do this. You us to help."

Without even thinking I blurted out, "yeah. Good thing my initiation starts tomorrow."

Sweets just looked at me like he already knew and started driving to his trailer. I unlocked my phone and checked the message that kept going off.

Unknown number: You and your uncle count as Northside. Watch your back and I'll be keeping in touch

My blood ran cold. Who was this?