The remainder of the journey back to Yohan's flat unfolded in a stifling silence, the weight of unspoken words and unresolved emotions hanging heavily in the air. Yohan, his hands shoved deep into the pockets of his denim vest, exuded an aura of reticence. The quiet between them grew deafening, uninterrupted even by the gentle hum of passing cars on the low-lit street.

     The dim glow from the streetlamps cast long shadows on the pavement as they reached the looming block of flats. Yohan, wordless, offered a feeble smile in Robin's direction before disappearing into the entrance, leaving Robin standing alone before the imposing structure.

     As Yohan vanished from sight, a hollow ache settled in Robin's chest. The encounter had left him with a myriad of questions and a lingering sense of unease. The once vibrant and lively evening had transformed into a sombre reflection of confusion and unexpected revelations.

     Robin stood there, his breath shallow, legs weakened, losing feeling in his arms. The stillness of the night seemed to envelop him, amplifying the gravity of the situation. It was as if the world had momentarily frozen, allowing him to confront the echoes of Yohan's whispered words.

     A sudden buzzing in his pocket jolted him back to the present, prompting him to retrieve his phone. The glaring screen displayed an incoming call from his mum, and the small clock in the corner revealed the time: 11:15 p.m.

     "Shit," Robin muttered to himself as he quickly answered.

    "Robin William Coy, where are you? You were supposed to be home 15 minutes ago?!" Her voice, though stern, carried an overarching sense of worry. His mum was sweet, and he knew she wouldn't be mad, but it was his dad he was worried about.

     "Sorry, mum, I walked a friend home... I'm only around the corner; I'll be home soon."

     "How soon is soon? I'm worried. I thought you said you'd get a taxi back. I don't want you wandering around the city late at night."

     "It's only like a ten-minute walk, mum. Don't worry, I'll be fine."

     "Don't be ridiculous; I'm going to get you!" He could hear keys jangling on the other end of the phone and the distant sound of a door opening and slamming shut. "Where are you, darling?"

     "Big flats, by Redcliff."

     "Don't move a muscle; I'll be with you in just a moment." The warmth of his mother's concern provided a stark contrast to the chill of the night , and Robin leaned against the side of the towering building, glancing back at the entrance Yohan had disappeared into.

♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡

     A Fiat Punto glided to a gentle stop on the gravel-covered tarmac in front of the block of flats where Robin lingered. The wheels emitted a distinctive crunching sound as the car came to a stop. Through the windscreen, Robin spotted his mum, her expression etched with concern. He walked around the car, the gravel shifting beneath his shoes, and settled into the passenger seat.

    His mum turned off the car engine, pivoting to face him with a mixture of relief and worry in her eyes.

     "Darling, we were just worried."

     "I know, mum... I'm sorry."

     "If you're going to be later than you said, you should have told us at least."

     "Sorry... I know."

     "Your father was going to call you at half past 10, but I insisted on telling him it was a good sign you were out late with friends. Did you at least have a nice time?"

     Did I have a nice time? Robin wasn't really sure anymore. For the first half of the night, he had felt on cloud nine, ecstatic even. But what happened between him and Yohan just moments earlier had left a sour taste in his mouth.

     What had even happened between us? We almost kissed in the smoking area, but did we? Is it all in my head? Maybe you just imagined Yohan leaning in closer. You were pretty drunk at that point... but Yohan started drinking like crazy after that moment happened. Why did he drink so much when everyone else only had what, two or three drinks? I lost track of how many Yohan had... And the alley. Why did he get so emotional? Sure, some people cry when they drink, but those words...

     'I don't like boys.'

     Recalling what Yohan had said made Robin want to turn his skin inside out. Was he coming on too strong? Was Yohan trying to tell him to back off? He did get even more upset when Robin was touching him. Maybe he knew Robin liked him and was too polite to tell him to go away? But then why had he been so nice to him before, read with him, invited him out for a drink before the show... why? The questions lingered in Robin's mind, casting a shadow over the night that had started with such promise.

     "Yeah, it was fun mum, thanks for picking me up." That was all he could say, turning to his mother and trying his best to fake a smile.

     "I'm glad, honey. Next time, just let us know, okay?" She smiled back at him weakly, her eyes scanning his face. "Alright, party animal, let's get you home and into bed," she said as she turned on the ignition to start the short drive home.

♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡

     Robin couldn't sleep. He sprawled face-up on his bed, clad only in boxers, atop the sheet. His gaze remained fixed on the ceiling, his legs and arms splayed across the expanse of his double mattress. The curtains, neglected and undrawn, permitted the full moon's ethereal glow to cascade into the room through the window above his desk. The garden trees cast playful shadows that seemed to dance on the ceiling, adding a touch of whimsy to the otherwise sombre atmosphere. A gentle breeze wafted through the open window, lightly caressing Robin's face and providing a subtle comfort in the stillness of the night.

    Even though his dad spoke, it was like the words bounced right off him. Robin's mind was consumed by the night's events, playing on a continuous loop as he desperately searched for a clue, a moment, that could bring clarity to the chaos.

     After his father concluded his lecture, Robin mumbled a quick apology before hastily ascending the stairs to his room. Once inside, he didn't bother retrieving his phone from his jeans pocket. Instead, he kicked off his jeans, shed his jacket and shirt, and flung the frustratingly tight band t-shirt across the room before collapsing onto the bed. The passage of time was uncertain as he lay there, caught between a racing and numb mind. Seconds might have felt like hours, but the whirlwind of thoughts persisted.

     How could I have been so stupid?

     He yielded to the involuntary motions of his body, shifting onto his side and curling into a protective ball. His gaze fixed on the floor of his bedroom, where his jeans lay splattered with sick—his sick. The jacket, a garment Yohan had removed on his behalf , lay nearby, a silent witness to the tumultuous events.

     His eyes travelled towards the corner of the room where he had impulsively tossed the tight band t-shirt. It had become ensnared by the sleeve on the handle of his wardrobe, dangling in a seemingly mocking dance with the room's breeze.

     Stupid fucking shirt...

     His attention veered towards a subtle glow emanating from the jeans strewn on the floor, accompanied by a short, audible buzzing noise. Emitting a disgruntled groan, he made a determined effort to reach for the jeans just beyond his immediate grasp. Shuffling his body forward on the bed, he was determined to maintain contact with the mattress, managing to hook a finger on the belt loop and tug them within reach.

     Upon delving into the pocket where he anticipated finding his phone, his fingers encountered something unexpectedly cold. Curiosity piqued, he allowed his fingers to envelop the frigid object, extracting it from the denim confines. Holding it up to his face, he scrutinised the metal item.

     I've still got his lighter...

     It was old-fashioned— the kind that required a refill of lighter fluid and demanded the flicking up of the lid to access the wheel for igniting the flame. Its well-worn appearance bore the marks of obvious scratches and dents on its surface, the imperfections standing out under the moonlight, making the metal gleam as Robin held it between his fingers. His thumb instinctively traced the back of the lighter, encountering deep scratches. He flipped it over to find the engraving.

     "For Eliza"

     "Who's Eliza...?" Robin muttered under his breath as he peered at it closer, expecting the lighter to reveal its secrets.

     His jeans illuminated once more with the light of his phone, and a muffled buzzing sound distracted his attention. He placed the lighter gently on his bedside table as he continued with his original mission.

     Wrestling his phone out of the jeans, he let the screen turn on, revealing to him that it was almost two am. The little bubble on the bottom of the lock screen showed five text messages from Ashley and one from the group chat. He slid his thumb across the screen to read them.

     Ashley <3 18:34

     Good luck tonight!!!! Please please please take some pictures/video's I want to seeeeeee xxxx

     Ashley <3 19:02

     I'm actually so jealous of you :( I'm literally sat alone in my room, plz tell me how it's going I want to know xxx

     Ashley <3 20:35

     WHY WON'T YOU LOOK AT YOUR PHONE I'M DYING OVER HERE PLEASE TELL ME HOW IT'S GOING OMG xx

     Ashley <3 21:45

     Okay sorry that was unnecessary of me... but I'm just so excited for you :') xxxx

     Ashley <3 01:45

     I assume you've gone home now? Please call me in the morning when you finally look at your phone >:( ... Unless it went really well and you're still with a certain someone hehehehe ;) xxxx love you

     Robin rolled onto his back, his gaze fixed on the messages from Ashley. As he read through the words on the screen, a lump formed in his throat, and he felt the sting of tears in his eyes. Despite the desire to respond, his thumbs hovered over the keyboard, frozen in the face of emotional turmoil. Unable to summon the strength, he diverted his attention to the group chat.

     Jemma: 01:52

     Boooooo look at how much fun we had! Robin is my new bestie btw the rest of you can get fucked muhahahahah <3 xxxxxxx

     Robin clicked on the photo to get a better look. He hadn't even remembered Jemma taking the photo. She was the main one in frame, having taken it at a selfie angle. Lizzy was next to her, allowing a slight smile to emerge from her cool demeanour . Lucas was barely recognisable with the blur of him flailing his arms about. He saw himself at the back of the photo, sipping on his water. Yohan sat next to him, not looking at the photo—not even registering that a photo was being taken—he was looking at him.

     Robin zoomed in on the photo. Yohan's eyes were downturned, his mouth curving into a gentle smile as he observed Robin in the image. The emotion captured seemed almost tender, a sentiment that Robin struggled to define.

     What the fuck? This is all too confusing, for fucks sake.

     Allowing his hand to fall to the side of his face, still clutching his phone, the screen's glow cast a light that extended into the room, dispelling the dancing shadows on the ceiling. In that moment of illumination, he grappled with the conflicting emotions swirling within.

     This is why I don't allow myself to get attached to boys. This is why I don't even let myself daydream about a boy. I knew I was just going to end up getting hurt. And that is exactly what happened. I let Yohan be at the forefront of my mind. I had even imagined us together. I even let myself think that they almost kissed tonight! But it must have all been in my imagination — but the photo.

     The photo told a different story. In that frozen moment, Yohan's gaze exuded care and kindness.

     Robin squeezed his eyes shut, his body tensing with a mix of frustration, confusion, and irritation coursing through his being. The conflicting emotions seemed to invade not only his body but his very soul. Reopening his eyes, he directed his gaze back up at the ceiling, seeking solace in the blank expanse above.

     It's all my fault. He was drunk; maybe I took advantage of him without knowing... Fuck, I did this. I caused him to get so upset; it was all me. He never wanted to hang out with me in the first place. I'm sure of that.

     A heavy pit settled in his stomach, slowly twisting with a sour sense of guilt. It weighed on him, a burden that whispered accusations of being the cause of it all.

     With a heavy heart, he allowed his eyes to close, and a single tear betrayed his emotional turmoil, escaping from the corner of his eye and trickling down his cheek, leaving a trail of wetness on his ear.

     The exhaustion of the emotional rollercoaster engulfed him, his body growing heavy as he succumbed to the pull of sleep. In the quiet solitude of his room, the echoes of the night and the tangled emotions followed him into the realm of dreams, leaving him to confront the aftermath of his own inner turmoil. 

A/N: Hello everyone! Just wanted to say thank you again so so so much for reading my story <3 and I'm so chuffed I've reached over 1K views!!! I appreicate you even more sticking through these's sad ass chapters haha - Yohan and Robin both be going through it. 

Speacial thanks to~ @woundedsouul , @Lewis_Black , @EvilMaybeWriter , @reveriestuck and  for all your lovely lovely comments from almost day 1 <3 It always makes me smile to see them! Please check out their stories if you can they're all amazing writers!!!!