I didn't go back to cheer practice on Monday. Or the day after. It was only a matter of time before I finally made it official. No one wanted me around. They didn't want me, they wanted Roberta. Strong, confident, "girl perfect" Roberta. Not me. Whoever I was. 

I went to Mrs. Smith, our gym teacher to resign. I explained well; I couldn't handle it. It was too overwhelming. As I spoke to her, I caught Amy looking over my shoulder. She looked so upset. Maybe even a little betrayed. Nothing new. She even looked like she was about to cry. She grabbed my shoulder, stopping me. 

But she didn't have it in her to be mad. "Just... why? Why would you do this? Are you that far gone? Is Roberta dead?"

I kept packing my things, taking them out of the gym locker. "Maybe. I don't know. I think so. Either way, those guys don't like the person I am now." I put my red pom-pom in the box. "Even if Roberta isn't dead, I need to take some time to figure out what I am now."

"What will you do?"

"Maybe I'll hike. My dad owns a nature center. I might go full on nature kid." I shrugged. "I don't really care either way. I just want to... leave this behind. At least for a little bit. If I decide to come back, it'll only be after I've looked at all my options."

"And if you decide not to?" She asked. 

I sighed. "Then it's up to you and Emma. I... I know I really hurt her, but... she's still a good person. I know that the girl I met back then is still there. Even if she's not anymore, she's still a good leader. She's peppy and sweet. People like her. Better than me at least."

"No one could be better than you."

"Except you." I said. She looked surprised. "You're my protege, right? You've got to get better than me."

She sighed. "Okay. I promise. Emma and I will put our differences aside. At least for the sake of this team."

"Alright then." I said. I pulled my pom-poms out of the box and handed them to her. "One for you, one for Emma. At least my legacy will live on."

"You talk like you're never coming back."

I stood in the doorway, and I looked back at her. "I may not. But if I don't, and I decide to kill Roberta for good, I will never forget you." I turned away. "I'll never forget you, Amy."