On June second we got home for a short break before festivals. We hadn't been home very long when I got a call from Naomi.
"Alana's mother will over tomorrow to pick up Alana."
"Oh."
"She said she'd be by around nine. Make sure Alana is all packed."
"Ok."
"I'm sorry, Mr. Kropp. I know this isn't easy." I sighed.
"It's okay." It wasn't, but I wasn't about to tell her that. She ended the call and I made my way upstairs to tell Alana. I knocked and waited.
"Who's there?"
"Me." I said. Then I opened the door.
"What d'you need, Remi?" She'd taken to calling me Remi shortly after my birthday.
"You're mom is gonna be picking you up at nine tomorrow."
"Oh. Okay."
"You can text me or call me anytime. You know that right?" She nodded. "Please. Call me if anything happens."
"Why do you care so much?"
"You've been living with me for awhile. I've gotten attached to you. You're a sweet kid. I'm sad to see you go." I sat on the end of Cherry's bed. "I kinda like this whole parenting thing. I know I'm not great at it yet, but I dunno . . . It's hard to explain."
"It's been strange to see what a real family looks like." She said softly. She kept her eyes on the floor and let her hair fell in her face. "For as long as I can remember Mom's been angry. About everything." She reached up and wiped at her face, "All I ever wanted was for her to love me. But all I am is a mistake and an inconvenience." I slid off the bed onto the floor and pulled Alana into a hug.
"You're not a mistake. Or an inconvenience. You'll always have a place here if you need or want it. I love you, Alana." I pulled her into my lap and she cried into my shoulder.
"I don't wanna go back." I rubbed her back and rested my head against hers while blinking back tears.
"I know. I'm sorry, kiddo. I don't want you to go either." We sat there like that for a quite awhile. Alana sniffed and moved so she was more comfortable by putting her arms around my neck.
"You're a great dad, Remi. Cherry's lucky." It's funny how quickly we become attached to people. She'd been staying with me for two months and already I thought of her as my kid. She was my kid. And I didn't want to lose her. But in the end that's what being a foster parent is. Getting attached and being forced to let go when you don't want to. But I wouldn't change anything.

———

Cherry cried herself to sleep the first night after Alana left. She flat out refused to go to bed the second night and by the third night was so tired she went to bed without complaint. I hadn't realized she was so attached to Alana. For the rest of the week she kept asking when Alana would come back and how much longer before she did. But before I knew it we were leaving again. And I had other things on my mind.

———

At home Cherry slept in her own bed. On the rare occasion she'd climb in bed with Mon and I, but mostly she'd just come and make sure I was still there before going back to bed.
   In the time we'd been at home I forgotten what it was like to share a bed with her. She squirmed a lot in her sleep.
Once she settled I managed to drift off, only to wake a short time later when Cherry put her hand on my face. She'd done that every night since tour started. I didn't know why. She just put her hand my face, run it gently over my nose and eyes and then go back to sleep. It was like she was making sure it was still me beside her. She settled again and I went back to sleep. When I woke again it was still dark and quiet on the bus. Well, mostly quiet. Cherry was crying.
"Stargazer?" I whispered. "What's wrong?"
"I sowwy."
"Why are you sorry?" I asked, moving so I could see her outline in the dark.
"I no mean to." She said. I felt around for my phone and turned the flashlight on. I blinked and squinted and rubbed my eyes until I could see. Cherry was sitting up, her face was red and wet with tears. I push myself into a sitting position and discovered there was a large wet spot on the bed. I lifted the blankets off my lap and sighed.
"D'you wet the bed, Stargazer?" She nodded. "'S-'s okay." I told her. I turned off my flashlight and slid out of the bunk before lifting Cherry out. I decided to deal with the bed in the morning. I found clean clothes for Cherry and myself and went into the bathroom so I could clean her up. I used a washcloth and gave her a sponge bath, then dressed her and sent her out to the couch while I got changed. Then I joined Cherry on the couch. Although I usually just slept in my underwear I had put on sweats and a hoodie because all of our blankets were dirty. The two of us sat on the couch and stargazed for awhile before eventually falling asleep.

———

"Deedee." Cherry poked me in the face. "Deedee?" I groaned and opened one eye. "You wake yet?"
"No." She giggled.
"You silly." I smiled and closed my eyes.
"Deedee, I's hungy." She put one hand my chest to support her weight and with the other lifted one of my eyelids.
"Stargazer." I mumbled, "hurts." She let go of my eyelid and sat back. I rubbed my eye and then opened them again. She was sitting in front of me with her arms cross, pouting.
"Alright. 'M up. Le's get food." I stood and stretched then shuffled around in the kitchen, opening doors and drawers trying to find breakfast. I got a bowl of cereal ready for her and filled her sippy cup with juice. She climbed up to the table and started to eat. I slumped back down on the couch and closed my eyes. My phone rang.
"'Ello?" I said around a yawn.
"H-hi Remi. Sorry to bother you." It was Alana.
"'S not a bother. Wha's up kiddo?"
"Mom has guy in the house and he-he's looking for me. Keeps saying he wants to play. I'm scared." My eyes popped open.
"Where are you?"
"I'm hiding. I'm okay for now, but I don't know what I'll do if he doesn't leave soon." She was crying.
"I d-I don't know what to do. D'you want me to call the police?"
"I don't know!" She cried. I raked my hand through my hair and stood up.
"Give me the address." I told her. She told me the address.
"Don't go! Please!"
"I won't. I promise." I started pacing. We kept the talking going, mostly small talk, but it kept her mind off of her current situation.
"I think he's gone."
"Alana, don't do-"
"Bye Remi."
"Al-" But she ended the call. I tried calling her three times, but she didn't answer. I prayed to god nothing bad had happened to her. And I was flooded with relief when she texted me a couple hours later, telling me the guy was gone and so was her mother.

———

Cherry's birthday caught up with me way too fast. But I managed to come up with a few things to do for her. Starting with the concert on the night of her birthday.
"Does anyone here know the song Down By The Bay?" People screamed, hands went up. I grinned. "Sing it with me?" I asked. They screamed again. "Down by the bay!" I started and everyone joined me. "Where the watermelons grow!" I looked my right and saw Cherry bouncing with excitement. I crouched and waved her over. She came running over and I picked her up. I kept singing and she started singing with me.
"Back to ma home I dare not go for if I do ma mumma will say haf you eva seen mooth kissin' a gooth down ba da bay!" I held the mic close enough to her that it made her voice louder.
"Down by the bay!" She was laughing and smiling and singing. We finished and everyone cheered again. I laughed and kissed the side of Cherry's head.
"Appsles and nananas!" Cherry yelled.
"Apples and Bananas?" I asked her.
"Yeah!" I smiled and looked at the crowd.
"She requested Apples and Bananas. Anyone know that song?" Screams and hands again. "Can you start?" I asked Cherry.
"I 'ike ta eat, eat, eat appsles and nananas." I joined her and everyone else followed suit.
"I like to eat, eat, eat apples and bananas." We sang through the whole song and Cherry cheered and clapped when we finished.
"Happy birthday, Stargazer!" I gave her a hug and kissed the side of her head.
"What a birfday?" She asked.
"It's the day you were born. You're five today. Remember Daddy's birthday? Everyone sang and we had cake and presents."
"I's get peasants too?"
"Yup."
"Otay." I smiled.
"Today is Cherry's birthday. Wanna sing happy birthday with me?" I asked the crowd. Everyone screamed. "Happy birthday to you." Sebastian stepped up beside me and put his arms out for Cherry. She put her arms out and leaned toward him so I let him take her. While we sang Emerson came over with a cupcake with a lit candle that looked like a five on top of it. Cherry didn't know what to do with it. She just stared mesmerized. "You're supposed to blow it out, Stargazer."
"Why?"
"I dunno, that's what you do."
"Oh. Otay!" She took a deep breath and blew out. There was no doubting her cupcake was covered in spit. Luckily she was only one who'd be eating it. Emerson took the candle off and handed her the cupcake. "I eat it now?"
"Go ahead." She started licking the frosting off. "Can you go eat it over there?" I pointed to side of the stage where she'd been standing before we started singing Down By The Bay.
"Uh-huh!" I kissed her again and Sebastian put her down. She ran over to where she'd been sitting before and sat down on the floor to eat her cupcake. I watched for a few minutes before Sebastian said my name and told me we needed to keep the show going.

———

After meeting as many fans as we could outside  we packed up and went back to the bus. The inside of the bus was filled with balloons and birthday decorations. Beauty and Beast decorations to be specific. A pile of presents sat on the table. We had cupcakes and she opened her presents. I let her play with her new toys for a few minutes, but it was late and we were tired and we had a plane to catch the next day. I lay awake for a long time thinking about Cherry and Alana and hoping Alana was okay.