Blinking away grit, I awoke from a dreamless sleep. Memories came rushing back and I winced at my own stupidity. Just as I had started to think I could possibly have helped against the foxes, I had somehow managed to rip off the leg of my own medicine cat! 

Tropicpalm was dead. She had to be.

With a groan, I buried my nose deeper into the soft moss. My ears picked up a soft shifting of herbs and then a medicinal aroma settled around me. I let out a sigh and lifted my head weakly to greet my visitor. Cloudypaw was fumbling with several leaves, uncertainty was static in her fur. 

Despite my misgivings for her choice to continue as a medicine cat, I couldn't help the raw sympathy in my voice, "How are you doing without Tropicpalm to help you?"

She started chewing up a few herbs in her mouth, murmuring, "I have everything under control. Besides, Yellowbelly is here to help."

"Oh." I nodded, remembering, "I forgot about her."

Cloudypaw snapped sourly, "Of course you would. You're a warrior."

Bristling, I retorted, "I'm still an apprentice. I'm learning!"

There was an icy silence before my sister ducked her head and mumbled, "Right, sorry, you don't know yet."

I stared at her, "What?"

Cloudypaw opened her mouth as if to say something, then closed it and glanced over to where Beestripe had burst into the medicine den. 

My mother's eyes were shining with tears and her whiskers were quivering, "Honeypaw..."

I sighed, "I'm fine, mother."

Beestripe startled, as if surprised, then shook her head, "Yes, of course you are. But Honeypaw! Mistystar declared that you, Stonepaw and Berrypaw should begin their warrior ceremony."

I stared at her, dumbfound, as I realised that those were tears of pride, and her whiskers were shaking from happiness. Then, I looked to Cloudypaw, who gazed back blankly, emotionlessly.

My heart dropped. 

Couldn't she at least feel happy for me? 

A surge of anger started to rise inside of me. 

She deserved it. 

Cloudypaw deserved to have her full name ceremony delayed. This is what she gets for becoming a medicine cat at the last minute. This is what she gets for leaving me and Stonepaw.

Somewhere deep inside of me, where my standards weren't so low, I was disappointed that my mother hadn't cared whether I was fine or not. All she cared about was that my rank had moved up. Instead of acknowledging this, I encouraged myself to think about all the benefits of being a warrior. 

I would get to lead patrols and mentor apprentices! 

And Berrypaw ...maybe Berrypaw would talk to me again when he realised that I was a warrior just like him. My heart jumped into my throat and I finally realised the full extent of my love for him.

I turned to my mother with renewed energy, "Really? When?"

Beestripe turned to exit the den, "Right now!"

I jumped up and nearly collapsed again as I felt my muscles burn and snap. 

Cloudypaw rushed over, and spread a leafy paste over one of my wounds, securing it tightly with another cobweb, "Hold right there! I'm nearly done. When Tropicpalm is better, I'll get her to check it."

At her touch, I felt a renewed jab of pain at my heart that cleared as I realised, "Tropicpalm?"

My sister rolled her eyes, "Yeah, did you forget her as well?"

Brushing away my hurt at her snide comment, I refocused my confusion, "I thought.... that she was dead...."

Cloudypaw finally looked at me directly, reproach spiking her fur. I pursed my mouth, preparing for a shout of anger and disbelief. 

Instead, her eyes softened and she mewed gently, "Aw, no, Honeypaw. Tropicpalm's perfectly fine. She's just.. her leg ..."

I raised a paw to urgently stop her, "I know! I know. I don't need to ... ugh..."

Snapping my eyes closed, all I could see was the white of her bone... the tearing of her flesh....., I opened my eyes. There, in the corner right behind my sister, was a lump of fur that rose and dipped steadily. Several pieces of prey were placed beside her, half-eaten and discarded. A few stale leafy pulps were smeared on a stub that was in place of her left hind leg. 

I couldn't take this anymore. 

Cloudypaw had never done anything but hurt me! 

Why should I put up with her another second if I could go be a warrior instead? 

Turning away from her pitying gaze, I shouldered my way out, having no intention to head back in ever again.