All of the tips of my fingers have calluses, (little pieces of hard skin) AND IT HURTS LIKE HELL TO DRAW BUT I DO IT ANYWAYS BECAUSE I LOVE TO

And in top of stabbing my fingers, I pick at hangnails, causing painful scabs and exposed skin. I don't mean to, but it's out of habit.

It hurts.

My legs are sore from walking around my school.

I have mini bruises all over from shots.

I am constantly tired.

And when I'm tired, I'm annoyed easily.

And I fucking have classes with jerks who ditched me with popular dicks and when we do fucking icebreakers they say "what was your name again?" LIKE SHE'D FUCKING FORGET

AND SOMEONE LAST YEAR TOLD ME TO KILL MYSELF AND HES IN MY BIOLOGY CAN HE GO SUCK A DICK

AND SOMEONE WHO WANTS TO RAPE ME KNOWS WHERE I LIVE AND WHENEVER I SEE HIM HE LOOKS RIGHT IN MY EYES

And I want to cry

I want to be popular.

I want to have nothing to do, nothing on my shoulders.

my childhood best friend doesn't remember me, but that's okay because she's obviously popular, wearing foundation, mascara, concealer, highlighter, bronzer

And I'm over here, acne-ridden knowing almost everyone in the classroom.

But they all hate me

That's why I'm depressed

That's why I fucking suck.

I might not be cheered up easily, I'm in ninth grade.

People have picked on me, bullied me, harassed my friends.

So I'm ready to yell at them, swear at them.

Shout:

"WHAT DID I DO WRONG THAT FIRST DAY OF SIXTH GRADE?"

Because if someone even teases me one more time,

I'll get my pterodactyl brigade and take them down

But

That doesn't stop me hurting myself.

With my condition I'll be stabbing myself until I die.

(Most of why I suck)

NO ONE UNDERSTANDS

EVERYONE SAYS "you get it if you're fat."

I WEIGH 96 LBS!

IM TINY

AND I WANT TO SCREAM AND CRY

I DONT WANT THIS

but I'll have it all my merry fucking life

Goodbye.