≫ Chapter 26 ≪

Sugawara

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It could have been anyone, really.

Anything, whether it'd be legendary or plain horrific, could happen to anybody. And it could be etched permanently and vividly, never to be forgotten.

When I was nine, my family and I visited the beach in an attempt to cool off our scorching bodies and regulate our body temperature from seemingly-feverish to normal. We booked a stay in a comfortable cottage, and after we put our bags down there, my dad immediately took his shirt off and headed for the sea with no words.

My mother, being herself, helped me put on sunblock in fear that if I didn't, my pale skin would be so burnt and painful that I might've needed to go to the hospital. When I remember this, I am gently and amusingly reminded of who I had inherited my tender nature from.

After rubbing on at least three layers of sunblock on my skin, my mom slipped on a rash guard and swim trunks on me, handing me my goggles afterward. She attempted to put on a swim cap on me too, but I had always disliked the silicone "head cages" squeezing my skull and would refuse to wear it with all my heart.

Finally, when my mother was satisfied and sure that I'd be alright, she put her sun hat on, took my hand, and walked with me to the beach. Those big floppy hats, she told me on the way there, were to protect her face from the unmerciful UV rays. I told her that it was I liked her sun hat, that I didn't want her pretty face to end up burnt either. A son never forgets his mother's laugh, and to this day, I still remember her cheerful giggles and how they made me smile, too.

She laid down a towel on the soft sand, telling me that I was free to go and swim, for as long as I never went beyond knee-level. With glee and excitement, I waded into the water where my dad was, happy to be engulfed by the smell of salt and the seawaters.

I let my nine-year-old self float gently on the water, letting every part of me embrace the sea with no fear and no worries. The sun was shining powerfully on my face, but my liquid friend kept me as cool as I pleased. I thought about how fascinating it was to be floating, that it was amazing how the tiniest specks of salt were keeping my body from sinking. Tiny atoms were keeping billions of sea creatures alive. Whoever must have created the sea was immensely amazing.

I still clearly remember that I had been too awe-struck by the ocean's scientific trivia that I didn't notice I had been slowly drifting away from shore. When I decided to stand up again, my stomach did a whole three-sixty when I discovered that my feet could not feel any sand underneath. My eyes shot towards the beach, horrified to discover that it was too far. However distant I was from it, I attempted to remain calm and tried to freestyle my way back. I did it for a good number of minutes, but with every stroke, my tiny arms felt a little heavier, as if an invisible hand was slowly sweeping me further into the deep.

When you're a little kid who has tried to remain calm and do the most humane thing but still hasn't succeeded in returning to safety, your mind goes terrifyingly blank. The only thing your mind can do is tell you to yell as loud as your little lungs will let you and panic because who knows what creatures lay in the deep waiting to grab your little legs and eat you for good.

I heard my mother and father's faint screams as they shrieked at lifeguards to please save their little Koushi from drowning. As soon as the word drowning entered my ears, tears started streaming uncontrollably down my salt-stained cheeks, terrifying my poor self even more.

It must have been two minutes of crazy wailing and flailing about when my an unspeakable pain shot through my left leg. Cramps were starting to surge through my foot, striking my heart with such fear that I used up every ounce of energy in my tiny body to try and just float once more, hoping that someone, anyone, would pick me up and bring me back to the comforts of land.

Before my right leg started to cramp, someone picked me up and threw me onto a small canoe, saving both my life and my sanity. I must have fainted from exhaustion then, because the next thing I remember was waking up on the cottage bed, pleading my mom to give whoever saved me my favorite necklace as a reward, a silver music note hanging on a thin, silver chain.

It could have easily been anyone who was caught in the riptide on that beach that day, but no.

It was me.

Perhaps, to this day, that near-death experience still remains as my worst memory; maybe that and the memory of breaking my best friend's hands.

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Hamako-sensei was discussing something about economics, but let me tell you that trying to figure out the relevance of 'elasticity' in a lecture was excruciatingly difficult with terrifying chills being sent down your spine every ten seconds.

My head turned to my right the slightest bit, and in my peripheral vision, Ezakiya-san and Ishinomori-san glared at me with eyes that wanted me to drop dead. I jerked my head away as quick as I could.

Kowai.

Ah, Ayumu must have told them. Perhaps now, everyone knew that I, the usually-chivalrous Sugawara, had stood up Class 3-1's favorite girl. However bad a person I must have been depicted as, I was concerned not for me, but for her. She really must have felt terrible.

I sucked in my breath and turned my head to the other side, my eyes trailing off to the mousse-haired female sitting only two rows behind me, near the shelves.

Her eyes were stuck in a cycle of looking at the board, shifting her gaze to her notebook, and then writing something down. Ah, so she was paying attention to the lecture.

My thoughts were interrupted by a gentle poke on my shoulder coming from none other than Daichi, who mouthed for me to listen to what Hamako-sensei was saying. I nodded sheepishly, slightly embarrassed to have been caught.

My back straightened up a little more, and my eyes attempted to focus on the board. Notes on supply and demand were printed in white chalk, important terms in blue. I picked up my trusty blue mechanical pencil and started to jot down the notes as quickly as I could, trying to win the race between my hand and Hamako-sensei's teaching. She erased the board. I'm screwed.

Was that my punishment for thinking of Ayumu too much during class?

I stopped. Then lit up.

If I forgot to take down notes because of her, that makes her responsible. Which means that she would have no right to refuse my simple request.

I grinned.

"Sugawara-san, tell me what happens if the price of oil drops now," Hamako-sensei perked up, putting my Ayumu-related thoughts at a halt.

I looked up at the board, then at my notes. I searched and scanned for answers in every line, but I couldn't find anything.

Panic.

"Sugawara-san?"

I stood up hastily. "It means the demand for rice is low?"

She stood still for a minute, the whole class hushed. Before she spoke again, she looked at me with a grin. "You're telling me, Sugawara," she smiled, "that when the price of oil drops, it indicates that the demand for rice is low. Ah, is that it? As expected from one of my top students! Take your seat."

Did Sensei know about my wrongdoings? No, Ayumu wouldn't tell her. Not with all the teasing about us two. The world simply must not have been on my side today.

"Hikari-san. Answer?"

Good game. I'm done.

"It depends on both the importing and exporting countries. It can be favoring for the countries that depend on oil importation and devastating for those dependent on oil exportation," she answered, standing up.

"Now there's the answer I needed. Sit down, Hikari," Sensei instructed, "that's about it for today's class, so please don't forget to give me the essay I asked for yesterday tomorrow."

Sensei's eyes were judging me, and they were judging me hard. At least I finished my essay and turned it in early! In the background, a chorus of groans was heard from the lazy ones who were doomed because they hadn't started. Scolds for procrastinating followed shortly after.

"Ah! Before you guys leave, I have an announcement regarding your field trip. For the last field trip of your Karasuno experience, we'll be going to Hokkaido as a class! Further details will be announced during homeroom tomorrow, so please finish up all your assignments from your respective subject teachers so that you kids don't have to cram after the trip. I've been there, you guys. I'm telling you. Don't cram," Sensei announced cheerfully, earning the attention of the class as she always did. "It's going to be real fun, I assure you. It's a three-day thing, and if you kids are good, I'll let you choose your roommates. And yes, boys. You're still separated from the girls."

She eyed a few students.

"Well, I won't keep you guys here any longer. Have a good lunch, you guys."

That was the signal. I threw my pencil and eraser in my pouch, then proceeded to toss everything else into my bag. There was no time to be wasted. As quickly as humanly possible, I turned around and headed towards Ayumu, determined to set things straight.

"Hikar-"

Before I could say the last letter of that name, Ezakiya-san grabbed hold of Ayumu's arm, turning to me with her tongue sticking out. With speed, Ishinomori-san held the other arm, ushering the girl I needed out the door. And just like that, I was left standing idly and Ayumu-less, chained by the fact that I couldn't do anything but look at the question of my own failure.

A hand was placed on my shoulder.

"Fighting with your girlfriend, huh, Sugawara-san?" Hamako-sensei echoed in my ear, watching with me as the three left the classroom.

"No!" I denied, louder than I should have. "She's not my girlfriend!"

"Go on ahead, Sawamura. I need to talk with this friend of yours," she instructed, gesturing for Daichi to leave. Oh yeah, he was waiting for me. With respect, he bowed and left quickly. Gomen, Daichi.

"Talk?" I questioned, eyeing her carefully.

"Yes. Clearly, you're troubled. You haven't been listening at all to the lecture, and when it was done, you went immediately to her," Hamako-sensei pointed out, sitting down on one of the seats. "Is it her? Or am I wrong?"

"Sumimasen, Sensei. But I have a strong feeling that you're going to just tease us in some way. We're really not like that. It would have been monumental if she even considered us friends," I told her.

Sensei sighed with a smile. "I understand it if you want to be private about it. That is totally acceptable. However, as a teacher, I must address things concerning the development and learning of my students. If anything should be hindering my kids from learning, I need to help them. That's my job," she explained, "but in the very likely case that you're in a mess because you and Hikari had some sort of disagreement, I suggest you let her be. Maybe she needs a little time. After all, if you were really friends, she'd forgive you."

Sensei fiddled with her ring, which was a rich shade of gold. Rumor had it that someone gave it to her when she was still studying in the very school we were standing in.

I shifted my gaze from her hands to her eyes. "Pardon me for asking, but where'd you get that ring?"

Her lips turned upwards and her face suddenly emitted a new sense of glee, as if someone had turned on a lamp inside of her. "That's a story for another day, my dear student. More importantly, you need to mend things up with your friend before things get more complicated."

"But that's the thing, Sensei. Maybe we were never friends and I just thought too high of myself. Maybe we were just destined to hate each other."

"If you were destined to hate each other," she began, "why do you care so much?"

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It was clear that Daichi was desperate to know what the talk with Sensei was all about. While changing for volleyball practice, he and Asahi were bombarding me with all sorts of questions, their voices much louder than they needed to be.

In fact, their voices were so loud, Hinata burst into the room asking about it, too. With irritation, I asked them to please stop worrying about me and focus on volleyball, which they really should have been doing because we had matches to play. There was no space for my personal problems during practice.

When Daichi slid the gym door open, it was evident that he, along with the others, was shocked at the sight of three people who weren't Hinata nor Kageyama practicing.

The sound of a successful spike echoed throughout the court, squeaks of shoes complementing it.

"Ah, that was really good, Tadashi! It's a shame Kei couldn't keep up with it!" Ayumu laughed, high-fiving Yamaguchi's sweaty, red hands.

"Arigato, Ayu-chan! Why don't you try setting for me this time– ah..." Yamaguchi answered, voice trailing off as he turned towards the entrance Daichi had just opened.

Tsukishima had jerked his head towards the back exit, eyes meeting Ayumu's. Ah, I needed to seize the opportunity before it slipped my hands.

"Ayu–Hikari! Chotto matte!" I waved, jogging towards her.

Tsukishima interrupted my walking, towering over me with a piercing glare. "Don't follow her, you jerk."

With a frown, Daichi interrupted, "Oi, Tsukishima. Don't talk to your senpai like that."

From behind the irritatingly altitudious first-year came Ayumu's voice, so normal that it came as a surprise. "Gomen, Sawamura-san. Kei's always rude like this. It's in his nature, so please excuse this naturally-mean kid."

"Urusai, you naturally-annoying stick."

"If anyone's the stick here, it's you, Everest. Or do you still like the name 'Fuji'?" she retorted, removing the ponytail that was keeping her hair up.

Even if I wanted to tell her that whatever, she looked pretty nice with her hair up, she was going get away if I didn't do something to fix the dilemma we were currently in. With haste, I seized her wrist. Hinata gasped and Asahi hid behind him, legs wobbly. It seemed that they were both more terrified for me than I was for myself, giving me a strange boost of confidence.

"We need to talk."

She looked down at my hand, smiling softly as she gently placed her hand on my own wrist.

"Sorry. I'm not the Hikari you want to talk to," she said, violently shoving my arm away. "I understand. It has been some time since your little rendezvous with my sister, my dude. I'll tell her you miss her. Ah, another one of the favors you owe me. Don't touch my hands or my wrist ever again."

I flinched.

She took a glance at her wristwatch. "I gotta run, though. Prez is going to kill me if I'm not in the club room in 5 minutes. Good luck to you all, practice hard! Especially you, Kei. Jaa mata ne!"

With a wave, she set off, running out the main entrance like I'd never hurt her in the first place. And just like that, I was left standing idly and Ayumu-less once again, except that now, I knew for sure the pain she felt was stained all over her.

It wasn't the first time I had trampled all over her heart, and it wasn't the first time I regretted it either.

People praised me for being intelligent, but that was nothing but a facade. If I was really intelligent, I'd have known to make better decisions. I'd have given Ayumu the care she deserved.

"You're not even going to run after her?" Yamaguchi asked, tone filled with clear disappointment. "I never knew you were filled with such cowardice, Sugawara-senpai."

How could I? She was the shore, and I was caught in a rip tide. Further and further it led me away from her, no matter how hard I tried to swim back.

I felt that if I tried to do anything more, I would drown.

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a/n: this is a suPER IMPORTANT FILLER CHAPTER

yeS THIS IS A FILLER CHAPTER,, buT IT's reALLLY IMPORTANT

LITTLE THINGS. IT's the litTLE THINGS THAT MAKE THE BIGGER THINGS MORE SPLENDID.

i revised this chapter like so many times o my gudness you dont even know

also u have every right to be mad at suga <<33

cryin tho it's a 2750+ word filler

that's how impt it is

happy monday, my dudes.

ALSO THANKS FOR 44k reaDS I'm sO touCHED??? like thaNK YOU FOR SUPPORTING THIS BOOK, which is my chILD and oFFSPRING

THANK YOU FOR YOUR COMMENTS !! your comments always make me laugh,, i promise there was this one time i really wasn't supposed to be laughing and i ended up crying in front of my dad

i <<33 you guys !! thank you sosososo much for your support, im rlly grateful !!

jaa ne,

cerys