Carolyn in the media.

Monogamy or whatever you call it
I'm starting to think it ain't for everybody. - Wale

LAYLANI

"Momma, I love him, can't we just end it?" I sob on her chest. I can't stop crying my heart out. It's been a week and each day gets harder without him. We made a bond that I never thought could break and the only reason I lost the only boy I've ever planned on loving is because my mom is too scared to be real with her sister. I love Reshawd but I couldn't just turn and go against my mother like that, I'm way too loyal. It hurts so bad because I've never lied to him until then. She smacks her lips. "He trusted me. He never lied to me." I say. She chuckles. "You sure bout that? I can guarentee you ain't the only one keeping secrets. Stay away from that boy, let him go. He ain't good enough for you." she says. "You don't even know him." I mumble. "He ever told you how he living in that big ass house?" she asks. I shake my head no. "My point exactly. It's a cold ass world. His secret does more damage than yours ever will, trust me. That's how I got in this situation in the first place. You better listen and away while it's still early cause once you in, ain't no getting out. My sister is living proof." she says.

I shake my head, walking out. What does that even mean? I know Reshawd's step mom never looks happy and she has a few scars, but I don't see what she means. His dad is nice but scary as fuck and all of his brothers and sisters are kinda crazy but I like them, I don't see my mom's point at all.

I go to my room then pull my phone out. I take a deep breath then begin typing Reshawd's name in the Google search engine. His entire name pops up. I click on it then scroll through everything in pure shock. His dad is a serial killer and notorious drug lord and his mom is his right hand. My eyes tear up as I read the truth about him and his family.

"Reshawd Crippen, one of the youngest sons of Savage Princess and Prod arrested for assault with a deadly weapon. The ten year old was reportedly told by his elementary school teacher to wake up and read his spelling words, which he responded to with a smart remark that made his teacher, Mr. Jones angry. Jones reportedly yelled at Reshawd. Reshawd was seen on camera pulling a silver baseball bat wrapped with barbwire out of a duffel bag which he nearly beat his teacher to death with, then spit on and repeatedly stomped on Mr. Jones until he was no longer breathing." I read

I gasp then cover my mouth, reading all of the news reports from the violent things he was arrested for when he was younger. "So, this why he can't go to school. He has no people skills." I mumble. It's all coming together. His parents know he's not stable enough to be around authority figures other than them without doing something crazy. Reshawd's arrest history is extra long and it's seriously only violent crimes that happened at school.

I dial his number, hoping he answers. He let it ring four times then ignored it so I know he saw it. I call Ryshawn. "Sup?" he answers. "Where is Reshawd?" I ask. I hear whispering in the background. "Nigga, what?" he yells at somebody. "Oh, my bad, Laylani. He with his girlfriend." he awkwardly says. "Girlfriend? That bitch better be able to swim with sharks with a bloody tampon on and still survive if she better than me! Nobody is better for him than me!" I snap.

I didn't even mean to say that. It was just my anger and frustration. He is being so irrational. He laughs then whispers something. "He told me she better than you. She a darkskinned girl." he says. I hear a loud thud in the background. "Oh, shit, my bad, stop!" he yells, then whispers something.

"He wanna know why you keep calling and texting his uncivilized ass." he says. I sigh. "Is she prettier?" I mumble, hearing him and a female talking in the back ground. "No, she fat as hell with no neck and she thirty something. My dad and step mom don't even know, we ain't at the house tonight. But this fat ass hoe look like Big Shirley off Martin, grease stain smelling ass!" he snaps.

I bust out laughing. "Well, she can have him then. No point in chasing somebody who will never feel the same." I say. He smacks his lips. "Even though I personally like you a lot, I can tell you will always have a soft spot for my brother. My dad explained it to me. So, with that being said, don't let this cougar hoe win so easily. I'm gone come pick you up, get dressed." he says. "It's late and I can't keep sneaking
out." I say. "Dude, come on, I'm on my way now, be ready." he says then hangs up.

I sigh then walk to my closet. I grab a pair of pink and black Nike joggers and the matching shirt that Reshawd bought for me online because it isn't sold here in Jamaica.

I grab a pair of custom painted black and pink high top air force ones then put them on. I get dressed then walk into the bathroom. I unwrap my hair then comb my freshly flat ironed hair that falls to the middle of my back. I brush my teeth then put on some mascara and eyeliner, then my lip gloss. I put my diamond stud earrings in my ears then spray myself with my Rihanna perfume that my dad bought for me.

I check my phone then sneak down the stairs. I walk out the back door then to the front and get in Nugget's car. He nods his head at me. "Dang, it seems like you have a new car every week." I say, admiring the cocaine white Aston Martin. "It's my step mom's, she said I could borrow it to take my little sisters to the beach but she didn't ask for the key yet " he says.

"Dang, you got it made." I say. "Not really, I live in a house full of emotionally unstable psycho people who go crazy without taking their meds. I love em though." he says, making me laugh.

He pulls off with Connect by Drake playing low. "Can I ask you something?" I ask. He nods his head. "What made Reshawd so aggressive and crazy?" I ask. "He ain't crazy. Don't call him that to his face, he'll snap, just a warning. But he been through a whole lot." he answers, looking like he hiding something. "Like? I think I can help him through his problems." I say. "It ain't my place to put his business out, but the beginning of his life was rough while my dad was in jail. That's all I can tell you." he says

I nod my head, understanding. If Shawd wanted me to know, he would've told me. He drives to the beach then parks. "You American bwoys love the beach, huh?" I ask. He chuckles. "It's calming." he answers.

We walk in the sand. I spot Reshawd sitting on a lawn chair with a big woman on his lap. Nugget was wrong, she is beautiful to me. Just because she's big doesn't make her less attractive than a thinner woman. I can't lie though, it looks like she's about to break his legs and the lawn chair right along with em.

I shake my head then walk past them. I take my shirt and pants off, leaving me in my bikini I wore just in case. I sit in the sand with my feet in the water. I can literally feel eyes on me. I look back at Reshawd while he stares at me without even trying to hide it. I roll my eyes at him.

I feel somebody next to me. "What you want, Reshawd?" I ask without looking. "Who?" a guy asks, laughing. I glance at him. He is so fine. He's caramel with light brown eyes and long dreads with a grill in his mouth. "Laylani." I introduce myself. He kisses. "Tevin." he says, looking in my eyes.

If I was a couple of shades lighter, my face would've been extremely red from blushing by now. He chuckles. "You don't sound Jamaican, where you from?" I ask. "Florida. I love your accent, ma." he says. "Thank you. Yours is cool too. I like American bwoys." I say, laughing a little. He chuckles. "Will you dance with one?" he asks, going through the music on his phone. I stand. "You ever danced with an island gyal before?" I ask. He shakes his head no, chuckling. "Nah, be my first." he says, grabbing my hand as a song Reshawd really likes called Milk Marie starts playing.

I grab his arms and wrap them around my waist, winding on him. He finally catches on then moves to the rhythm with me. "Damn." he grunts. I can feel him hardening on me.

"Put me down!" I scream at Reshawd, punching his back. He just snatched me and Tevin apart out of nowhere and threw me over his shoulder. "You got me fucked up right now grinding all on this young nigga." he lowly growls at me.

I notice Nugget dap Tevin up and say thank you. I should kill him for setting that up, he knew Shawd would react like that.

"Make up your mind, Reshawd!" I scream at him. "My mind is made up, I don't want you but none of these niggas can have you! Think I'm playing and see what happens!" he snaps, squeezing my arm. "Let me go! You sound dumb and possessive!" I scream, finally seeing what my mom meant when she said there's no turning back once you're in. His dad is exactly like he is. It's clear that his dad has mind control over his mom and he's trying to do the same with me.

"Get off of me! You are crazy, bwoy, don't you ever touch me or talk to me again, I am not about to turn into your mother!" I scream, then slap him, instantly regretting it.

I was just talking out the side of my neck, I didn't mean to say that to him. He slaps the shit out of me, shocking me for some reason. "Learn some self control!" he yells at me. I start wildly punching him but he's literally eating all my punches, making me feel weak. "No nigga will ever hit me!" I scream at him as tears roll down my face. He gets closer. "Didn't mean to hit you, I don't fight women. Get out my face before I say something I'll regret." he calmly says. I push his forehead. "Fuck you, I hope you die in a painful way!" I scream, then storm away. I refuse to take his disrespect.

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