Quick update:
*Please watch a few seconds of the videos if you can. I put them there for a reason, just so a few seconds of their entrance music can play and because the music kinda adds the authentic feeling to it. Thank you, and enjoy the rumble!*

Before we get to the rumble, we cut to a backstage promo. On the screen was The Miz.

"Wow. What a shame. Ronda Rousey's big return, spoiled by some Jersey-Shore wannabe. Y'know, that's almost as Tragic as the Fact that The Most Must See WWE superstar has to pull himself from the rumble this year. I was due to enter 6th, but as you know, Last year at Backlash, I threw out my knee and rushed the recovery, so now I'm out of the Rumble. I'm told they picked an ample replacement for me, but I doubt they can ever amount to MY greatness. Rumor has it, this 'Worthy replacement' is entering 7th instead of 6th. I doubt he'll even last 10 seconds..."

Then the screen cuts to the outside. The winner of the NXT Battle Royale to get in the rumble match, Adam Cole, was stopped by a reporter.
"Adam! How do you think you'll fair in the rumble tonight?"

"Well, It's easy. If it's number 1 or number 40, my money's on me, ADAM COLE, BAY-BAY!! I've been waiting for another shot at this match and I'll be damned if I don't wi-" He was cut off by a chair shot to the back, then about 4 more shots. The attacker's identity was not seen.

5th match:
Drew McIntyre vs Bobby Lashley (c) under Falls Count Anywhere rules for WWE Championship

Result:
It was a tough, Gruelling match that began in the ring, went up the ramp, backstage, into a parking lot, Off a Truck, Through a total of 9 tables, and in the end, it ended in the crowd following a Claymore to Lashley, who was going for one final Spear onto the concrete. McIntyre crawled into the cover, 1 2 3, and just Like that, Drew McIntyre is a 3 time WWE Champion!

6th match:
Roman Reigns vs Cesaro (c) inside A Steel Cage for the Universal Championship

Result:
This match was the very definition of "Clash of the titans". Roman used about 6 Superman Punches and 3 spears, but Cesaro hit probably like 15 European Uppercuts, including one off a Middle Rope Spear attempt. Reigns was going for that third Spear, but then Cesaro Sidestepped, and Reigns crashed shoulder first into the cage wall, which didn't break and hurt like hell for the Challenger. Cesaro called for the cage door and crawled to the outside to retain his Universal title, much to the approval of the WWE Universe.

Main Event:

*Ding ding ding!*

"Ladies and Gentlemen and all other Facebook genders I cannot list off or else we'd be here forever... it is now time for the Men's Royal Rumble Match!!! Competitors will enter every 90 seconds or so, and Competitors will be eliminated when both feet touch the floor after being thrown over the top rope. There will be 40 Entrants this year instead of 30, So we will start the Rumble off with the first 3 entrants, and then everyone entering after them. Without further ado, the Competitor who drew number one..."

"The Ayatolla of Rock 'n' Rolla, The Legendary Y-2-J, Chris Jericho! The man with the most time spent in a match in Rumble History! And who's gonna be number 2?" -Cole

"It's the Celtic Warrior, Sheamus! Remember, these two were the final competitors in the 2012 Rumble that took place 10 years ago to the day. And now we See who the 3rd entry is!"

The Music man came out with guitar in hand. "Hello, I am Elias!" Guitar playing followed.

However, The two in the ring had something to say about that. "Hey Fella, how bout ye shut yer mouth and come fight me. I ain't Got'll night!"

Elias wasn't really paying attention. He began playing and continuing his promo.

"Sheamus, You're an Irish Bastard
Lad, go back to your whisky and gin!
He thinks he'll Prevail in this rumble
But this ginger just won't win!"

Now Jericho had enough. "How about you shut your damn mouth before I shove my fist down it?!"

Elias shifted his focus to Chris.
"Who's the old fart in the ring?
Please tell me He ain't your pick!..."

Elias slid in the ring, then resumed the guitar.

"It's just a shame that he runs away...
To a Rival brand? What a prick!
It's too bad, but he gotta Nice fat check!
I guess It's compensating... for his tiny di-"

At that point, Jericho whacked Elias with the Microphone, and The Bell sounded, Starting the Royal Rumble Match! Sheamus pulls Jericho off Elias, And Sheamus now stomping a hole through the Drifter! Jericho, Now letting Sheamus do this, as he does his signature "Drink it in, Maaaaaaan!" Pose... and gets Brogue Kicked upon turning around.

"I dunno why he does that. He gets *Dolphin Noise*'d every time he turns around after doing that!" -Our favorite Former NFL Player turned Legendary Commentator, Pat McAfee.

"Meanwhile, this year for the Rumble in Chicago we're joined on Commentary by The One and Only Phil Brooks, Known to all of you as CM Punk! Punk, Welcome Back to the WWE! How does it feel to be back?" -cole

"Honestly, I didn't miss it. I mean, Hell yeah, Vince is gone and this company finally got off its Ass and became Watchable again. And honestly, I'm only Here cuz they offered AJ the spot to return and I had no other plans for tonight."

Meanwhile, Elias was just getting Wrecked until the timer counted down.

10...9...8...7...6...5...4...3...2...1... *Buzzer*

"Dolph Ziggler, Entering his 15th Rumble Match in a row, most among active WWE Superstars." -Graves

Ziggler hits a Dropkick on Sheamus, then A Zig Zag on Elias. Jericho stopped the Show Off's Momentum with a Forearm to the back of the head. Elias got back into the match and tried a Guitar Smash on Jericho, but Y2J ducks under, Kick to the gut, DDT by Jericho! And this Crowd, getting behind Jericho, chanting "Y2J", then singing "Judas" during the Fighting portions. This caused all four competitors to stop and look around. Jericho couldn't help but smile, Elias smirked, Dolph Lip synced along because he was just having fun which accidentally turned him Babyface, and Sheamus looked like he just angrily shat his pants because he didn't like it.

Soon, the Clock ticked down.

10...9...8...7...6...5...4...3...2...1... *Buzzer*

And which member is it?

It's Xavier Woods! Woods to ringside, Playing along with the fans' singing of Judas on his Trombone. Truly, This is the best Multi-Character break (minus Sheamus) in history.

Woods sets the Trombone down and enters the match. He starts off fighting Dolph, Then moving to Elias, before dodging a Clothesline by Sheamus and connecting with an Arm Drag to the Celtic Warrior!

Meanwhile, Jericho hits a Lionsault on Elias. Dolph Superkicks Woods after the Arm Drag, and Ziggler shouts "THIS TIME! IT WILL BE ME!" And Jericho taps him on the shoulder and says "I'll never be You!" And hits him with a Codebreaker.

10...9...8...7...6...5...4...3...2...1... *Buzzer*

"And the Modern Day Maharaja is about to join the rumble! Jinder once declared, in 2013, that a member of 3MB would win the Royal Rumble. Well, Turns out, He wasn't wrong, Just off by about 7 years, because in 2020, 3MB member Drew McIntyre won the rumble. Ever since then, Mahal's been thinking he's a Prohpet who gets these futuristic visions." -Cole

"Which is a load of Horse Crap." -Pat.

"Which I embrace! The Maharaja's teaching isn't for the Weak of faith, you gotta understand, this man predicted the future!"

"It's a Shitty Gimmick at best. He's tryna reicve that embarrassment he calls a career." -Punk

Mahal had a Mic. "AH, What a good night to be The Modern Day Maharaja! I am The Prophet, listen to my teaching: Tonight, Jinder Mahal will win the Royal Rumble. Tonight, I will earn the right to face Whomever I choose at Wrestlemania! Tonight! I shall ignite my Resurgence as THE top performer in this company!..."

But he was being so heavily boo'ed that no one really cared what he was saying.

By the time Mahal got into the ring and executed A Backbreaker on Woods and a Gut check on Ziggler. Mahal Poses on the middle rope.

And due to mahal's long speech, the timer was already Running down.

10...9...8...7...6...5...4...3...2...1... *Buzzer*

"OH MY GOD! THE YES MAN! THE YES MAN! HE'S BACK! HE'S BACK!" -Cole

"YES! YES! YES!" -Pat

"No!" -Corey

"Meh. I don't really care. I'm hungry, so I'm gonna order something. You guys want any?" -Punk

"YES!" -Pat

"I'll have em sent out with one of the entrants."

Bryan into the ring, Immediately delivering the Yes Kicks to Elias! Mahal, tries charging Bryan, Daniel Dodges, Running Knee to Mahal, Over the top and to the floor, Bryan Eliminates Jinder Mahal!

Now Elias trying for the guitar shot, Misses, Ziggler Superkick through the Guitar, Bryan grabs hold of Elias, Tosses him over, To the floor. Credit Ziggler with the assist on that One!

Bryan scoring the first two Eliminations of this rumble match, and that's 7 entries entered, 2 eliminated, and 33 to go! Who will enter at #8?

10...9...8...7...6...5...4...3...2...1... *Buzzer*

And it's the Former North American Champion, Johnny Gargano!

Gargano joins the fray! Gargano goes for a Superkick on Dolph, Blocked, Ziggler goes for the Zig Zag, Gargano countered Into a Lawn Dart into the Turnbuckle! Ouch! That's gotta hurt...

Meanwhile Sheamus goes for White Noise on Jericho, Y2J fights out of this one, And goes for the step-Through Neckbreaker but Sheamus able to slip out of Jericho's reach. The celtic Warrior goes for a Brogue Kick, Misses, but Gargano hits a Superkick on Sheamus! Walked Right into it!

And Now it's Jericho with the Codebreaker to Ziggler as Woods Rests under the bottom rope.

10...9...8...7...6...5...4...3...2...1... *Buzzer*

And Jey Uso Will now Enter! Looking to Become a champion, looking to Revive his family's pride after His Cousin Roman Reigns dropped the title to Cesaro!

And now Uso going right after Jericho, Who had some rather insulting remarks for Reigns before Revealing the New List of Jericho and adding Reigns and Heyman to it.

Uso with a Kick to the midsection, Goes for an Enziguri, Blocked By Jericho, and What a right Forearm by Jericho! Now Uso staggered, and Jericho looks for a Codebreaker, No, y2j intercepted by the Kick from Daniel Bryan! Now Woods with the Honor Roll to Ziggler, who just rolled back into the ring!

And time is flying by, who will be Number 10

And it's Big E! An elated look on the face of Xavier Woods, as his former New Day Brethren will join him in this rumble match!

Big E runs to ringside with a plate full of Pancakes and sets them on the Table in front of Punk. "What, no Syrup?" E shrugged. "So uncivilized..." Punk sighed as he began eating, And Pat stole one.

Now it's Woods and E Teeing off on Gargano and Ziggler! Ziggler is down, now Woods joins E and Gargano is getting Pummeled while Jericho and Ziggler rest under the bottom rope, and Bryan is taking the fight to Sheamus!

And Uso from behind, the kick to Woods, Uso now Has a hold of Woods, throws him over the top, Eliminated!

Uso celebrating his Elimination, Right in Woods' face. "Yeah, tha's right! You ain't nothin, Uce! Nothin!"

"Uh oh... dont turn around, Jey..." -Graves

Jey turned and saw a Severely Pissed off Big E. "...My bad, Uce..." But there's no apologizing. It's a Royal Rumble! Big E Picked up Uso like a ragdoll and nearly tossed him into the Front row!

After E eliminated Uso, the people in the crowd could hear Big E yell "FEEL THAT POWER, B*TCH!"

Jericho. Sheamus. Ziggler. Bryan. Gargano. Big E. Ten have entered! Thirty More will enter. 6 stand at the end of part one. Will The Yes man outlast them all? Will we feel the power of Big E? Or will we all become Judas in our minds as the Legendary Y2J puts on another iron man performance? Find out in parts 2, 3 & 4... but mostly 2 because that's how writing in Parts works.

Eliminations this chapter:
Jinder Mahal by Daniel Bryan
Elias by Daniel Bryan (2)
Xavier Woods by Jey Uso
Jey Uso by Big E