Roman POV: 

Late one night, I found myself unable to sleep. Lying on my back in my bed, I stared at my ceiling and let my thoughts wander. 

The very first thought my mind came to was the last Sanders Sides video, seeing as we just finished recording it the previous afternoon. 

When Thomas first told me that he was going to publish a video near Christmas, I instantly started thinking of things we could do that revolve around Christmas and the holidays. And I had a perfect idea that I was sure all the fans would love. 

When Thomas heard my idea, he loved it, along with both Patton and Logan. We were all set to do it, and I couldn't wait. 

But noooo... As soon as he heard about the video, Virgil popped up and demanded to do something about Halloween. Thankfully, all of our costumes from the actual holiday were still intact, so we were able to quickly put them on. 

Now that I thought about it, Virgil's idea to do a Halloween video was quite... creative. It was unique, and his attempt to scare us, though unfruitful, was clever. I knew he was trying to be intimidating and scary, but, if anything, it was endearing to see him try so hard. 

And I have to give it to him; his makeup was incredible. It must have taken him hours to get it right. 

But, if I'm honest, I think the makeup was a little too much. And so was the costume. I much preferred his regular outfit. It just seemed to fit who he was better, plus, he looked better in it. 

He was so much more confident during the video, and it just didn't seem right. He's always been more comfortable being in the shadows, and he was the main side of the video. 

Don't get me wrong, it was nice to be able to spend more of it watching him while I wasn't doing anything... aaannnnnddd that probably sounded creepy. But you get what I mean! Ugh... words are hard. 

I was actually quite impressed at his ability to change our costumes. I was especially glad that my costume covered the majority of my face, otherwise everyone would have seen me blush when Virgil changed mine. 

And, even though it scared me to death when he made everything black, it was just so... so... 

God, Roman, what are you even trying to say? 

I groaned, rolling over and shoving my face into my pillow. It was slightly warm from my head resting there all night. 

Is this what it'd feel like to use Virgil as a pillow? 

As soon as the thought popped into my head, I sat straight up, eyes wide. 

"Where the heck did that come from?" I whispered to myself, trying to remember what I had been thinking about just before. 

I was thinking about him changing our costumes and the blush and how I thought he looks better in his regular outfit because it's just more of who he is... 

"Oh, god," I whispered to myself once I realized what was going on. "I have a crush on Virgil." 

Falling backward onto my bed, I stared at the ceiling and thought of just how screwed I was. One, there's no way Virgil's going to like me back, and, two, I'm not even sure he's single. 

I sighed, not knowing what to do. I could confront Virgil and ask him if he's single, although that would bring the risk of rejection if he is in a relationship or has feelings for someone that isn't me. Of course, I could always just keep it to myself. But that might be even worse than not asking. At least if I ask, I'll know that I tried. 

As I was thinking, I heard a door close, followed by footsteps in the hall. 

Curious about who was also up, I drug myself out of bed and crept to my door. Being as silent as I could, I opened the door just enough for me to see Remy walking down the hall with a cup of Starbucks in his hand. 

Well, here's a good opportunity, I guess. 

Taking a breath, I opened my door wider and walked down the hall towards Remy. 

"Hey, Remy," I half whispered. 

"Yeah?" he asked, turning around. He was wearing his signature, black pants, white shirt, and black jacket with his satchel slung over his shoulder and his sunglasses perched on the top of his head. 

"Well, it's just... I've got a question... and I-" 

"Roman, honey," Remy interrupted me in a sweet voice. "Just spit it out. I don't have all night, ya know," he added with a wink. 

Taking a deep breath, I braced myself. 

"So, are you and Virgil... a thing?" I asked him cautiously. I'd seen the two cuddling often, although they hadn't said anything about their relationship to any of the other sides. I seriously hoped not, because, as I just figured out earlier, I was falling for the dark trait. 

"What can I say?" Remy smirked, taking a sip of his drink. "We're closer than peas in a pod, and I know him more than you ever could. Why do you ask, babes?" 

My heart fell to the floor and shattered. They're together. Of course, they are. I should have been able to see that. 

"N-no reason," I mumbled to Remy, my eyes on the floor while I tried not to cry. "I-I'm gonna go sleep." 

I didn't even wait for Remy to reply before I hurried back to my room. As soon as the door shut behind me, I leaned my back against it and slid to the floor, letting my tears flow free. 

Holding my hand over my mouth, I tried my best to muffle my sobs, but they soon became too much for me to bear. Wrapping my arms around my legs, I rested my head on my knees. The sobs became louder and more frequent, but I couldn't care. Sometimes sobs are the only thing that can fix a broken heart.  

A/N: 

Welcome to the end of chapter 1!!!! 

Again, I was inspired by a list of Sanders Sides drabbles that mind_writing had in their book of Sanders Sides one shots. (fyi, they're all amazing and you should totally go read them.) 

I hope you enjoyed!! 

Until next time, 

Take it easy guys, gals, and non-binary pals! 

~death_by_fanfic