Title

The title A Young Witch's Journey is not really a very creative title —it's basic if anything—but, it does tell me something to do with the book. It mentions the word 'witch', hence, I'm assuming that the book is about a witch protagonist and that the book is most likely of the fantasy genre. The title makes me think that the main character is going on some kind of journey, maybe one which will help them discover and learn more about themselves.

Cover

The book cover is very simple; it appears to be a drawing of a witch with her back turned and a little book opened filled with symbols. I'm guessing that's a witches book or something of that sort.

Personally, I can't say I'm too keen on the cover as it doesn't appeal to me nor does it interest me much. As a reader, I had to really focus on the cover and look for the small details on it which was difficult as it's not the best of quality. The font is suitable and the colour is visible against the background, so that's good enough.

Some feedback would be to try and use a more high quality image for your book cover. They can easily be found on the internet and edited to your needs. If this idea does appeal to you, you could request a cover from our Graphics Book of you would like.

Blurb

The blurb is satisfactory, as you've introduced us to the main character, Calytrix, and we find out she's a witch—as I expected. We're given a bit of information about what's going on in the witch world around her as the magic is declining and there are other issues developing.

I feel like the first section of the blurb is okay, but the second section does spoil it a little bit; it seems like you're giving too much away. You've mentioned the witch meeting a mage and then forming a contract which affects her journey. I would have liked for this part to be included in the book rather than in the blurb as I feel like it's telling me what's going to go wrong already and I'd rather have figured it out by myself when reading instead.

Some feedback would be to try and summarise the second section and cut some parts out; try to make it interesting enough to draw the reader in so they want to read the book. Don't include too much or too little in the blurb, but enough to introduce the main character and her world.

First Chapter

The first chapter is so extremely long that you've even split it into five different sections yourself. The chapter introduces us to Calytrix; we're told that she is leaving her village to begin her witch journey as she is now twenty years old and so has to embark on this spiritual journey to find herself, or the witch side of her.

She begins to leave the village only to end up in front of the king himself who apparently has some kind of demon inside him. The king isn't too fond of witches and sees them as nothing which does anger Calytrix as she knows that another witch used to work beneath the king as well. She ends up having to protect herself against the king/demon by chanting a spell which banishes the demon and saves the king. Nevertheless, the witches guild get involved and think that she's doing something wrong.

Once again, she and the king are lectured by the guild and Calytrix is told she has to work for the king. She refuses to do this, as to her the journey is more important. She ends up having to carry on with her journey when she walks out of the village. That is basically the first chapter summed up. I can honestly say that I didn't find anything in the first chapter interesting at all. It just seemed to be going on forever.

My feedback for you would be to try and shorten the chapter or split the first chapter into two different ones because it is incredibly long and this made it boring for me as nothing was happening in it. I would also suggest making it more interesting by adding some kind of event in the first chapter. You could also try to make your character more likeable in the first chapter and show her personality more. 

It is important for the reader to be able to empathise with your protagonist so that their interest in the story doesn't decrease. This will make the reader enjoy reading the book as they will be hooked onto it and may want to continue reading on. Therefore, you need to keep it concise and a little more action-packed so the readers can get hooked from the beginning leading them to yearn for more.

Plot/theme

The plot is going at a very slow pace and it feels like every chapter I'm reading is just dragging. Some of the events occurring in the book are interesting, however, I feel like because each chapter is very long, the events kind of get buried in all the writing and it becomes boring instead of interesting. I was a bit shocked when Rheya turned out to be this evil witch because she just seemed like a strange girl. Nevertheless, this demonstrates that looks can be deceiving; we shouldn't judge someone by their outer appearance. I'm not quite sure what themes are in this book because I can't really pick up on them through your writing or the plot itself.

Some feedback would be to go over your plot again and try to include an event occurring in each chapter or something that will interest the reader and elaborate on this throughout the chapters. I would say to shorten the chapters as they're very long, maybe try splitting each chapter into two smaller ones as they're very detailed and have a lot going on. Concision is an important aspect of writing, so try to work on this. Moreover, try to include the themes of your book through your writing. For example, if the theme is mystery, then you would try to build up the anticipation through your writing and leave the readers wondering.

Writing

You use a range of vocabulary consistently throughout the book which makes it interesting to read the chapters as the words you have used stand out when reading the book. You have also done a very good job of describing the surroundings of the main character such as when Calytrix is walking through the village and we're given a description of the buildings around her and the little children.

Some of your sentences are long, but some are fairly short and seem almost unfinished. I think this is something you need to consider making changes to so all sentences are even and not too varied. You've also split your writing into chunks in each chapter which is fine if that's the way you like it, however, it's not a very appealing layout because it's like all the dialogue and narrative is crammed into one.

Some feedback would be to split your writing so this basically means separating the dialogue from the narrative so it looks better as in the layout and it'll make it easier for the reader as well when they're reading as well. I would also suggest including descriptive language such as adjectives throughout the book when describing certain things as this allows the reader to form an image in their own head by using the description they've been given.

Characters

Calytrix seems like a nice young woman who's all set out for her journey and trying to do the right thing. Obviously, nothing is that easy, she will come across obstacles which she has to overcome. You've done a good job of displaying some of her emotions throughout the book through the dialogue, however, I would like to see more of her emotion through her actions. For example, if she's angry then I want to see her go crazy with a spell or scream or break something. I would also like to see more of her personality throughout the book because I feel like it's really lacking and I'm not able to get to know Calytrix properly.

Akios seems like a very mysterious character, he just pops in and out throughout the book when he's needed and then disappears. I'm suspicious of him and what his motives are because he seems like he's hiding something from Calytrix and I wonder what it could be.

Rheya seemed like a very strange girl at first, I mean she was just feeding the ducks one minute and then a few minutes later, she's transformed into this monster who hates Calytrix. Also, she's a princess who's a wannabe witch which is kind of amusing but she doesn't even know how to control her powers. It seems like she's causing trouble everywhere she's going, she's following Calytrix's footsteps in a way. I want to know more about Rheya and her past because it still doesn't make sense to me as to why she is the way she is.

Overall Impression

The book is okay to read if you're a patient person and you're not going to get frustrated whilst reading. I feel as though you have the plot figured out which is great and it is a bit interesting, however, you could definitely improve it further.

My main feedback would be to read other books and analyse the writing styles of different writers, you'll pick things up from there which you can include in your own writing and this will help you to find your own writing style so you're more confident as a writer and this will show in your book too.

I'm hoping all the feedback and suggestions I've given you throughout this review help you somehow with your book and writing.

Good luck!

Reviewed by: Pixie