Pacifica

Me and Gideon snuck into the mini golf course at about 11:30 PM after crawling under a fence post Grunkle Stan pried away.
"13th try!" I took a deep breath.
"You can do this, Pacifica!" Gideon said. I brought him along for the moral support, and the fact I felt a lot safer not being left alone with a 14 year old sadistic serial killer with a magical amulet and knives.
I set down the golf ball and swung at it with golf club, and it went into the wind-mill, then came back out on the other side. It rolled out, missing the hole and bumping against the edge before stopping.
"Ugh!" I threw down the club. "Are you kidding? Where's Sergei when I need him?!"
"Maybe something is broken." Gideon suggested, walking over to the windmill. "Help me pry it open."
"I'm not sure. Then wouldn't it be both breaking and entering?" I asked. "Besides, Mabel got it with no problem. I'm just a failure."
"No. Maybe she was using her amulet?"
"I would have noticed." I sighed.
"Well, there's something broken." Gideon said. "You won pretty much every mini-golf tournament in California. It has to be broken."
"Fine, we'll look." Picking up my golf club, I walked over to the windmill and pried the top board off after wedging my golf club in it. Finally, it broke off, and I threw it aside, then peered in.
"Okay, what's in....here?" My eyes widened. "Gideon!"
"Yeah?" He came over. "What is it? Dead body?"
"Look." I pointed into the windmill's interior. "There's little golf ball people!"
"Pacifica, you're being ridicu-WHAT THE HECK?!" Gideon looked inside, and screamed.
I just stood there, stunned as I looked down at the tiny golf ball people who were also screaming, who were golf balls with faces and bodies wearing Dutch clothing.
Eventually, their and Gideon's screaming stopped, and we all just stared at each other, bewildered.
"O-okay, are we all calmed down?" One of the male Dutch golf balls stepped up. "I-I'm Franz, and we're Lilliputtians! The name makes more sense written out. And we control the golf balls!" He pointed to where there was a track with different cranks and turnstiles.
"Wow!" Gideon gasped.
"Shucks, it's only our lifelong passion! Would you like us to elaborate through song?"
"Ah, no thanks." I said.
"So why are you hugelings here anyways?" Franz asked.
"Well, I have to play a golf tournament against my rival, Mabel." I explained.
The Lilliputtians started whispering amongst themselves.
"Oh, we know all about rivals." Franz said, his mood changing from welcoming to grumpy.
"Put a clog in it, ya windmill lubbers!" We turned around to see more golf ball people at the pirate ship hole. "These frilly poppinjays are terrible at controlling the balls! We are the ball masters!"
"Shut your mouths! Everyone knows ze Eiffel Tower hole is ze best!" We turned again to the Eiffel Tower hole, where French golf balls were gathered.
"Stay your comments, churlish Frenchmen! None control the balls better than the knights of..." On the castle hole, a golf ball knight removed his helmet. "Dipper Goes To Taco Bell Castle?" He pointed at the graffitti Wendy has made earlier on the castle. "Who wrote this?"
"We'll settle who's best! Charge!" Franz pointed out to the outside, and they came out of the windmill, while the other Lilliputtians came out of their holes, screaming and running at each other.
"Well, that's the moment of the day." Gideon said as we watched them fight.
"I had no idea golf balls could bleed!" I laughed, as I pulled out my camera. "Scrapbook-ortunity!"
"Pacifica!" Gideon took away my camera and stuffed it in his camera. "Guys, guys calm down. Your fighting is kinda adorable."
Franz limped over, bruised. "Adorable we are, but every hole thinks their hole is the best. If only there was some way to decide who was the best."
"Look!" A French Lilliputtian pointed to where Mabel was standing in the parking lot. "The jewel on her head is so shiny!"
"The jewel can decide!" Franz exclaimed.
"Pick a hole to give it to, and end our war!" A Medieval Lilliputian said.
"Um, I'm not sure. It isn't exactly mine to give-" I started to explain, but Gideon pulled me away for a second.
"This is perfect, Pacifica! These guys control the course!" He whispered. "Just give the amulet to whoever helps you win!"
"It's not exactly mine, it's Mabel's. Besides, wouldn't it be cheating?" I asked.
"She's cheating at life with that amulet." Gideon said. "Besides, they're golf balls. What harm could they do with an amulet?"
"But she is Dipper's sister-"
"It's now or never, Pacifica. Mabel's going to come in at any moment."
I sighed. "Fine."
We turned toward the golf ball people, and I took a deep breath. "Everybody! Or every golf ball I guess. We're going to have a game of mini golf! Whoever does the best helping me, wins the amu-I mean, jewel! Just remember, no fighting." I pointed to two golf balls who were about to punch each other.

Mabel entered the mini-golf course, where I stood on the sidewalk a few feet in front of her.
"Looking for someone?" I asked, holding my golf club in my hands.
"Waiting in the dark, not creepy at all." Mabel rolled her eyes. "Let's just get this thing started, okay? I have places to be. Ooh, hi Gideon!"
Still, Gideon didn't look amused.
"Okay, game of eighteen hole mini-golf." We all stood at the first hole while Gideon explained the rules. "Winner wins, loser loses. You get the gist. Understand?"
"Can you explain them again, Gideon? I don't think I understand it yet." Mabel pouted and batted her eyelashes a couple of times.
"Yeah, well, you've been playing mini-golf long enough to even be close to Pacifica's level, so you should understand the rules by now." Gideon said, walking over to a bench. "Go!"
We started the game of mini golf, and with the help of each hole, I was able to win each and every one of them.

Mabel

I was furious.
How could she be beating me?!
After she won another hole, (surprise surprise), I threw down my golf club. "I'm getting a soda! Gideon, want to come with me?"
Gideon looked up from his Instagram feed. "Huh?"
He was paying more attention to his smartphone than me?! How dare he?!
My amulet glowed blue as I used it to float the smartphone out of his hands and into a puddle while he grasped for it.
"You're the referee! Notice me, not whoever you follow!" I screamed, and went to go grab my soda. "Ugh! I'm this close to going Yandere!"
"She kinda is already." Pacifica whispered to Gideon.
"If I was a Yandere, you would be dead!" I snapped. "Want to make that come true? I thought so."
I walked to the snack shack, which was closed, but a vending machine filled with soda cans glowed brightly. I slammed my hand against the glass, shattering it, and slammed it again. The glass fell away, and I took away a can of soda and a bag of chips.
"This is ridiculous that she's beating me!" I said, tearing open the bag of chips. "I'm internationally ranked!"
I sat down on a bench and cracked open the can of Pitt Cola and drank it all, the pop fizzing in my mouth, then I spit out the pitt. "Ugh, I always forget about the pitt."
I threw aside the can and stood up to get another one, when suddenly something grabbed my shoulders and pulled me into the bushes.

Gideon

"What's taking her so long?" I asked Pacifica. "You'd think by now she would be calmed down and flirting with me. Anyways, I can't wait to see the look she'll have when you win."
"The look of murder." Pacifica said. "At least I have Dipper on speed-dial."
"You need to stop relying on Dipper for things." I said. "One day he won't be there."
"Relax, I don't depend on him that much. Besides, I could never face Mabel alone. As if I'd ever have an amulet, right?" She chuckled.
"Yeah." I laughed.
Suddenly, we heard screaming from behind us.
We turned around to see Mabel tied up in front of the Windmill course. "Get away from me, you creeps!"
Franz stepped up, holding Mabel's amulet. "I can tell you're loving this, right, right?"
"What are you doing?" Pacifica demanded.
"Well, we saw you were favoring a few other holes, so we thought, hey, why not win when you can just kill her?" Franz shrugged.
"Great, a hole golf course full of mini-golf ball Mabel's." I whispered.
"I'm calling Will! Where's my cell phone?" Mabel struggled to get out the ropes tying her down, but it looked like that had been chucked in the pond by some Lilliputians.
"That's not fair!" The other holes protested.
"Big Henry died for that jewel!" The Miners yelled.
"We worked harder than all of you!" The French hole yelled.
"Well..." Pacifica looked panicked as the other holes started to close around us, pressuring who to give the amulet to. "You'll just have to fight for it!"
Pacifica grabbed my arm and dragged me away as the Lilliputtians started to fight amongst themselves for the amulet.
"What about Mabel?" I asked her, as we ran through the crowd.
"She deserves it!" Pacifica pointed out, as we ran out the front. "If she gets killed tonight, she deserves what she gets a thousand times over."
"Won't you feel guilty?" I asked her.
"Gideon, the reason my parents are rich is because they commit massive bank fraud and force innocent people in nearly ten countries to go broke by creating malware to hack bank accounts! I think I can live with one death indirectly caused by me!" We ran out of the gates and hopped into Grunkle Stan's car. "Step on it!"
Grunkle Stan, looking alarmed, sat up and unreclined the front seat. "Are the cops here?!"
"Even worse! Golf balls!" Pacifica cried, and Grunkle Stan laughed.
"Alright, I guess you kids must be pretty tired." He turned the key in the ignition and drove out of the parking lot. "So, who won?"
Me and Pacifica looked each other, then at Grunkle Stan.
"Tie."

Mabel

I watched as the little golf balls struggled over my amulet.
"Hey! That's irreplaceable, you know!" I screamed. Nobody was making any attempts to untie me. "That's it! WILLL!!!!!"
The sky thundered, and a wave of bright blue light swept through the park, causing the tiny golf people to trip over each other and stop fighting. Will appeared in the sky, and floated down.
"Y-yes, Miss Mabel?" He asked.
"Untie me, give me my amulet, and then kill those weird golf ball creatures." I ordered him. Will sliced away the ropes tying me up, and picked up my amulet and gave it to me, which I fixed back in my headband.
"Are you sure y-you want m-me to k-kill th-them-" Will started, but I hugged impatiently.
"Will, act like a real demon for once. Of course I want you to kill them, or I could just replace you with who's your brother from another dimension? Bill?"
"N-no! That's n-not necessary!" He said, and held out his arms toward the golf ball men. There was a flash of blue lightning, the agonized screams, and then there were just golf balls, lying there, spilled all over the ground. "H-here you go."
"Wonderful." I smiled. "Not very gory, though. Please, more blood next time."
"Y-yes, ma'am." He nodded.
"Now take me home, Will." I ordered. He nodded the top of his triangular self, and in a zap of blue, we were gone.