chapter four
reveries
[shawn mendes]
-
"can i just have a beer to start with?" i ask, as geoff orders the table a round of drinks. anya snorts next to me, and i look at her confused. "what?"

"are you planning to get drunk or something?" she laughs, folding her arms and turning to face me.

"maybe, maybe not." i shrug, letting out a small chuckle. "what about you?"

"geoff? could i have a gin and tonic?" she asks, turning to geoff, who's taking the orders. she turns back to me, cocking a smirk. "that'll be my only drink for tonight."

"only one? you do realise you can go crazy on these nights, right? island pay for these." i laugh at her, as she raises her eyebrows.

"oh really? how about a round of shots for us two then?" from what i remember from my dream, anya's a little bit too good with her alcohol.

"how many?" i ask, trying to play with her mind.

"eight, each." she says. "forget the beer and gin. i want eight shots of tequila." i chuckle at her, rolling my eyes.

"oh you're on, princess." i tease back, the two of us standing up and heading to the bar. anya orders 16 shots of tequila. the bar tender hands us the tray, placing it in front of us.

"ready to get your ass kicked?" anya asks me, the two of us taking a shot each. i let out a laugh, bringing the shot glass up to my lips.

"oh it's on," i say. "last to finish buys the other one food."

"i hope you're prepared to buy me food then," she smirks back. honestly i think i'm falling even more in love with her than i was. "on three, one, two, three!"

i immediately slurp the first shot down, following it with lime, reaching for my second and following it with the lime again. i briefly look at anya, who had four shots beside her, and not even flinching as she downs her fifth.

"damn," i whisper under my breath, taking my third shot, feeling the burn, before finishing it off with the lime. i finish two more shots, and then i notice anya on her last one, so i don't even bother with the rest.

"you're such a loser!" anya giggles, putting her lime down. "you owe me some food now!" she tucks a piece of her brown hair behind her ear, still giggling at me.

"very funny," i tease back, rolling my eyes playfully at her. "come on, let's get out of here and i'll get you some food." i chuckle, holding my hand out for her. i see her cheeks flush pink, as she takes my hand, following me back to the main table. "hey guys, sorry to cut this all short, but anya beat me at shots, so i have to go buy her food. we'll see you all tomorrow morning then, dinners been great! thank you!" i say quickly, before rushing out of the bar with anya, leaving us in the warm australian evening air.

"where to?" i ask anya, swaying our hands, as she looks around us.

"the beach, there's got to be some places for ice cream there." she says, looking out at the beach which starts directly opposite the current road we are on. i nod at her, crossing the road safely, before we reach the opening area to the beach and promenade. as soon as we reach the sand, anya slips off her sandals, holding them in her hand and letting go of my hand. i follow her actions, slipping off my own shoes, leaving me in my jeans and a button up.

"look, there's something there." i point to a shack where a group of teens are, collecting ice cream cones. "come on, let's go get some," i knit my fingers with anya's, guiding her to the shack, where we wait in the queue, anya deciding on the flavour she wants.

"hi, what can i serve you today?" the girl at the shack asks us, picking up a ice cream scoop.

"um, i'll have a chocolate cone, and anya, what do you want?" i ask her, looking down.

"i'll have a mint choc chip." she says, looking up with a smile.

"that'll be 4.60." the girl says, starting to fix up our order. i quickly pay for the two cones, anya collecting hers, and myself collecting mine.

"thanks shawn," anya hums, starting to demolish her cone, as she walks next to me down the beach. "lets go walk near the water!" she rushes off to the water line, and i let out a chuckle, following her.

her hair whips up in the light breeze, and the sunlight kisses her tanned skin gently, her shoulders practically sparkling in the late afternoon light. i feel my mouth slightly go ajar, as i continue to study the beauty in front of me.

"you done staring at me?" she raises an eyebrow at me, finishing her ice cream cone.

"i was admiring the sun behind you." i quickly cover up. "look at it, the orange really does compliment the pink." she turns around, looking at the sunset in awe. "but you know, you sort of do add to that view." her cheeks flush pink and she looks down, letting out a small chuckle.

"shawn, i can't accept any compliments from you." she shakes her head, looking up at me.

"why? i'm just complimenting you, not dreaming about you." well... that might be a lie. she scoffs at me, playfully rolling her eyes. "hey, just let me call you pretty." i nudge her shoulder with my arm and she lets out a laugh.

"what's your perception of all of this?" she asks me, the cool water lapping up at our feet. "this relationship, your life, everything?"

"this relationship is just the work of andrew, to be completely honest with you. at first i was complaining, but who wouldn't, you know? you've been given a girlfriend and now you are expected to be in love with someone you don't know?" well... that's not exactly hard for me. "i think it's original, but troublesome. obviously andrew wants to keep my name in the media, so a relationship would be great. i completely understand that." i pause for a moment, looking up. "my life, to me, is crazy. sometimes i feel like it never really sleeps, you know? everything is so fast, and so unpredictable. i mean, literally summer just gone, i was performing in outdoor amphitheater's of about a 2000 capacity, and then just now in september, i performed in madison square garden, and next year i have an arena tour, and some other things planned. it really is crazy."

"your family must be so proud of you." she says softly to me.

"i guess they are." i smile gently, kicking a pebble away near my foot.

"tell me about your family, what are they like?" she asks me, looking to me briefly.

"well, there's my mum, and she's my mum at the end of the day. she's always so caring, but i can always have a laugh with her, yet at the same time i can have the deepest conversations about anything with her. i love my mum to bits, she's amazing." i smile at the thought of my mum, as anya breathes out a chuckle. "my dad is like that typical cool dad you would have. he's into loads of music, and honestly i could really talk to him for hours. my dad and i have the same sort of likes and interests, i love it." i say, taking another breath. "my sister, she's a whole different story. she's always there for me in ways my friends and my parents can't be. it's like she really does understand everything, and she gives me true advice, even if it is harsh. she literally makes me laugh all the time, and i love her a lot."

"how old is she?"

"she's 13." i say to her. "you'd like her, and she'd like you, a lot actually. in some ways, your personality reminds me of her. it's nice to have that feeling around me when i'm touring and away from my family." she nods understandingly. "what about yours?"

"well, my dad walked out on us when i was 16, you know that though," she starts with. "my mom is like my inspiration. she's been through so much and the fact that she's still fighting keeps on impressing me. she really is the rock in my life, and honestly i don't know what i would do without her." she smiles sadly, looking down at the floor. "my brother was such a special person to me. when i was born, he was 11, and from what i remember from my childhood, he always used to protect me, and made sure i was happy, no matter what." she lets out a sad chuckle, folding her arms against her chest. "my mom told me that when i started school, he came with me and walked me right up to my classroom door because i was so scared. he made me happy, and made me feel free, even though i can't remember most of it." she lets out a sad sigh, but putting on a small smile after it. "i have a pretty big family, but we all love each other, and i couldn't ask for a better family."

"i'd love to meet your mom." i say to anya, as she looks up at me, hopeful. "she sounds like a wonderful woman."

"she is," anya mumbles. "i'd love to meet your family."

"you can, come with me to toronto after this trip." i suggest. "you are on online uni right?"

"yeah, but i was planning on going back home, like home, hamptons home." she says quietly. "but i would love to come with you."

"so then will you?" i ask softly, as she looks up at me, nodding. i smile gently at her, my cheeks heating up.

"tell me more about canada. what is it like where you live?" she asks me, an element of curiosity filling her face.

"i live in a small town in toronto called pickering. it's not too small, but not too big, but it's cozy, and i love it there." i chuckle. "it's like a large community really. most people know each other, and all the kids pretty much know each other too. i don't really know how to explain it, other than the fact it's home." i shrug. "i am planning to move out next year though, into toronto city itself."

"that's cool." anya says. "i've never been to toronto, is it nice there?"

"i love toronto. toronto city is completely different. it's really diverse and there's always things going on everywhere. it's great though." i explain. "what about the hamptons? i've never really seen too much of it."

"the hamptons is mainly a place where rich business people from manhattan go to in summer." she says. "but if you live there on a daily basis, it's completely different." i chuckle. "i mean, it's still the same 'you have to be rich to live here' thing, but it's nice. i like it there." she looks around the beach. "in some ways australia sort of reminds me of the hamptons, sort of." i share a laugh with her, as we continue to walk by the ocean.

"sounds great there." i say, making her chuckle quietly. "have you lived there your entire life?"

"more or less, but i did spend a year in la. now i'm in manhattan." she explains. "i suppose you've stayed in toronto your entire life?"

"more or less." i chuckle at her. "although i really would love to live somewhere else."

"yeah same here," she says. "i'd love to live in barcelona, or paris." her face glows as she looks up from the ground, making me smile.

"well we are going there next year." she smiles widely at me, causing me to chuckle. "should we head back to the hotel?"

"yeah, i'm kind of getting tired." she lets out a yawn, as the two of us walk back up the beach, sliding on our shoes whilst we do so. "thanks for the ice cream, shawn."

"thanks for beating me at shots." she lets out a tired laugh at me, whilst i take my phone out to order an uber. i look around after ordering it, spotting some paparazzi hiding behind some bushes. i automatically roll my eyes, turning to anya.

"there's paparazzi, give me your hand." i tell anya, as she looks up at me, reaching her hand out and nodding. "i bet you andrew called them since we were going out."

"oh well, it'll keep you circling in the media." she tells me, squeezing my hand gently. i smile, rolling my eyes playfully at her.

"come on, i think our uber just pulled up."
-
"shit," anya mumbles, going through her small bag, and rummaging around in the pockets of her denim shorts.

"what is it?" i ask, whilst we wait outside of her hotel room.

"i locked myself out of my room." she mutters, letting out a groan. "i'm such an idiot."

"do you wanna go get a spare key now?" i ask her quietly, as she sighs, shaking her head.

"we'll have to get andrew, and who knows where he is." she sighs once more. "plus both of our phones have run out of charge."

"stay in my room tonight." i say, feeling my heart hammering against my chest. she looks up at me confused, before playfully smiling at me. "come on, i have a sofa in there. i'll sleep on that and you can have my bed."

"are you sure?" she asks me, cocking her brow up. "i don't want to come as a disturbance."

"you won't be, come on." she drops her shoulders, giving in, as we walk up to my hotel room door. i take my key out, unlocking the door and revealing a clean hotel room.

"are you sure shawn? like i said i don't want-"

"shut up." i cut her off with a laugh, opening up the double doors to the bedroom. "you can sleep in here, go on. oh and you can use the bathroom first." she smiles thankfully at me.

"thank you so much shawn." she says in a mouthful, before walking into the room, and straight into the ensuite bathroom. i chuckle quietly to myself, before rolling my eyes and walking back into the main room, setting up the sofa for me to sleep on for the night.

"shawn?" anya calls from the room.

"yeah?" i reply, looking at the room door, as she quickly rushes out, holding one of the hotel toothbrushes.

"do you have a shirt i could borrow or something? i don't have anything to sleep in." i see a faint blush at her cheeks, and i feel my heart race slightly.

"uh sure, let me quickly grab one for you." i walk into the room, opening up my suitcase, and taking out a clean black t-shirt for her to wear. "do you need anything else?" she shakes her head, taking the shirt from my hands, before smiling that perfect smile of hers at me again.

"thanks again," she blushes. "and shawn, don't sleep on the couch. i'll take it, after all, i'm the guest here."

"i'm sleeping on the couch, you take the bed." i chuckle, walking to the door of the room, and stepping out of it. "night anya, sleep well."

"i won't on this bed." she grumbles, before stomping into the bathroom, making me laugh again. "stop laughing!"

"never!" i laugh once more, before walking into the room and grabbing some clothes for myself to change into. i rush back into the main part of the hotel room, quickly changing, and putting my clothes over a chair in the main room.

"right we're swapping right now." anya says, coming into the room and running to the couch. "go to your bed."

it's only then i notice her hair up in a bun, and my shirt being the only thing over her body. way to tease a guy.

"go," i chuckle, walking towards her, grasping onto her shoulders, turning her around, and gently nudging her to the doorway.

"stop!" she yells playfully, turning around and folding her arms. "you get your ass into that bed, and i'll get mine into the couch, deal?"

"no." i take a step forward, resting my arm on the doorway, towering over anya. "you sleep here, i'll go on the couch."

"no!" she groans. "you sleep on the bed."

"anya we are not fighting about where we are sleeping." i roll my eyes sarcastically, letting out a small laugh at her. she looks up, letting out a small chuckle.

it's only then when i notice how close we really are. my lips slightly part, and anya looking up at me, her mouth closing.

"sleep here." anya whispers, her minty breath fanning my face. "with me."

"with you?" i question. "are you sure?"

"the beds big enough for the both of us." she says quietly. "i'll stick to my side, you stick to yours. that way, it solves both of our problems."

"well you started this problem but okay then," i say, making her laugh. turning down sleeping in the same bed as anya? i would be dumb to do that. "come on, crazy." i let my arm go from the doorframe, guiding her into the room, as she lets out a chuckle, shaking her head, before opening the duvets to one side of the bed. i snuggle into the other side, holding the white duvet over my lower half, leaving my torso out of the duvet.

anya and i both sit there for a few moments, well, more like twenty minutes, before she decides to cut the awkward silence.

"shawn? do you think you could give me some advice on something?" she asks softly.

"of course, what is it?" i respond, turning to face her. she takes a breath, sitting up and crossing her legs.

"there's this guy," she bites her bottom lip. "we flirt all the time, but i don't know what his intentions are. i mean, he knows this situation, i'm pretty sure he does anyway, but he's still not stopping, and neither am i. what do i do?" and with that question, i automatically know she's talking about this nathan guy, not me.

"talk to him about it? i'm sure he'd understand." i shrug.

"that's the thing, i can't." she looks down at the bed. "i just want to be honest with him, but i know it'll be immoderate."

"don't worry, i know the feeling." i mutter. "just talk to him about it, it'll settle you. i know you say that you can't, but in all honesty, you haven't tried. so try, and see what comes from that." i explain.

"what do you mean, you know the feeling? what's up in your love life?" she asks me, genuinely concerned.

"there's this girl." i begin with, thinking this is the best way to indirectly tell anya how i feel. "she's amazing, and again, she knows this circumstance, but i don't think she knows that i've been literally dreaming about her. that's how freaking hypnotised i am by her." i feel my voice go shaky. "i-i think i love her."

"you love her?" anya asks, shock running through her voice.

yeah, i love you. "yeah, i-i guess i do."

"does she know about us?"

"yeah." i nod, looking down at my hands. "this guy you're talking about, is it nathan?"

"how do you know nathan?" she asks me, confused.

"i kind of saw you texting him in london." i say nervously. "but honestly anya, if you really do feel the way you do about him, tell him. any guy would be lucky to have you."

"you really think so?" she asks hopefully. i nod at her, plastering a smile on my lips.

"i know so."

"same to you shawn, whoever this girl is, i'm pretty sure she'll jump at the chance of being with you." anya says quietly to me. "thank you, for the advice."

"no problem." i smile at her. "goodnight, anya."

"night shawn." i turn the lights off, getting situated properly on the bed, shuffling closer to my side.

she really doesn't like me in the slightest.
-
poor shawn :(