March 12, 2017, 8:36 A.M

The morning sun beamed through our bedroom window, casting a light on the backs of Marriam and I. However, the light was obscured by a dark shadow, and a loud whirl. The shadow grew bigger until it consumed the light completely as the whirling grew louder. In an instant, our window shattered into a hundred pieces and our bed tumbled over, taking us with the fall. Our eyes popped open.

"What the heck was that?" I asked.

"Bet you didn't think I'd find you," a familiar female voice said. Marriam took a glance at her.

"You're the chick from Orlando, aren't you?'" Marriam said, "We killed your damn husband, that junk was funny".

"No it isn't!" the woman yelled, "And today, I'm suing both of you for that. Already worked it out with the court".

"Well," Marriam said, "If your husband didn't attack my friends, we wouldn't have to kill him".

"Don't slander his name!" the woman said, "He would never do anything like that".

"He did," I said, "We got it on tape, too".

"Lies!" the woman yelled, "I, Wilona Ann Jones, will not let you pricks get away this?"

"You want another lawsuit for messing up our bedroom?' Marriam said.

"Shut up!" Wilona yelled while getting back into the helicopter. She flew it outside the humongous hole that used to be a window.

"Talk about a rude awakening." I said, "But how we gonna get that fixed?"

"I got an idea," said Marriam. She went to the closet, and grabbed one of the spare white bed sheets, along with some thumb-tacks. Once she got to the gap, she spread the sheets and put thumb-tacks in the corners.

"There," she said, rubbing her hands, "That should cover us until we get a professional".

"Okay," I said, "I'mma try to get this bed back up".

That's when Mariah and Monica walked in. I immediately covered myself

"We heard some loud shit  in your room this morning," Mariah said, "Y'all alright?"

"Yeah," I said, "We're fine"

"So," Monica asked, "What the hell was that?"

"It was nothing," Marriam said, "Just a chick flying in with a helicopter and suing us for killing her man back in Orlando when her man was actually a huge damn monster".

"Wow," Mariah said, "That's crazy. If y'all need a lawyer, get me, I know what I'm talkin' about".

"Alright," Marriam said, "We'll get you, bae".

"Good," Mariah said, "See ya later, bae". She blew a kiss at Marriam before her and Monica left the room.

Elsewhere, In the woods behind the burned-down apartments, Marina and Bell slept side by side to each other. Marina was the first to rise up. She looked at the sky, and then the rubble from the apartments.

"The sky looks nice today," Marina said, "Those apartments, not so much".

Bell then sat up, yawned, and scratched his back.

"Good morning, Bell," Marina said with a smile.

"I'm hungry, dude," he said in a raspier voice than usual.

"Let's get something to eat then," Marina said, "What do you feel like?"

He stood straight up and said, "Let's get some donuts!"

"That's what I was thinking too!" Marina said.

"Yeah!" Bell cheered, "High-five!'

They reached their arms out, and

SMACK!

"Ow, that hurt," Marina said, covering her forehead.

"Sorry," Bell said, "You want me to kiss it?"

"No," Marina replied, "It's fine. Let's just go".

Together, they walked out of the bunch of trees into the city. Marina immediately spotted the burnt-down apartments, now a wide pile of rubble with a bit of smoke rising from it. A few spectators surrounded the damage.

"You know," Marina said, "Part of me feels bad for burning down the apartments. All those people might be dead, and all their stuff is gone".

"Well," Bell said, "Don't feel bad. I've seen TV, this stuff always gets fixed in three days". They resumed walking.

"But then," Marina continued, her voice slightly deeper, "The other half wanted to watch it burn and chew all the ashes".

"My mom says you shouldn't play with fire," Bell said.

"You helped me yesterday," Marina replied, "A little late to start following rules".

"Oh nooo!" Bell cried, arms to the sky, "The po-po's gonna get us!".

"Not if we're quiet about it," Marina said.

"But they might ask us questions!" Bell cried.

"Just lie then," Marina said, opening the door for him , "You're making this a way bigger deal than it needs to be. Calm down"

The aroma of freshly baked donuts struck their noses as they approached Shanequia, the cashier.

"Good morning, welcome to Krispy Kreme," she said, "How can I help you?"

"Let me get a chocolate, coffee-filled, donut," Marina said, "And a grande mocha frappuccino".

"Okay," she said, "That will be five dollars and twenty cents". Marina pulled out Bell's wallet and paid the fare.

Shanequia then looked at Bell and asked, "What would you have sir?"

Bell was in a frozen state; All he could do was gaze at Shanequia's face with his mouth open.

"Hello," she said, snapping her fingers, "Are you gonna order to stare at me?"

"Stare at you," He said, "You're like, so hot!"

"Oh, if a million dudes haven't told me that before," she said, "But are you gonna order something?".

"You guys do happy meals?" he asked.

"No," Shanequia said, "Are you gonna order something or not?".

"You got dounts filled with green soda?" he asked.

"You're in luck!" she said, "Today's our first day with them on the menu, and you're buying the first one!".

"Really!" Bell said, "What do I win?"

"The damn donut!" Shanequia said, "Your total is two dollars and fifty cents, pay up!".

Bell pointed to Marina and said, "She got my money!".

Marina said, "Right," pulled out three dollars, and gave it to Shanequia, who later gave the appropriate change.

"Your order number is 52, by the way," she said to them.

"That's my favorite number," Bell said as him and Marina walked to a window-side table. They sat on opposite ends, giving Marina a direct view of the television, which was tuned to LBS news.

"And that's how a man lost his arm at the zoo," the male anchor said at his desk, "Up next, two terrorists are accused of burning down Timmy Turner Apartments. The suspects are teenagers Marina Jane and Bell Bell. We now turn to local stripper, Fire-bird, for an eye-witness account". The camera cut to Hardee's, where Frank and Katie, both wearing blue and white suits, were standing. Fire-bird stood next to them.

Frank grabbed his mircophone and said, "Hot damn you sexy, so anyways, tell me what you saw while leaving Timmy Turner Apartments".

"So," she explained, "I was walking out of this dusty dudes apartment and I see Marina's fine self with a bottle of gasoline and that dumb dude with her was pouring it around the apartment. I don't know why they did it, but I had to get the hell out".

"Very interesting," Katie said, "How do you think they should be punished?"

"I can think of 100 different ways"

"Lol," Frank said, "Well, we just got an alert that if you see these two terrorists, call 911 and turn them to the police. Not only will you receive a 50,000 reward, but a lollipop"

"A lollipop dude! Come on!" Katie yelled, "If y'all want that, better find these threats to American Society".

Angry stares were immediately granted to Marina and Bell.

"Those people are making weird faces at me," Bell said.

"We gotta get the hell out of here," Marina said. She grabbed his hand and they scrammed through the back door as the restaurant patrons dashed behind them. They zoomed behind yards, pool, and hopped about a million fences before stopping at a stray bench behind the football stadium.

"Thanks for the surprise exercise," Bell said.

"That wasn't a surprise exercise," Marina said, "There's a price on our damn heads!"

"Oh really," Bell said, "How much they cost? Cause I've been trying to sell this head for a minute, and I want a prettier one"

Marina responded with her voice a bit louder, "They're trying to kill us because we burned those stupid apartments!"

"Why?" Bell said, "They were ugly and dingy".

"People lived there," Marina said, "Terrible people, but still people".

"At least they can find a better place to live, " Bell said, smiling.

"Most of them are dead!" Marina said.

"Oh," Bell said, "We screwed up".

"I know," Marina said, "If we hide here for a while, nobody will find us".

"Those are sons of witches who burnt the damn apartments!" A nearby walking man stopped and looked at them. He had a puppy that barked like an alarm.

"Ah crap!" Marina said, "We gotta scram".

"But look at the cute puppy," Bell said.

"Dump it," Marina said, grabbing his hand as she zoomed from the man.

"I don't wanna," Bell remarked.

Back in our room, I showered and donned a suit with a matching black blazer and pants, complete with a green button-up shirt and a tie. Marriam sat at the counter, drinking gin and juice, wearing black jeans, a matching a matching jacket, with a green shirt illustrating a raised fist.

"That's an...interesting outfit," I commented.

"Well, yeah," she replied, "I'm not taking this woman seriously. Her stupid little husband screweed me over and she's suing us? She crashed a damn plane in my bedroom and has the nerve to sue us after all of that? Get lost!".

"Yeah," I said, "Not to mention we have tapes. No matter what she does, we're gonna win".

"It's still jacked up," Marriam said.

"We could knock her out and ditch court," Monica said, "But that's just me".

"Girl, I would pay you to," Marriam said, "Cops won't do nothin' anyways". She then took another swig from her bottle.

Thomas, while walking to the fridge, held the tapes in his hands.

"They're gonna be in your favor anyways," he said, "The end of the footage is missing, but you could still see that cop and his little baton stunt".

"Good," Marriam said, "Maybe we could bring that lady here and make her watch it! Talkin' about 'my hubby is a saint' and all that nonsenese!". She slammed her empty bottle on table, but somehow, it did not break.

"Case starts in 1 hour," Monica said, looking at her phone. "Still don't wanna call 1-800-choke-em"?"

"Nah," Marraim said, "I'mma just show her what's up in court".

"Hey, y'all see this junk on the news?" Azyrea said.

London dashed out her room and asked, "What happened?"

"Bell done messed up again," Azyrea said.

"In other news," I chimed in, "We need air to breathe".

"But he really messed up this time," Azyrea said, "They calling him a terrorist".

"I swear, they call everybody a terrorist," Marriam said, "Besides, it's Bell"

"Well," Mariah said, "He and Marina burnt down those apartments last night. 151 people died".

"Damn," Monica said, "I just realize I left my earring back in there".

"At least those 'Young Thieves' dudes are dead," Marriam said.

I had prepared to sit next to her with some bacon and eggs. Then I heard a hard knock on the door.

"Grady to the rescue!" he said as he ran towards the door and swung it open.

"Hey you peasents," Darren said .

"Bow down suckers," Riley said, pointing his finger.

Monica sighed and said, "What the hell do you lame boys want?"

Riley's eyes lowered. "You must readdress us or..."

"Shut the hell up," Marriam said, "Just say what you wanna say and get the hell out".

"Our headquarters were burned down," Darren said.

"By that crazy girl we let it in last night," Riley said.

"Marina isn't 'that crazy girl'," London said, "You guys turned her out, at least show some damn respect"

"But we were going to ask," Darren said, "Can we move in?"

"Boy, you robbed us," Azyrea said, "Hell outta here"

"We can't be homeless!" Darren said.

"Oh well," Emmani said.

"I think it's time you guys get out of here," Grady said, "Or you can stay and be my lunch".

"Aw hell no," Darren said, "That's that crazy cannibal".

"We'll be back," Riley said. He pointed his finger and shot it.

"We have better places to be than your crummy apartment," Darren said.

"Why are you begging to stay here then?" I asked, chewing on a piece of Bacon.

"We were just giving you a test," Darren said.

"And you failed," Riley said. They then walked out the door.

"I'm suprised those clowns ain't dead yet," I said.

"They keep playing with me, they will," Marriam said, chuckling a bit afrtwards

Once I got done, I walked towards the trash and dumped my plate. Almost immediately afterwards, I felt a smack on my neck. Mouth agape, I looked behind me and saw Marriam giggling. I smacked her neck back, and she smacked mine back, then we kept going in circles until we leaned on the refrigerator and kissed like there was no tommorow. I gently wrapped my hands around her back while she wrapped her arms around mine, slowly moving them. Once we separated, we noticed Peaches with a stern look on her face, and a crying Jean Angel in her arms.

"Can I get some baby food now?," Peaches asked, "Jean Angel been crying for a good damn minute"

"Oh crap!" Marriam said, eyes popping up, "I almost forgot"

Down in the city, Bell and Marina ran until they found solace in an unkempt house that had the door wide open. Wooden walls and floors made up the entirety of it, save for a calm fire on the corner, and a blanket next to it where an older man was sleeping.

"Gross, old people," Bell said, wincing a bit.

"I know, right," Marina said while closing the door.

"I'm cold," Bell said, "I'm gonna move him over so I can get warm".

"Need some help?" Marina asked.

"Well, yeah," Bell said.

Bell and Marina went to the blanket, lifted the old man up with it, and rotated it a bit to make room for them. A tiny fire, however, formed in the corner.

"Aaaaaaaaah!" Marina said, frantically stomping the fire, "Die Fire Die!!!!"

The fire had vanished and Bell said, "Whoa, that was close".

"Shhhh!" Marina said, putting her ear to the ground.

"Meanie," Bell said.

"No, no," Marina said, I hear something below the floor. Sounds like a bunch of men cheering"

"Sounds like they're having a party," Bell said, "We should go!"

"Bell, we can't afford to do this," Marina said, "What if one of the men recognize us?"

"Found a hatch!" Bell said, opening a hatch in the floor that revealed stairs.

"Well," Marina said, "I'm a bit curious to see what's down there".

"Really?" Bell said, hastily undoing his pants.

"No," Marina said, "Downstairs".

"Okay!" Bell cheered. They ran down passages of stairs as the sound of cheers and club music grew louder. At the end, they saw a dark room crowd of men in suits throwing money at a man and woman who exchanged blows and threw globs of chocolate at each other. In unison, they were cheering, "Knock him down!"

"Oh my God," Marina said. She put her hand over her agape mouth.

"Mud wrestling!" Bell cheered.

The manager, who sat in the back with a cigar, looked at them and his eyes popped with surprise. Then, he walked over to them.

"Hello young loves," he said, "Do you know me?"

Scratching her head, Marina replied, "No".

"Well, you two seem very promising couple, " he said, "Wanna be on stage? You could make a fortune?"

"Yeah!" Bell cheered without a second thought.

"Good," the manager said while walking out , "Surprise me, suckers!"

"Bell," Marina said, "Do you know what you just got us into?"

"Yeah," Bell said, "We're gonna be wrestling! It's gonna be fun, isn't it?"

"No!" Marina said.

Meanwhile, we all threw on suits or casual clothes and dashed out the apartments.

"I almost forgot," Marriam said as we scrambles through the halls. "I froze your boyfriend. Gotta get him out the mansion".

Peaches remarked, "Well, I hope we make it out alive".

"My mansion is not that bad," Marriam remarked.

"Last time I was over there," Peaches said, "Bats were flying out the shower".

"Not to mention all the snakes in the toilet, too," Thomas chimed in.

Marriam scoffed and rolled her eyes.

"Whatever, that was a long time ago. You guys are just wimps".

"Hold up," Thomas said, "I'm far from a wimp".

"You pooped yourself on a kiddie ride three years ago," Marriam replied.

"That's a lie!" Thomas said, "I, um, I um, I accidentally ate some laxatives"

"You did it when we went over the bump," Marriam said, "And you let out some crazy yell, dude. Stop lying to yourself".

"Fine!" Thomas said as we walked towards the adjecct mansion, "You win this time, Marriam Goldstein".

"I always do," Marriam replied, flipping her hair.

Marriam grabbed her keys from her pocket. Immediately,  we were hit with a whiff of cold air.

"Dang Mary," I said, "It feels like mini-Antarctica in here".

"Ah, Joshie," Marriam said, "It's not that bad. Beside, I like things a little chilly".

"Right," I replied, "I forgot that's what you like"

Chilly breezes continued to swirl around us as we trailed through the hollow corridors of the mansion.

"You don't have an AC in here, Mary?" Monica asked.

"Yeah," Marriam said, "But it doesn't work, it shoots out snowflakes instead of air".

"Sorry bout that," Thomas said.

"Wait a minute," Marriam said while turning around and giving Thomas a fervid stare, "You're the one who ruined my AC this whole time, and you didn't say shit?"

"It was part of a prank," he pleaded, "I wanted to surprise you but I was scared you would beat me up".

"Don't worry Tommy, I won't beat me up," she said, "But I will slaughter you later on for messing up my AC".

"Yikes," he said as we approached the elevator. Once we got on, I pressed the button to go to the second floor. However, the elevator began shaking, and sure enough, it was stuck.

"Ah," Peaches sighed, "Forget this crusty elevator". Jean Angel began crying.

"Something told me we should've took the stairs," London said.

"Sonebody help us!" Thomas yelled with outstretched arms

"First off", Marriam said, "Put your arms down, you're musty as hell."

"Rude," Thomas said with his hands over her heart.

"And I know the problem," Marriam said, "Too many people on at once. About half of y'all need to get off".

"How are we even gonna get off?" Azyrea said.

"You see that vent in the wall?" Marriam said.

"Hell no," Emmani said, taking a step back, "I'm not going in a damn vent"

"Ain't no telling what's in there either," Peaches said, "You might find Dracula".

"Shut up," Marriam continued, "But that vent will take you to the second floor, As soon as enough people get on, this baby will start moving. Now who the hell wants to go?"

"Me!!!" Grady cheered. He opened the vent and scurried in.

"This is actually pretty relaxing," he said.

"I guess I'll go next," Gretchen said, "Hold my baby!"

Thomas held her baby and said, "Hello little guy, I'm..."

"Waaaaaaaah!" the baby cried out loud.

"Rude," Thomas said, "You're not getting anything for Christmas!"

"Well", London said, wiping away fake tears, "This might be the last time I see you guys. Here I go!"

"I guess I'll go and join my baby," Monica said before climbing in.

"I'm coming," Thomas said. He passed Gretchen's baby to me and motorboated Monica's ass as she climbed in.

"Hehe, that tickles," Monica giggled.

As they began climbing through the vent, the elevator began shake once again. Finally, it began to move, and we finally reached the second floor.

"Oh my God," Mariah said, "What the hell is that?" She pointed to a moving black figure in the sky.

"It's just a bat," Marriam said. She pulled a shotgun from her purse and fired with lightning speed. It flopped from the air and dropped on my shoe.

"Wow," I said, "I never thought I would see the day animals die on my shoes".

"Anything can happen, babe," she said as she threw it off.

In the vent, Grady, Jonny, Gretchen, Peaches, London, Thomas, and Monica crawled through the narrow passages.

"This vent is suffocating me," Gretchen said, "Mary needs to hire some dudes to make it wider".

"I fit fine!" Grady cheered.

"Shut the hell up, you're tiny" Monica said.

They swiftly approached the exit, but Peaches had her doubts.

"Man, I don't wanna jump from here," she said, "How else can we get out?"

"I say just go for it," Thomas said, "Carpe Diem!"

"Y'all must be crazy!" Peaches yelled, "I just had a damn baby".

"Don't worry," Monica said, "I'll help you down".

"I'm good," Peaches said, "Besides, you might knock my lights out".

"So how the hell are you gonna get out tho?" Monica said.

"I'mma call Mary and see if she got a ladder or something," Peaches said.

She reached in her pocket and pulled out her cell phone. But no service nor Wi-fi appeared.

Peaches sighed before saying, "And she don't know why people hate her mansion".

"So can I help you down?" Monica asked.

"I guess," Peaches said, "But if you hurt me, I'm suing you".

"You ain't gonna sue a thing," Monica said as she crawled over to help Peaches down. She held her hand as she slowly tried to plant her feet on the floor. But Peaches pulled Monica's hand a little too hard, and in one second, both of them flopped on each other.

"What the hell?" Peaches said before laughing.

"Your fault," Monica said, "You pulled too hard"

"You weren't holding on strong enough!" Peaches clapped back.

"You should've told me!" Monica said, "Instead of pulling so damn hard!"

"You should've just known that, girl," Peaches said.

"How the hell was I supposed to know?"

"You were supposed to just feel it"

"You expect me to be psychic?"

"I mean, we're best friends, so yeah, kinda".

"Whoa," London chimed in, "So, I'm not your best friend"

"No," Peaches said, "You be playin' round too much".

"That's cool," London responded, "Shanequia gives me free donuts anyway, so whatever".

"That's why I ain't helping you down" Peaches said.

"That's cool," London said, "I'll just go down by myself ".

London leaped down from the attic, and would've planted her face in the ground, if it wasn't for the hands of her friend Monica.

"Should've just let her fall," Peaches remarked.

"Get ready to rumble," Jonny said as he leaped from the attic. But instead of attempting to catch him, everyone cleared the way. He flopped on the ground, and held his back.

"Boy, you's a big dude," Monica said, "You shouldn't do that".

"Well, thank you very much, supportive friends," Jonny said, "Now my back feels broken".

"Should've known better," London said.

"You're not helping," Jonny cried.

"Hello, I'm still up here!" Gretchen yelled.

"Chill, we're gonna get you down in a minute," London said.

"How about now?" Gretchen said.

"Get her down," Monica said, "I don't wanna hear her whinin'"

"I heard that," Gretchen said as London eased her out of the attic. But somehow, she managed to drop right into Jonny.

"Ow, my back!" Jonny cried.

Gretchen got up, dusted herself off, and turned her head to London.

"Ugh, you wrinkled my shirt," Gretchen said.

"At least I helped you get out the attic, be grateful," London said.

"Look who's talkin'," Gretchen replied.

Jonny hopped up and said, "Well, at least everyone's here, let's head out"

"Well, you guys go ahead," London said as she and Monica walked off, "We wanna stay back here and look around".

"Yeah," Monica responded, biting her lip. "Look around".

Meanwhile, we were already on the second floor as Marriam walked us to the laboratory. Mariah had spotted a black figure creeping up the plastered walls.

"Oh my God, that's a spider," she said. Immediately after, she was on the other side of the hall.

"Don't worry bae," Marrian said, grabbing a heel from her purse. "Mary's gonna take care of this!"

The eight legged monster was pounded by the bottom of the heel until it was completely gone. She then scraped it off.

"That'll teach you to scare my friends," she said.

"Thanks bae," Mariah said.

We finally walked into a room of beakers, machines, chemicals, and cold air.

"This is...DUN DUN DUN...my laboratory," Marriam announced before throwing her hands in the air and unleashing a ridiculous evil laugh.

"Duh," Azyrea said, "You acting like we don't know that"

"Damn," Marriam replied, "Let a girl make an entrance".

Shanequia walked in with a fresh box of donuts.

"What's up y'all, I just finished my shift,"

She went to put them down, but Marriam yelled, "Don't put them...."

A pink liquid fell and caused a small fire on the ground next to Emmani.

"Oh crap!". She jumped out the way and Marriam rushed to the scene with a fire extinguisher.

"Stand back! I got this"

She sprayed the fire until it was completely gone. Then it started back up but even bigger.

"Holy crap!" I said, "This fire is stupid".

"I know what I gotta do," Marriam said while walking to the fire.

"Babe, what are you doing?" I asked.

"Don't worry"

She leaned over the fire, and started spitting on it like crazy. The fire was reduced to a simple black spot.

"All better".

"Your spit must be made of magic," I said.

"It is baby," Marriam said.

We walked to the chamber that James was locked in, and Marrian grabbed a key from her pocket.

"Time to let him out," she said to herself.

She opened the doors, letting out a thick and cozy fog, and after gazing for a while, James creeped out.

"Hey guys, what's up?" James said with a giant smile on his face.

Peaches ran in, hastily put Jean Angel in Marriam's arms, and gave James the biggest hug in all mankind.

"James, James, James," she squealed, "I missed you, you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm just a little wonky, but I'm fine," he replied.

"Alright, we gotta test him to see if he won't jump at everyone he sees," Marriam said.

"I didn't jump at everyone," James replied.

"You're right," Marriam said, "You just jumped at every girl you saw"

"Lies," James said before scoffing.

"Whatever," Marriam said, "Shanequia, I need you to seduce him"

Shanequia dropped her donuts.

"Girl why me?" Shanequia asked, arms outstretched .

"You're the hottest out of all us," Marriam said, "And we need see to see if it works, right?"

"Thanks," Shanequia said, "But girl you do it"

"Nah," Marriam said, "I'm burned out man"

"You know what," Shanequia said, "Fine".

She trotted up to him like she was on a fashion runway.

"What's up big sexy?" she said

"Go away," James said, "I got a woman". He began walking towards Peaches.

"Wait!" Shanequia yelled.

James slowly turned around and scoffed.

"What you want?"

"Just look at me," She said "She ain't as thick as this ".

"That wasn't necessary," Peaches said

"I don't give a damn," James replied, "You could give me Halle Berry and I'd still choose Peaches. Tramps".

"Hold up," Shanequia said while scrambling her clothes back on, "I ain't a tramp, we could fight about it, brokeboy".

"Tramp, I ain't a brokeboy," James balled her fists up.

"Brokeboy, I ain't a tramp," Shanequia rolled her fists up.

"Tramp, I ain't a brokeboy"

"Brokeboy, I ain't a tramp"

"Tramp, I ain't a brokeboy"

"Brokeboy, I ain't a tramp"

"Tramp, I ain't a brokeboy"

"Brokeboy, I ain't a tramp"

"Wanna fight bout it?"

Hell yeah, I wanna fight bout it" and with that they charged towards each other.

Peaches shook her head and said, "Oh, for pete's sake"

"This has gotten way outta hand," I said, "We can stop, we know what it works".

"Nah," Marriam said, "This is way too good," and she pulled out a bucket of popcorn.

"Want some Joshie?"

"Sure". And I grabbed a handful of popcorn.

We walked out the lab and saw Monica, London, and Thomas eating peanut butter and jelly sandwiches while munching and dancing and singing along to Katy Perry's "Dark Horse"

"Damn," Marriam's eyes widened. "Y'all had y'all own little party huh?"

"Yeah," London rushed to put her pants back on, "It was lit man".

"Let me know next time y'all have a party," she told them, "So me and Joshie can join".

"It just happens," Monica shrugged, "We can't plan it"

"Call me while y'all dancing," Marriam said.

"Y'all can invite me," Grady said, with his hand raised like he was in school.

"Bug off," Monica said.

Backstage, Bell and Marina were prancing around, counting down the minutes until their "fight".

"Oh my God," Marina cried out, "How the hell are we gonna pull this off? We should've ran out when with first came in"

"You know," Bell looked at her, "Maybe we could wrestle for real"

"Knowing you," Marina said, "You'd kill me".

"We could fake it!" Bell suggested.

"How the hell can we fake fighting?" Marina said.

"I could just punched the air like BOOM BOOM BOOM". He moved his hips a bit with those last three words, causing a glass of water to fall into shambles.

"If it's anything like that," Marina said, "Then no".

"But I won't even touch you," Bell explained, "Just act like somebody coming for you".

"This is gonna look so damn ridiculous," Marina shook her head in her head, "Remind me not to go anywhere with you again".

"Come on!" Bell stretches his arms towards her. "I know you're mad, but it's gonna be fun. Huh? Now cheer up"

He tickled her, saying "Cheer up cheer up!" over and over. Marina immediately began laughing and chuckling saying, "Bell!". She got a stern look once again.

"Alright, now take your stupid hands off," she pushed him off a bit. Bell immediately obeyed her.

"Chill dude," he said, "It's just a tickle"

"I don't care," Marina's face turned red, "We're at a fight club, your tickles can't save us"

"That's why I came up with this fake fighting  rountine," he insisted, "Jeez, you're like, dumb"

"You're one to talk," Marina looked at him and shook her head.

The manager poked in and shot a smile at them. "30 minutes until showtime. I hope you suckers are ready!". He promptly left.

Bell threw his arms out. "Aw man! We gotta practice our rountine". He punched the air again, and his knee knocked over Marina's purse. She just stared as it fell to the ground.

"Bell, I have a question about this whole thing," Marina slowly turned to him.

"Huh?" He asked

"Whyyyyyyyy?"

At the mansion, Marriam looked down on her phone. It was now 11:36 A,M

"Holy crap we're late! Walk faster everybody!"

"Jeez," I looked at her as she darted across the hall, "You don't really care about time like this".

"I know," she said, "I just want give that woman what she deserves. Her husband's a sexist jerk, and she crashed a damn plane in our bed. She's not gonna cross us like that".

"I agree," I nodded my head, "We're gonna get some justice".

We walked up to the elevators and I commented, "Oh crap"

"We can't have this crash again," Marriam shook her head, "Some of y'all need to take the stairs?"

"And fall into a black hole?" London said.

"You could put a feather on them," Monica cracked, "And it'll still break"

"You guys are chickens," Marriam said, "Matter of fact, I'll take the damn stairs. Me, Joshie, and whoever else is not scared".

"I'm not gonna lose my baby to that abyss," Peaches shrugged and walked in the elevator.

"Y'all scared," Azyrea walked to our side, "I'll take the damn stairs".

Mariah, Emmani, Grady, Jonny, and Kimberly joined us while everyone else went into the elevator. I looked down and saw a swirling pile of broken wood, barely being held up by a rusty rail.

Marriam turned to me and said, "It's not that bad Joshie. Want me to hold your hand?"

"Nah babe, I got this," I told her. I held onto the frail railing, and with every step came a metallic creak. Surprisingly, the stairs were sturdy enough and I was able to get down. That is, until the second to last step. The wood plank cracked open and shot me down through a black hole. I plummeted further through the abyss until I fell on my back in the middle of four dark walls. I heard Marriam shout from above me.

"Joshie! I'm coming!" She dove straight down and landed right on top of me.

"You know, we could have a party down here," I could barely see, but I could spot her glistening eyes anywhere.

"Yeah," I agreed, "But I wanna be able to see everything though".

"Plus, it smells like old cigarettes down here," Marriam held her nose, "Let's get the hell out of here". She pulled out her phone flashlight and guided the way.

"You got stuck down here before?" I asked her.

"Hell yeah. I threw a party in here about ten' years ago, and I was talking to this dude who was a clown. He tried to pull a rabbit out my hair, but his dumb self pushed me down and I got stuck. And another time, me and London threw around a football. It was a glass football, full of bees and junk, and of course, I was on the stairs. She threw it too hard and knocked me down. And the football broke open...I still got a mark on my leg from that".

"Man," I shook my head, "That sounds terrible"

Then a lightbulb popped in my head.

"Wait a minute, you fell through here twice and you told me it was safe to go down here?"

"Hell yeah," Marriam laughed, "Honestly, I just wanted to see how you act if you were down here".

I smirked and looked at her. "Really? That's messed up".

Marriam said, "But you're not hurt, are you baby?"

"Nah," I said.

"Come here, baby," Marriam wagged her finger and we leaned against the wall. I slipped my tongue on top of her and she wrestled mine, trying to flip it over. Then I stepped on something scaly and withdrew.

"You feel that Mary?"

"Yeah, what the hell is that shit?"

She shined her light on the spot to reveal a living, breathing, alligator.

"Oh my God," I stepped back as it moved towards us.

"I got this, baby," Marriam said, swiftly pulling a gun from her purse. She shot it five times but it continued to lunge towards us. She even shot him in the eye, and it did not slow down.

"This stupid green jerk won't die," Marriam said, "What the hell are we gonna do?"

"I got an idea," I told her. I roundhouse kicked the alligator and sent his teeth flying around the room. Marriam's eyes seemed to follow every piece.

"Man, that was wild".

The alligator flopped over and she said, "Thanks Joshie".

"You welcome," I said, "Now let's get outta here".

As we walked, a hallowing voice called out, "Mary, Mary, Mary!'

"Who the heck is that?" I asked.

"Probably just one of my old friends tryna scare me," Marriam said, "Let's just get up outta here".

"So I'm just old huh?". Marriam shined her light on the voice.

"Oh my God," I commented, "It's Cherry!"

She was sitting in the corner, munching on a mole rat. Her long black hair touched the ground

"How long you've been down here?" Marriam said

"For two whole years," She said, "I remember two of y'all got stuck on some roller-coaster called The L and some agents started throwin' grenades and blowing up stuff, so I hid here for two years".

"I remember that," Marriam said, "They had to shut that down, a lot of people fell off that ride".

"You and ol' boy got together?" she asked, pointing to me, "I thought he was scared of you".

"Nah," I told her, "I ain't scared of my baby"

Marriam looked at me. "Boo!"

"Aaah!" I yelled before realizing what I did. "Ah crap"

"I swear, y'all stupid," Cherry commented.

"I can't get over the fact that you stayed here for two years," Marriam said, "What the hell did you do down here? I can't survive this place for a minute".

"You got a lot of naked mole rats around here," Cherry said, "And they all taste good, the skin is so salty".

"So you've been eating Rufus for two years?" Marriam asked.

"Hell yeah, Rufus tastes good".

"So, you've been down here two years, and you haven't found an escape?" I asked Cherry

"No, not at all," Cherry said, "I've been walkin' all over here, only to find more darkness".

"Ooh, you could use that in a book," Marriam commented, "That was lowkey deep".

"Thanks," Cherry smiled a bit.

"Man, we gotta get out of here". I started pacing around the room. "We're already an hour late for court. We gotta find a way out of here"

"I remember how I did it," Marriam said, pulling out a gun.

"Oh, we gon mess around and kill somebody," Cherry said.

"You're damn right," Marriam bragged. She started shooting holes into the wall until a bright circular light appeared.

"I don't think that hole is big enough yet," I commented, "We need a hole everyone can crawl through"

Marriam fired some more shots in the wall.

"How about now?," she said with a sly laugh.

"Yeah," I said, "Let's go".

We crawled through the bright tunnel, but as we went further, the light began to shrink.

"Damn, I didn't shoot enough holes," Marriam commented. She reloaded her gun and she shot up the passageway even more as we crawled through. At the end, she shot a random man and the people, including our own crew, began to scramble.

"Relax y'all," Marriam said as we rose out passage, "It's us!"

"You just came outta nowhere and started shooting," Mariah said, "Of course we gon be scared".

Meanwhile, Marina and Bell only had a minute until their fight.

"Are you done practicing?' Marina complained, picking up her phone, "You practically knocked everything over".

"Yeah," Bell said. He then sprouted up.

"I got stage fright!". He ran over and tightly hugged Marina. "Help me! Awww, help me".

"You're the one who got us into this," she said, "Don't complain now".

"It was an accident," Bell brought his hands together. "Look, I'm sorry! I'll buy you ice cream, I'll paint your nails, I'll even paint your toenails"

He rushed over to the make-up section and hastily picked up some nail polish, knocking over most other items. He leaped over, took off her shoe, and started applying it while humming until Marina leaped back.

"Back off dude," Marina said, "First off, that's the wrong brand, it rots your skin, and secondly, there's nothing you can do to apologize. Our fight's on in..."

"Come on Bell and Marina! You're up next!"

They slowly walked out of backstage, and Bell scratched his neck.

"My neck bone's nervous," he said.

"Mine too," Marina said while walking on stage with Bell.Crowds of people with stacks of money looked at them, and groups of men whispered to each other. Bell looked at Marina and growled.

"It's on snappy!" Bell said.

"You won't hurt a fly," Marina snapped.

"Start that music!" Bell cheered.

A 70s action groove played, and Bell began punching thrusting the air as Marina ran out and moved her hips as if she were dodging missles. He dropped to the floor and jumped up, and she rolled around on the ground, folding her self like origami. Then they crawled towards each other and Bell reached to hit her, but she air smacked him and he flopped like a fish. He got back up and pumped his fist, making her stumble back and fall on the floor. Putting his hands over his heart, Bell pumped his chest and Marina slowly rose up. Both of them did the robot, and did five flying cartwheels. He got some invisible bubbles and pretended to blow them as she frolicked across the stage, then she climbed an invisible rope while Bell slid. Once he got up, got in an invisible car and drove for a few miles. He approached Marina and came within inches of her. She flew across the stage, and flipped around. Then he did a fire hydrant dance and both of them bowed out.

The crowd was silent for a minute, until a drunken yell of "Hell yeah! That there's an abstract fight". All of them clapped and cheered "Abstract fight! Abstract fight! Abstract fight!"

"Good job!" the announcer ran up to the stage, "It looks like you won today's challenge".

"What challenge?" Marina said.

"To simulate fighting without touching each other. Just for that, you get to spin the wheel!"

"Wooooo!" Bell ran up, "I love wheels!"

He spun the wheel so hard, that he knocked it off the hinges and it rolled across the stage. The audience scattered and yelled as it hurled towards them, and with one drop, it smothered five people.

"Can, uh, can anyone get that for me?" the announcer asked softly.

Two men and two women carried the wheel back on the stage. One of them commented, "I can't believe I clapped for this dude". They placed the wheel back on its' hinges.

"Can I try it again?" Bell asked, pouting a bit.

"Hahahahahahaha," the announcer laughed, "Hell no". He spun the wheel and it landed on a million dollars.

"Holy crap, you two are about to be filthy rich!"

Bell cheered as airhorn went off. The audience began dancing as they went backstage where they met the manager once again. He flashed them a briefcase with one million dollars.

"Since it's two of ya, I gotta divide it" he told them.

"Oooh, gimme the one with the most," Bell jumped out of his seat.

"Shut up and sit down," Marina yelled at him.

"Don't fight guys," the managers, "I'll give you each 500,000 dollars"

Bell eyed a small cherry lollipop on the manager's desk.

"Can I have your lollipop?"

"Sure man,". The manager passed it to him then Marina sprouted up.

"Not fair! He's getting more than me! Let me get your chocolate bar!"

"Whatever," he said.

"Not fair!" Bell cried out, "Her chocolate bar is bigger than my lollipop. I'm getting two," and he snatched another one.

"But two lollipops are bigger than one whole chocolate bar!" Marina said, "I demand another one".

The manager stared nonchalantly at them.

"Are you guys gonna take the money or fight over candy?"

"Fight over candy!" Bell said. Marina lightly smacked him upside the head.

"Are you crazy? Of course, we'll take the money!"

Back in town, the group shared laughs at my expense as we walked to the courthouse.

"How was it man?" Monica nudged me, "You got to meet bigfoot?"

"Maybe a few ghosts?" London asked.

"Surprised you didn't find a new neighbor," Thomas snickered.

"Nah," I said, "But we did a fight an alligator"

"So that was his disguise," Thomas said.

"Oh, and we found Cherry, she's been living there for a good two years," I told them.

"Them two years weren't good," she said.

"How was the abyss?" London asked her, "I mean, how the hell did you survive?"

"Eating naked mole rats," she said, "They're pretty damn good if you ask me".

"I tried one a long time ago," Thomas said, "Hands down, the best animal I ever tasted".

"Y'all gross". Monica folded her arms and shook her head. "Talkin' about eating rats and junk".

"Don't knock it til you try it!" Thomas cheered.

"I don't gotta try it," Monica said, "I just know it's some gross stuff".

Finally, we were at the courthouse, and Wilona was standing on the side, looking smug as ever.

"Well, well, well," She shook her head slowly, "Look who's late".

"We just wanted to give you time to prepare," Marriam said, "Before you lose everything"

"Yadda yadda," Wilona mocked her, "I'm gonna prove to the world that you scumbags lied husband!"

"I'm gonna prove that your husband was a coward!" Marriam yelled.

"Where's your crew?" I asked.

"My son and daughter? They're at home watching who wants to be a millionaire," Wilona said.

"Man, I love that show!" Marriam said, "I always get the big questions wrong though".

"Me too," Wilona said, "It's like they start with these really easy questions, then they get really hard. It's like there's middle ground"

"I hate that," Marriam said, "If I was on the show, I'd never get the million dollars"

"I'd probably just stop at a thousand or something," Wilona said.

"You know, you're pretty cool," Marriam shook her hand.

"Yeah, and you're not bad," Wilona said.

But Marriam pointed her finger menacingly at her.

"I'm still gonna win though"

Wilona tolled her eyes and said, "We'll see".

We walked into the courtroom, and the seats were packed, filled with people murmuring about us. The judge, who was reading Fifty Shades Darker, looked at his watch and put it down.

"Finally, it's about damn time," he said.

"You was one of my teachers," Marriam said, "You was always late".

"Whatever," he said, "That class wasn't even important. Now let's get this over with, my daughter has a soccer deal and her friend is fine, especially in that uniform".

"Wow," Marriam said, walking to the plaintiff position. "This scumbag's handling the case". The rest of us sat down as he called the court to order.

"Now, I will call the defendant to tell her side of the story while I drink this slurpee"

Wilona went to the stand and began to explain her side.

"Well see, this crazed girl was acting a fool..."

Slurp!

".... shooting at cars and crap, and my husband rightfully arrested her. She escaped...."

Slurrrp!

"But she's so mad about it she can't even think straight, and now she says..."

Sluuurrrp!

"Damn it! If you don't stop with that slurpee I'll take out the straw and jam it up your nose!"

"That would be lovely," he said, "Now finish your story".

"As I was saying, she was so mad at me, that she said my husband assaulted her. Now, my hubby is such a sweetheart, he would, he would never do such a thing. I mean, he asks before he kisses me every night. Why the hell would he assault someone?"

Marriam rolled her eyes and folded her arms. "That is a whole pack of lies"

"Wait til she's done speaking," the judge said.

"It just pains me," Wilona said, wiping away crocodile tears, "To know that someone would attack my family and our reputation like that"

"That emotional stuff don't work on me," the judge said, "I now call on the defendant to tell her side of the story".

Marriam told Thomas, "Get the tape".

Thomas passed her the tape from his pocket. She then walked up to stand.

"This woman is a fraud and a liar. She's trying to play all innocent but she crashed a damn plane in my room this morning!"

"You hurt my feelings," Wilona said, still wiping away "tears"

"I don't give a damn. I actually have evidence of her 'sweet' husband being. He assaulted me! Yeah, I do some bad things, but I'm a damn rockstar. That's what the hell I'm supposed to do! No one deserves to be assaulted".

The court applauded and Marriam yelled, "Where's the TV? I gotta play this for y'all!"

Two janitors rolled the TV in on a cart from the closet, but one of them tripped over a lump in the floor and knocked it off balance. The TV flew and knocked Johnny out cold.

"Baby, no!" Kimberly immediately ran over to Johnny and lifted the TV off of him. He had a small mark on his face.

"I'll fix it, baby," Kimberly said, and rubbed some spit on his mark.

"Feels all better!" He cheered.

"Will someone get that damn TV?" The judge asked, slamming his gavel. "We're wasting valuable time". I got the TV, walked it over to the cart, and gently placed it down. Then it fell through the cart.

"Peas and rice," I said with my hands in my head.

"Hurry up and get a new TV!" The judge ordered. The Janitors rushed and put a slightly smaller TV on.

"Finally," Marriam said, "Thomas,  put the tape in"

As he placed in in the tape player, she said "I'm about to show you how much of a scumabg this guy really is".

However, the tape played a clip of Thomas chading Monica with a toy squirrel while she yelled, "Secure the fort! Secure the fort!"

"Oops, I put the wrong tape in," Thomas said.

"You stupid dude," Marriam said, "Put the right one in".

As Thomas switched the tapes, the judge commented, "You could've kept that one rolling, it was fun"

Thomas finally put in the right tape, and sure enough, there was Wilona's husband. We heard the audio also. The scene replayed on the screen and in my head.

"You must think you're a bad girl, huh?" he said right before he hit Marriam's legs.

"Get that away from me, you creep," she cried.

I yelled at him, "Stop harassing my woman!"

He turned around and struck me under the ear.

"I don't need anyone telling me what to do, especially a darkie"

The tape started to fade a bit, but everyone had seen enough. The crowd murmured in shock, and some of them just froze with their mouths open, especially Wilona.

"That....that can't be him," she said, "It must be an imposter".

"Look closer," Thomas said. He zoomed in on his face, and Wilona became stuck.

"My God, I'm, I'm sorry," she said, "I see why you had to kill him"

"I'm glad that racist pile of junk is dead," the judge said, "Man, I would've smoked him on sight, calling me a darkie"

He banged the gavel down, and the slam echoed across the courtroom.

"I find this ruling in favor of Marriam Goldstein. I order the plaintiff, Wilona Jones, to pay two..."

"Four," Marriam chimed in.

"Four undecillion dollars"

"What?" Wilona spread her arms. "How the hell am I supposed to pay that?"

"Not my problem," said the judge, "Case closed!"

"Yeah!" we all cheered and huddled over Marriam.

"What you gon' do with four undecillion," I asked her.

"The same stuff I always do," she replied.

As we walked towards the exit, she pulled me aside and said, "Time to celebrate baby". She hooked her phone to a speaker, and played Lil Pump's Gucci Gang. The entire court rose out of their seats and began dancing. Me and Marriam leaned, rocked, and even did a square dance, while she twirled the headphones around

"Hell yeah!" Azyrea cheered. Mariah opened a bottle of gin and vodka, and started spraying it everywhere as they bounced to the beat.

An old man got up out his wheelchair and kicked his legs around screaming, "Gucci Gang! Gucci Gang! Gucci Gang!"

A deaf man perked up and leaped over the seats screaming, "Gucci Gang! Gucci Gang! Gucci Gang!"

A blind man blinked a few times and his eyes sparked. He sang, "Gucci Gang! Gucci Gang! Gucci Gang!"

Monica, London, Thomas, Grady, Delma, Jonny, and Grady formed a soul train line. Lequeesha and the five teens formed a whole mosh pit. Jonny and Gretchen whacked each other we corn, then threw peppermints at each other.

The judge said, "Forget this soccer game," and twerked on the stand.

Jonny and Kimberly had a romantic slow dance, stepping every second in perfect sync. He picked her up, spun her around, and said, "Gucci Gang for life, baby".

"Aww, you're so sweet!" Kimberly said, blushing.

Bell and Marina came in looked for us, and promptly slipped on the alcohol. They landed right next to each other.

"Hahahaha...hehehehe"

They laughed at the same time. Marina stared at Bell, Bell stared at her, then he rolled over and shared a long sloppy kiss.

Lil Pump and his Grandma ran in and drowned us with meds. Miranda Cosgrove (Carly), Nathan Kress (Freddy), and Jeanette McCurdy (Sam) walked in. Freddy filmed as Lil Pump revealed a cake.

"I MADE YOU A CAKE," he yelled

Carly said, "Thanks so much".

Sam got a piece, ate it a bit, and threw it in Freddy's face.

"Tastes like defeat," he said, wiping it away"I can't believe..."

"OH MY GOD!" Carly yelled. She found a rainbow colored ring in her cake.

"ESKETIIIIIIT???" He said.

"Awww," Carly said, wiping away tears, "ESKETIIIIIIT!!!"

Everyone cheered as Freddy sobbed.

"She was supposed to be mine!"

Sam chimed in, "You shouldn't have been such a dork".

Lil Pump shot some confetti in the air, and everyone began dancing and bouncing around again.

Then I choked on a piece. The end.